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Hanari Carnes · (07-03-2019)

The moonlight was always so beautiful in the Dominican Republic. The way it made the water glisten, the way it lit up the landscape just enough to cast shadows but not quite enough to show detail. The moonlight was a criminals best friend. The moonlight was when the real hero's showed their colors.

The car sat idling, down by the water. There was an apartment complex on the beach with balconies facing the open Atlantic. The plants were neatly trimmed, the flowers all boxed and potted, standing up straight in their arrangements and flaunting the full spectrum of their beauty. All of the rails, balconies, the building itself, was recently painted, making it sign illustriously in the off-white color of the moon.

Tourists were the ones who destroyed this place. American's, in specific. They would leave trash everywhere. They littered the beach outside of the hotel with their empty water bottles, saran-wrap from their various food items they brought with them, and discarded plastic and aluminum that they felt they were too good to take with them and throw out. American's had a habit of this---thinking they are too good to be bothered. Coming into someone else's home and leaving a wasteland behind them, with the smug attitude and the general belief that a "third world" country isn't worthy of common courtesy and generosity. A third world country that they traveled to, mind you.

The car sat idling down by the water. Hanari was in the driver seat, looking out on the shadow-cast beach, listening to the waves roll in through his open passenger seat window. The beach was littered again, but this time with men, women and even some children, who were scowering the ravished landscape for any sort of valuable that was left behind. Sometimes the American's, in their laziness, would drop a gold or silver jewelry piece or leave behind a set of headphones that they just chalked up as a casualty to the sand. These people lived off American greed. They got no money from the hotels, no money from the expensive dinners and over priced rental cars. They got no money from the copious amounts of alcohol consumed.

These people lived on what was left behind.

It pained Hanari to see the people of his great nation living solely on the discarded "waste" of the big brother up North. It pained Hanari to see people base their entire existence on savaging for items that American's didn't care enough to take with them. It pained Hanari to see the Dominican being slandered in the news by American's, being labeled as "unsafe" and "dangerous." It pained Hanari to see these people dig through the sand like Hermit Crabs to find something, anything, to feed their families with.

On this particular night, there was nothing more than a few items spread out. Nothing of substance. American's have stopped coming to the Dominican in droves after a few negative news stories. Hanari found a smile cracking across his face. He felt his lips turn into a sneer as he saw a man in ragged clothes lift what looked to be a half-eaten sandwich out of the sand. The half-empty hotel with the fresh coat of paint and the well trimmed plants sat lonely, casting an ominous shadow that spelled the current state of the nation he loved.

Hanari was going to go into America this time, for the first time in months, and he was going to take what was his. He was going to lay claim to their land, and he was going to trash it the way they trashed his. He was going to eat their food, drink their water, have sex with their women, drive their cars, stay in their hotels...........

The difference is, that when Hanari was finished there would be nothing left to scavenge. He was going to go into the United States, and more specifically the fantasy land called Lacklanland, and he was going to claim it as his own.

Same Beach, 10 Years Ago.

The moonlight was always so beautiful in the Dominican Republic. The way it made the water glisten, the way it lit up the landscape just enough to cast shadows but not quite enough to show detail. The moonlight was a criminals best friend. The moonlight was when the real hero's showed their colors.

The car sat idling, down by the water. The nightlife was bustling. People were everywhere. There was music coming from seemingly every corner, and the big hotel that sat facing the Atlantic was lit up like a Christmas tree. Nearly every room was filled.

Hanari sat in the drivers seat of the 2001 Buick, a cigar staining the flesh between his fingers and his dingy tee shirt being reduced to nothing more than a cotton ash-tray. In the passenger seat was a friend of his. A close childhood friend who had fallen on hard times. Hanari was always someone who you could talk to, he would always try to help people if he could.

But he always had a hatred in his heart for tourists.

The following dialogue is in Spanish, this is the translation:

"These people are living the dream out here" Hanari's friend Tomás almost groaned out. "They are enjoying themselves."

Ashing out into the coffee cup in the holder next to his seat, Hanari looked on at the pier, which was also lit up, as people walked up and down.

"These people come here with no respect. The come here and think that this is a free-for-all because they are in a country not as affluent as their own. Hell if we did half the shit they did, we would end up in jail and then sent back here before we even got a phone call."

