Optimal Path Match for the XWF Universal Championship Match
Participants will need to ascend an Aggro-Crag like structure to reach the peak where the Universal Title rests.
HHL: What a wrestling showcase we have tonight! Some of the best talent in wrestling today all in one night!
PIP: But this opening match, Heather! No shortage of talent between these two… But, we might see a lot less technical wrestling…
HHL: And a lot more violence. Agreed, Heather.
A ring of fire appears at the top of the entrance way in the midst of a blackout in the arena, as “The Other Side” by Alter Bridge hits the speakers. About 30 seconds into the song, Elijah Martin slowly rises through the ring of fire in his patented black mask, a full length black jacket, purple and black wrestling tights and all black leather wrestling boots. Once he completes his rise to the stage, Elijah takes a few steps out of the fire ring and into a purple spotlight. Then the beat drops and as Martin extends his arms out to embrace the hatred from the fans, a set of pyro goes off and the fire extinguishes behind him.
PIP: Elijah Martin! Former Anarchy champion! One of the Crown Jewels of the CCPE wrestling empire.
HHL: But, in recent months, Elijah Martin has fallen in with Chris Chaos and Jenny Myst. Ever since, Martin has been harassing and stalking his ex, Lexi Gold. Elijah claims he gave Lexi everything she wanted in life! And he never got ONE thank you! Even IF that was true, does that make stalking and harassing her okay? No.
[white]PIP: SHE said she wanted to stay friends, Heather! What’s friendlier than leaving gifts in your home when you’re not around.
HHL: …I’m not going to dignify that with a response, you creep.
Elijah makes the slow, methodical walk to the ring, eventually climbing the ring steps and stepping inside the squared circle. As another purple spotlight shines in the middle of the ring, Martin steps in and after a few seconds, extends his arms again and pyro goes off from the ring posts, causing the house lights to finally come up.
PIP: Elijah Martin, one of the longest-reigning Anarchy champions in recent history!
HHL: True! But he has quite a challenge ahead of him tonight…
“5 out of 6” by Dessa plays and Lexi Gold appears from behind the curtain to a chorus of cheers from the crowd. She slowly makes her way down the ramp and gazes out on the jam packed arena before she runs roward to fans at ringside and claps their hands. The Golden Goddess then makes her way up the steps and goes through the botom rope and taunts a bit before she makes her way toward the center where her eyes remain fixated on the stage as she awaits her opponents music to hit next.
HHL: Lexi Gold! The Golden Goddess! Someone who has hovered at the top of Monday Night Madness’ IDL Division since its inception!
PIP: That’s right, Heather! Two IDL title shots! Lexi has definitely impressed fans on the Monday Night brand!
HHL: But has having her ex. Elijah Martin stalking her affected her ability to focus on the ring?
PIP: If it has, here’s the opportunity to get that weird masked monkey off her back!
Elijah and Lexi meet in the center of the ring. Elijah is muttering something… Possibly to himself, possibly to Lexi.
The official steps up… And signals to the timekeeper!
DING DING!
ELIJAH MARTIN
- vs -
LEXI GOLD
Elijah walks up, jaw-jacking. Assuring her there’s no getting away from him now…
HHL: Martin starts off this match getting nose-to-nose with Lexi Gold!
PIP: …Actually, it’s less nose-to-nose and more chin-to-forehead, due to the 9-inch height differential here.
Elijah sneers confidently.
But, Lexi refuses to break eye contact, refusing to show an ounce of fear.
SWOOP! With lightning fast hands, Martin grabs Lexi by the hair on her scalp!
HHL: Ooh, hair-pulling! First bit of rule-bending in this match!
PIP: And the official immediately steps up to assert his authority!
The official goes to admonish Elijah for hair-pulling.
But, WHAM! Lexi drives her head FORWARD into Martin’s jabbering mouth! Shocked, Martin is knocked back a step or two… He pushes his teeth, checking if one got knocked loose…
But, Lexi follows it with a DROPKICK… Elijah takes a pair of boots to the gums! He’s knocked backwards toward the rope!
Lexi sprints away to hit the ropes, building up speed!
… It looks like she’s going for a running clothesline!
…
But before she gets there, Elijah stop, drops and rolls under the bottom rope!
HHL: Ooh, looks like the opening didn’t quite play out the way Martin might have preferred.
PIP: No doubt. But, plenty of opportunity to re-assess outside the ring!
The official stands over the ropes, further pestering Martin to get back inside the ring before he has to start a ten-count! But Martin simply remains on the floor, staring menacingly at the Golden Goddess.
HHL: What a freak…
This leering pisses off Gold, who grabs the top rope for a dive!
But before she can, the official steps in the way, trying to establish some order around these proceedings!
PIP: The official, despite all evidence to the contrary, still seems to want a stand-up, by-the-rules wrestling match!
Lexi stares daggers at the official…. When all at once, she dips to the mat!
Between the official’s legs, Elijah Martin grabs Lexi’s gold by the ankle and DRAGS her kicking and howling out of the ring!
HHL: Not good for Lexi Gold!
Lexi goes under the ropes and into Elijah’s arms! Martin wraps his arms around her throat and head and… HURLS HER LIKE A SACK OF POTATOES! INTO THE BARRIER SEPARATING THE ATTENDEES FROM THE ACTION!
PIP: Oh my god! You could hear the sound of flesh on steel there, Heather!
HHL: NOT pleasant to hear. And I imagine even less pleasant to experience!
Lexi’s spine BENDS against the barrier! She cradled her skull, clearly worse for wear on the floor.
Elijah hovers menacingly over his ex, Lexi… He again clamps his fist around her skull… And… OH MY GOD, Martin bites her RIGHT ON THE FOREHEAD!
HHL: OH MY GOD. SOMEONE NEEDS TO BREAK THIS UP!
PIP: The official? At this point, he’s largely only made things worse!
Lexi paws, swinging wildly, desperate to break the bite! But Elijah, like a mad dog, only bites harder!
Elijah grabs Lexi by the skull and heaves her back into the ring under the ropes!
Lexi crawls backwards away, fresh bite mark on her skull… Martin slips under the bottom rope, stalking and menacing his opponent.
Martin grabs Gold by the throat and LIIIIIIFTS HER INTO THE AIR! Her feet dangle a foot and a half off the ground, kicking and struggling…
The official starts counting! It’s an illegal choke!
HHL: Finally! Some ORDER around this match!
1!
2!
3!
Martin breaks the hold, dropping Gold, gasping and choking, to the mat!
The official gets up in Martin’s face, telling him to follow his commands quick!
PIP: Clearly, the official is NOT happy with what’s gone on up to this point! He’s demanding Martin follow the rules to the letter!
But Martin… GRABS THE OFFICIAL BY THE FACE AND SHOVES HIM BACKWARDS ONTO THE MAT! The official tumbles over his shoulders, grabbing his aching back!
Martin grabs down at Gold to continue his choke… But Gold stands and…
PUNTS MARTIN STRAIGHT IN THE NETHARDS! LOW BLOW!
HHL: Yes! GET ‘IM, LEXI!
PIP: Remember, Heather. Journalistic neutrality.
HHL: Fuck off, Collins. I’m not calling a match between a stalker and his mortified ex even-handedly.
Martin grabs at the family jewels, agonized… But the official is still pulling himself up to his feet by the ropes! He missed the whole thing!
Lexi leaps, grabbing Martin in a front face lock on the way up aaaaaand JUMPING DDT!
Martin’s skull rebounds off the wood, looking daaaaaaazed!
PIP: What a maneuver! Lexi might just steal this one!
Gold rapidly dives for a cover hooking the leg! The official drops to count…
1!
2!!
THRE-NO!
Martin forces his shoulder off the mat, possibly more out of instinct than anything else!
Lexi grabs Martin by the mask, pulling up off the mat and… Whoa! Gold tugs the mask down over Martin’s skull! Martin can’t see out the eyeholes of his mask now!
PIP: This clever rule-bending reminds me of Elijah Martin’s hard-knocks style!
HHL: Martin claims he taught Lexi everything she knows. I sure bet he’s regretting it now!
While Martin tries to fix his mask and his vision, sitting up on the mat… Gold follows up with a SOCCER KICK TO THE SPINE!
Martin howls agonized! Lexi delivers ANOTHER ONE! A SICKENING THUD AS GOLD’S BOOT COLLIDES AGAINST MARTIN’S SPINE!
HHL: These kicks are World-Cup Worthy! Maybe Lexi should try-out for Team USA!
PIP: Please don’t remind me about the World Cup. If George Washington knew we’d go 0-0 against England, he’d roll over in his grave.
Martin, desperate to avoid a third kick, scoops himself off the mat…
Gold tries to keep the offense going with another kick… But this time, Martin catches it! And heaves her into the corner! Her spine buckles against the turnbuckle!
Martin, adjusting the mask back on his face… CHARGES INTO THE CORNER WITH A FULL HEAD OF STEAM!
…But Gold is ready! She catches him with a elbow to the skull as he comes in!
Martin backpedals from the strike! Gold hops up to the second rope, looking to take things high-risk! The official steps up to the action to try and reassert control!
HHL: Ref! At this point, just stay back! Ever time you get involved…
…The moment Martin sees the official, he grabs and tosses him against the corner!
The official slams face first against the turnbuckle, inadvertently clipping Gold’s leg, who falls down to the mat!
HHL: …Can we cover the official in grease or something so he’s harder to grab?
Martin, like a vulture, leaps onto the fallen Lexi and yanks her up into a rear waist lock… followed by a…
RELEASE TIGER SUPLEX!
PIP: WHAT-A-MANUEVER! This match might be over!
HHL: …
Gold folds in on herself like an accordion, tumbling over onto her front!
The official slowly pulls himself up to his feet, exhausted from all this getting-shoved-around.
Elijah decides he’s done playing with his toy and goes for the cover…
The official counts…
1!
2!
THRE-NOOOOOOOOOOO!
Lexi Gold refuses to give up, tossing a shoulder off the mat!
HHL: YESSSSSSSS!
Elijah, forced off the pin, looks a little annoyed at first…
Then, he seems to shrug it off, ready to continue the onslaught. Again, he grabs Lexi Gold…
Peels her off the mat…
And tucks her into powerbomb position!
PIP: Oh wow… Martin going for a powerbomb here. If he wasn’t trying to physically punish Lexi before, he certainly is now…
Elijah cracks his neck to the side, like he’s going to slam the HELL out of this one….
He brings up Gold aaaaaaaaand…
Lexi leans back! Latching onto Martin’s neck!
HHL: Timbeeeeeeeeeeeeer!
SITOUT FACEBUSTER! Martin is driven face first onto the canvas!
Gold crawls into a cover… Martin wriggles away to the side of the ring, but Lexi clamps him down to the mat and hooks the leg!
The official counts!
1!
2!!
THREEEEEEEEEE!
HHL: YES! Gold wins! Gold wins!!
PIP: Of course she did. Because of course. I hate this place.
Winner - Lexi Gold
Ring Master walks down to the ring as his entrance music plays. The fans in this Kansas City crowd pop loudly as the big man enters the ring and rolls his head around on his beefy neck.
PC: "Ring Master is coming down here tonight looking for a big win!"
HHL: "If Ring Master wins tonight, he sets himself up for a huge opportunity with a shot at the TV title!"
Emmanuel walks out onto the ramp in a trenchcoat and trilby, his hands in his pockets he heads straight to the ring giving quick glances at his surroundings. As he makes his way up the steps and to his corner, he removes his hat and places it on the turnbuckle, he then removes his coat, neatly folds it and gives both to the referee to take away as he rolls up his sleeves and puts up his dukes.
HHL: "Emmanuel is making his in-ring debut here tonight!"
PC: "Debuting with a shot for the TV belt on the line is a hell of a way to come into the company! This guy must have seriously impressed people on the indie circuit!"
RING MASTER
- vs -
EMMANUEL D'MONSTRE
Ding! Ding! Ding!
The bell rings and immediately Emmanuel D'Monstre goes on the offensive. Ring Master holds his ground in the corner as Emmanuel leaves his feet and goes for a jumping front kick! Emmanuel connects with the front kick right to Ring Master's jaw, forcing the big man back even further into the corner. Emmaneul follows up with an inside spinning elbow that clearly leaves the Ring Master rocked.
PC: "What a hot start for D'Monstre! No wonder this guy got elevated for #1 contender's match so soon!"
HHL: "He's taking the fight right to the big man!"
Emmanuel D'Monstre bounces out of the corner, offering the dazzled Ring Master an opportunity to recover. Emmanuel starts walking around the ring and hyping up the crowd, clearly beyond excited to be here for his first ever XWF match. The crowd starts chanting his name like wild as the Ring Master regains his bearings. After a few moments of crowd work Emmanuel turns back to face Ring Master.
HHL: "And now Ring Master is shooting out of the corner like a speeding bullet!"
Sure enough, Emmanuel looks shocked as he sees the massive Ring Master running out of the corner at full speed! Before Emmanuel can even react, The Ring Master nearly decapitates him with THE RINGER (running headbutt)!
Emmaneual collapses to the ground, clearly defeated and unconscious....but before Ring Master can make the pinfall, we see a few Bastards walking down the entrance ramp led by Charlie Nickles! Flanking him on either side we see Barney Green and Bobby Bourbon. Ring Master looks curiously at the Bastards as they make their descent.
PC: "Now what is the Brotherhood doing out here?!"
HHL: "BOB has always had long-standing beef with Ring Master, they might be out here to cost him this match!"
The referee sends a few warnings outside the ring as Ring Master watches on skeptically. Bobby and Barney smile as Charlie pulls a t-shirt out from his waistband. The t-shirt reads 'Clutch Murtaugh'. Charlie tells Ring Master to 'go ahead and pin the bitch', and Ring Master reluctantly agrees. Ring Master picks ups Emmanuel before holding them vertical for five seconds, then slamming his body on top of them as it hits the mat. Ring Master hooks the leg and the ref counts the pin.
HHL: "Slam of Fury!"
PC: "This match is over!
1!
2!
3!
Winner by PINFALL - Ring Master
As soon as Ring Master wins his match, all three Bastards slide into the ring with mysterious intent! Ring Master quickly picks himself up to a standing position as he watches Charlie slide into the ring first. Ring Master boots him out of the ring, only to see Barney Green now coming to town with a baseball bat! Ring Master ducks under the first swing of the baseball bat before kicking Barney in the back and forcing him to fall to the mat.
PC: "Those Bastards are attacking Ring Master!"
Ring Master keeps his eyes on Barney and Charlie, but he completely forgets about BOBBY BOURBON who hits him over the head with a double-fisted blow! Ring Master is pushed towards the ring ropes, where Charlie grabs him by the legs and forces him to fall down. Then, Barney Bobby and Charlie all start stomping the shit out of Ring Master!
HHL: "Someone needs to come out and help Ring Master!"
PC: "He needs to help himself!"
As the kicks keep coming in blood is forced from Ring Master's forehead. The sight of his own blood agitates him greatly, and we see him storming back to his feet, throwing all the Bastards back! Barney Green rushes Ring Master once more, only to be stopped with a big boot to the face! Bobby comes in next, but Ring Master moves out of the way and slams Bourbon into the corner!
Turning back to the final Bastard, Ring Master drops into a defensive stance as he prepares to fight the Supercontinental champion, Charlie Nickles. As Barney and Bobby roll out of the ring, the Ring Master tries to egg Charlie on. Charlie cracks a sicko's grin before wagging his pointer finger back and forth. Then, Charlie sets up the T-shirt that reads 'Clutch Murtaugh' against one of the turnbuckles. Ring Master charges at Charlie and tries to hit him again, but The Nickleman rolls out of the ring and starts walking away with his Brothers, all grinning like dogs.
Ring Master stands in the middle of the ring, bloody and confused, as he looks intermittently between the assembled Bastards and the t-shirt in the corner.
PC: "Now what is the meaning of all this?!"
HHL: "I'm not sure Pip, and I don't think Ring Master is either!"
As the Bastards walk back up the entrance ramp, Ring Master slowly approaches the t-shirt. Ring Master grabs the shirt and stares closely at it, shaking his bleeding head as he tries to make sense of this all.
HHL: "Still, despite the disruption from BOB Ring Master still came out ahead in this match!"
PC: "What an impressive win for Ring Master....but who's this 'Clutch Murtaugh' guy on the t-shirt?"
HHL: "I don't know, Pip!"
The Ring Master throws the t-shirt over his shoulder before exiting the ring and walking up the ramp as the new #1 contender to the TV championship.
The lights in the arena go deep blue as smoke fills the air. Pink and silver laser lights cut through the smoke and it looks fucking rad.
As Young Men Dead blares throughout the arena, slowly walking out onto the entrance ramp is Bobby Bourbon. He stops, surveys the whole of the arena, raises his fists at 45 degree angles, and continues his deliberate plod towards the ring. Bobby climbs the steps, then climbs the nearest ring post half way and raises his fists at 45 degree angles. The lights go back to normal and the music stops. The XWF Universe in attendance, becoming hooligans, all chant in unison.
*FUCK 'EM UP, BOBBY, FUCK 'EM UP!*
A figure is seen walking out from the back wearing a black hooded sweatshirt on. The hood was over his head so he couldnt be seen, and his head was looking down.
He stood in a stance. And as a white light appeared on his front, he unzipped his sweatshirt and showed the front of the t-shirt:
As it continued he turned around and took off his hooded sweatshirt and revealed the back of the t-shirt which read:
He turned back around and stood in a pose as the white light bathed on him to reveal: MASTERMIND
He then smirks as he walks all the way to the ring
"GRAND POOH-BOB" BOBBY BOURBON
- vs -
MASTERMIND
The bell rings.
Bourbon and Mastermind walk towards one another to the center of the ring, they begin a staring competition.
Bourbon looks Mastermind up and down and it's like he feels it's beneath him to continue with this match, and he turns around and looks out at the crowd and gestures towards them, which brings cheers and jeers.
PIP: "It's like Bobby Bourbon isn't taking Mastermind serious enough,"
HEATHER: "That won't go down well with Masermind,"
Suddenly Mastermind taps Bourbon on his shoulder, and no sooner than Bourbon turns around to face Mastermind, but Mastermind knees him in his chest, he bends over, and Mastermind places Bourbon in a DDT position, and executes it.
Mastermind gets back to his feet first, and pulls Bourbon up to his feet by his hair, and sends him running out over the ropes to the floor below, in a big, big heap.
The referee starts the 10 count.
1.........
PIP: "Bobby didn't want a piece of Mastermind, and was made to pay because of it,"
2........
Bourbon crawls over to the ring apron but remains down.
3........
HEATHER: "Either Bobby is playing coy, or he's hurt bad? If that is the case, then Mastermind has a big advantage,"
4.......
Mastermind walks to the other side of the ring, and slips underneath the ropes, he starts walking around the ring.
5......
Mastermind slips in and out of the ring to break the 10 count.
1.......
Mastermind continues around the ring, and Bourbon hasn't moved.
2........
Mastermind gets to the corner of the ring and spots Bourbon still lying in a heap, his right arm is underneath the ring apron. Mastermind waits where he is trying to decide on what to do.
3........
4........
Still Bourbon does not move.
PIP: "Knowing Bobby he's playing chicken, he has to be,"
5......
Once again Mastermind rolls in and out of the ring, to break the 10 count.
1.....
He walks slowly up to Bourbon, as he gets within a foot, Bobby makes a huge move, bringing his arm from out underneath the ring, clutching a sledge hammer, and he jumps to his feet, and hits Mastermind in the throat with the hammer itself, Mastermind goes stumbling backwards clutching his chin.
2.....
The crowd 'oohs and ahhs'
PIP: "Told you he was playing chicken,"
3......
Bourbon drops the sledge hammer, and hits Mastermind with a RUNNING KNEE, sending Mastermind crashing into the side barriers.
4......
Bourbon then walks over to the collapsed Mastermind, and helps him to his feet. Mastermind looks hurt.
5....
He pulls him back towards the ring, and slips him into the ring, and rolls in quickly, breaking the 10 count.
Bourbon pulls Mastermind to his feet, and sends him running towards the ropes, Mastermind rebounds off of the ropes and is hit by a CLOTHESLINE. He goes down again. Bobby Bourbon starts laughing. He is in full control.
Bourbon pulls Mastermind to his feet once gain. And executes a DOUBLE UNDERHOOK SUPLEX.
HEATHER: "Bobby Bourbon now in complete control, and Mastermind is in trouble,"
Bourbon pulls Mastermind to his feet again and whips Mastermind into the corner. He hits the corner post hard, and stumbles backwards out of the corner, clutching his chest. Bourbon follows up with another CLOTHES LINE. Down goes Mastermind. This does not look good.
