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Gator · (04-02-2015)

*Gator sits in front of the camera on an armchair. He finishes off his cigarette and stamps it out in the ashtray in front of him exhaling the last of the smoke looking at the camera*

"So, the last weeks have kinda sucked."

"Basically everything from Madness Stampede to the end of Lethal Lottery for me has been a long string of annoyed fucks. Like, me saying fuck not having annoying sex, that doesn't make any sense. Fern didn't win the Hart Title, but Lane did, yo if you're watching this man well done. You were the second person I wanted to win the belt, hope you get a good reign with it man. Then me versus Doc for the Universal title, good match. Then I opened up a crate and won a prize! Fucking Sebastian Duke was hiding in a crate and caught me by surprise, cost me the match."

"Let me just put that in perspective for you guys, Sebastian Duke, a guy who is almost seven feet tall was hiding in a crate before the match started. He hid inside a fucking crate for what? Half an hour? An hour? Maybe longer. He was waiting in that fucking thing playing solitaire on his phone or some shit for a long ass time, in the last pod that opened. Then I'm like, 'oh shit, a fucking crate. I'ma pry that bitch open.' And what do I get? This dude's fucking meathooks around my neck costing me the damn match. Hahaha, pure Asylum tradition having outside help to win. I was wondering if Doc opened up that crate would he have gotten the same treatment I did? Or would Doc open up the crate and Duke pops out of that thing like a stripper from a cake and just exchange awkward glances with Doc. Whatever, in the past. I lost that match. Oh well. There's always next time."

"Then to Lethal Lottery. CorVus loses his match and gets fucking arrested, Sane loses his match and his X-Treme Championship. We all lick our wounds. So to sum things up, shitty week for Defiance. But, it was only a week. Only a setback. Now, we're moving on, looking forward. Looking forward at Iceman and Scully... PFft hahahahahahahahaha. HA!"

"You two are so fucked. Like seriously, so fucked. It's like a group of sailors have just made it to a small, cold, rocky island. These sailors have gone through storms, they haven't had sex in months, can't even jerk off because of their cramped living spaces, haven't eat much either. But they go through all this and find this piece of shit island, finally they can relax. They can eat some crabs, turtles and whatever else they can find. Then those sailors decide, fuck it, let's get drunk. And they do, they get blind drunk, and they party, but they're still frustrated from the journey. Then you two come in, two little

baby seals, all cute and new to the world, and you see these sailors. And these drunk, angry sailors see you. And they garb their clubs in a drunken rage, and beat the both of you to death. They just club those baby seals till they are nothing but a mess on the rocks. And those sailors feel a little better. Got all that stress out and those two baby seals are dead, and not one single person cares."

*Gator chuckles to himself for a moment*

T: "You're so disturbed."

*Gator looks behind the camera at Todd*

"What? No I'm not."

T: "Who makes jokes about killing baby seals?"

"I do. Fuck you, and fuck PETA. Anyway back to these idiots. Tell me the truth here Iceman and Scully, when you saw my name on the card next to Sane's, you shit bricks right? I bet you thought, Sane and CorVus, they're tough but we have a chance. Then my name was there and you said fuck. Hahaha, I've beat you both before pretty easily. Even Iceman when he was on his 'A game' couldn't touch me. But this week, this week I am begging you for a fucking challenge. No excuses. If you don't give one hundred percent I will be sure to fucking murder you."

"So let's talk about Scully for a little bit. This child got his so hard so many times, and was told he was a

so many times. He actually became a

. And not the Dim kinda mongoloid with the upper body strength of a Silverback Gorilla, no Scully became the type of

who picks up a participation award at the end of the Special Olympics. Now, I'm sure a few of you are asking the question Gator, surely you can't make fun of the mentally handicapped? And the answer is, sure I can. I've been doing it most of my wrestling career anyway. Fuck if he can still wrestle then I can do whatever I want. Might actually beat some sense into the fucking idiot. I've come across this poor pile of fecal matter a few times now and every time I've done better than him, now he was on the winning side at War Games, but I did better than him in a promo sense at the very least."

"But now I'm all angry and bitter and stuff. I'm a little older and a lot better. Scully can't beat me in a one on one and there is no chance he could beat me with a partner. If this was a handicap match, Team Tard wouldn't be able to beat me. Adding Sane into the equation makes this match a massacre instead of a battle. This fucker has been annoying me since day one. If there is one guy, one fucking guy, I could take pleasure in killing over and over again, it's Scully. This

and his shitty insults bring me so much joy. He just has one of those faces I want to punch, you know? And the funniest thing is I don't have to do anything but sit and wait, all I need to do is just watch this assholes promos and listen. And then I speak, and then I win. It's just that fucking easy."

"But, let's go to Iceman real quick. Haha. Iceman could never beat me. He's tried and failed. No matter anything he says or does he could never win. I hope he realises this. I can just curl my hand into a fist and stick the whole thing in his mouth. Maybe keep pushing down and rip out the fucker's large intestine and choke him to death with the fucking thing. Hahaha, dude couldn't beat me after Mastermind 'softened' me up, and I use that term lightly by the way. He couldn't beat me on my worst day, fuck this may just be my worst day and he still won't beat me. He won't beat Sane. He won't beat Defiance. Fucking loser couldn't beat his own dick even if there was a title hanging from it."