Hanari had almost a growl in his voice.

"These people spend so much money here, but the people get none of it. Even the hotel is an American corporation who built as close to the water as they could to shelter these people from the REAL Dominican."

Hanari took another puff, his eyes narrowing as he saw a group of males in polo shirts and khaki shorts with those insufferable boat shoes making their way down the beach--beer cans in hand, singing some stupid song and dropping aluminum waste behind them as they went.

"These people have no idea what the REAL Dominican is like. But one of these days, they will see. You best believe, they will see."

Tomás's eyes lit up as he watched the twenty-somethings drop yet another empty can on the beach, the hollow aluminum bouncing around in the retreating tide.

"Why not today?"

His eyes, there was something about his eyes. Tomás was about to do something extremely stupid.

"Tomás, you need to think things through. Your family has been through enough already with your fathers death and your brother in the clink. Your mother doesn't need another negative phone call."

Tomás was not going to listen.

"You still got the yayo?" he said, his voice a more monotone now.

"Of course I've got the yayo, what does that have to do with anything?"

Tomás pointed to the men, who were now about 60 yards from their location--one of them pulled another beer out of his pocket and popped it open, dropping the old one behind him.

There was a snicker in his expression.

"Ayyyy chicos! Yah, you, American......you want to party?" he said in pretty decent English.

The three guys stopped their walk and looked towards the car. They were a decent ways away from the hotel now.

"Party, with you? I don't think so.....pablo" the three men laughed and high fived at the barb thrown toward Tomás by the apparent leader of the douche brigade.

Tomás was not impressed, but he kept his cool.

"Where are you guys headed to?"

The three men looked at each other, pretty surprised that he was able to speak English to them so well, you know, being a native and all.

"What are you, a taxi?"

"No, amigo, no taxi here. Just curious why three grown men are walking the beach damn near holding hands with each other without a choca in sight. What are ya'll, nancies?"

The men laughed, this time loosening up at the joking tone Tomás used, as if he was one of the "bro's". They walked towards the car.

"All I am saying is that I have some fresh, high quality yayo here. Figured if you are trying to find a quiet, dark spot to suck each other off at least you'd wanna be numb for it."

The men looked at him confused. It sounded like he was joking, but that was a pretty sharp worded insult.

"Actually, chico, we are headed to a party right now with a few girls we met on the beach earlier. They have a hotel down the block."

Tomás knew he had them. Hanari puffed his cigar, staying quiet and looking straight ahead.

"We you all would like to be hero's at the party, no? Bring some blow, loosen the ladies up, yah?"

The men all nodded, as Tomás took the bag out from under the seat.

The three men came closer to the car to inspect the product, the booze running through their veins and inhibiting their decision making process.

"What are you doing?" Hanari whispered.

"I am just taking what's mine" Tomás said under his breath as the men got to the door.

"Looks good, how much, ese."

Tomás looked at the man with a smile. Just then, he pulled a gun out of the same spot he pulled the bag from and stuck it in the mans face. "Get in".

Hanari sat by the water, looking out at the ravished beach which he knew simply as "Home." He was going to get back into the ring for the first time in months on July 13th, and that was a fact. Sarah Lacklan was cocky, arrogant, and so completely misinformed. Hanari pulled a cigar out of his shirt pocket, the same as he did a decade ago, and lit it. This one was for Tomás.

He was going to take what was his on Savage..........

And there wasn't a damn thing she could do about it.

"When Hanari firs' come to XWF mang, he had to face tha best. Cha? He had to go up agains' some da best this company has to offer, see? Hanari won da televisión title en his secon' match ever, sí, and was' on hes way to de top. He face chico's like Mastermin' en' señor Blackwater. Hanari come to XWF an prove his worth, cha? Now he come back after injury break, and has to face Doby the house elf from Harry Potter, sí. Jus' no gon' cut it.

When Hanari firs' arrive here, he had morals. He had principles, sí, and Hanari try to be the good guy. There es no bein' "good guy" en XWF. Cha can no' be a total polla, but chu has to be tough. Chu can no' care about who ya face, why, when.......back den' Hanari would be very upset abou' facing en mujer......Hell, Hanari was upset. Hanari have to face Jessalyn Hart an defen' hes title. He no wanted to do it, but en this business beggar can no be choosar. So Hanari make her tap........