Bourbon looks down at Mastermind for several minutes, watching him writher around in pain, he then heads towards the ropes.'
PIP: "What's he doing?"
HEATHER: "Something tells me he's not quite ready to finish Mastermind off yet. This could be a mistake,"
Bourbon climbs tthrough the ropes and jumps to the floor below. He kneels down and looks underneath the ring. The referee starts the 10 count again.
1........
Bourbon pulls out a steel chair and the crowd cheers, he throws it in the ring. He then pulls out a table, and the crowd reacts wildly.
2.......
"WE WANT TABLES," "WE WANT TABLES" "WE WANT TABLES" "WE WANT TABLES" are the chants from the crowd.
3........
He slides the table into the ring as well.
4.........
Bourbon rolls back into the ring, to break the 10 count. He then focuses on setting up the table on the other side of the ring without taking any notice of Mastermind, who is trying to recover in the corner.
Bourbon turns his attention back on Mastermind, and walks over to him, and stomps on him a couple of times, before grabbing him by the hair, and pulling him to his feet, He Eye Rakes him, before moving him and setting him in the corner, facing face first the other corner. Bourbon then slaps him. He walks to the other corner of the ring, and sets him up for a CORNER AVALANCHE SPLASH.
PIP: "I've seen this plenty of times before, this is going to hurt,"
HEATHER: "Unless somehow Mastermind has the knowledge to get himself out of the way, but in the state that he is in, that may be impossible,"
PIP: "If Bobby Bourbon connects with this, it's basically all over rover,"
Bourbon smiles from the other side of the ring, and basically toys at Mastermind, and uses his hand to make a camera, and clicks in the image, and then he takes off and attempts.........
.........
...........
CORNER AVALANCE SMASH
But just as Bourbon nearly gets to him, Mastermind manages to dive out of the way, and Bourbon hits the corner with such force that the ring shakes.
HEATHER: "Called it,"
Bourbon stumbles backwards out of the corner. Mastermind has landed near the steel chair that Bourbon threw in just a minute or so ago. He grabs it, and struggles to his feet, and attacks Bourbon with the chair, and Bourbon who is still in shock from the corner, has no idea the attack is coming until it is too late.
Mastermind hits him not once, not twice, not thrice, but four times and the chair is damaged just as Bourbon collapses backwards. Mastermind drops the chair as he collapses to his knees. He is already hurt, but so is Bourbon.
There is no action for the next few minutes as both competitives are collecting their thoughts and energy. Mastermind is the first back to his feet, and he walks quickly over to the fallen Bourbon, and knees him in the head, to give him more time. He pulls him up to his feet, and grabs his head, and throws it into the turnbuckle. Bourbon stumbles backwards. Mastermind kicks him in his stomach and he bends over.
Mastermind quickly walks around Bourbon, and within seconds is on him, trying to hook in the.........
MIND SLEEPER aka sleeper hold.
PIP: "Mastermind has used this move a couple of times in his XWF career to win matches, usually it's his Mind Controller move that finishes his opponents off."
Mastermind tries to lock in the MIND SLEEPER harder, Bourbon is struggling. The fans are going crazy. Bourbon drops to one knee. Mastermind is still struggling to lock it in effectively.
Suddenly Bourbon gets back on both feet with Mastermind on his back. He walks backwards across the ring, and then speeds up and collapses backwards into another corner. Mastermind hits the corner post very hard and lets go of the Mind Sleeper. Bourbon collapses to the floor as does Mastermind.
HEATHER: "This match is taking it's toll on both competitors, no one wants to lose this, that's for sure,"
It takes a few minutes again for both competitiors to find their energy back, it's Mastermind who once again gets back to his feet. He's on fumes at this point. He walks towards Bourbon and then suddenly.
WHACK
Bourbon hits Mastermind with a huge SHORYUKEN a.k.a A huge roundhouse uppercut.
The force of the punch sends Mastermind flying backwards into the corner hitting his back and his head on the corner post. Bourbon is back on his feet with the crowd going crazy. He walks towards the dejected looking Mastermind who knows the punch has put him into the middle of next week and he's having trouble seeing straight. Not a good thing for someone who has had a TBI or a Traumatic Brain Injury. Not after he lost sight for a few seconds.
Bourbon seems to look down on Mastermind with concern, and then it turns to pity and then it turns to not a care in the world. He grabs Mastermind, and pulls him up to the top rope. He climbs the ropes himself and sets him up for...........
BOBBYBOMB a.k.a a Powerbomb from anywhere.
PIP: "Surely, surely, Bobby can't hit this move from the top rope,"
HEATHER: "You've forgotten Pip, that we've seen him do this a few times before in his career, it'll be all over for Mastermind. He gave it as good as he received, that's for sure. He didn't back down.
The crowd is in a fenzy, as Bourbon is ready for the move, Mastermind starts to get his wits back and tries to struggle, but Bourbon has him under control.
Bourbon takes off from the top rope, and he gets enough milage that he manages to jump towards the table that has still been set up.
He not only sends Mastermind on top of it, but also himself, and they land on it with such force that the table breaks into a thousand pieces with their weight and lands on top of them.
The crowd starts chanting:
"THIS IS AWESOME." "THIS IS AWESOME." "THIS IS AWESOME." "THIS IS AWESOME."
The referee clears away the debri quickly to discover Bourbon lying on top of Mastermind, covering him, Both are not moving.
The referee goes for the 3 count.
1.............
2..................
2 and a half
Some how, Mastermind lifts up his arm to stop the 3 count, and the crowd goes wild. He struggles to get Bourbon off of him, but once again collapses with the imense pain that he is in from the fall. Bourbon is still covering him.
1.......
2........
Mastermind struggles again.....
2 and a half.
But it's too late.
3
WINNER: GRAND POOH BOB BOBBY BOURBON
Goth can be seen backstage preparing for his match, his eyes focused upon his hands as he has taped them for the match. He notices the camera and sighs
GOTH: Today was supposed to be a joyful day, a day where three competitors face off and only one will walk away victorious. But that was before I realized that two of the other competitors have truly devalued their competence and have disappointed me in so many different ways… That it is only fitting for me to crush them underneath my own two feet. So Jenny Myst and Xavier Lux, I want to thank you for showing up tonight and I wish to apologize beforehand for the pain and suffering that you will have to endure tonight. Because then and only then you will understand what I have had to endure to get to this point where I shall reign supreme….
With that Goth closes the door as the shot slowly fades.
Spotlights search all over the entrance but there’s no Ruby… until they look up!
Ruby is up in the rafters and leaps off!!! She floats to the ring with a banana-lime colored parachute and a fan propelling her!
Rubes lands in the middle of the ring and some crew members assist her with removing the fan and chute from her back. She then ascends each turnbuckle and raises her arms to the fans in attendance.
Vinnie Lane: “WOW! What an entrance by the one and only THREE TIME Anarchy Champ! Can you feel the electricity in this place for Ruby, Bama?”
Bama: “I just about felt like Ozzy Osbourne watching Randy Rhodes go ass over teakettle in that place, Vinnie! Ruby buzzed about six inches over our heads, she almost gave me a free haircut!”
Vinnie Lane: “Dude you always exaggerate…”
A handler with a cattle prod is slammed against the wall of the entrance as EDWARD charges him and then gallops to the ring with the Anarchy Championship dangling from his mouth.
EDWARD avoids the ladders surrounding the ring, and when it’s time to hang the title from the carabiner above the ring, it takes an intervention from EDWINA, who comes from the back and strokes EDWARD’s hair until he makes a calm cooing sound and releases his grip on the strap.
The belt is raised high above the ring while the audience looks on.
Vinnie Lane: “Welp, another animal handler lawsuit incoming.”
Bama: “I think Edwina is in heat, Vinnie… I smelt a musk when she come by...”
Ladder Match for the XWF Anarchy Championship
Anarchy Rules
DING! DING! DING!!!
The match is afoot, and Ruby tries to take EDWARD down using some traditional wrestling techniques. A headlock takeover brings EDWARD down but he’s back up right away. Similarly, a picture perfect high hiplock takeover results in nothing more than EDWARD bouncing right back to his feet.
Ruby avoids a swinging lariat and hops onto EDWARD’s shoulders for a crucifix pin, but EDWARD is just too strong! EDWARD flings Ruby to the mat and starts pounding her torso like that monkey did to his co-stars in Jordan Peele’s Nope.
EDWARD stops pounding Ruby and stares up at his shinny way up in the heavens above. He knows he has to climb a tall ladder to retrieve it, and he rolls outside the ring to get one. He slides it into the ring but then Ruby lays him out with a TOPE CON HERO!
Vinnie Lane: “EDWARD just got sent back to the stone age by Ruby!”
Bama: “Luckily his head is as hard as that concrete floor. He’ll be fine!”
Ruby wastes no time rolling back into the ring and setting up the ladder EDWARD introduced. She starts to climb but is overcome with the common wrestling curse of being unable to climb a ladder quickly all of a sudden. She seems just as confused by it as everyone else.
Halfway up, EDWARD is back in the ring and grabbing onto Ruby’s boot! Ruby tries to shake free, but EDWARD yanks Rubes off of the ladder and hits her with a jumping headbutt right to the face as she falls!
EDWARD snaps Ruby around the ring with various “suplexes,” definitely in quotes because they are more like just throws. He flings her up and down like a baby playing rough with its doll until he gets tired of it and just ragdolls Ruby into the turnbuckles repeatedly.
He drops Ruby in a pile in the corner and then crawls to the ladder, meekly looking up at it with tears in his eyes. He calls to his shinny but it doesn’t come to him, staying right where it’s been the entire time.
Vinnie Lane: “Poor EDWARD is terrified of heights!”
Bama: “Well gee whizz Vinnie maybe don’t book him in ladder matches!”
EDWARD starts lifting the ladder up and trying to poke and prod the belt free from its hanger, but to no avail.
Ruby flies off the corner and sends EDWARD spinning to the canvas with a poisoned Rubycanrana!
EDWARD is dizzy and rolls out of the ring… uh oh! Here come the Misfits!!!
Mastermind! Kris Von Bonn! Antony the Jerk! Scarlett the Hunteress! Melanie Childs! They run down to ringside and assault the Anarchy Champion!
They start beating on him, even as he tosses them off of his back one by one, they keep hopping back onto him.
And now EDWINA and EDWARD JUNIOR THE SECOND run down and try to even the odds… but it’s still five against three!
RUBY IN THE ROUGH ONTO MASTERMIND!!!
EDWARD and Ruby fight side by side to repel the Misfits, with EDWINA and EDWARD JUNIOR THE SECOND!
Mastermind is dusted and snoring after the RITR, and it doesn’t take long for Rubes and the EDWARD CLAN to send the rest of the Misfits packing!
Ruby tries to check on EDWARD, but he sees his own reflection in her shiny “pay per view” spandex… he flips out screeching and shoves Ruby into the ring steps!
Vinnie Lane: “Ruby helped EDWARD out, but she might cost herself the gold as a result!”
Bama: “It’s what have you done for me lately, Vinnie! The match ain’t over, EDWARD isn’t gonna just let Ruby take away his shinny!.”
EDWARD goes to the ladder as Ruby moans in pain on the steps. He starts to ascend!
HE TAKES A WHOLE STEP OFF THE MAT!!!
He starts sobbing in fear, but cameras zoom in and can clearly see him giving himself a pep talk. He knows this is the only way to get the shinny, and he HAS to get the shinny!
OH MY GOD HE TAKES ANOTHER STEP!
AND ANOTHER!!!
Vinnie Lane: “He’s doing it Bama! EDWARD is overcoming his greatest fear!”
Bama: “CLIMB TO YOUR DESTINY YOU BIG DUMB BEAUTIFUL BASTARD!”
EDWARD stuns the crowd by taking a fourth step up the ladder. He’s about halfway up! It looks like as long as he keeps his eyes squeezed very tightly closed and talks to himself the entire time, he can kinda sorta do this… just REALLY slowly!
EDWARD takes yet another step, and stretches to grab the belt… he’s so close! His weirdly long finger brushes the belt!!! HE’S GOT IT!!!
FLYING RUBY CUTTER!!!
Ruby leaped off of the top rope and grabbed EDWARD in the cutter on the way down, pulling him from the ladder to the mat!
EDWARD is motionless on the canvas and Ruby scampers up the ladder… halfway… all the way… RUBY STANDS ON TOP AND GRABS THE BELT! SHE’S WON THE ANARCHY TITLE!!!
DING! DING! DING!!!
Winner and NEW Anarchy Champion - Ruby
Vinnie Lane: “Say it with me, Bammer! FOUR TIME! FOUR TIME! FOUR TIME! FOUR! TIME! ANARCHY CHAMPION!”
Bama: “At the expense of a protohuman who can’t even COUNT to four!”
In the ring, Ruby drops to the mat with her new title and does the SPIN-A-RUBY!!!
We cut to the hallways backstage in the arena, where we see “The Mechanic” Peter Vaughn making his way through. There are automatic boos from the crowd, not that Vaughn can hear them. He is searching for a particular door, checking from right to left, until he finally comes to a stop in front of Buster Glove’s locker room.
Peter Vaughn: Here we go…
Vaughn seems to steel himself up, then knocks forcefully on the door. After a second, Gloves swings it open, glaring at the man he hates most right now.
Buster Gloves: You seriously have more balls than brains.
Peter Vaughn: Settle down, Buster. I’m not here to fight, not yet. I just want to give you one more chance to listen to reason…
Gloves, though, isn’t hearing it, as he launches himself forward with a right cross! Vaughn staggers back, then angrily comes back with a shot of his own, and suddenly the two men are brawling throughout the hallway!!
HHL: And the fight has already started between Buster and Peter!!
Pip: Someone call Finn, he’s missing out!
Security quickly rushes in, working to pull the two men apart. It’s not an easy task, but they finally manage it, pushing Vaughn further down the hall.
Peter Vaughn: You moron! You’re completely blowing this!
Buster Gloves: I’m going to skin you, you snake in the grass!
The guards work to get Gloves back into his locker room, not wanting this fight to be wasted. Vaughn, too, disappears down the hallway. The camera pans the other direction, showing Finn Kühn standing there. He gives an amused chuckle at the sight of what just happened, with Vaughn getting his just desserts.
Walking through the corridor to get ready for his match himself, he passes by the doorway to see the group of security guards trying their best to calm down the still raving-mad Bull of the North. Finn gives a small, two-fingered salute as the amused smile still hasn’t faded.
Finn Kühn: Hope you’re not trying to have him all to yourself, now. Be seeing you out there…
With that, he walks off as the three men involved know their match is coming.
The lights go out. The sounds of music and a snorting bull fill the arena as smoke rises from the stage. The lights return to the arena and Buster Gloves rises from the floor of the stage as the words "BUSTER GLOVES" play on the tron. "Burn", as played by Stabbing Westward, plays as blue and white lasers bounce around the arena
A black and blue training mask attached to his face, Buster scans the audience. You can’t see many of his facial features, but it’s undoubtedly him, the Bull of the North. He checks his chin, by giving it two short punches with a black padded glove on his left hand. The letters W.I.F.E. (Wrestling is Forever) printed on the backside of it.
Buster descends the ramp high fiving kids, pointing to the cheap seats up top, and bouncing his head to the music. He crawls up the ring steps like a silverback gorilla, wipes his shoes on the apron and ducks in under the top rope into the ring. Then side hops a circle around the ring before coming back to center. He removes his mask and checks his chin one more time as he poses for the hard cam.
The strong beat of Art of Blade begins to reverberate throughout the arena as the fans begin to get on their feet and cheer for who's about to come out. Before long, the sight of the King in Rags, Finn Kühn, comes out to a strong ovation. He looks out amidst the area, his kingdom for tonight as he smiles.
His pace as he comes down to the ring is slow, even and measured. As the commentators discuss amidst themselves about recent events and the upcoming match, Finn surveys the area one last time as he steps into the ring.
As Art of Blade reaches its chorus, Finn thrusts his arms up to the air, posing passionately for the fans as afterwards he settles into a game face, picking a corner and getting ready for what is to come.
The lights in the arena go out, causing the usual hysteria from the crowd. After a few seconds, Peter Vaughn's face appears on the big tron, darkly smirking down at the fans.
"This Time... It's Different."
After Vaughn finishes speaking, he begins to laugh. His laughter carries on as the Tron video overtakes his image, beginning with "This Time It's Different" by Evans Blue. Sparks begin to erupt around the stage, showering nearby fans who feel like they're a little too close to the action. As the fireworks die down, two figures appear through the smoke and haze. Peter Vaughn walks forward first, followed by Chronic Chris Page stays behind him, smiling at the reaction Vaughn is getting. They stop at the top of the ramp, surveying the hatred from the crowd. From Vaughn's reaction, you'd think they were chanting his name, as he walks down the aisle with a cocky smile, with Page departing for the back to get ready for his match.
That now only leaves Peter Vaughn... as he looks less than enthused about the ordeal as his cocky arrogance fades.
Buster and Finn are pacing in the ring now, looking over at ringside towards Peter Vaughn. Both of them are staring daggers right at the Mechanic, gesturing him to come into the ring. A nervous glint flashes in the eyes of Peter Vaughn, who is hesitant to step inside as he paces around ringside…
Pip: It’s a damn shame Peter Vaughn has been forced into this situation! It’s effectively a handicap match! No one should have to suffer the wrath that these two are about to put on him! Things wouldn’t be like this if Buster didn’t fall for Finn’s cheap manipulation tactics!
HHL: Forced into this situation?! Peter was the one behind getting this match booked in the first place! And he’s been the one manipulating Buster in particular throughout this entire time! He’s made his bed, and now he’s got to lie in it!
Pip: You are a horrible person for condoning this act of violence, Heather.
The referee leans through the ropes to the outside, pointing at Vaughn and motioning for him to get in there lest repercussions come on the spot. Vaughn growls, but realizes he’s got no other option. Trying his best to shake off the death stares between both Finn and Buster, he slowly makes his way up the ring stairs… onto the apron… slooooowly lifting a leg to come inside the ri-
AND FINN AND BUSTER BOTH MOVE TOWARDS HIM AT THE SAME TIME! THEY WANT A PIECE OF HIM RIGHT NOW!
Vaughn IMMEDIATELY retreats onto the apron again as the referee bolts right into the action, stepping right in between the three men and backing them up to opposing corners. Finn and Buster both sport scowls as they go back, and having to force themselves to break eye contact. Vaughn, realizing there are no more excuses, slowly gets into the ring.
HHL: Well… hopefully we can get this match started.
Pip: This is a fraud! A sham! Peter Vaughn deserves better than this!
With all three men inside now, the referee gets right down to business and rings the bell!
BUSTER GLOVES
- vs -
FINN KÜHN
- vs -
PETER VAUGHN
DING! DING! DING!
Finn’s gaze darts between Buster and Peter, trying to decide which man to immediately go on the attack now that the encounter has truly begun. Buster notices Finn looking around and nods his head to him, looking to get his attention. Finn notices, and the two men look to be discussing matters in the middle of the ring.
Pip: Look at this, Heather! They’re openly conspiring now! You can’t even try to pretend this is fair, now!
HHL: Isn’t this the same exact thing Peter Vaughn was planning on being able to do with Buster Gloves though before Finn revealed the truth?
Pip: Truth, smuth! Besides, that’s some really poor whataboutism on your end!
Peter Vaughn glues himself to his corner, prepared to try and fight and scratch and claw his way out of trouble if need be. He’s trying to formulate a plan inside of his head as Finn and Buster nod in agreement. Finn begins to walk forward and bring the punishment to Vaughn -
ONLY FOR BUSTER GLOVES TO HIT FINN WITH A TEEP KICK INTO THE MECHANIC!
PETER VAUGHN IMMEDIATELY CATCHES ONTO THIS AND HITS THE FALLING FINN WITH A KNEE THAT HITS RIGHT ON THE CHIN!
HHL: BUSTER OUT OF NOWHERE!
Pip: HA-HAH! See, Heather?! I TOLD you! There’s no way Buster Gloves would abandon the one friend who’s been looking out for him through thick and thin!
HHL: I’d beg to differ…
Peter Vaughn gets an incensed smile on his face as he sees Finn trying to stumble his way onto all fours after the surprise attack! He moves right in on the downed Finn, telling him to Get Out of My Ring with a dropkick that has Finn rolling out of the ring!
Pete quickly gets back right onto his feet right after, looking to Buster with the widest, cheesiest grin one can muster! His face looks like a real ball of sunshine as he goes into the middle of the ring, and brings his dear friend into a tight hug!
Pip: Look at this, Heather! Two friends reuniting once more! Peter Vaughn’s attempt to reach out worked in the end after all!