"Has he done anything? The only notable thing Iceman has done is one, win the X title from a sleeping Bobby Zi, and win a foot race back to the ring against Samuels and McBride. And people were like oh em gee! Dude's gonna go far, I was like this kid could go far... Thanks for making me out to be a fucking liar asshole. How you're still with this company confuses me honestly, you and Scully don't belong here. That's a nice sentence actually."

"You two do not belong here."

"Leave. Fuck off. Jump ship. Give up. Retire. Die. I don't care, just know this is the last time I want to look either of you in the eyes. You two fucking scumbags thinking you can actually play with the big boys, you two

thinking you actually stand a chance in the ring against me and Sane. No, not just me and Sane, against anyone who I have respect for. You shouldn't be in the ring against Fernando, Lane, Mastermind. Yeah you don't deserve to be in the same ring as Mastermind, maybe go down the fucking ladder and hang out with people like Knight, TJ or the new kids... You could do me a favour actually. Since I have all this pent up aggression toward Asylum, maybe you two could just join their ranks real quick. Give me a reason to actually care about you two. Just the both of you, try your best at least so you can walk out with your head held high in the fact that you tried. Or don't, give up now and walk away, I honestly don't care what happens to you two."

"Can't wait for your replies though. Maybe talk about how I lost to Doc and how Sane lost his belt, I'm sure we're not pissed off about that and already have a hundred comebacks waiting. Oh maybe say some dumb shit about my mask again, maybe a Lazarus reference, they always fucking work right? Right!? How about how I'm British? How I talk funny and don't like grapes? Anything is possible with you two fuckers! It's going to be a fun week... Just fucking dandy."

"Peace!"

*Gator gets up from his chair and walks away from the camera. Todd turns off the recording and walks out with Gator into the hall*

T: "Not bad."

"It was something for now."

T: "Got to say expected a little more from you man."

"How do you mean?"

*Gator walks down the stairs, Todd following from behind*

T: "Thought you'd be angrier honestly."

"Why? I'm not angry at those two, I'm barely angry anymore. Can't change the past Todd, need to move on."

T: "I guess. But I thought you'd use that anger on Scully and Maverick."

"Scully and who?"

T: "... Iceman."

"Oh, gotcha. Well, no. They don't deserve all that, they're idiots and they annoy me, but I don't want to scare them too much by being big angry Gator. I'll take it easy on them, make them feel like they're doing something, and when they're all comfortable that they're doing something. BAM! Go do my usual thing and kick their asses both verbally and physically."

*Gator and Todd walk into the living room. Gator jumps onto the couch beside Better Todd snoozing, he scratches the Bulldog's head who grunts and stretches on the couch. Gator takes a cigarette from the pack in his pocket and lights it up, relaxing on the couch, Todd walks around the couch and takes a seat on the armchair, grabbing the remote and turning on the TV*

T: "Sooo, what now?"

"What?"

T: "Defiance coming here? Drink some beers, play D&D maybe some Xbox."

"Nah."

T: "Oh, so are we going out? Meeting them at a bar?"

*Gator sighs deeply*

"No Todd."

T: "So, what? Just sit here and watch TV?"

"That's the plan."

T: "... Okay... Should I call Sane? Invite him over?"

"Fuck Todd! Can I not just have a fucking hour to myself? Jesus, you're a grown ass man. Go outside or some shit, get some exercise too."

T: "Funny."

"I know, I'm hysterical."

*The two sit in silence watching TV... Awkward*

T: "You need a hobby."

"I read."

T: "That's not a hobby."

"It's not? Huh. I drink."

T: "That's more of a problem."

"Not of you drink past it being a problem. I smoke too."

T: "Again not a hobby, that's an addiction."

"Whatever. Why do I need a hobby?"

T: "I dunno. Get your mind off things, keep you busy, stop you from getting bored."

"And what do you suggest?"

*Todd thinks as Gators sits up properly rubbing Better Todd's belly*

T: "How about making things, from wood and stuff?"

"You mean joinery?"

T: "Yeah. I guess."

"That's like a job man."

T: "It can be, but not if you do something fun with it. You could make like a go-kart, or a rocking horse."

"... Or something not lame."

T: "Yes, or that."

"I'll give it some thought, there is a shed in the garden that's pretty unused."

T: "Yeah! I say go for it man."

*Gator takes a long drag from his cigarette and exhales a cloud of smoke that lingers in the air*

"Fuck it. Order some wood Todd."

*Gator gets up and walks past the couch into the kitchen, Todd jolts up in confusion*

T: "Wait what!? Where do I get wood from?"

*Gator stops and turns back to Todd*

"Trees you idiot."

T: "No shit, I mean were can I get some?"

"Wood? Look at pornhub for a while."

T: "..."

"There's a park about ten minutes down the road, take a saw and go there. I'll be in my work shed."

*Gator walks through the kitchen and leaves through the back door in the kitchen, leaving Todd speechless. Todd sighs and rubs his forehead*

T: "The fuck have I done?"

F A D E 2 B L A C K

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