What es so different about this match? Hanari know that dis mujer es a lil tougher than Jessalyn--though, Hanari has patent leather shoes tougher than Jessalyn--but that no mean Hanari can still be upset. No, no, no. Hanari has two options. Principles....morals.....everythin' screamin' at Hanari not to hurt her too badly......cha..........

............................or ripping her arm out of her socket and making her tap out!

Which one will Hanari choose? Chu alread' know tis the latter!

Perra......Hanari es goin' to make essample out of chu! Hanari has dreams, goals, thing that he wan' to do in this business. See, no' everyone' make it 'roun' here, and the fact that XWF give Hanari a chance, and then another, he has to make the best of it. This perra has "King of XWF" tag and es Federweight campeona......she has done a lot en XWF. Hanari no have the same track record, but this es a chance for Hanari to prove his worth, cha! What has chu done lately? Whiel Hanari sit en his 5 star hotel rooms watching XWF durin' hes recovery, he no see Sarah Lacklan. He no see "The King". Hanari see chu bow out and let a pájaro fight for chu. Oh, and chu beat Mastermin' on Anarchy. Bravo, señorita, as Hanari beat Mastermin' too. An' take hes title. The only thing' Hanari see about chu es ya comedy routine. Chu es a gimmick that try to be funny to mask any form of skill. Hanari es one of de best technical wrestlers in de world, and chu es........well.......chu es living in a fantasy land. Lacklanland.....da hell es dat? Chu has been claiming ya territory over on da B show....actually, make et da C show......an' have no been all too impressive. Hanari come into dis match as da new guy, again, but surely no the underdog. Chu bigges' win en recent memory was a tag match at de Pay Per View, and chu had help! Now, we all get to see what chu can do on ya own.

Hanari love de XWF. Hanari live, breath, bleed de XWF jus' like he live, breathe and bleed el dominicano! Chu turn XWF into a sitcom. Hanari no going to stan for it! Chu keep talkin' about dis "Trash Panda"....make big fuss about it. Hanari do not know what chu talkin' about, and honestly had to google it. Tis a raccoon. Chu no like a racoon? Chu make big stink about a raccoon, mang?! Regardless.....

Hanari es back. Hanari es driven, focus, motivated. Hanari smells blood en de water. Chu talk so tough despite ya size.....Hanari es ready to take ya head off. See chu need to be like me, chica. Chu need to be thankful, grateful for de opportunity chu es been given, and ready to give XWF all chu have. Chu has gotten complacent. Chu has been beating up on nobodys in de Federweight division en keeping a belt designed to keep j-o-b-b-e-r-s from cryin' about no being included, and chu ran with it. Chu took a small modicum of success and turned it into a gimmick. People could take chu seriously if chu took yaself seriously. Hanari es not sure why chu have become a big name around 'here.....perhaps it es the fact that chu look like a cartoon character en have a sharp tongue.

Hanari es goin' to cut it out.

Chu see, Sarah, King, Queen, whatever chor title es around this place, Hanari is going to take it. Strip it down to nothing, and throw it away. Hanari es sick of bein' the one who beat Mastermind an that es his only accomplishment.........now Hanari es going to tap out de quick witted puta whose only crime es being in de wrong place at de wrong time.

Hanari no need to come at chu with comedy, no need to make fun of the way chu look---even tho it es kind of goofy---Hanari just need to be real. Chu cannot, will not beat Hanari en his return match. It no big deal, chica, an Hanari will think no different of chu if ya tap out.....or if de Punta Cana kick knock chu unconcious. Tis' happens to de best, and base on what Hanari see, chu es far from de best.

The Dominican es been in de news lately for a lot of vacation tragedies, sí, but at de end of tha day it is still standing, still a destination spot and still de greatest place on de planet. Hanari es going to roll into South Dakota with a fire under his feet. Roll in with somethin' to prove, and roll in with one goal. To finally shut chu up.

Sábado 13 de julio, Hanari rolls into South Dakota with all the heat of the tropics behind him and finally can finally say he visited Lacklanland..........

................and burned it to de ground.

Viva el dominicano!

Viva el Savage!

Viva el Hanari Carnes!

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