HHL: It looks like you might be right after all. I just hope Buster Gloves knows what he’s doing…
Buster Gloves raises his arms, leaning into the hug and clapping Peter Vaughn hard on the back…
…
…
…
ONLY FOR BUSTER GLOVES TO THROW PETER VAUGHN OVER WITH A JUDO HIP TOSS!
Pip: NO, BUSTER! NOOOOO!
HHL: He DID know this entire time! It’s every man for himself in a Triple Threat match! Both Finn AND Vaughn took the bait and then some here!
Vaughn’s face turns red and irate as he frustratedly slaps the mat while bringing himself up. Turning around to face Buster, he’s already on the warpath as he steps to face him. Vaughn wastes no time though in getting right back onto his feet, bringing Buster into a collar-and-elbow tie-up!
Buster IMMEDIATELY uses his size and strength to his advantage, bringing a harsh knee to Vaughn’s gut! But Vaughn manages to right himself quickly, responding by stomping HARD on Buster’s foot! That has Buster trying to shake out the pain, allowing Vaughn to grab onto the arm and initiate a standing keylock.
Buster’s brow furrows in anger and irritation, and he brings his free arm up to engage the keylock! Forcefully prying Vaughn’s grip open, Buster manages to grab onto Vaughn’s wrists and starts reversing the pressure and strength! He starts beginning to plant him onto the ground, and Vaughn has no choice as his entire body is being moved by Buster!
Both shoulders are down! The referee begins to count!
ONE!
TWO!
KICKOUT! Vaughn bridges and raises a shoulder in the process to break the count!
HHL: Peter Vaughn is outmatched in a contest of strength here. If he’s got a plan to turn the tides, he’s going to need to enact that soon…
Pip: Hah! Please! Vaughn’s got plans for his plans and then some! Buster is in for a rude awakening!
Showing impressive core and body strength, Vaughn raises his feet onto Buster’s torso! Trying to use every ounce of his own power, he begins to pull up! Buster is taken by surprise, and Vaughn utilizes his positioning to bring Buster into the air using his feet!
VAUGHN FLIPS BUSTER OVER ONTO HIS BACK WITH A MONKEY FLIP!
The two turn onto their bellies at the same time, looking to get right back onto their feet. Vaughn looks to be just a hair faster, and looks to be grappling Buster so he can continue the offense - BUSTER CHARGES UP WITH A HEADBUTT BETWEEN THE EYES!
Pip: OH! That impact was sickening! Is Vaughn okay?!
HHL: That might have hurt Buster as much as it did Vaughn, there.
Buster shakes out the cobwebs he gave himself as he looks at Pete, who has a palm pressed to his forehead. Seizing the opportunity in front of him, Buster gives Pete a kick to the gut, doubling him over… Buster then proceeds to lift him into the air, hitting a BRAAAAAAAAAAINBUSTER!
Quick cover now by Buster!
ONE!
TWO!
FLYING ELBOW FROM FINN KÜHN BREAKS THE PIN UP!
HHL: Finn coming out of nowhere just saved this match from having an early ending!
Pip: Leave it to Finn to want all the glory for himself! He’d NEVER let Buster try and have this moment to enjoy a win!
HHL: You’re drunk on Vaughn’s Kool-Aid, aren’t you?
Pip: You mean the truth, Heather?
Finn quickly darts right back up onto his feet as Vaughn rolls out of the ring, leaving both Finn and Buster to stare down at each other. Buster tries to go in for a right hand, but Finn deflects it and nails Buster with a snap elbow! And another! And another!
Buster manages to try withstanding the barrage of elbows coming at him, instead rocking Finn with his OWN elbow that sends the King in Rags back! Buster tries lunging in towards Finn now looking for a punch, but Finn grabs the arm! He wrenches it, moving along with it, before grounding Buster with a Dragon Screw Arm Whip!
Buster hisses from the pain in his arm, but Finn goes to capitalize with targeting Buster’s arm still and going to lock in a Kimura Lock! The pain is starting to intensify already as Finn tries locking in the hold, but Buster moves his arm back and forth to deny the hold! It’s proving to be a slippery target!
Finn grits his teeth and FINALLY manages to get the arm still, but desperate times call for desperate measures! Buster gets his thumb ready and JAMS IT RIGHT UP FINN’S BACKSIDE?!?!
HHL: WHAT DID BUSTER JUST DO?!
Pip: HAH! That’s called ‘checking your oil,’ Heather! That was a unique counter, alright!
HHL: ‘Unique’ is certainly a way to try and spin that sort of thing…
‘Unique’ or no, the thumb does its job and then some as Finn quickly moves off of Buster, rubbing his poor backside. Buster manages to get back up onto his feet, and he quickly goes in! A hard right hand knocks Finn right on the cheek! And a left jab on the nose! And ANOTHER headbutt busts Finn’s lip as he leans on the nearby ropes for support!
Buster Gloves seizes his opportunity, bouncing off of the opposing ropes with a full head of steam! He’s moving towards Finn like a freight train, getting himself ready for a lariat - BUT FINN PULLS THE TOP ROPE DOWN! FINN’S BODY LOOKS TO BE PUSHING BUSTER ON THE WAY DOWN AS HE SPILLS OUT TO THE FLOOR NEARBY! Peter Vaughn is right next to him and also looking to be getting back onto his feet!
Finn looks at Buster and Pete on the outside. He looks to the fans. They cheer wildly for him as he nods! He hits the opposite set of ropes himself! Pete and Buster manage to get back onto their feet and recognize what’s going on! They both brace themselves and try turning away in order to shield themselves for a SUICIDE DIVE!
…
BUT IT WAS A FAKE! Finn flipped onto the ropes with an acrobatic flourish, landing onto the apron instead! He checks both sides of himself to check his distance, before hopping onto the ropes… ASAI MOONSAULT!
AND PETER VAUGHN RECOGNIZED WHAT WAS HAPPENING IN THE NICK OF TIME, PULLING BUSTER RIGHT INTO THE LINE OF FIRE AS BOTH FINN AND BUSTER GET WIPED OUT!
Pip: There’s that wily instinct from Peter Vaughn! Finn thought he could take out both men at once, but he paid the price for thinking that!
HHL: What, you’re not going to knock Vaughn for throwing Buster into the line of fire despite supposedly being friends?
Pip: Why would I?! Buster has shown time and again he won’t listen to Vaughn, no matter what his true friend does to reach out to him. Vaughn’s just looking out for number one!
HHL: …I don’t believe you, sometimes, Pip.
Pip: Believe the truth, Heather! That’s all you can trust!
Speaking of the truth… Peter Vaughn lets loose a sigh and smile of relief as he sees both Finn and Buster laid out, having his eyes on the announce table and begins staggering his way over towards them. Making his way there unannounced, he slips on the third set of headphones present there.
Pip: PETE! Buddy, glad to see you here and well. What can we do for you?
Peter Vaughn: Well Pip, I just… hah… I want to go ahead and find out the truth of what happened, here. You saw what happened, didn’t you? When Buster Gloves got sent over the top rope, you saw Finn pushing into him! He jabbed a thumb right into his eye!
Pip: He did WHAT?! That villain!
HHL: You are kidding me right about now.
Peter Vaughn: Of course I’m not, Heather! I’m exposing this fraud Finn for a second time over! C’mon, production crew! Play that footage!
A slight delay takes place as a replay fills the screen…
Earlier in the Match Said:Buster Gloves seizes his opportunity, bouncing off of the opposing ropes with a full head of steam! He’s moving towards Finn like a freight train, getting himself ready for a lariat - BUT FINN PULLS THE TOP ROPE DOWN! And as Buster falls onto the apron and the floor below, in slow motion, it looks like Finn is bringing his forearm against Buster’s torso, trying to push him away and ensure a rough landing…
HHL: That looks more like Finn using the most of his position and get more damage on Buster! Where do you see a thumb to the eye there?!
Peter Vaughn: Gah, you can’t… you can’t see anything from this angle! We need another view, because I know what I sa-
Pip: LOOK OUT, PETE!
BUSTER GLOVES COMES RIGHT INTO VIEW, THROWING FINN KÜHN OVER THE ANNOUNCE DESK AND RIGHT INTO PETER VAUGHN! THE TWO GO FLYING INTO THE NEARBY BARRICADE!
Pip: NO! MY NOTES!
HHL: I’m just thankful neither of us got hurt after seeing Finn being thrown like that…
Finn starts crawling away, trying to gasp for air and leaning over near the fans for support. Buster, however, makes a beeline for Vaughn and throws plenty of stiff right hands onto his prone body. His punches pulverize his body, and Vaughn’s guard he throws up gets broken through.
Pip: C’mon, Vaughn! Fight back! FIGHT BACK!
HHL: I don’t think there’s much he can do, here…
Vaughn tries to shift his weight and push Buster off of him to create some breathing room! He manages to do so, but it’s only a successful strategy for a second as Buster comes right back in, plucking Vaughn up by the wrist and bringing him into the air like a ragdoll!
The fans pop wildly as Buster picks up Vaughn and places him on his shoulders in an inverted Fireman’s Carry! A smile comes onto Buster’s face as he marches over towards the announcer’s table, and the crowd goes even crazier as they recognize what’s about to happen-
HHL: GET BACK, PIP!
WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM!
PETER VAUGHN JUST GOT SENT RIGHT THROUGH THE ANNOUNCER’S TABLE WITH THE OBLITERATOR! THE BURNING HAMMER DAMN NEAR BROKE PETER VAUGHN’S BODY IN HALF!
…
Static fills your ears for a moment. In the background, you see both Heather and Pip reacting wildly, but nothing they say is getting picked up by their mics. They seem to catch onto this fact, and as Buster rolls Vaughn off of the wreckage, Pip trots up to what remains of the announce table, going into the debris and fiddling with one of the wires.
After a moment…
HHL: -lo? Can you guys hear us?
Pip: I think we’re good now, Heather!
Wiping the sweat off of his face, a look of triumph and satisfaction crosses Buster Gloves’ face as Peter Vaughn looks to be well and truly out of it.
Pip: Look at Buster Gloves’ sick grin! He just destroyed XWF property and he’s proud of it! How can you do this to your friend?!
HHL: Well, be that as it may… this isn’t a no-disqualification match! Buster NEEDS to get Vaughn into those ropes if he’s going to get the pinfall!
Pip: As much as I hate to say it… he damn well might.
Buster goes to grab Vaughn up to his feet so he can roll him inside once more… only to be nailed in the face by a PINEAPPLE?!
BUSTER GETS FLOORED BY THE SHOT! He looks over to the source of it to see Finn standing there, in the aftermath of a throwing motion as he’s right next to the crowd, with his own mischievous grin settling onto his face!
Buster tries to get back onto his feet, but Finn darts in and nails the kneeling Buster with a headshot dropkick that he calls ‘CROWNED’! Buster drops to the outside mats, eyes almost slightly glazed over now. Finn takes the pineapple and sets it right onto Buster’s face before… DOUBLE FOOT STOMP ONTO THE BULL OF THE NORTH’S FACE BUSTS THE PINEAPPLE!
HHL: It’s a shame to see such a wonderful fruit go to waste… but what a callback to their clash in Hawaii, eh, Pip?
Pip: Talk about a ‘food fight’...
Now it’s Finn’s turn to be the only man up and moving. He knows this is his golden chance to get a pin, and he looks over to where Vaughn just was a moment ago. He expects him to still be completely out of it, but instead, he sees him…
…desperately crawling away?
HHL: Peter Vaughn is trying to head to the backstage area! He’s tucking his tail in between his legs!
Pip: Can you blame him?! I sure can’t!
Pete manages to get back onto both feet and staggers away as Finn is in hot pursuit after him! Both men are winded and exhausted, but Pete is trying to save his skin at this moment while Finn is trying to take this chance to get his own punishment onto the man who wronged him and besmirched his name!
The two are walking up the entrance ramp, and Finn is rapidly gaining on Pete! He reaches his arm, trying to grab the Mechanic…
NO! Peter Vaughn aims behind him, throwing a sharp side kick that doubles Finn over! The King in Rags wheezes and tries to bring himself up and straight again… but he gets no time to do so! Vaughn grabs Finn by the wrist, and out of nowhere… IRISH WHIP INTO THE NEARBY BARRICADE!
Finn’s body twists and contorts into the unforgiving steel, and he groans in agony! Now with enough of a head start to move, Vaughn goes right off of the ramp and to the nearby curtains, trying to bring himself far into the backstage area!
HHL: Where could he even be going to?!
Pip: At this rate - ANYWHERE but here!
Vaughn brings himself into the backstage area, with a twisted labyrinth of corridors and halls awaiting him. He huffs, puffs, and fumes as he tries to calm himself down with a deep breath.
Peter Vaughn: “Where to… where to…”
He stalks down one of the nearby halls, moving intently as he knows he only has so long to himself. As he paces down the corridor he’s in, though, he sees a familiar sight - with perfectly tanned body, long, flowing black hair and that chiseled six-pack - it’s Little Feather!
Little Feather: Petey! I hope you’re not getting into any trouble back here…
Vaughn scoffs at Little Feather, clearly uninterested in talking to him for long given his role in aiding the ‘liar’ Finn. He shoves him aside, continuing to stagger his way through the sterile lights as a fuming pair of footsteps behind him grab his attention. Vaughn looks over his shoulder, and makes a mistake as FINN KÜHN TACKLES HIM FROM BEHIND!
FISTS COME FLYING DOWN AS VAUGHN HAS TO COVER UP! AND THE KNEES RAIN DOWN ONTO HIS TEMPLE, DRAWING BLOOD NOW! VAUGHN IS IN A VERY BAD WAY, AND RAKES FINN’S EYES TO STOP HIS OFFENSIVE!
Finn grunts in agony, rubbing at his poor eyes. Vaughn takes this opportunity to bring himself onto one knee, but that’s the opportunity Finn was looking for! He runs in, having one move in mind for this very moment, and that’s none other than his BREAKER SOLO-!
BUT PETER VAUGHN MOVES OUT OF THE WAY AT THE LAST MOMENT! Finn’s foot hits the floor and he lands in an awkward fashion, sucking in air through his teeth as he didn’t anticipate the last-second counter! He manages to sit back up, only to eat a DROPKICK to the face!
With Finn now grounded, Vaughn takes this chance to wipe the blood out of his eyes, and finds a nearby supply closet! He goes in there - AND LOCKS HIMSELF INSIDE!
HHL: What is Peter Vaughn DOING?! This is insane, even for him!
Pip: Is it, Heather? He’s protecting himself! Besides, you can’t be pinned if they can’t get to you period!
HHL: Who knows how long this strategy is going to manage to work out for him…
Finn manages to bring himself back up onto his feet after a while, shaking out the cobwebs as he does so. He notices the now-shut supply closet, putting two and two together and figuring out that Peter Vaughn has locked himself inside!
Grunting, Finn slams his fist against the solid wood as he tries shouting inside!
Finn Kühn: Open up, Peter! You can’t get away from me for long!
Peter Vaughn does not respond. Finn shakes his head in disgust, and goes to force the handle open! It doesn’t budge though, no matter what level of strength he puts into it! He tries to look around to look for a different strategy - ONLY TO HAVE HIS HEAD BASHED INTO THE WOOD FROM BEHIND!
FINN IS GROGGY AND LOOPY AS THAT ATTACK CAME FROM OUT OF NOWHERE! AND IT PROVIDES BUSTER GLOVES AMPLE OPPORTUNITY TO SCOOP UP THE KING IN RAGS AND HIT HIM WITH THE BUUUUUUUUUUUUUULLS EYE! THE KING IN RAGS FLIES THROUGH THE AIR AND GETS PLANTED RIGHT ONTO THE UNFORGIVING CONCRETE!
Buster nods his head as Finn is OUT of it! He goes to pick Finn up, but instead of fighting back, Finn just points right to the closed supply closet door! Buster’s gaze follows along, and he realizes just who’s inside now.
HHL: Is Finn trying to call for a truce to try dealing with Peter Vaughn?
Pip: Of COURSE Finn calls for a truce after he gets nailed with that German! Because he knows that if they were in the ring and didn’t have to deal with Peter Vaughn, this match would be well on its way to being over and done with!
Finn takes his time trying to rest and recover, and in the meantime, Buster seems to have come to an understanding with him, and instead brings his attention to Vaughn behind the closet door.
Buster Gloves: I’m gonna rip you out of the grass, snake! Open up and make this easy on the both of us!
Peter Vaughn still does not respond. Buster Gloves sighs and shakes his head, before moving in and giving a FIERCE kick to the door!
WHAM!
The door shudders and shakes, but does not go down after the fierce kick. Buster shakes his head, and turns around to see Finn dragging himself up. Buster shakes his head, and Finn grumbles underneath his breath. The two look around, trying to find something to use… and Finn sees a nearby ladder!
Finn Kühn: Hey, over here!
Buster notices the ladder now too, and nods in agreement! They quickly bring the ladder over, and they grab on to opposite ends of the weapon as the wooden door is in their sights!
Pip: They can’t be about to do this! They’re going to open a hole in that door!
HHL: This wouldn’t be an issue if Peter Vaughn would decide that maybe he’d participate in the match that HE set up in the first place!
Finn Kühn: Okay, on three… One…
Buster Gloves: Two…
Finn Kühn and Buster Gloves: THREE!
BOTH FINN AND BUSTER CHARGE FORWARD WITH THE LADDER, AND THE DOOR COMES EVER CLOSER!
BUT AT THE LAST MINUTE, THE DOOR OPENS UP FROM THE INSIDE! THE TWO OF THEM CAN’T STOP THEMSELVES FROM CONTINUING TO MOVE, AND THE LADDER CLANGS HARSHLY AGAINST THE BACK WALL AS THEIR ARMS FEEL THE IMPACT!
And at that moment… two bottles of Windex come into view!
Buster Gloves: GAH!
Finn Kühn: FUCK!
The ladder falls to the floor as Finn and Buster both rub their eyes! Peter Vaughn takes advantage of the situation yet again as he throws the Windex bottles right at Finn! And for Buster… he chucks a mop bucket at him that’s full of… SNAKES?! The two of them take a tumble to the floor as Vaughn is on the move yet again!
HHL: Where did Peter Vaughn get snakes from?! Did he anticipate this scenario this entire time, and wanted to play more mind games with Buster Gloves?!
Pip: Looks like it, Heather, ha-HAAAAAAAAAH! That’s the way, Vaughn! Keep them guessing!
HHL: Pip, I never want to hear you question me on maintaining journalistic integrity and impartiality ever again on this match after… all this.
Pip: That’s fine, Heather! Because I know that right now, I’m standing up for a true hero, one who exposes the frauds and corrupt ‘heroes’ this company features on a pedestal!
Vaughn quickly scurries out of the line of fire, but he can hear that Buster and Finn aren’t staying down for long! Vaughn makes a quick, last-second decision and turns down another corridor, but he realizes at the last moment that this is the way back to the ring! He goes to turn back, but he can’t! Buster and Finn are hot on his tail!
With no options, Vaughn comes out from backstage, running towards the ring as the fans whoop and holler wildly, knowing they’re seeing him get his! The fright on his face is something to be remembered as he rolls into the ring, and at that moment, coming from backstage is none other than Buster and Finn!
Finn has the lead on Buster in terms of speed, but that isn’t going to last long! For the second time tonight, Finn gets grabbed out of nowhere and gets thrown right into the nearby barricade! This time though, he goes up and over right into the fans, ensuring that right now, Buster’s going to have Vaughn all to himself!
HHL: Here we go! No escape for Peter Vaughn as Buster Gloves heads right into the ring! Buster’s going to make Peter answer for his crimes, right here, right now!
Pip: C’mon, Pete! You can do this! Stay calm and make him see reason!
Peter Vaughn doesn’t even GET that chance, though! He outstretches his arms, trying to reach out to Buster Gloves, but it’s all in vain as Buster Gloves runs in and nails Peter Vaughn with a HEAAAAAAAAAART PUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNCH!
HHL: HEARTBREAKER! The same move Buster Gloves used on Finn Kühn all those weeks back after the doctored video was shown comes right back around to nail Peter right in the chest!
And to add a bit of extra pizazz onto the whole ordeal, Buster’s fist coils right around Peter’s janitor uniform - right onto the CCPE patch shown! AND BUSTER GLOVES RIPS IT RIGHT OFF OF PETER VAUGHN’S UNIFORM!
Pip: Now THAT’S just uncalled for!
Vaughn weakly gasps out in realization and surprise at what happens as Buster chucks the patch out into the crowd! He doesn’t waste another second there, grabbing Vaughn by the back of the neck and bringing him in close as -
KNEE!
KNEE!
KNEE!
