[Well, bang goes the early retirement. Just when I thought I was in the clear, and hovering over the purchase button of a new yacht to sail my troubles away. This prized (former) IDIOT (International Division Impact Only Title) Chump decides he wants to get back in the game again (btw, you just lost the game).

Since no scene has been set, and no people are around other than me and you. Allow me to introduce myself. 

I'm the voice of the MR WS promo, I have no name other than "narrative voice". I shall be guiding you through the location, and activity of these here pieces of promotional material. Since dear of WS has decided to choose a "sport" where the written word is king. I'll also bring a great deal of attitude, and negativity. This isn't my preferential style of work. I really wanted to get into podcasting, or narrating children's bedtime stories for the accompanying CD which comes with them.  However the pay is good, and I'm all about that dollar even at the expense of job satisfaction.

Anyway I digress, I'm not paid by the word and therefore am keen to get this done for as little work. That way I can get back to spending the aforementioned dollars on illicit phone calls with those thousand upon thousand of lonely housewives.

So where are we? 

Well we are currently outside the XWF Towers, where (in case you hadn't guessed) a contract signing has apparently taken place. For reasons unbeknownst to most, though I presume for a minimum wage pay day, MR WS has rejoined the XWF Roster following a lengthy sabbatical. The door to these illustrious towers opens, and lo a MR WS doth emerge. Wearing a red plaid shirt and jeans, to fully conform with his "Back in Black" entrance theme, he wonders out of the building and looks around aimlessly for effect.]

Well it's about time! I've been standing behind that doorway for an age waiting for you to finish wittering away about everything.

[Oh, I almost forgot. Whilst playing a character of a narrative voice, I am of course a figment of MR WS' imagination. A creation within his mind, and thus he (though only he) can hear my every word. The extended introduction was not for any benefit of you, the reader/fan/fellow competitor, but merely for my own amusement to keep WS occupied at the reception of XWF Towers. So that the staff within the building thought him a strange and unusual human being just standing at a door, staring out the window at the outside world like an anxious recluse in fear of what lies behind this door.]

Yes ok, you can hush now. This is my promotional video you know, this is a massive occasion as the greatest ever International Division Impact Only Title Champion makes his grand and belated return to this company. There's a lot of people who won't know who I am, and I gather this from the fact I haven't a clue who they are. They won't realise the sheer magnitude of what is taking place, I need you to support me in hyping this. The prodigal son has come home, the multiple time failed entrant of the Lord of the Ring tournament is once again a paid up member of the XWF Locker Room.

[What a resume...]

POSITIVE!!

[Talking of prodigal sons, and Lords. The lord above is clearly doing me a favour, as Steve Sayors (who is clearly still here) appears with microphone in hand. I'll allow him to take it from here, I'm off to make a phone call.]

Steve Sayors here of XWF TV, standing alongside MR WS. WS it's great to see you, how have you been? And what's the latest?

Well Steve it's great to see you too, I've been doing just swell and I hope you've been doing the same. The latest in this very swift movement is that I have been accepted and signed to a deal to once again compete with XWF. I cannot tell you how excited I am to return to the ring, to face the new talents here and to see some familiar faces. When I left, I thought to myself that I was done. But you know what I'm like, this business... it makes me just spontaneously appear and disappear. I don't know what it is, one minute I'm arm dragging and driving pickup trucks... the next, I'm in a recycling bin for another 5 years.

Well it's great to see you, you're looking well. What's the ambition for this latest run in the business?

What is ambition? Hell some days my ambition is to just be alive tomorrow, you know? I come to XWF with the same ambition every time, to give it a good old go. I'm a former champion, I've held Gold. And I don't plan to come in and pussy foot around. The hunt is on, it doesn't matter which belt. Call me the Magpie, if it's shiny... I'm wearing it.

So that's a message to you all, even you James Raven. That Universal Title looks mighty nice, and I'm not discounting it as an item on my list of toys. But you know me Steve, I'm a grafter, I know that nothing is ever handed to you. I will pay my dues as I always do, I'll compete with whosoever the bosses want me to face. Or whosoever wants to lay down a challenge. Brother it's all good, whatever it takes to climb those Title ranks and get what's mine.

These are certainly some strong comments, some strong promises. I just wonder, is your challenge for a Universal Title match anything to do with James Raven drunkenly promising to lie down to an opponent in the midst of the resignation of Jim Caedus?

Steve... C'mon... Ey?... C'mon...

Well, once again Welcome Back. It's great to see you. I guess the only other thing to ask is if we can expect to see Bob Fairway managing you again

[... tell me again, about the feather duster...

Wait, what? 

Oh action again right. Erm.... don't worry about that duster.

So I guess Steve asked a bit of an awkward question because MR WS is staring daggers into Sayors Soul. Man, I thought I'd seen some looks in my time. ]

Don't mention his name in my presence again.

Ok... ok... I'm sorry. I was just wondering y'kno. If he was coming back and...

Just... don't... not even suggest it

[Steve Sayors steps back slowly out of shot. WS watches him go, as we...

...FADE...

...2...

...BLACK!!!]