KNEE!
KNEE!
KNEE!
KNEE!
KNEE!
KNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
HHL: THE RICHMOND KNEE PARTY! Finn showed off just how damaging those knees can be on Peter Vaughn when he busted him wide open, and right now that cut is only getting worse on Vaughn’s skull!
Pip: What brutality…
Vaughn slumps to the ground, clearly out of it. Buster looks at Vaughn, and he realizes he wants to make a statement with this win. After everything that’s happened… after all that’s been done to him… he wants to make sure this victory is guaranteed!
And THAT’S what leads Buster Gloves to climb up to the top turnbuckle as the fans chant for him!
Pip: Uhhh… yeah, HERE’S a new one, Heather! Have you ever seen Buster Gloves climb to the top turnbuckle like this?!
HHL: Can’t say that I have, at least that I remember! If this move hits on Vaughn, this is game, set and match for Buster!
Buster’s eyes narrow as he looks at Vaughn, his stance and position wobbly as he makes sure his sights are lined up properly…
…
…
…
…
BUT FINN HOPS ONTO THE APRON AT THE LAST MOMENT AND HITS THE ROPES TO MAKE BUSTER CROTCH HIMSELF ON THE TOP TURNBUCKLE!
HHL: Desperation strategy by Finn! No rules means nothing stopping him here, and now it’s Buster’s turn to be surprised!
Pip: I’m sure Buster must be thinking that Finn is just so swell right about now…
Finn manages to drag himself onto his feet, scaling to the top turnbuckle where Buster is and grabs the targeted arm from earlier! There’s a bit of a scuffle on top between the two, vying for position, but Finn hits a back elbow! And another! And another! And ANOTHER!
He’s got the arm locked on tight now! Worry flashes into Buster’s eyes as Finn moves-
…
…
…
HHL: THE SAVAGERY OF ANGELS FROM THE TOP ROPE?!
Pip: WHAT THE HELL?!
IT’S LOCKED! IT’S LOCKED IN! THE TWO HIT THE MAT ROUGH AS FINN WRENCHES! HE WRENCHES BACK ON THE HOLD WITH EVERY FIBER OF HIS BEING!
THE FANS ARE SPLIT! MANY ARE BACKING FINN AND CHANT FOR BUSTER TO TAP! BUT MANY ARE ALSO BACKING BUSTER AND TRY TELLING HIM TO HANG IN THERE! IT’S A BATTLE OF WILLS! A CLASH OF SPIRITS! WILL BUSTER TAP OUT TO THE HOLD THAT VAUGHN SAID THERE WAS NO GETTING OUT OF THERE FOR HIM?!
FINN BRIDGES IN HIS HOLD! HIS POSITIONING IS TOO IRON-TIGHT! THERE IS NO SITTING UP TO BREAK THE HOLD HERE! IT’S EITHER TAP OR SNAP NOW!
AND
YET
BUSTER
IS
STILL
SURVIVING!
HHL: WHAT IS IT GOING TO TAKE FOR BUSTER TO LOSE?!
Pip: THAT STREAK IS GOING TO RUN OUT SOONER OR LATER!
FINN…
FINN…
FINN BREAKS HIS OWN HOLD! HE GRABS BUSTER BY THE WRISTS THOUGH, PULLING HIM ONTO HIS KNEES-
F
A
T
A
L
I
S
M
!
HHL: FINN HIT IT! HE DROVE HIS KNEE RIGHT INTO BUSTER GLOVES’ FACE! THIS IS THE OPENING HE NEEDS!
Pip: HE’S GOING TO STEAL THIS DAMN VICTORY!
With a victorious grin on his face, Finn falls into the pinfall!
…
BUT HE CAN’T COVER BUSTER IN TIME AS PETER VAUGHN HITS HIM WITH A LOW BLOW FROM BEHIND!
HHL: NO!
Pip: OH, YES!
FINN HOLDS ONTO HIS MINI-KINGS IN HORROR AND AGONY, NOT HAVING EXPECTED THAT IN THE SLIGHTEST! WITH THE LAST BURST OF HIS ENERGY, PETER VAUGHN PULLS FINN RIGHT BACK INTO THE MIDDLE OF THE RING-
REEEEEEEEEEVEEEEEEEEEEEENGED!
FINN HITS THE MAT RIGHT ON THE BAD NECK! PETER’S SHIT-EATING GRIN COMES ONTO FULL DISPLAY AS HE COVERS FINN RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW!
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONE!
TWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
THREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
WINNER - PETER VAUGHN!
Pip: HAHAHAHA! HE DID IT! HE DID IT, HEATHER! OVERCOMING ALL THE ODDS, PETER VAUGHN WON THIS HANDICAP MATCH!
HHL: I don’t think you can call this a handicap match in the slightest, Pip… But I’ll give credit where credit’s due. Pete can now effectively put Finn behind him, at least for now… but I think there’s still some unfinished business with Buster Gloves. There’s James Raven’s list after all, remember?
Pip: Yeah, yeah… well, guess what? You can watch Pete win again… come WGWF Brawl against Buster!
The honeyed rasp of Atara's voice blares over the facility's PA in unison with those words appearing on the multitude of screens and displays littering the arena.
HELLO DOVES
The crowd pops and gets to their feet shouting in near total unison a single word.
OPA!
Arena lights start to pulse in time with the music and multiple vertical streams of pyro erupt across the front of stage. Strutting with purpose Atara emerges from the back taking spot centerstage atop the ramp. Posing for the camera, a wink and kiss is given to the viewers at home.
Grunge walking to the ringsteps, she climbs and stops at the top to posture again for her adoring public. Hand on her hip, the Grecian moves to the middle of the apron to blows a final kiss to the camera and enters the ring through the middle rope.
The entire arena slowly fades to black as the audience excitedly awaits the entrance of "The Peoples GOAT". The drum beat and guitar solo start and a series of white and blue spotlights come up and pan the crowd. Mike Shinodas voice is heard on the speakers singing.
“Now here we go for the hundredth time, hand grenade pins in every line, throw ‘em up and let something shine, going out of my fucking mind… filthy mouth, no excuse, find a new place to hang this noose, string me up from atop these roofs, high and tight so I wont get loose.”
By now the fans are going wild and cheering as the spotlights slowly make their way to the top of the entrance ramp where a dim fog begins to form.
“Truth is you can stop and stare, rub myself out and no one cares, dug the trench out and lay down there with a shovel up, out of reach somewhere… yeah, someone pouring in, make it a dirt glass floor again, say your prayers and stomp it out when they bring that chorus in.”
The spotlights come together as one, and the fog fills the top of the ramp until the downbeat hits and a major blue and silver pyrotechnic display goes off and the rest of the arena lights turn up to full. When the smoke clears James Raven is seen on top of the ramp, his hands thrown up over his head and a huge smile on his face.
“I BLEED IT OUT!!! Diggin’ deeper just to throw it away, I BLEED IT OUT!!!”
James makes his way down the ramp, high fiving fans and posing for pictures with several of them until he reaches the base of the ramp. Then, he pauses for a few seconds and sprints for the ring, diving in under the bottom rope and sliding in to the center of the mat on his hands and knees. He poses for a second, then gets up and runs for the turnbuckle, climbing up and posing yet again for the fans before doing a 360 degree spin off and doing the same on the opposite turnbuckle. As his music fades out he stretches in his corner, and then waits for either his opponents entrance or the starting bell.
EYES
ON
VAUGHNEMOUS
NO, I WON'T GIVE IN, I WON'T GIVE IN
TILL' I'M VICTORIOUS
AND I WILL DEFEND
I WILL DEFEND
The lights in arena turn into an explosion of pinks, purples, greens, rainbows, unicorns on fire, lucky charms, rivers of sugar, and mountains of Meow Mix Ocean Explosion tuna treats as Angelica Vaughn walks out onto the ramp. She pauses with her hands on her hips, letting her cape sway gently, and gives her opposite coast home crowd a wide smile. Behind her, a blur of black and red speeds forward and under her arms as Sarah Lacklan slides in front of her and matches her pose, her head nearly a full foot under Angie's. Sarah tilts her head way wayway back and up and flashes her Billion $$$ Smile, and the two wink at each other. Angie then takes her hands off her hips and pushes Sarah forward, making the former Universal Champion squawk in wide-eyed surprise, before the two make their way down the aisle.
Halfway there, Angie slows to a stop, her face turning slack, with her jaw falling to her chin. Ahead of her, Sarah sighs and rolls her eyes before backing up to Angie and, with a gentle firmness, pulling her away from that Cute Boy she had noticed sitting in an aisle seat. Angie looks longingly at the verified Cute Boy while Sarah shakes her head.
Once at ringside, Sarah slides into the ring underneath the ropes as Angie climbs the steps. Sarah gets to her feet and pulls down the top rope with all her weight, allowing Angie to step over the top rope like the most giant of giant wrestlers. As Angie walks to the center of the ring and stands with her hands on her hips, Sarah takes a microphone from Tigs and gives her a big wink.
SARAH:Hello, everyone! My name is Sarah Lacklan-
The crowd, dutifully, responds with the sound of a trumpet’s fanfare.
SARAH:World’s Greatest Life Coach and I am here to introduce to you the very FIRST member of the Family First of the XWF and my absolute (non-spouse) #RideOrDie. She is standing at the eternally totes-too-tall height of five feet and eleven inches...
CROWD: BAY-BAY
SARAH:...and weighing in today at about...oh...I'd say about thirteen or fourteen well-fed kitties...and because she likes dumb, useless, God-awful farm chores-
Sarah shutters in disgust.
SARAH:-she is fighting out of the Supes Totes Amaze Ranch in Texas...she is the Leggy Blonde of Legend…President of the Deborah Hodge Fan Club…the FUN-raiser of the XWF...the Vaughnemous A.N.G…
The crowd waits patiently as Sarah takes a deep breath.
SARAH:ANGELICAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Angie raises her hands into the air as a bedazzled spotlight shines down on her.
SARAH:VAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUGHNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN
The crowd breaks out into a chant as Angie leads them with pumps of her arms.
PC: "And we're off to the races! J-M-J Jr and James Raven take the starts for their teams!"
HHL: "This is a huge matchup to start off with! James and Jr are on two opposite ends of the professional wrestling spectrum. One is a certifeid legend, and one is a fresh rookie jut getting his feet wet!"
PC: "Let's see if he can wet those feet with some Raven blood!"
Raven and JMJ circle each other around the ring for a few moments, both men looking for signs of weakness in the other. James Raven stands about two inches taller, but he does have slightly less muscle definition than ol' Jr. Unperturbed by this fact, James Raven launches ahead first, trying to tie up with JMJ! James Raven locks in a clinch before he starts passing JMJ back against the ropes. JMJ tries his best to resist, but Raven is a master of the grapple positioning and is slowly but surely backing his opponent up. Eventually JMJ's backside meets the ropes, and the two wrestlers just kinda stay there, locked up in the clinch, with James Raven having the slight advantage.
HHL: "Well this is....admittedly a little boring."
PC: "We're looking for fireworks, not hugging! Come on guys!"
James Raven somewhat lazily holds JMJ Jr against the ropes for quite some time, and after a while JMJ Jr simply stops resisting. The crowd lets this happen for a little while before the boos start raining down.
PC: "It doesn't look like either of these competitors is trying particularly hard in this match..."
HHL: "Looks can, um, be deceiving?"
The flow of boos seems to irritate James Raven, because he eventually just lets JMJ Jr go. JMJ looks slightly surprised by this turn of events, but he simply dusts some dirt off his shoulder as he walks back to Angie Vaughn. Both men tag in their female partners, and then the action really gets underway!
[white]PC: "And here come the ladies!"
HHL: "Now the action is going to pick up for sure!"
As JMJ and James Raven take their spots on the apron outside the ring, Atara and Angie immediately charge to the middle of the ring and began trading crazy haymakers! Atara hits a huge right hand, but Angie Vaughn responds back with a massive uppercut: and so on and so forth! The two women look like barbarians duking it out inside of a god damned telephone booth! Someone's tooth goes flying, but you're not quite sure who's tooth it was! The referee looks on in supreme discomfort as Atara and Angie keep beating each other in the face with absolutey no remorse or hesitation. Within moments, both women have double shiners and bruised lips.
PC: "Holy crap, what a change of pace in the action!"
HHL: "Angie and Atara know how important this match is, and they're giving it their all!"
PC: "Are you saying their partners didn't?"
HHL: "......"
Eventually, Angelica Vaughn gains the upperhand with a surprising round of Muay Thai Knees to the legs of Atara! Atara forcibly collapses down to one knee, and that's when Angelica Vaughn senses a hell of an opportunity. Angie bounces back against the ropes as Atara knelt on the mat, and as Vaughn comes back to Raven she leaves her feet and slams into her jaw with a running dropkick! Atara drops to her back and Vaughn is immediately on her for the pinfall attempt.
1!
2-NO! KICKOUT!
HHL: "Atara doesn't go down easy!"
PC: "That's not what I've heard from the boys in the back!"
HHL: "HEY!"
Regardless of the patriarchal commentary from Pip, Atara is able to get a very quick shoulder up off the mat. Atara pushes Angie off of her with the quickness before scrambling to her feet. Atara quickly positions herself in a defensive stance, meaning she was more than prepared for Angelica Vaughn to come right back at her with a double axe handle! A prepared Atara bats the axe handle away with her forearms before stiffly kicking Vaughn in the stoamch, forcing the tag team champion to bend over in pain.
Atara sees the opportunity and drops to the ground in front of Angie Vaughn before hitting her with a massive uppercut!
PC: "What a move from Atara!"
HHL: "There's a reason many people consider the Ravens to be the favorites in this match, Pip!"
The force of the uppercut sends blood squirting out of Angie's nose as she is forced to step back towards the ropes. Atara scrambles back up to her feet as Angie Vaughn is forced by the ropes to head back to the center of the ring. As Angie nears Atara, the female Raven picks Angie up before bringing her down to the ground with a major scoop powerslam! JMJ cringes in sympathy as the mat shakes from the force of the maneuver. Atara hooks Angie's leg and goes for the quick pin.
1!
2!!
KICKOUT!
PC: "This match isn't over yet!"
HHL: "But Atara is doing everything SHE can to get her team the win here tonight!"
With JMJ Jr screaming at her from the corner, Angie Vaughn is able to kick her way out of the pinfall attempt. Atara slams the mat in frustration before picking Angie up by the hair and forcing her to a standing position. Atara looks over at James for some encouragement before she drops Angie back down to the mat with a brainbusting DDT! Once again, Atara flips Angie over and hooks her leg for the cover! Instead of heading into the ring to break up the pin, however, JMJ is too busy checking his phone! He doesn't even see the action happening inside the ring!
1!
2!!
KICKOUT!
Somehow Angie Vaughn gets another shoulder up, causing even more frustration for Atara. Atara slaps Angie in the face a few good times before grabbing her by the hair once more. Angie tries to break free, but Atara hits her with an elbow to the ribcage that immediately puts a stop to her resistance. Then, Atara Irish Whips Angelica Vaughn into the corner with James Raven! Both James and Atara are smiling wildly as JMJ Jr is now taking a phonecall over in the other corner.
PC: "They're going to play some 2-on-1 here!"
HHL: "This can't be good for Vaughn!"
Atara tags in James Raven and the two take turns kicking Angie in the stomach until the referee threatens to DQ them. Then, James and Atara work together to pull Angie out of the corner before hitting her with a double DDT! Atara quickly scrambles to her feet before she spears a distracted JMJ Jr through the ropes, making it impossible for him to break up any pinfall attempts!
PC: "And down goes Angie!"
HHL: "And down goes Madison!"
James Raven sports a cocky smirk before pinning Angie Vaughn. The referee hops down to count.
1!
2!!
KICKOUT!!!
HHL: "She got her shoulder up!"
PC: "Angelica Vaughn is single-handedly carrying this tag team division right now!"
James just shrugs as Angie Vaughn manages to kick out from the double move. James pulls himself to his feet and starts playing to the crowd as he waits for Angie Vaughn to join him.
PC: "Wait a second....I think James Raven is setting up the The F.Y.S. (Fuck You Shank)!"
HHL: "This will end the match right here!"
The fans all clap along as James Raven begins setting Angie Vaughn up for a huge superkick. Eventually Angie climbs up to her feet, and that's when we see a big grin break out on James's face. Raven approaches Angie with his leg extended for the trademark superkick, BUT SHE DUCKS IT!
PC: "JAMES RAVEN JUST MISSED!"
James turns around in a state of complete confusion, somehow whiffing on one of his most practiced moves. James' mouth is open in shock, and when he turns around Angie Vaughn shoves her ENTIRE FIST into his open mouth!
HHL: "EW!"
PC: "The Mandible Claw!"
As Angie Vaughn takes James Raven down to the mat with the mandible claw the audience goes into a stunned silence. Meanwhile, outside the ring, Atara Raven is still kicking the ever living dogshit out of JMJ, not even aware of the change of momentum back in the ring!
HHL: "Raven needs to get out of this hold!"
Angie Vaughn holds James Raven down on the mat with her whole fist shoved into his mouth, all the way up to the forearm. James looks desperately over to his corner for Atara, but he doesn't see her there! He has no idea where she is anymore, and the painful humiliation from the mandible claw is becoming too much for him to bear!
JAMES RAVEN TAPS OUT!
PC: "HE'S GETTING OUT OF THE HOLD RIGHT NOW- BY SUBMITTING TO IT!"
Winners by Submission - Angelica Vaughn & JMJ Jr
Angie Vaughn hops off James Raven as soon as the bell is rung. She starts jumping up and down in celebration as a ringside assistant brings the tag belts into the ring. Atara also slides into the ring, but she's completely shocked to find Angie Vaughn celebrating while James Raven lay on the ground! Atara gives a bitchy look to Angie before she goes down to check on James Raven.
PC: "Angelica Vaughn is celebrating her victory while her partner is still outside the ring!"
HHL: "I think JMJ Jr might be unconscious right now! This victory is all Angie's to celebrate!"
The crowd immediately starts to boo upon hearing the intro from the Scorpion's hit.
“Introducing first, they are representing CCPE… first, bring led to the ring by Charles Beckett, he is BAM MILLER!!”
Bam Miller explodes out through the curtain to the top of the ramp as he followed by Charles Beckett. The duo stops at the top of the ramp when suddenly the lights go completely dark inside the arena.
The smart marks pop huge while the fickle fans boo upon the countdown clock ticking away to zero as “Judas” by Fozzy hits the speakers.
“And his partner, he needs no introduction… He is the FACE OF PROFESSIONAL WRESTLING, former XWF Universal, XWF Tag Team, XWF Television, and XWF World Heavyweight Champion… He is… “CHRONIC” CHRIS PAGE!”
The ovation, good or bad, intensifies as walking out to the top of the ramp is the man himself, Chris Page. Chris and Charles shake hands before CCP and Bam share a fist bump. The trio starts to make the walk to the ring as for only the second time this year Chris Page has answered a call to compete under the XWF umbrella. The trio reaches ringside where Bam immediately slides into the ring getting to his feet while pacing back and forth like a caged animal that’s ready to be unleashed Chris Page makes his way up the steel steps to the ring apron where he steps through the ropes and into the ring. Chris removes his black leather jacket with various sizes of spikes. The music fades away leaving a resounding chant of CCP! CCP! CCP! CCP! draws a sly smirk from Page as he and Bam talk over some last-minute strategies.
“And their opponents.”
“They are representing the Trilogy, first he is JASON CASHE… and his partner, making a rare XWF appearance, he is a former KING OF THE XWF, XWF UNIVERSAL CHAMPION, XWF Tag Team Champion, XWF Trios Champion XWF XTREME CHAMPION, XWF UNITED STATES CHAMPION, XWF TELEVISION CHAMPION, and 50% owner of the XWF…he is THEO PRYCE!”
Cashe emerges to the top of the ramp followed by Theo. All four men lock eyes from a distance when we see Cashe and Pryce start to make the walk to the ring to an equally mixed response from the sold-out crowd. The anticipation builds as Cashe and Pryce near ringside. They reach the ring where they both climb up on the apron before stepping through the ropes. The referee is present as he stands between Cashe, Theo, Miller, and Page. The music fades away leaving nothing but a roaring ovation from the crowd
"CHRONIC" CHRIS PAGE AND BAM MILLER
- vs -
THEO PRYCE AND JASON CASHE
PIP: This is one of the ones that I’ve been waiting for!
HHL: Cashe and Miller have been at each other's throats for months, and now it comes down to this Fall’s Count Anywhere Tag Team Match where they’ve brought some heavies to the mix.
The crowd roars as the referee call for the opening bell. All four men are in the ring as they walk to the center of the ring. Cashe and Miller go face to face while Page and Pryce do the same. There’s so much animosity building, it’s at a fever pitch when they all start trading blows! The crowd erupts as Miller and Cashe tee off with a flurry of right hands as do Page and Pryce!
PIP: The last thing this is going to be is a wrestling match! This is an all-out fight!
Page cuts off Pryce with a thumb to the eye as he drives him back into a neutral corner while Cashe gets the better of Miller within the opening exchange. Page comes up behind Cashe catching his right arm as he rears back with a balled-up right fist followed by hooking his left arm for Bam Miller to start pounding away on with right hands mixed with knife-edge chops! Miller snatches Cashe from Page’s grasp and hurls him out to the floor and goes out after him. Page turns around to see Pryce explode out from the corner with a double leg takedown where he takes a full mount and buries his right hand into the face of Page with repeated right hands Out on the floor, Bam takes Cashe and looks to drive him face-first off the ring steps only to have Cashe put on the brakes using his hands. He elbows Miller in the ribs breaking the grasp before smashing Bam face-first off the steel steps! In the ring Pryce picks Page up off the mat where he shoots him into the ropes, Page latches onto the top rope as opposed to bouncing off which prompts Pryce to rush toward CCP who elevates Pryce over the top rope where he lands on the ring apron. Page spins around where Pryce throws a right hand, Page blocks before rocking Pryce with a Juda’s Effect elbow strike sending him sailing off the apron and down to the floor!
HHL: All hell is breaking loose and we’re just getting started!
PIP: I told you this wasn’t going to be a wrestling match.
HHL: Here is a cookie.
On the other side of the ring Cashe snatches excess camera cord and wraps it around Bam’s neck where he starts choking away at him. Page darts across the ring baseball sliding out to the floor where he comes up behind Cashe and gouges both eyes causingJason to release the choke on Bam! Chris spins Jason around taking a front waist lock where he hurls him overhead with a Release Belly to Belly overhead throw on the floor sending Cashe landing with a spat on the protective mats surrounding the ring. Page gets back to his feet where he throws out his arms garnering a mixed reception. Bam blows past Page where he starts putting the boots to Cashe on the floor! Chris makes his way over joining in with Miller!
Theo Pryce is seen on the other side of the ring getting himself back up to vertical base. Theo comes around the ring spinning Miller around! Bam swings with a right hand that Pryce blocks and counters with a boot to the midsection as he hurls Bam back into the ring! Theo slides back into the ring going after Bam while Page picks Cashe up! Page brings Jason toward the announcer’s table where he drives him face first off the table top. Theo looks back out to the floor where he sees Page rolls Jason onto the top of the table!
Theo rolls out to the floor where he spins Page around before he can climb up on the table!
Page turns swinging, Theo blocks and nails Page with repeated right hands before spinning Page around where he’s able to drive his lower back first into the apron of the ring. Jason Cashe starts getting to his feet on the top of the table. Theo snatches Page by the hair and he tosses Page up on top of the table. The crowd starts to buzz as Jason picks Page up, Jason positions CCP where he delivers a Stump Puller Piledriver driving Page through the table to a huge ovation from the crowd!
PIP: Cashe could have broken Page’s neck!
The crowd is on fire as Theo helps Jason Cashe up to his feet while Chris Page is laid out in the rumble of the table! Bam in the ring Miller bounces off the far side gaining a full head of steam and when Theo and Cashe turn around toward the ring Bam is diving through the ropes with a Suicide Dive smashing into Cashe and Pryce!
HHL: AIR MILLER!
All three men hit the deck with Bam popping back up to his feet first. He immediately lasers in on Cashe picking him up off the floor where he hurls him back into the ring! Miller tosses the ring apron back pulling out a steel chair! Miller slides into the ring with the chair in hand, Miller is back to his feet measuring Cashe who is starting to get up to a vertical base! Miller swings the chair at Cashe’s head! Jason evades and the chair bounces off the top rope and projectiles back into Miller’s face!
Cashe rolls up Bam with a School Boy!
1!!
2!!
THRE..
Bam kicks out of the near fall!
PIP: Talk about an epic backfire! It almost cost Bam the match!
Cashe beats Miller to his feet and lands several right hands before taking Bam back into the ropes. Jason shoots Miller across the ring, Bam bounces off the ropes ducking under a lariat from Cashe. Miller puts on the brakes and when Cashe spins around walking into a double thrust to the throat! Miller takes Cashe and sends him back out to the floor through the top and middle ropes. Miller steps through the ropes out to the ring apron.
Miller waits for Cashe to get back to his feet where he comes off the apron looking for a double ax handle!
Cashe counters with a right hand into the midsection of Miller on his way down to the floor! Cashe follows up with a double-leg takedown before catapulting Miller face-first off a ring post! Miller bounces off the post staggering to the guardrail where he falls over the railing and down to the arena floor! Across the ring, Theo has a mount on Page where he hammers down with right hands! Pryce gets up off Page and pulls him up out of the rubble of the table before shooting him right shoulder first off the steel steps! On the far side of the ringside area, Jason Cashe climbs over the barrier and into the crowd!
HHL: With the level of violence Cashe and Miller have brought to the table on the road to Bad Medicine you have to wonder what levels will they go to tonight!?!?!
Cashe picks Bam up off the floor rocking him backward several feet with a hard right hand. Bam turns his body away from Cashe where he snatches a walking cane from a senior citizen! Cashe comes up from behind spinning him around where Miller cracks Cashe in the ribs with the cane! Cashe is doubled over for Bam to whack across the spine of Cashe! Back ringside Pryce rolls Page back into the ring where he slides in after him. Pryce gets to a vertical base where he makes his way over to Page who is pushing up to all fours. Pryce stomps on the fingers of the right hand of Page to a massive ovation before he looks to pick him up off the mat where Page low blows Pryce!
The crowd roars with boos while Theo drops to his knees.
Page steps up to a vertical base where delivers a running Mafia Kick to the face of Pryce knocking him down to the mat where Page makes a cover!
1!!
2!!
THRE..
Pryce escapes with a kickout while Page smacks his hands together three times calling for a three count while being shown two fingers. The camera splits off where we find Bam Miller choking Cashe with camera cables following them on the floor! Bam then starts gouging the eyes of Cashe! He nails him with a right hand staggering Cashe backward. Bam runs towards Jason who ducks his head delivering a back body drop on the cold concrete floor! Miller smacks with a sickening thud as Cashe makes the cover!
1!!
2!!
THRE…
Bam kicks out!
PIP: We got a referee in the ring, a referee out in the crowd, action is all over the place!
Page picks Theo up off the mat where he locks in a front face lock, he underhooks Pryce’s right leg where he hoists him up in the air delivering a Hangman’s DDT! Page rolls out to the floor where he jumps the barrier as we see on the split screen Jason Cashe climbs up on the barrier that separates the floor from the lower bowl of the arena as we see Bam beginning to make his way up to a vertical base. Cashe leaps off the barrier with a blockbuster on the concrete floor to Miller! The crowd can’t believe what they’re seeing as Cashe makes another cover!
1!!
2!!
THRE…
Page makes the save eyelashes before the fatal three count to a massive gasp from the crowd. Page immediately picks Cashe up where he takes Jason down a corridor on the floor leading back into the backstage hallway where he decks Cashe with a hard right hand knocking him down the hallway.
CHRIS PAGE: You think it’s funny that you insulted me?!
Chris snatches a folding chair where he jabs Cashe in the ribs with the rounded end of the chair doubling him over where he waffles him across the back dropping him to the floor.
CHRIS PAGE: Who’s laughing now!
Page raises the chair and drives it down across the back of Cashe before tossing it as we hear the thud of steel meeting concrete. Page makes the cover on Cashe.
1!!
2!!
THRE…
Cashe escapes with a kick out!
HHL: How much are their bodies going to be able to take? That’s the million dollar question.
The screen splits off again as Bam Miller is getting back to his feet where he starts making his way toward the corridor leading to the backstage area while we see Theo rolling out to the floor as he clutches the back of his neck. He comes over the barrier while backstage in the hallway Page picks Cashe up holding him by his arms for Bam Miller who is unloading with a flury of right hands to Cashe exposed face with the free shots! Bam snatches Cashe and drives him into the concrete wall!
Theo Pryce emerges on the scene with a plastic cup of beer that he throws in the face of Miller!
Page swings at Pryce with a right hand, Pryce blocks and counters with an eye gouge! Pryce takes Page down with a drop toe hold as he then transitions into the Ankle Lock Submission in the hallway! Both referee’s are on the scene with one asking Page to surrender! CCP refuses to give up while we see Cashe spear Miller through a closed door leading into catering! Cashe crawls into the cover on Miller hooking the outside leg.
1!!
2!!
THRE…
Miller escapes with a kickout while back out in the hallway Theo continues to crank on the ankle of Page until he manages to roll through sending Theo doing a forward roll, Theo pops back up to his feet followed by Page. The two stare down each other before they start throwing right hands! We head into catering where Jason Cashe has Bam up as he plants him with a DDT! Jason doesn’t make a cover, instead he sticks the right index finger in his mouth before cramming it into the ear of Bam Miller giving him a Wet Willie!
Now Cashe makes a cover!
1!!
2!!
THRE…
Miller escapes with a kick out to a gasp from the crowd.
PIP: I never thought I’d ever see a Wet Willie for a near fall.
Cashe gets back to his feet where he directs his attention to a white skirted table housing various stainless steel containers with closed lids. Cashe clears the table knocking the containers of various food everywhere before turning his attention back to Miller. Cashe picks Bam up and drives him face first off the table before rolling him on top of it.
HHL: This isn’t looking good for Bam Miller!
Cashe climbs up on top of the table.
PIP: We saw Cashe put Page through a table earlier in the match, so why not Bam as well?
Cashe stands up and looks to pick Bam up who counters the pick up with a gouge to the eyes! It’s Miller with a double arm DDT through the table! Miller makes a cover just as Theo enters the room.
1!!
2!!
THRE…
Pryce breaks up the pin attempt as he yanks Bam off the cover!
HHL: Opportune timing by Theo Pryce!
Pryce picks Miller up and hurls him over a table housing tea and water pitchers sending liquid flying everywhere! Pryce doesn’t waste any time in snatching the right leg of Miller locking him in a Figure Four Leg Lock in the midst of the tea and water covered floor! A referee is right there asking Bam to surrender! Miller refuses! Chris Page emerges into the room with a toilet seat around his head and his hair soaking wet.
PIP: Did Theo give Page a swirly?
Page makes his way over stomping on the face of Pryce causing the hold to be broken! Page removes the toilet lid from around his neck and whacks Theo in the chest with it before turning his attention back to Jason Cashe. Page picks Cashe up off the floor and hurls him through a secondary door off Catering sending him spilling out into the hallway. Page follows him out where he snatches a dirty mop that’s leanding up against the wall. CCP turns back toward the open door where Theo is getting to his feet and us uses the dirty end of the mop driving it into Theo’s face!
Cashe comes up behind Page landing a Side Russian Leg Sweep on the concrete! Cashe makes the cover.
1!!
2!!
THRE..
Bam dives on top of the cover breaking the count to a massive gasp from the arena. Miller gets back to his feet with a light limp as he snatches up Cashe and takes him where he hurls him into a set of loading cases. Pryce picks up the mop, he gives chase where he is able to crack Miller across the back breaking the mop handle! Bam is taken down to the concrete floor while Theo starts helping Cashe back up to his feet .
HHL: This war between theTrilogy and CCPE is waging on!
Cashe wheels the loading case back away from Bam and as we see Miller starting to get to all fours Cashe pushes the case smashing it into the head of Miller! CCP staggers over spinning Theo around where he thumbs him in the eye. Cashe covers Bam hooking the leg.
1!!
2!!
THRE…
Page yanks Cashe off the cover breaking the count. CCP pulls Cashe up and starts biting him across the forehead! Page shoves Cashe toward the hallway before turning back around where he checks on Bam only to find Theo who gives him a Superkick dropping Page where he stands! Pryce turns and picks Bam up where he takes him toward the hallway decking him with a right hand that spins Miller around where Cashe chops him across the chest with a knife edge chop! Pryce and Cashe snatch Miller by the side of the head and bring him back through a tunnel that spills back out to the arena floor!
PIP: They’re on the way back!
Theo decks Bam while Jason diverts his attention to the side of hte tunnel. He snatches a table and sets it up. There’s abother table and he gabs it and sets it up beside the first before turning his attention back to Theo who drives Bam face first off the table. Theo points up, Cashe shrugs his shoulders and comes down to the hend of the tunnel and where turns the corner and starts walking up the stairs into the lower bowl of the arena, Fans pat him on the back as he makes his way up to the top of the tunnel.
HHL: What the hell is Cashe thinking?!?!?!
Theo rolls Bam on top of the tables! The crowd is going insane as Jason steps over the railing on top of the tunnel looking down at Bam who is prone on the tables being held by Theo who is rooting Cashe on! Jason looks around the sold out arena as the crowd gets louder and louder. He leaps off the top of the tunnel with a Flying Elbow Drop some 15-20 feet crashing down on top of Bam Miller driving them both through the tables to a sickening crash! The roof explodes upon impact as a massive “HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!” chant echoes throughout the building!
PIP: That was the damnedest Flying Elbow drop I’ve ever seen!
HHL: That’s got to do it! Cashe manages to make a cover!
The crowd counts along as Pryce is facing them leading the count!
1!!
2!!
THRE…
The air is sucked out of the building as Chris Page makes the save diving onto Jason Cashe at the last second breaking the count!
PIP: PAGE MADE THE SAVE!
HHL: THIS WAR WILL CONTINUE!
Pryce spins around seeing Page staggering back to his feet as he gives him the middle finger! CCP steps over a downed Cashe and Miller as they are laid out in the ruble of the table. The crowd roars loudly as Page and Pryce start to trade right hands! Page cuts Pryce off as he drives a knee into the midsection of Pryce before taking him throug the crowd toward the ringside area! CCP hurls Theo over the barrier back to the ringside area. Page climbs over the barrier where he snatches Pryce by both legs and cartapults him face first off the ring post! Theo smacks off the post forehead first busting himself open as he crumbles to the floor!
Back at the tunnel neither Miller of Cashe seem to be moving yet as there is nothing that referee can do but look on incase a cover is made. The crowd looking on starts to pop as Jason Cashe starts to move while back ringside we see Page picks a bloody Pryce up off the floor and hurls him under the bottom ropes into the ring. Chris slides into the ring where he uses the ropes to pull himself up to his feet. The blood flows from Theo’s forehead as he rolls over to his chest and starts pushing himself up off the mat, Page sizes up Pryce who is getting up to his feet where he turns around and is met by a boot to the midsection doubling Theo over!
Page underhooks the arms and delivers the PAGE PLANT to Pryce!
PIP: Don’t tell me Page is going to beat Pryce?!?!?!
Page rolls Theor over and makes a cover hooking the inside leg as the crowd is on fire.
1!!
2!!
THRE….
The crowd erupts with excitement as JASON CASHE crashes down ont op of Page with a springboard splash from the apron of the ring saving breaking the count! Pryce rolls toward the ropes as Jason clutches his ribs while getting back to his feet. Cashe has his eyes on Page who is solely getting himself back up to his feet. Cashe bounces off the ropes where he clobbers Page from behind with the MARK OF JASON!
HHL: That HAS to be the knockout shot!
Page crumbles to the mat when Cashe dropping to his knees, he rolls Page over making the front press hooking the inside leg!
1!!
2!!
THRE…
Page kicks out at the final possible moment to a collective gasp from the crowd! Cashe gets to his knees where he cuts his eyes toward the official who shows him two fingers.
PIP: Stay on him!
Cashe gets to one knee before stepping up to his feet. The crowd is on fire as he calls for his SCRAP ACTION DRIVER!
HHL: If Cashe hits this it’s going to be over!
Page slowly starts to roll over to his chest as he pushes himself up off the mat and back to his feet, he staggers backward before being spun around by Cashe who plants him with a boot to the midsection and underhooks the arms of Chris Page! He plants him with a vaicious SCRAP ACTION DRIVER! The crowd erupts as Cashe rolls Page over making the cover!
1!!
2!!
THRE…
BAM MILLER pulls the referee out of the ring to a massive gasp followed by boos that ring out from all over the building!
PIP: Bam Miller just saved the effing day for Chris Page!
Cashe cuts his eyes to the floor where Bam Miller flips him off! Cashe rolls out to the floor taking a swing at Miller who ducks and shoves Cashe into the ring steps. Meanwhile back in the ring Pryce is pulling himself back up to his feet where he takes notice of Page being in a good position for the Curb Stomp! Pryce whips the blood from his face as he backs up into a neutral corner where he looks to deliver the Curb Stomp!
Page rolls out of the way causing Pryce to stomp in the mat.
Bam Miller has rolled back into the ring where he catches Pryce with a boot to the midsection as he looks to hit MILLER TIME! Pryce shoves Miller forward sending him into the ropes, Miller bounces off the ropes where Pryce scoops him up over his shoulder but before he can land any move Page throws baby powder into the eyes of Pryce! Miller slides down Pryce’s back and spins him around where he hits MILLER TIME!
Bam Miller rolls Pryce over making the cover hooking the leg!
1!!
Cashe slides into the ring!
2!!
Page dives on top of Cashe halting his forward movement.
3!!
Winners - Bam Miller and Chris Page
PIP: I don’t believe it! Bam Miller has just pinned Theo Pryce!
Cashe gets to his knee’s as he can’t believe what’s just unfolded while Page and Miller escape to the floor. One of the referee’s raises the arms of both men in the air as the crowd is in shock with how this has played out.
HHL: You talk about a war that’s unfolded but on this night it’s Bam Miller and CCPE continuing to establish why they are the powerhouse of Professional Wrestling.
Page congratulates Miller consistently telling him “I TOLD YOU SO!” while in the ring Cashe checks on Theo. Jason looks up the ramp at Bam Miller who crotch chops him before Chris Page riaes his arm at the top of the ramp for good measure.
PIP: Cashe and Pryce have nothing to be ashamed of. This fight could have went many different ways at many different times. I have a feeling that this issue between Miller and Cashe is far from over.
Lights in the Sky hits as the fans begin to boo. Marf makes his way out onto the stage, looking around at the audience and shaking his head in disgust. He marches to the ring while the crowd continues to boo and insult him. Marf rolls into the ring and goes to a corner, climbing up and then flipping off the crowd for more heat.
Isaiah King makes his way to the ring. Holding the TV title up in the air as he does.
Pip: Last Man Standing here for the Television Title. I’ll tell ya what….that belt bounced around a bit after Charlie Nickels dropped it. Now, we have a champion we can rely on. A champion we can look up to. All hail the king!
Heather: Pip, sit down. You’re gonna blow your pace-maker.
Isaiah looks over at Pip and gives a thumbs up before staring down Marf.
The bell rings and the two men circle. They tie up and King, using his power, gets the quick upper hand. He throws Marf into the corner and begins to lay into him with body blows. Marf covers up with his forearms as King whips him into the other corner. He runs, connecting with a forearm splash and grabs Marf again and whips him back into the corner from which he came. Following him over, King hits a mean European Uppercut which stumbles Marf out to the center of the ring. He comes off the ropes and delivers a running bulldog!
The ref begins to count.
1
2
3
4
Marf is back to all fours.
King grabs his arm and locks in a chicken wing hold in the center of the ring.
Pip: Dominant early strategy here from the champ. Its last man standing, so no pinfalls, no submissions. You gotta wear the other man down until he can’t get back up. You don’t need to get fancy, you just gotta be efficient, and efficient is what Isiah King is!
Marf is trying to spin out of it, shaking his head and trying to power out. King is trying to keep the hands locked together. Marf is able to get to his feet, however, and uses the momentum to spin Isiah around, lifting him over his back. Marf drills him with a fall away slam. That creates enough separation and lets the challenger catch some wind after the initial onslaught. King pops up quickly, though, before the ref can get past a 1 count. King comes back at Marf and Swaysons hits him with a scoop slam, coming off the ropes and delivering a leg drop across the champ’s sternum. Knowing that won’t be enough, however, Marf stays on offense, picking him up by the head and tossing him into the corner.
Heather: Marf Swaysons has a bar room brawler style. He’s rough and tumble. Isaiah is going to have to out-physical Marf to walk away with this belt. Either way, both of these men will need an ice bath when this ones over!
Marf elbows King in the face and whips him into the ropes. He goes for a big boot but King drops below it, tripping him with a drop toe hold. Marf pops up quick and walks right into it.
Discus elbow from King.
Marf stumbles back to the corner. King walks over and sits him on the middle rope. He delivers a body blow before standing him up on the ropes, the turnbuckle between his legs. King postures to the crowd quickly as he begins to rain shots down on Marf’s head. The crowd counts along.
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10!
Ten big shots to the head, but the champ isn’t done. He picks Marf up one more level standing him now on the top rope. Marf, seeing the predicament he is in, headbutts King. The champ wavers, almost falling off, but maintains his balance. He fires a hard shot to the head of Marf. Marf fires back. The two teeter on the top but King gets the upper hand. He hooks the tights.
SUPLEX OFF THE TOP
Both men are down in the center of the ring but Marf is worse for wear.
The ref begins to count.
One!
Two!
Three!
Four!
King is back up to one knee.
Five!
Marf grabs the ropes and lifts himself up.
Isaiah hits a running dropkick, knocking Marf through the ropes and out of the ring.
Marf gathers himself on the outside, using the barricade for balance.
Pip: Impressive showing from the champ here. He has dominated from jump street, and now has Marf in a precarious position!
He climbs the top rope. Marf turns right into a missile drop kick off the top! He crashes into the barricade. King didn’t land well, though…and seemed to tweak something in his leg. He winces, pulling his knee to his chest. The ref counts from the ring.
One!
Two!
Heather: Both men are down here. The ref is counting them both!
Three!
Four!
The crowd is counting along with him.
Five!
Six!
Both men are up, but King is gimpy. Marf notices this and immediately goes for the leg. A chop block takes the leg out and flips Isiah King upside down. Marf is keying in on that leg. He grabs King’s leg and bounces it hard off the barricade. The “OOOHHH” from King is almost overshadowed from the “OHH” from this capacity crowd. King is crawling away. Marf, who seems confident now, stays on the attack. He grabs the knee and flips King, the bulk of the leg landing squarely on the steel steps.
Marf is feeling it now. He yells out, throwing up a fist.
King, being resilient, gets back to his feet again. He can barely put pressure on the leg. He rolls into the ring, Marf follows. When the two get into the ring again, Marf chop blocks the leg again. King goes down again. Marf picks him up, hitting a massive t-bone suplex. The ring shakes.
”COUNT HIM!” Marf yells.
The refs gets into position.
ONE!
TWO!
THREE!
FO–
Isaiah is up to all fours. Marf snarls, locking in a leg lock to put even more pressure on that leg.
King reaches the ropes, but it doesn’t matter. It's the last man standing, there are no rules.
Marf pulls him back out to the center of the ring, but King uses this to slide onto his back. He kicks Marf in the face with his good leg, backing him off and breaking the hold. Isaiah flips up to his feet, Shawn Michaels style. He lands wobbly though. Marf goes for the boot to knock him back down but King ducks.
SLINGBLADE!
Out of nowhere the big move from the TV champ!
Pip: Marf has been trying to destroy that leg of Isiah King. He’s been trying to injure the champ. Isaiah King is so resilient, and just hit a HUGE move….but will it be enough? That leg is worse for wear!
The ref is counting again.
ONE
TWO
THREE
FOUR
FIVE!
SIX!
SEVEN!
Marf is back to a vertical base. He is showing some toughness, also.
The two square up. They trade blows in the center of the ring. Back and forth.
KING
MARF
KING
MARF
KING
MARF
The crowd is chanting the names now with each blow.
KING
MARF
KING
MARF
KING
MARF
KING
Marf wobbles, and goes down. Blood runs from his mouth.
The ref is in position as Isaiah, panting and exhausted, wincing from the pain in his leg, rests against the turnbuckle in the corner with a confident look.
ONE
TWO
THREE
FOUR
FIVE
Marf is stirring.
SIX
SEVEN
EIGHT
NINE
Marf is up.
Heather: This may not seem like a long grind of a match but both of these men have hit high impact, high damage moves tonight. It takes its toll. 10 seconds is not as long as you may think!
Pip: You can get up at 11, but it doesn’t matter! And Marf was awfully close there!
Marf is up. He has blood running from his mouth. Kings nose is puffy. Marf signals to bring it on. He wants more.
King gimps out of the corner. Marf swings, King reverses and lifts him, Marf lands on his feet, elbows King. He lifts the champ, who lands on his leg, and gimps. Marf turns going for another hard right, King ducks.
Guillotine of Destruction!!!!!!!!!!
King falls, his leg giving out, but Marf is down.
ONE
TWO
THREE
The crowd counting along.
FOUR
FIVE
SIX
SEVEN
EIGHT
NINE
TEN!
Winner and STILL XWF TELEVISION CHAMPION - ISAIAH KING
HHL: An incredible effort by Marf tonight but it wasn't meant to be as Isaiah King continues his hot start here in the XWF.
PIP: King is pretty good I will admit.
The camera pans…
To the XWF Universal Champion’s Locker Room.
Mark Flynn is staring at his reflection…
In his red, white and blue belt…
The Universal Championship.
Flynn vainly admires the edges of his chin.
“You’re a Winner.”
He points in his own face’s reflection.
“You’re a SUCCESS STORY™.”
He draws in close.
“YOU were chosen by the Optimal Path.”
…Flynn grins.
“And YOU… Will… WIN.”
Flynn grins. And closes the door.
There’s a guy with glasses right behind the locker.
“You sure will, Mister Flynn!”
“AGH!”
Startled, Flynn grabs the nerd by the shoulders and thrusts him into the metallic locker!
“WHO ARE YOU? WHAT DO YOU WANT?”
The mysterious dork adjusts his glasses, seemingly unbothered by Flynn’s hostility.
“My name is Irwin, sir! I’m a huge fan!”
…Flynn squints suspiciously.
“Fan, huh?”
The Uni champ scoffs.
“Please. I think I get what’s going on here. You break into my locker room, steal some memorabilia like one of my used tissues, then hawk it on eBay, right?”
Flynn sneers.
“If you’re trying to make a quick buck, Irwin… You should know I will SUE YOU! That snot is my INTELLECTUAL PROPERTY AND I AM THE SOLE ENTITLED PARTY TO FINANCIAL BENEFITS DERIVED THEREFROM!”
Irwin shakes his head!
“No, Mister Flynn! I read your book! About seeking the Optimal Path! I wanted to meet you in person! I snuck through security to get here to you!”
“…Huh. Why’d you do that?”
“XWF Security was an adversary! Defeating them makes me stronger! Chapter 12!”
Irwin lifts an ear-marked copy of Flynn’s book, “Your Optimal Path”, up to the champ’s face.
Flynn glances down… And for the first time, he notices the kid wearing an officially-licensed, Optimal Path t-shirt…
…Flynn grins.
“Ohhhh, I get it. You read my book, now you want to bask in the glow of my greatness!”
Irwin nods vigorously!
“Exactly, Mister Flynn!”
Flynn smiles.
“All right, Irwinner. Let us begin…”
Flynn looks to the left. Then to the right!
Irwin joins him in checking both ways!
“Lesson #1.”
…Flynn grabs Irwin by the ear.
“STAY.”
Flynn walks the nerd by the ear to his locker room door.
“THE FUCK.”
He pops the door open.
“OUTTA MY LO-.“
When Flynn opens the door… He sees a packed a hallway.
A legion of screaming fans.
Wearing ‘Optimal Path’ t-shirts!
They immediately start chanting for Flynn!
Flynn!
Flynn!
Flynn slams the door!
Behind the door, there’s a collective AEW of disappointment.
…Flynn is very confused.
“…Is it fucking Opposite Day? Where the Hell did these fucking simps come from?”
A finger taps Flynn’s shoulder.
Flynn looks down. The five-and-a-half-foot tall Irwin, still held by the ear, wriggles and squirms.
“If I… may say… sir. They also… must want to glean your wisdom!”
…
“…You fucking with me, Irwin?”
Irwin tries his hardest to shake his head, difficult due to Flynn’s vice grip on his ear.
“No, sir! We’re dedicated to the Optimal Path! We’ve been harrassing and arguing with XWF fans that say you’re a scumbag or that the Optimal Path isn’t real! We’re your staunchest defenders!”
…
Flynn scratches his head.
“Back up, Ir-Dog, You’re telling me that I have a legion of nerds, willing to harass my critics and sing my praises… Just because I’m deliriously successful?”
“…As long as you’re the Uni champ, yeah, I guess!”
…
A single tear falls down Flynn’s face.
“I fucking love America.”
The words "FOLLOW ME" show up on the X-Tron screen as smoke billows at the entrance. Blue and white lights flicker. At the 10 second mark, he steps through the smoke wearing his jacket (Rated R Edge trench coat). Looking to both sides of the crowd. He walks slowly to the ring until he gets about 3/4 of the way down, then jogs and slides into the ring (edge style)...When he gets into the ring he gets up on the far turnbuckle and gets up on it, throwing both arms up.
he arena lights turn gold as the intro of “Soldier Dream” by ROOT FIVE hits the PA.
ANNOUNCER: “And now, standing tall at 6'0" and weighing in at 227 lbs., from Osaka, Japan, “The Lion”... RAIOOOOOOOOOOON… KIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIDOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!”
Raion Kido appears on stage, letting out a lion’s roar.
“Saint Seiyaaa! (Seiyaaa!)
Mezasu kiboo no iro wa
Kedakai hodo utsukushii…”
Raion spreads his arms and breaks into a bird run towards the ring, slapping the fans’ hands along the way. He slides into the ring on his belly and springs into his feet.
“Saint Seiyaaa! (Seiyaaa!)
Tsubasa wa ten wo kakeru
Erabareta moushigo no you niiiiiiiiiiiiiii!”
Facing the camera, Raion throws a one-two punch forward, his final pose as the music dies down.
CHRIS CHAOS
- vs -
RAION KIDO
Heather: Well this next one is going to be another war!
Pip: Yeah the mind games have been played heavily leading up to this match.
Heather: Chaos has definitely gotten under the skin of the former universal champ. How will Kido respond tonight?
Pip: Can he stay calm? I think the cracks are starting to appear…
Chris Chaos paces slowly between two corners while staring a hole through Raion Kido. The referee checks with Chaos to see if he is ready. The referee turns and checks with Kido and this gives Chaos his opening as he shoots in suddenly and takes Kido down from behind with a chop block to the back of the knee. The fans boo as Chaos stomps on Kido before the referee backs him off and then calls for the bell to start the match officially. Chaos goes to kick at the knee but Kido catches him with an elbow to the gut.
Chaos backs up and Kido begins to hit him with some well timed open palm strikes. After the third shot Chaos grabs Kido into a side headlock. He tightens the hold but Kido backs them into the ropes. He tries to bounce and use his momentum to shove Chaos off but it is countered into a snapmare takedown. Kido manages to rolls through and then runs to the ropes. He roars back with a clothesline but Chaos ducks underneath. As Kido bounces off the ropes and comes back again Chaos hits a low drop kick right into Kido’s knee, sending him sprawling to the mat in pain.
Heather: That looked bad!
Pip: Kido went down hard there.
Heather: That drop kick was well timed and may have injured Raion here…
Chaos stomps on the downed Kido for a moment before grabbing a hold of the injured leg and applying a half Boston crab. The crowd is booing while he yells at Kido to give up. Chaos wrenches on the leg but Kido powers his way to the ropes as quickly as he can. The referee yells at Chaos to break the hold but he leans back and keeps it clinched. The referee starts to count him down until Chaos releases the hold and backs off with his hands in the air. The crowd is roaring with boos while Chaos soaks it up.
Heather: Chris Chaos clearly taking liberties here!
Pip: He has effectively picked his spots early on and it is working!
Heather: Kido will have to fight through this early pain to survive.
Pip: Chaos might just have his number here.
Kido struggles to pull himself up with the ropes. Chaos closes back in on him and hits a strong double axe handle to the back. Kido stumbles and then backs into the corner. Chaos lines him up and then dives with a stinger splash. Kido manages to dodge it at the last second. Chaos crashes chest first into the turnbuckles and Kido takes advantage from behind with a big German suplex. Kido attempts to make a pin with the bridge.
1…
Kido’s leg gives out and he breaks the pin attempt. He grabs at his knee in pain while Chaos rolls over, dazed. Kido gets back up and shakes his injured leg while Chaos pulls himself back up as well. Chaos suddenly sprints and goes for a short arm clothesline but Kido ducks. Chaos spins around and Kido lunges for a sling blade but this time Chaos ducks out of the way. He spins and throws a low kick that nails the injured leg of Kido, taking him down. Chaos quickly grabs hold of his legs and applies a sharpshooter.
Heather: Raion is in trouble!
Pip: Chaos has really done a good job of taking away any space for Kido.
Heather: The experience is definitely being used but Kido is no rookie!
Pip: We’ll see!
Kido yells out in pain while crawling for the ropes. Chaos holds onto the sharpshooter but still is being slowly dragged closer to the ropes. He screams at the crowd to shut up as they rally and chant for Kido. He reaches for the ropes and is only inches away. Chaos suddenly releases the hold before quickly hauling Kido to his feet. Chaos pulls him in and then hits a nasty looking spike pile driver. The fans boo as Chaos hooks both legs for the cover.
1…
2…
Kick out by Kido!
Heather: Big kick out!
Pip: Close call!
Chaos gets back up and walks over to the ropes, arguing with the crowd. Kido rolls over and slowly tries to get up but is clearly dazed. Chaos comes back over to him and stomps on him a few times. Chaos then grabs hold of Kido’s injured leg and drags him into the middle of the ring. Chaos starts locking in a figure four leg lock but Kido somehow manages to counter it into a small package roll up from out of nowhere.
1…
2…
Kick out by Chaos!
Kido struggles to get back up while a furious Chaos pulls himself to his feet. Chaos yells at Kido and goes for a big boot but Kido rolls underneath it. As Chaos turns around to face him, Kido pops up into the air and connects with a jumping side kick to the head of Chaos. Both men drop to the mat and Kido rubs his injured leg for a moment. He starts getting up while Chaos rolls over and shakes his head. The two end up locking up and Chaos uses Kido’s softened up leg to force him back.
Chaos backs Kido into the corner and goes for a close range forearm to the head but it gets blocked. Kido then throws a wild head butt that catches Chaos off guard. He backs off and Kido hops onto the middle turnbuckle with his good leg. Before he can do anything, Chaos throws himself into Kido causing him to fall off the turnbuckle and onto the mat in a seated position. Chaos steps back, surveys the scene and then runs up and hits a low drop kick to Kido’s back, driving him into the corner. Chaos rolls out of the ring and grabs onto Kido’s bad leg. He wraps it around the ring post and locks in a figure four with the steel post between them.
Heather: Raion is in a lot of pain but this is not a legal hold!
Pip: Chaos doesn’t care he is trying to break his leg!
Heather: Come on get in there ref!
The referee goes out to the floor and starts to argue with Chris Chaos to release the hold or he’ll count him out. The referee then rolls into the ring and starts to count Chaos out. Chaos releases the hold at seven before sliding back into the ring. He gets in the referee’s face for a moment while Kido is down in the corner, holding his battered leg in pain. Chaos mounts Kido and begins raining down punches until the referee once again steps in to break it up. Chaos gets up and pulls Kido to his feet. He pulls him in and lifts him up for the jackknife powerbomb but Kido shifts and drops into a huge DDT.
The crowd is going wild as Kido tries to pull himself back to his feet. Chaos is still down but starting to move. Kido makes it to the ropes and begins climbing the turnbuckles to the top rope. Chaos pulls himself up and stumbles into the corner, causing Kido to get crotched on the top turnbuckle. The two trade punches as Chaos climbs up with Kido. He grabs him and with an amazing display of strength, Chaos begins to slowly lift Kido up for the superplex. Kido suddenly drops behind him, somehow keeping his balance on the top rope. Kido grabs Chaos and screams in pain while delivering Rolling Crash!
Heather: Oh my god!
Pip: That was a bad landing for both men!
Heather: Kido is favouring that injured leg real bad he’s gotta make the cover!
Kido rolls around in pain but keeps getting closer to the body of Chaos. Kido rolls him onto his back and makes a cover.
1…
2…
3…NO!!!
Chaos gets a shoulder up just in time!
Heather: Unbelievable!
Pip: Chaos still in this!
Kido is breathing heavily while hitting his injured leg and trying to get up. Kido grabs the ropes and helps himself up slowly while Chaos rolls over and starts to crawl for the ropes. Kido hobbles but steadies himself and heads for Chaos, who is struggling to pull himself back up. Kido goes for the Lightning Plasma punching combo but before the third shot finds a target, Chaos counters with a knee to the gut. He grabs a hold of the injured leg of Kido and takes him down into a leg lock.
Heather: Oh no this could be it for Raion!
Pip: Chaos is gonna finish him!
Chaos screams at Kido to give in but he just screams right back. Chaos wrenches the bad leg and Kido somehow contorts his body in desperation and kicks Chaos in the jaw with his good leg. Chaos loosens his grip and Kido pulls his bad leg free. He tries to get up and throw a lariat but Chaos catches Kido and hauls him onto his shoulders. Chaos spins and goes for the Equalizer but Kido pushes himself off and lands on his good leg. He lunges forward as Chaos rushes at him and Kido nails the Lightning Bolt out of nowhere! Kido drops down to make the cover while the crowd is going insane.
1…
2…
3!!!
Winner by pinfall, Raion Kidooooo!!!
Heather: Incredible victory for Raion Kido!
Pip: What an amazing match!
Heather: Those two men put on a great showing here that’s for sure!
Pip: Chaos almost put a stop to Kido tonight that was a close one.
The crowd continues to cheer Raion Kido on as he makes his way up the ramp and to the back. Chris Chaos is sitting against the ropes, still in pain but mostly looking angry about the loss. As he slowly starts to try and get up the crowd starts to buzz. A hooded figure hops the guard rail and rolls into the ring. He tosses the hoodie off and reveals himself to be a very battered looking Marf! He still has fresh wounds from his match but somehow he is here and he stares down Chaos, waiting for him to turn around.
Heather: Oh now what the hell is he doing out here!?
Pip: I don’t know but Chaos might wanna get out of there!
As Chris Chaos turns around Marf comes roaring in and hits a thunderous spear to take Chaos down. The crowd has a mixed reaction with what is happening. Marf stands up and stares down at Chaos stoically. He drops down and rolls under the ropes and to the floor. Marf walks over to where Chaos is laying and pulls him to the side of the ring so his head is over hanging the ring apron. The crowd starts to buzz, seeing what is about to happen.
Heather: Can we get security out here!? Somebody stop this!
Pip: No don’t you do this!
Marf walks over to the commentary table and grabs one of the extra steel chairs conveniently placed nearby. Marf grabs it and folds it up while slowly turning back to Chris Chaos. Marf runs up and swings the chair, cracking it into Chaos’ skull to the delight of some and horror to most. Marf drops the chair and leans on the ring apron beside Chaos’ body as the camera is close enough to hear him. Marf stares down at Chris Chaos and pats his head.
You know who’s fault this is…
Marf looks up and stares into the camera now.
…And so do you.
Marf smirks before heading back into the crowd. Finally some security and medical staff race down to ringside but the damage has been done. Marf leaves through
After the dust has settled and Chris Chaos has come to his senses a bit, thanks to his friend Jenny Myst who has helped him to his feet after a hard hitting fight with former Universal Champion Raion Kido, one of the biggest names in the XWF, as well as an unexpected assault from Marf Swaysons.
"I'm good… I'm fucking GOOD, Jenny!"
Chaos shoves Myst away from him and turns away, hanging his head in a corner.
"Every god damned time I come this close to making a statement, I end up on the losing end. Every time! Corporate Chaos, ICONOCLAST, now THIS… I'm sick and tired of the XWF haunting my dreams and turning them all into nightmares!"
"It's just a match, Chris. You showed everyone here you were dangerous. Threatening. Everyone all the way up to Mark Flynn knows that CHRIS FUCKING CHAOS is someone to fear!"
"Oh stick it up your ragged count, Jenny, I failed and everyone saw it. Mark Flynn? I'll end up booked against chumps like Bam Miller and Tommy Wish after this! This is why I hate this place. Why o need to see it crumble and decay. I can't stop coming back here, over and over, and FAILING!"
Just then, as the crowd continues raining boos down on Chaos and Myst, a commotion in the audience takes all the attention off of them.
HHL: "We might have a fight in the stands here Pip…"
PC: "I don't think that's it… look! It's the gorilla!"
Truly, hopping over the guard rail at ringside is a large black fluffy gorilla!
He hops the railing, then points up at Chaos… then at Myst?
The ape reaches a hand back into the crowd and grabs a hand… of a PINK gorilla!
PC: "Well this is bizarre... Are lady gorillas pink?!"
With the gorilla's help, the pink gorilla climbs over the railing as well and stands side by side with the OG (Original Gorilla).
The two gorillas then climb onto the apron and the black one holds the ropes apart for the pink one. They enter the ring and stand face to face with Jenny and Chaos, and then… they just stand there.
Several long moments pass with tension as thick as mid. Finally, it's Myst who can't take the silence any longer.
"Enough of this dumb shit! Fuck you monkey bitch!"
Jenny swings her hand in a slap, but Pink Gorilla catches her hand… then kicks her hard in the stomach, bending her over! Then…
HHL: "DOUBLE-D DT! Jenny is down, Pip! And I think I see what's going on here! Those aren't real gorillas!"
PC: "It hasn't sunk in for Chaos yet, but it's about to!"
Chaos watches as Jenny gets her head drilled into the ground. Behind him the original gorilla raises his hands to his head and lifts it off!
It's the mask to the gorilla costume!
AND IT'S VINNIE LANE WEARING IT!
Chaos turns back around and he sees Vinnie grinning at him, and then Loverboy cracks Chaos right in the face with a lightning fast superkick!
Chaos is spin around, and now he's face to face with the pink gorilla… who removes her mask to reveal Roxy Cotton!
Cotton drops to one knee and buries an upper ut into Chaos' nether regions, doubling him over.
Vinnie grabs Chaos… BLACK LABEL DRIVER!!!
Chaos and Myst lay side by side, unconscious, as Vinnie and Roxy hug and stand over them.
Finally, Vinnie leans down close to the KO'd Chris Chaos' face and smiles.
"Watch your step, dude!"
Vinnie then steps right on Chaos' chest and he and his fiance leave the ring to enormous cheers.
The entire stadium goes black as the song begins. Slowly, the X-Tron begins to show scarce, glowing embers, the light of each one illuminating smoke growing at the entrance of the ramp. As the song continues, more embers are seen until a large fire is displayed on the screen. The ramp then glows Ned's famous blue, revealing a silhouette in the smoke. Slowly stepping from the fog is none other then Notorious Ned Kaye. He stops for a moment, calming himself in front of the clamoring crowd. He lifts an arm, eyeing the stands to watch the many audience members who follow suit. With a single smile, he drops his arm and rushes towards the ring, slipping in from under the bottom rope, picking himself up immediately.
The bell has rang as the match for the XWF Supercontinental championship begins as both men are being tied up together with a leather strap. The official signals for them to start as Charlie Nickles immediately starts to pull on the strap as in an attempt to get Ned Kaye closer to him. Slapping the strap that he has garnered in his hands across the chest of Ned Kaye.
HHL: Charlie Nickles wasting no time here.
This causes him to stagger backwards as Charlie Nckles wraps the strap around the head of Ned and whips him to the middle of the ring and blasts the strap across the back between the shoulder blades of Ned Kaye. Ned's face immediately goes red as he arches his back in pain. Nickles let's go off the strap and runs towards the ropes before dropping Kaye with a running knee to the face. Nickles loosens the strap as he walks towards the first turnbuckle and slaps the turnbuckle before walking over to the next.
PC: That is one, will Charlie finish this match quickly??
Charlie reaches the second turnbuckle as he touches it, only to have Ned Kaye yanks on the leather strap which forces Nickles back towards the center of the ring. Charlie tries to argue with the ref that he hit the second turnbuckle but the ref insists that he in fact did not.
HHL: If Charlie isn't careful here he might open himself up to attack.
Kaye jumps the middle rope and hits Charlie in the face with the strap.
HHL: Just like that.
Kaye pushes Charlie into the ropes and hits him in the midsection with the strap before dropping him with the strap across the back. Ned then wraps the strap across the throat of Charlie Nickles, attempting to choke him out with it as the official cannot do anything but look on.
HHL: I like this aggressive side of Ned Kaye.
PIP: Clearly the lead in to this match struck a nerve with Ned Kaye.
Nickles instinctively reaches towards the bottom rope in an attempt to break the choke hold but quickly realizes that the official won’t force a break. Kaye quickly wraps the strap across his fist, punching the champion in the forehead with the strap as this forces his face to redden by the impact of each blow. Kaye finally lets go and walks towards the turnbuckles and hits it, walking towards the second turnbuckle and touches the second as well before walking towards the third.
HHL: Knowing that there is no Gorilla anywhere near this ring makes me feel confident that Ned is going to win!
PIP: Are you sure?? Have you checked with backstage??
We see Ned slapping his hand on the third turnbuckle before turning his attention towards the fourth and final turnbuckle. But Charlie has awaited his moment to garner his wits before charging Ned Kaye and clotheslines him out of his boots which sends Ned flying backwards and ruining his attempt to tap all four turnbuckles to be broken. Ned gets dragged across the ring by Nickles as he touches the first top turnbuckle before turning his attention towards the second. In the process that Ned Kaye gets dragged around gives Ned to tap the first turnbuckle as well as he hits the bottom turnbuckle.
HHL: Both men have touched a turnbuckle, it’s going to be interesting as I don’t think Charlie is aware of what is going on.[/color]
PIP: Someone should probably tell Charlie before he loses to a guy like Ned Kaye.
[red]HHL: What's that supposed to mean? A guy like Ned Kaye?
PIP: What? Nothing. Nothing. By the way did I ever tell you Happy Thanksgiving?
Charlie walks towards the second turnbuckle and hits it with his hand as he is now leading the score two to one, but only to have Ned manage to tap the second turnbuckle as well before managing to get to his feet. There he drags himself closer towards the unsuspected Charlie Nickles by using the strap as leverage so to speak. An unsuspecting Charlie touches the third turnbuckle before Ned also does the same.
Just as Ned's hand smashes the third turnbuckle Nickles turns around to see Ned staring back at him with a shit eating grin that could light up even the Grinches heart.
HHL: Uh oh. Looks like Charlie has finally figured it out!!!!
PIP: But by now it is already too late!!!! Damn it Charlie. Don't do this to me.
Ned uses all of his power to prevent Charlie from tapping the fourth and final turnbuckle as he is merely inches away from it. Ned is closing in on him before jumping on Nickles his back. There he wraps his arms around his head in a sleeper hold as Charlie closes in on the turnbuckle.
HHL:What is going to happen next???
Charlie is slowly fading as he is getting closer and closer to the turnbuckle. Ned is wrapping his legs around the midsection of Charlie in an attempt to make breathing even more difficult for the Supercontinental Champion. Charlie's eyelids are fluttering as he's slowly fading as he is nearly standing still but his feet are moving inch by inch closer towards the designated final turnbuckle as Ned continues to sinch that sleeper hold in even tighter.
HHL: This isn't looking good for Charlie.
PIP: No Charlie. Don't do this to me.
Charlie Nickles is now swaying like a lonely tree in the forest. He's trying to inhale deeply before dropping to a knee because of the sleeper hold that Ned has got on him. The fans are watching on as the eyes are slowly closing. Nickles falls to the mat as Ned Kaye stretches out and slams the final turnbuckle with his right hand securing the Supercontinental Championship!
HHL: Told ya!!!
PIP: God Damnit!
Winner AND NEW XWF SUPERCONTINETNAL CHAMPION - NED KAYE
The fans all rise to their feet as a bruised and battered Theo Pryce joined by Raion Kido and Jason Cashe appear at the top of the stage.
The trio make their way down to the ring as the referee releases the locking mechanism on both Charlie Nickles and Ned Kaye's wrists.
Kido and Cashe climb into the ring first and help their Trilogy brethren up this feet as Theo Pryce grabs the Supercontinental Championship from the ring announcer. Pryce ascends the ring steps and climbs into the ring as Cashe and Kido raise Ned's hand in victory.
Theo doesn't say anything instead he simply places the title around Ned's waist and then steps to the side so that Ned can enjoy the moment he worked hard for.
The cheers continue for a few moments before Theo pulls a mic out from his pocket.
Ned, you have earned this championship. You've fought long and hard to get here and we are all proud of you. You earned this the right way. I am excited to see what you can do as the Supercontinental Champion however the XWF is going to be going through some big changes in 2023. Wednesday Night Warfare and Saturday Night Savage will be merging into one show to give us Weekend Warfare airing every other Saturday Night.
The fans respond with a mix of cheers and boos but mostly cheers.
Hey I get it. Less shows means less of seeing your favorite XWF superstars but not really because we are going to treat every single edition of Weekend Warfare like a mini Pay Per View. However because we are merging shows we now have a championship problem, as in we have one too many titles. So what we are going to do on the final Wednesday Night Warfare of 2022 is have a title unification match.
XWF Television Champion Isaiah King will face XWF Supercontinental Champion. The winner will walk out the new XWF Television Champion. Good luck to you Ned and good luck to Isaiah.
Theo pat's Ned on the back as he looks on in somewhat disbelief after hearing the news of a title unification as Bad Medicine heads to break.
The lights in the building start to flicker, matching the opening riffs and drums of Disturbed's 'The Infection'. After the intro, a brief pyro explosion goes off in the entrance and as lyrics of the song begin, Xavier Lux steps out from behind the smoke left by the pyro. He stands there sporting his finest black and green gear and a black CCPE T-shirt. He looks around at the crowd who give him a mix reaction, not knowing which "Venom" is going to show up tonight. He focuses on those that do cheer, and even try to fight the boos with a brief “Venom! Venom!” chant. He smirks before making his way down the ramp, keeping his focus on the ring. Once he gets to ringside, he hops on the apron, wiping his boots, showing his respect to the canvas where he is about to practice his craft. He then gets inside and makes his way to the corner, climbs to the second turnbuckle and again just looks around at the crowd who is still giving him a mix reaction. He takes off his CCPE T-shirt, and acknowledges a fan here and there and picks one whom he tosses the t-shirt too. He then hops down from the ring, checks in with the ref and then gets ready for the match as his music dies down.
The words fade as we hear the Church bells cling before the guitar riff starts playing along with the choir singing. The music builds up to where finally Corey Taylor can be heard. The name Goth emerges upon the titan tron, but the man only walks out after Corey Taylor can be heard screaming the words: “I’m finally holding on to letting go!!” As explosions go off on the side of the entrance stage. Goth stares at the crowd as his fiancé Melissa emerges behind him.
Goth lifts his head upwards to the ceiling while extending his arms, a smirk emerges upon his face as he listens to the mixed reactions. After a few seconds he looks back ahead of him towards the ring walking slowly, totally ignoring the fans who are trying to touch him as he walks to the steel ringsteps. He gets on the ring apron before opening up the top and middle ring rope for his fiancé Melissa as she steps through them. He then steps in the ring and stares down his opponent/awaits his opponent as his music slowly fades.
Jenny Myst skips her way to the ring with the Xtreme title delicately placed on her waist.
There is a trash can filled with weapons on the outside of the ring. Conveniently placed due to the graphic nature of this match. Jenny steps into the ring and unstraps the belt from her waist.
Heather: This is going to be the biggest test yet for the Queen of X-Treme. She has been in some high profile matches in her career, but this one is the pinnacle.
Pip: If you’re watching at home, it may be time to put the kids to bed. This one is NOT going to be for the weak at heart. Or stomach.
Jenny hands the belt to the ref, and her eyes bounce back and forth between the two competitors standing across from her.
Pip: Jenny Myst has been notoriously good at winning titles, especially recently. Her achilles heel has been keeping them. She has a chance to do that tonight.
Heather: And in brutal fashion, too. But to her credit we have seen her survive in some pretty awful conditions.
The bell rings, and Jenny charges the two men before they can get their bearings. She begins to fire off rapid fire blows to the much larger Goth. He is massive by comparison at 6’4” 240. She is barely 5 feet. Punches to the chest and torso seem to have little effect as he tosses her off. Lux, however, picks up where she left off and begins to chop Goth, backing him into the corner. Goth brings a big clubbing hand down over the head of Lux, and he stumbles back to the middle of the ring. Jenny is back to her feet and hits a standing drop kick on Lux, dropping him to his back in the center of the ring. She then runs full speed at Goth again, who connects with a big boot. Jenny is flat on her back now as Lux gets up and charges. Goth knocks him down.
Picking Jenny up by the hair, he throws her into the corner. Lux gets back to his feet and Goth is ready, ducking under a spinning heel kick and lifting Xavier Lux over his head, dropping him hard with a scoop slam.
Jenny, who is learning on the fly, realizes her charge hasn’t worked twice. This time she charges and stops right before she gets to Goth. He goes for a boot, she drops low and takes out the knee with a chop block.
Pip: So far, nothing extreme to write home about but Goth’s size and physicality has dominated the early going.
Heather: Jenny realized she needs to take the base of gravity away, keep Goth horizontal if she wants to retain her.
After taking him to a knee with a chop block she comes off the ropes with a flying knee to the face, taking him to his back. She spins back around only to get a hard shot from Lux which drops her. She rolls out of the ring as he turns his sights to Goth.
He picks Goth up and whips him into the corner. This is followed by a European uppercut, then he moves back out to the middle of the ring. He runs again and splashes Goth, A second time. Third. And ask he is going for his forth there is a lout crack.
WHHHHAAAAAAAAACKKKKK
Jenny delivers a blow to the back of Lux’s knee this time, with a kendo stick. She hits him again, and again, and again on the legs. All legal. Goth makes his way out of the corner, and she whips around to smack him with it. He grabs the kendo stick in his big hand and his strength is able to bend Jenny back. She’s really pushing hard but he has so much more upper body strength. Jenny is bent nearly all the way back, the back of her head touching the mat. Goth has a creepy smile on his face.
Pip: This has to be wreaking havoc on that surgically repaired back of hers!
Jenny is wincing as Goth presses harder, putting even more strain on that back. Just then, Xavier comes off the ropes with a leg drop across the sternum of Jenny. She immediately drops to the mat and drops the stick. He grabs it and in one motion, delivers a strike to that knee Jenny took out with the chop block. He goes down to one knee again and Lux explodes out of his stance, off the ropes and connects with a scissors kick! Goth is down!
1……..
2………..
The big man gets a shoulder up.
Lux gives her signature “this close” pose before lifting him up to his feet. He whips him back into the corner again. Jenny is back to her feet now and joins him in the corner as they both whip Goth into the far one. Jenny runs and cartwheels into a back elbow, connecting. Lux follows it up with a running forearm, and the big man stumbles into the center of the ring. Jenny runs out and bulldogs Goth, planting him face down in the center of the mat. Lux clubs Jenny in the back of the head and pins Goth when she stumbles away.
1
2
Jenny breaks up the fall.
”NO! This is MY belt! MIIINNEE!”
She hauls off and slaps Lux.
OOOOHHHHHHHHH from the Kansas City crowd.
Lux has a look in his eye that could kill.
Pip: Uh oh.
Lux grabs Jenny by the hair, as if trying to rip it off. He walks her over, by the hair, to the turnbuckle and bouncer her face off of it. Twice. Three times. Four. Five. Six. Seven. Eight. Nine……Ten times. The crowd chanted along, counting out the numbers.
Jenny is woozy, stumbling out to the middle of the ring. Lux picks her up and drops her on her back with a scoop slam.
Goth is back to his feet and Lux comes off the ropes with a hurricanrana which sends Goth through the ropes and tumbling to the outside.
Heather: Xavier Lux is feeling it now. He is looking to make a statement in Kansas City and he has all the momentum!
Jenny is getting back up and Lux comes off the ropes with a flying knee. Jenny is flat on her back. Lux hooks the leg.
1
2
3—Jenny gets a shoulder up!
[white]Pip: The first three pin attempts of this match have all come from Lux. He is trying to steal one early here, but both of these competitors know what's at stake. It's gonna take a lot more than that!
Lux curls his lip, frustrated that he couldn’t put Jenny away. He picks her up by the hair again, but this time, perhaps out of desperation, she spits.
BLACK GOO!!!!!!!!!
The black gooey mist to the face of Lux! He grabs his eyes and steps back. Jenny sweeps the legs, taking them out from under him. She bounces off the ropes.
INSULT TO INJURY!
The knees to the chest and stomach as Lux curls up. Goth is on his feet outside the ring. Jenny sees this and runs, baseball sliding and connecting, sending Goth back against the barricade. Jenny looks back at Lux and then down at Goth. Her eyes shoot over to the trash can filled with toys.
Her face lights up.
Pip: Oh boy. The crazy one just remembered the toy chest!
She rolls out of the ring and walks over to the trash can, dumping it out and creating a pile of weapons on the mat. Goth gets up and makes his way over to her. Jenny has a baseball bat in hand with a big grin when she turns around and bumps into Goth. He fires a big shot to the face. She swings the bat off her back foot. Goth ducks. The wooden bat breaks over the ring post. Goth lifts her up under the shoulders and throws her back first into the post.
OHHHHH from the crowd as Jenny slumps, holding her back. He then begins to rummage through the weapons pile and takes his eyes off the ring. He doesn’t see Lux on his feet. Jenny grabs the apron and gets herself back up, also. She is standing next to Goth when Lux springboards off the top rope! Cross body! He takes them both out as all three crash INTO the weapons pile!
Lux, still a bit blinded and his face stained from the tar Jenny spit, is stirring first. He crawls on all fours, reaching out. His hands make contact with a hammer. He grabs it. Jenny, who only got clipped from the springboard, charges,. Lux swings and connects with the mid section of Myst, driving the hammer into her stomach. She groans and goes down, holding her middle. Lux gets back to his feet as Goth gets up. Lux swings the hammer, but Goth grabs it in his big palm. He twists Lux’s wrist until he drops it, then locks him in a full nelson sleeper.
Pip: The extreme action picking up here but Goth is going old school. He wants to wear his opponents down the traditional way with his size and strength.
Heather: I am not sure that is the hill he wants to die on with a very scrappy Lux and a certifiably insane Myst lingering.
Lux is wiggling, trying to get out of it. Goth lifts his arms, taking him off his feet but Lux is able to get back to a standing position. He lifts him again, but Lux is trying to counter with a stunner or neck breaker, but Goth has a tight hold.
Jenny is crawling, holding her stomach, and reaches under the ring. She tosses a bag out, but keeps digging. Lux kicks a leg back, and connects with the groin of Goth, who breaks the hold temporarily. He hits a standing drop kick to shove Goth back against the apron. He makes a power move towards him but Goth catches him, delivering a spine buster onto the announce table!
Goth looks down at Lux with a brooding look as he winces, holding his back. He smirks as he turns around…….
INTO A STEEL CHAIR SHOT FROM MYST!
Goth drops. Jenny brings the chair down again, smacking him across the front of his body. She has a deranged look in her eye now as she locks his ankle into the chair.
Pip: Talk about taking out a center of gravity, Myst wants to shatter that ankle right here and now!
She is on the top step of the steel stairs. She jumps, looking to land on that chair and destroy Goth’s ankle.
LUX WITH A SUPERKICK!
He connects in mid air and Jenny flies back! Lux came out of nowhere!
Goth comes to life and takes his foot out of the chair. Lux stomps on him twice but the big man is determined to get up. He continues to stop and punch at Goth, but the big man gets to his feet. Lux reaches into the scattered pile and grabs a wrench. He brings the wrench down over the back of Goth, but it doesn’t deter him that much as he keeps getting up. Lux brings the wrench down again. Goth is on one knee. Lux picks up the chair that was once wrapped around Goth’s ankle and cracks it across his back. This puts Goth face down for the moment and Lux is about to swing again when Jenny grabs the chair from behind. He spins around to a kick in the gut. Dropping the chair Jenny locks him in.
GO TO HELL!
Jenny hits a monstrous spike DDT onto the steel chair! Lux is out cold! Jenny reaches down and empties the bag she pulled out from under the ring. Thumbtacks.
Falling out of the bag is also a pocket knife and a set of nunchucks.
She picks up the nunchucks.
She makes her way over to Goth, who is back up to one knee now, and wraps the chain separating the nunchucks around his neck, creating a makeshift garrott.
She pulls back hard as Goth reaches his hands up to try to get it off.
Pip: This is the same way she won the title the first time. She choked out Atara with barbed wire! She is going to choke the life out of Goth here!
Heather: Goth has NEVER tapped out! He would rather pass out! Jenny is gonna have to still pin him even after all this effort!
She pulls, and Goth is fading a little. Lux starts to stir on the other side of the ring. She side-eyes Lux, seeing him coming to. This makes her pull harder, but Goth, being so much bigger and stronger than Jenny, is getting to his feet. After about 30 seconds, he is standing up, Myst on his back in Piggy Back position, still with the nunchuck chair wrapped around his neck. He flips her off his back. She lands back first on the mat outside, in a sitting position. Goth kicks her hard right in the middle of the back. He rips the nunchuck chain off his neck and throws it down. He is clearly incensed. He picks up Jenny and whips her into the steel steps. Lux comes flying, stepping up onto the steps and hits an enziguri, connecting hard wit the side of the head of Goth.
Back and forth the action goes. Jenny crawls away, holding her back. Lux rips the top off the announce table.
Pip: Hey! What are you doing!
Lux ignores him. He pulls out the TV monitors and tosses them. Goth, who refuses to stay down, is back up. Lux fires a few hard shots, to knock him back onto the table. Lux puts a chair on top of Goth and looks at the top rope. He climbs into the ring and pumps up the crowd as he makes it known he is going to the top. The crowd roars.
Jenny, however, has different plans.
She is in the ring, and when Lux goes to climb she shakes the ropes. He straddles them, his nuts taking the brunt of the impact. He flips over and lands on the apron. She runs and bounces off the ropes, knocking him off the apron and to the mat below…….
RIGHT ONTO THE THUMBTACKS!
Pip: Good god! The Queen of X-Treme has just turned Xavier Lux into a human pin cushion!
She then climbs to the top to vulture the move he was about to do, and leap off on top of Goth. But she took too much time.
She jumps but Goth is up. He catches Jenny in mid air.
Turning…..still holding the flailing girl.
POWERBOMB THROUGH THE ANNOUNCE TABLE!
Jenny is damn near broken in half as after all the chaos, Goth is the one who emerges on his feet. Lux is getting back to his feet, his entire back side of his body covered in shiny metal. Blood runs from the small wounds.
Goth doesn’t cover Myst, however. Instead he sifts through the wreckage to find something to go after Lux with.
Myst doesn’t move.
Pip: Not sure if it’s the smartest move not pinning Myst here, Goth has this match won! Its falls count anywhere and getting her down isn’t easy. This may come back to bite him!
He grabs a piece of rebar.
Lux, still woozy, is back to his feet. Goth delivers a hard shot to Lux’s midsection and then runs him head first into the barricade. Keeping on offense, Goth pulls a table out from under the ring. He sets it up inside the ring, propped in the corner.
Rolling back out of the ring he grabs Lux as he gets up to one knee and powers him into the barricade again. Myst is crawling slowly out of the table rubble. Goth proceeds to bounce Lux off of everything around the ring. He notices Myst getting up. After tossing Lux into the ring post he walks over to Myst. He picks her up by the hair. Myst, a savvy veteran who always has a trick up her sleeve, is ready. She whips out her trust mace canister from her bra. She sprays Goth. Picking up a television monitor that lay nearby she lays the big man out with a shot across the face. Lux is back up and swings, missing, and Myst flips him over her back and onto Goth.
Goth’s shoulders are down. The ref slides into the count.
1
2
Myst notices at the last second and breaks it up. She yells at the ref.
MY TITLE!
She shoves the ref. He can’t DQ her but warns her not to do it again. She pulls Lux off Goth and rolls him into the ring. She pulls another table out and slides it into the ring. She begins setting it up as Lux uses the ropes to get to his feet. She hauls off and kicks him in the side, and then pulls him up. A hard right hand, backs him into the corner. Goth is stirring on the outside, but still weary.
She begins to fire shots off to the head and midsection of Lux, then grabs his arm and Irish whips him into the corner. He stops himself before he goes through the table but turns around into a standing drop kick. This shoves him back against it but it doesn’t break. Jenny is back up. She looks out at the crowd that is on their feet. She then yells and charges Lux.
Just before she crashes through him Goth grabs his feet and pulls him down. Jenny stops herself before she goes through the table. She slides out of the ring and runs up the steps jumping off and crashing into Goth with a hard forearm. He stumbles back against the barricade. Blood runs down his face as he is busted open from the monitor shot. She runs and jumps, Goth catches her but Jenny uses her momentum and hits a Tilt-a-whirl headscissors takedown. Lux is up and he lays Jenny out with a clothesline.
Heather: Nobody can seem to get the upper hand in this match! Just when it seems like one of them is going to put it away, something crazy happens! Man, it's chaotic!
Pip: Don’t say his name, Heather! You know that makes him appear!
Lux picks up Goth and scoop slams him on top of the trash can. He senses the end is near. Jenny is suddenly nowhere to be seen. He looks around quick then decides to climb the top rope. He is going for a Frogsplash off the top onto Goth when suddenly an explosion!!!!!!!
Pink mist begins to engulf the ringside area. Lux, on the top rope begins to cough and climbs down. The middle of the ring is where the mist is the thicket. We can barely make him out as he wanders into it, coughing.
Just then the smoke dissipates and we see a doll with a silver belt sitting in the corner. Jenny pops up behind Lux and decks him with what appears to be brass knuckles. He drops. Jenny then picks him up and whips him THROUGH THE TABLE IN THE CORNER!!!!!!
WHAT IMPACT! THE TABLE SHATTERED AND LUX IS BENT DAMN NEAR IN HALF!
Goth is in the ring, and staring at the doll. He is almost in a trance, mesmerized by it. Jenny grins, rolling out of the ring. She rolls back in behind Goth as he walks towards the doll. Something is calling him to it……..
Up on the X-Tron is a picture of his wife’s grave. The horsehead Chaos had dropped in it and the top of the coffin that looks like someone took an ax to it. A series of images from Goth’s life cycle over the screen in rapid succession. He goes into a frenzy, yelling. He grabs the dolls and rips its head off, the stuffing popping out. He drops it and begins to stomp on it. He turns around and…….
WHACKKKKKKKKKKKKK
Jenny hits him across the face with a shovel!
Pip: Dear god! Jenny just laid out goth with a shovel! He’s gotta be concussed!
She picks him up and lays him on the table she set up. She climbs to the top rope.
The crowd roars as Jenny makes the belt symbol around her waist. She snarls and then jumps.
IDENTITY CRISIS! 450 splash off the top rope THROUGH Goth THROUGH the table!
HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!
She crawls over, laying a hand over Goth’s chest.
1
2
3!
Pip: She did it! Jenny Myst did it! And most importantly, she did it by herself! No help from Chaos or Martin anywhere in sight! Jenny retains in one of the most chaotic and brutal matches we have seen in a long time!
Heather: She hasn’t been able to retain her belts until now! The Queen of X-Treme is the real deal, Pip!
Winner and STILL XWF Xtreme Champion - Jenny Myst
The ref holds her hand up as she holds her belt high above her head, blood running down her face. She looks back at the carnage around the ring and the broken bodies of Lux and Goth, before rolling out of the ring and making her way up the ramp.
Micheal Graves walks to the ring to a mixed reaction, jaw-jacking with front row fans along the way! Mikey rolls into the ring and sits in the corner as he waits for this match to begin!
Comes out in a dazzling blue robe. Across the back, it says "King of the Midcarders". He has no expression and makes no eye contact with his opponent. When the bell rings, he shifts gear and a snarl comes across his face.
The intimidating sight of the Aggro Crag looms over our competitors who stand looking up at the structure.
Tonight's official HoloRef Dot Gif fazes into reality above the mountain like a wizard peering into his orb.
PIP: That's fucking radical.
HHL: Won't argue there, Pip, but let's see which challenger tonight has the GUTS to conquer the aggro-crag and snatch the coveted Universal Championship!
PIP: HA! Guts... I get it. Before this giant pink woman starts the match Heather, who do you think has an advantage in this match?
HHL: My head says Mark Flynn, the creator of the optimal path obviously knows how to ascend it but you can never count out Graves, coming back from a neck injury quicker than Dick Powers could rise from the grave is one hell of a feat.
PIP: You're not wrong. From a pure power perspective, I would say Graves has the upper hand plus he has his bag of tricks to reach into in case Flynn's on the upper foot, but Mark Flynn has been known as, and I quote, the slippery weasel of the XWF! He's quick, nimble and deadly.
HHL: ... Are weasels deadly?
PIP: They are at my height, Heather.
HoloRef blows an incorporeal whistle and the Aggro Crag comes to life, light emitting from the structure along with bursts of hot steam and fire which receives an almighty pop from the crowd. The champion Mark Flynn and challenger Micheal Graves set off, Flynn heads directly forward to ascend but Graves don't play no shit and immediately gets onto Flynn's heels! Graves grabs Flynn at the ankles and whips him off the first ledge and spins him around slamming Flynn against the ledge and he flops onto the ground grabbing his spine; Graves places a boot onto Flynn's face and slowly steps ontop of him to begin his ascent; as Gravy gets an early start he is blocked by pillars of steam and changes direction to get up again but Flynn is on his tail and gets a hand on Graves shoulder pulling him back as Gravy tries to swat Flynn away with a wild back elbow, the champ ducks and manages to get his forearm under Gravy's chin and pushes the challenger back into the wall. Graves lifts his knee and lifts Flynn upward with a knee strike but Flynn doesn't release his hold against Graves; Flynn transitions hooking under Gravy's arm and whipping around and locking Gravy's arm from behind, Flynn then grabs a handful of Graves' hair and pushes him forward as a jet stream of steam blast Gravy in the face!
Micheal lets out a long, death-rattling scream and as the steam dissipates we see Graves' face burns a bright red, his skin appearing blistered already as Flynn throws a heavy kick into the side of Graves' knee and wretches him backwards landing a solid knee into the back of Gravy's neck!
The Dark Warrior lets out a choked groan of agony which almost makes you feel sorry for him... Almost. But Flynn does not let up, keeping his hold on his opponent, Flynn wraps a strong arm around Graves and locks him in a headlock, Gravy still looking up at the lights as his vision comes back, Mark wretches at the neck, like a dog ravages a chew toy, he throws Graves' body to-and-fro before snapping it back down with a crunch and ending his chain by pushing Graves' back up and forward before slamming him back down on the ground with a horrendous German Suplex! Flynn making sure Gravy lands hard onto his neck on the ledge below, despite hurting his back on the hard material of the Aggro Crag!
Graves flinches on the ground grabbing his neck as Flynn hisses in pain rolling off his back.
PIP: Flynn playing smart using Graves' neck injury to his advantage.
HHL: Painful for sure but Gravy getting an early injury on Flynn's back slows down his mobility, if Flynn wants to slow down Gravy he's gonna have to break that neck again.
PIP: That seems like his plan, that beautiful malicious bastard.
Flynn is first to get to his feet and begins to ascend as snow buffets the Aggro Crag, HoloRef Dot Gif manoeuvres around the structure to take a closer look at Gravy who looks up to her and panicking, understandably, before realising his surroundings and searching for Flynn amongst the many distractions, upon finding him several feet above him, Graves sprints to action.
Flynn is on a thin ledge, he shimmies across stopping as flame spurts in intervals. Flynn sneers, looking around to find where his opponent is. Graves on the other hand was blocked step by step by steam and fire, plus the snow isn't helping visibility at this point and has scaled around to a long gap of the Aggro Crag, Graves looks around and makes a few steps back before sprinting forward and jumping into the air, leaping over the gap and rolling to his feet on the opposite side before jumping up to a ledge and pulling himself up. As Flynn moves past the fire he finds himself on steady footing and meets a rock wall but his eyes dart to the fingers of Graves pursed on the edge and the challenger comes into view, the two lock eyes and Flynn launches into a baseball slide but Graves' ducks down and Flynn's legs hover above Graves' head who throws an arm up and grabs the first thing he lands on, which unfortunately for Flynn happens to be his Optimal Parts; The champ groans in pain as Graves put his full weight behind him pushes himself up and scales the ledge, climbing over Flynn's body with a sinister smile and wraps his hands onto the side of Flynn's face before firing Yellow mist directly into the champion's face from inches away!
HHL: Oh shit! This is starting to look bad for the champ!"
PIP: Yellow Mist AKA Piss Mist paralyzes an opponent; if Gravy is quick enough he could win this match before Flynn can regain muscle control.
As Mark Flynn's body begins to seize, his muscles cramping as he stares into Graves' laughing maw above him; Micheal gives a slap of the cheek to Flynn before stepping off but stops at the rock wall and slowly turns to Flynn's spasming body, the champ staring at Gravy with burning coal for eyes hidden behind a splash of putrid yellow. Gravy smiles to himself and begins to laugh maniacally walking over to Flynn and placing a boot on the champ's shoulder as he looks around at the crowd and then to the long drop below.
HHL: This really really doesn't look good for The Most Hated Man in the XWF! Won't kill him but will drop him back long enough for Micheal Graves to get a huuuuge advantage.
Graves lets the moment sink in as he takes a deep breath in and looks down at Flynn who smiles back to the shock of Gravy and before he can react, Flynn returns the favor from before with a low blow of his own! The crowd pop huge as Flynn begins to step up to his feet.
HHL: WHAT!? How is Flynn standing!? Did he Princess Bride Graves by micro-dosing yellow mist!?
Flynn stumbles on his feet and begins to laugh peeling the thin layer of a face mask from him!
PIP: AH! He Batman & Robin'd him! Rubber lips are immune to your charms, bitch!
Mark Flynn throws away the residue as he splits the crowd, some being impressed with Flynn's genius the others booing at the obvious cop-out. Gravy holds his groin before anger replaces the pain and the two reach at each other, sharing blows! A mean right hook from Graves is returned by Flynn, a chop from the champ, a headbutt from the challenger and the two lay into each other as the crowd raise in anticipation, cheering each competitor on before Gravy takes advantage and makes the champ stumble a hellacious haymaker!
Flynn almost falls off the structure as he waves his arm to keep steady and Graves seals his fall with a brogue kick! Flynn's head snaps back with a deafening sound of boot meeting flesh and Flynn falls from where Graves climbed; The Dark Warrior takes a moment to breathe and readjusts his neck before beginning his ascent up the rock wall.
HoloRef peeks in closer on the champ to see if he can continue as a weak groan leaves his mouth as he struggles to pick himself up; the fall doing further damage to his back.
Graves gets to the top of the rock wall and his prize is finally in sight! But there's still a long way to the top, Graves feet begin to buckle as the Aggro Crag shakes and boulders fall from the peak!
Down below, Flynn gets to his feet and arches his back with a grimace as he almost falls over with the quaking of the structure. Flynn dodges oncoming rocks as he makes his way up the ledge with a painful groan and rushes up the rock wall. Meanwhile, Gravy is in a tight spot, facing a sheer wall with a rope he begins to climb up the rope only to be bludgeoned by oncoming rocks which slow his ascent drastically, one landing on his face and opening a gash above his eyebrow, knocking him down as he howls burning his hands on the rope. Flynn gets to the top of the rock wall and looks around unable to find Graves who is on the opposite side of the Aggro Crag at this point; Flynn darts to the left and meets ledges jolting from the side with short gaps between them, as rocks fall past, the champ makes small, precise hops to get to the other side, barely dodging the avalanche. A rock manages to catch Flynn mid-jump and the crowd let out a gasp as Flynn is sent of his trajectory and crashes against a platform, winding himself as his sternum plants into the ledge. He manages to stay on as he slowly and arduously gets himself up.
Gravy manages to get ascend the rope and begins to pull it up, leaving it at the top so Flynn has no way up if he does come his way. Gravy then walks around the structure waiting as bursts of fire shoot from the wall in rhythm, Gravy waits impatiently before running full force getting grazed by the spitting flames and pats himself out as he reaches a corner.
Mark Flynn has moved past the gaps and climbs smaller ledges, dodging rocks, steam and fire as he moves around the mountain before meeting Graves once more.
The two are on opposite sides of each other and in between them is a series of platforms, on each side is a platform moving back and forth and in the middle a long platform which leads to their ascent. Making deep breaths, each competitor waits for their platforms to reach them and each hop on, their eyes locked on one another. Graves takes the first step onto the center platform which begins to shift to his weight as it see-saws and almost throws him off; Gravy scrambles forward as Flynn jumps up on gets his hands onto the platform and pulls himself up as the weight shifts and centers itself briefly before moving to Flynn's side as Gravy gets close to the center and makes a move to the ledge above but Flynn jumps high into the air and Graves moves back before Flynn lands and shifts the platform again forcing Graves to tumble and roll towards Flynn who jumps over Graves and gets to the ledge first! Graves quickly gets to his feet and is forced back downwards but manages to make it to the ledge along with Flynn!
The two step up at the same time and Graves wastes no time with a throat punch! The champ stumbles back hacking up a lung as Gravy runs forward towards the peak but Flynn wastes no time grabbing a large rock and hurling it at the back of Gravy's head which knocks him to a knee; Flynn rushes his opponent and raises up a knee but Gravy turns in time to avoid the attack and throws out his hands to catch Flynn mid-air and drops the champ with an improvised chokeslam! Flynn hisses in pain on the ground as Graves grabs Flynn by the ear and pulls him up; hooking his arms around his own and nails Flynn with a nasty headbutt!
And another!
AND ANOTHER!
AND ANOTHER!!!
The final busting Flynn's nose wide open as blood begins to spill out of his nostrils, in a drunken daze Flynn gives a bloody smile before spitting a glob of blood into Gravy's eyes which causes him to release the champ. Graves wipes the blood from his eyes and licks the red from around his mouth. Flynn is on his hands and knees and Graves stomps down onto Flynn's spine who lets out a blood-curdling scream, Graves then grabs the back of Flynn's head and begins to rub his face around on the rough ground of the Aggro Crag, Flynn letting out a muffled scream as he faces is torn.
HHL: Jesus, this is brutal.
Graves lifts Flynn's head up and gets into Flynn's face shouting absurdities and disrespecting the champ but Flynn stops it short and rakes his nails across Graves' eyes! Gravy screams in pain as he stumbles back, gashes appearing on Gravy's red, blistered face. Flynn gets to his knees and controls his breathing, puking out a mouthful of blood as he slowly gets to his feet, he seizes as he straightens out his spine and hobbles towards a blind Graves with an awkward posture.
Graves swats wildly; unable to hear Flynn's approach as the steam and fire bellow around the peak. Flynn leaves bloody imprints in the snow around him as he gets to his opponent and grabs a handful of air and wretches Graves forward who lets out a cry of pain and Flynn throws an elbow into the back of Graves' neck over and over and over and over! Brutally stabbing his elbow down as the crowd grow scared and quiet, watching Flynn's malice as he roars with each hit getting quicker and quicker.
PIP: Okay, now this is getting too much.
HoloRef seems like a poor choice as she is incorporeal and cannot pull Flynn away who does eventually stop as Gravy falls down on the ground, unmoving. Flynn drops The Dark Warrior as the crowd is silent; the champ stumbles towards the peak and his Universal Champion is mere feet away, a smile appears from the fountain of blood covering his face.
Mark Flynn slowly gets to the title and reaches out for it.
But is stopped!
As Micheal Graves slams into him and shouts into his ear as he hangs on Flynn's back.
"Told you, you hit like a bitch!"
The two roar as Flynn throws an elbow back and this brings the crowd back to life!
Graves dodges the hit and Flynn exposes his back to Graves! A cheap kidney punch causes a reprise and Graves takes advantage!
HHL: Graves has him up!
Micheal Graves sets Flynn up into his Grave Consequences!!!
But Graves doesn't throw Flynn down, instead he moves towards the edge!
PIP: Graves wants to throw Flynn down the Aggro Crag!!!
Graves makes his way towards the edge as the crowd reach maximum hype! And as Graves is about to release!
FLYNN GETS AN ARM FREE!!!
HE SLIPS FREE AND GETS AN ARM AROUND MICHEAL GRAVES NECK!!!
AND AS HIS FEET HIT THE GROUND....
HHL: FRONT FACE-LOCK FROM FLYNN!
PIP: WHICH CAN ONLY LEAD TO!!!
THE END
The suplex cutter drops Graves who lies motionless in the snow and Flynn begins to crawl towards the title, the crowd getting behind him.
And as Flynn reaches the pedestal after what feels like an eternity.
He gets a hand on the Universal Championship!!
AND!!!
HE GRABS IT! PULLING IT CLOSE TO HIS CHEST!!!
DING! DING DING!!!!
WINNER AND STILL UNIVERSAL CHAMPION - MARK FLYNN!!!
The crowd erupt as a final burst of steam and fire explodes from everywhere and Mark Flynn's theme plays while snow falls like confetti celebrating his hard-fought win.
HHL: Mark Flynn retains! And hot damn what a match! I don't think anyone could have gone through the punishment Micheal Graves gave but Flynn showed up and Flynn got the win!!!
PIP: It was a tough match, Graves brought it but Mark Flynn proves why he's at the top of the mountain.
And with that, Bad Medicine fades to black holding on Mark Flynn howling manically with his title close to his chest.
JOIN US ON SUNDAY JANUARY 29TH...
LIVE FROM U.S. BANK STADIUM IN MINNEAPOLIS, MINNESOTA FOR...
Special Thanks To:
Finn Kuhn
Charlie Nickles
Chris Chaos
Goth
Chris Page
Gator
Mark Flynn
SBW
Marf
Vinnie Lane
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