“GIVE ME BACK MY CAMERAMAN!”

*Gator stands shouting at an abandoned warehouse. No answer come from the building. Gator rubs his chest and looks around*

“STOP HIDING BEHIND THE IRON CURTAIN ASSHOLES! Ha, I should write that down.”

*Still no answer*

“Well, looks like I’m going in.”

*Gator walks to the steel door of the warehouse and tugs on the handle. It doesn’t move. He looks around and kicks in the door, forcing it open and walking inside*

They must know I’m here already with the racket I’m making. There’s only 4 of them anyway, not too much trouble.

*Gator quickly poke his head through every doorway to search for Todd and his captives, trying to move around refuse that impede his progress*

He has to be here somewhere. Then again I could have just been imagining Face’s voice. My head really hurts, so does my heart. If I don’t find my pills in time I’m at risk of dying in this godforsaken frozen wasteland. I need to move.

*Gator jogs through room to room and the footage transitions to Todd sat in the chair, still tied up. One of his captives kneels next to him playing with the machete*

T: “Well, why don’t you just call her?”

“I run the risk of looking desperate, I really like Sasha.”

T: “You know, my friend Gator is going through a similar thing with this girl called Scarlett, he really likes her too but he’s afraid she’ll leave him if he makes one little mistake.”

“Well, what your advice?”

T: “Just be yourself man, if you keep pretending to be someone else you’ll never know if she likes you for you or the man you’re pretending to be.”

*sniffle* “Tank you Todd. Gator is lucky to have you as a friend.”

T: “I know right! Thanks Kristov, just don’t think too much into this thing with Sasha, I mean going after a drug lord’s daughter could be a bad thing but you just need to follow your heart.”

*Kristov nods knowingly and reassuringly places a hand on Todd’s shoulder*

“SUCK MY DICK!”

“The hell was that!?”

T: “... Oh boy.”

*The footage once again transitions to Gator who is taking cover behind some barrels. An armed thug yells Russian while taking pot shots at Gator. Sparks fly of the barrel as they scrape the containers, the bullets barely passing over Gator*

“Fuck you too!”

*Gator throws bottles and bricks scattered around at the thug but just misses with every throw*

“Give me back my son! Get off my plane!”

*A click comes from the thug’s assault rifle; he starts to swear in Russian and smacks his gun. Gator takes advantage and hurls a brick as hard as he can, hitting the thug in the forehead and knocking him to the floor*

“Fuck yeah!”

*Gator fist pumps and walks cockily around the large room with his arms open*

“And Gator from the 50 yard line with one hell of a punt!”

*Gator sprints over to the grounded thug and almost knocks his head off his shoulders with a Punt Kick*

“It’s good! And the capacity crowd goes wild! Gator wins the handegg championship!”

*Gator hops over the fallen thug and tries to control his breathing to reduce his heart rate, he walks through an open doorway and starts to go up a set of rusted metal stairs. He begins to quietly sing*

“I don’t wanna wait for our lives to be over, I want to know what right now will be-“

*He stops halfway up the stairs when he hears mumbling. He crouches and sneaks up the stairs, putting his side against the wall and peeking around the corner. He sees two thugs arguing in the hall. Gator picks up a shard of glass and hides the arm of his coat; he takes a deep breath and walks out into the hall*

“Hola-“

*The two thugs aim their guns at Gator*

“-mi nombre es Caimán.”

*The thugs shout Russian at Gator and he puts his hands behind his head. One of the thugs goes behind Gator to constrict his arms but Gator throws an elbow back into the thug’s nose and twists around the thug to get behind him and placing the shard of glass against the Russian’s eye, Gator’s other arm tightly around the thug’s neck. The now hostage Russian drops his gun and starts to whimper as the other thug still aims at Gator, blurting Russian gibberish*

“Blah blah blah THREE! See! I can speak Russian too, now shut the fuck up and drop your gun!”

*Russian gibberish*

“Shut up Rick! I’m keeping the baby!”

*Russian shouting*

“Oh yeah!? Well fuck you too! Now drop the gun!”

*Russian grumbling. The thug places the gun on the ground and Gator moves himself and his new friend to the side, walking to the side of the thug and kicking away the gun*

“Very good. Now kiss!”

*Gator throws his hostage’s head forward and forces the two Russians to headbutt each other. They both fall to the ground; Gator throws the shard of glass away and dusts off his hands. He takes the guns and throws them out of a window beside him. He immediately regrets that decision and moves on*

“This is too much excitement for one day.”

*Gator walks down the hall examining the open doors that lead to abandoned machines, he walks past them until he gets to a closed door, he puts an ear to the door and kicks it off the hinges. He walks into the room where he sees the kidnapper with his machete up against Todd’s throat*

“You come closer, I kill your friend.”

“... Go for it. It’ll be super cool.”

T: “GATOR!”

“What? It will.”

“You would want to see your friend dead? Even after all the good advice he give?”

“Well, no. I like Todd- *Gator quickly points behind the kidnapper* OH my God it’s Vladmire Putin! And he has vodka and farm hookers!”

*The kidnapper looks at Gator with disappointment as Todd tries to look behind*

“You really think that would work?”

“Kinda, yeah.”

“You imbecile.”

“A little, but would an imbecile rig this place to explode? KA-BAM!”

*Gator pulls a detonator out of his coat pocket*

“You’re bluffing!”

“Am I? Only one way to find out Heavy.”

*A drop of sweat rolls down the kidnapper’s face as he stares at Gator.”

“...”

“...”

T: “...”

“Okay! Okay...”

*The kidnapper takes the machete away from Todd and back away with his arms in the air. Todd gets up and runs next to Gator*

“Get the bags.”

*Todd grabs the bags from the corner of the room and goes back to Gator who is backing out of the room*

“See you later alligator.”

*Both men leave the room and the footage goes to black. The footage comes back a few seconds later and we see Todd and Gator walking away from the warehouse; Gator swallows some of his pills and hands the bottle back to Todd who puts them back into one of the bags*

T: “Gator, thank you so much.”

“No problem man, any time.”

*Todd smiles at Gator as they continue to walk away*

T: “So, did you really wire that place to explode?”

“Oh yeah.”

T: “Holy shit! Really?”

“Yeah, see.”

*Gator and Todd turn back around to the warehouse and Gator presses his finger against the detonator trigger. Nothing*

“Huh. Where did I put that C4?”

*The footage transitions to a taxi stopped at a red light and the car explodes a few seconds later. Flames burst up into the sky with the wreckage of the car. It’s okay though, the taxi driver was actually a paedophile. We go back to Gator and Todd who shrug and walk away*

“Well, let’s go see how many fuckers I can kick the shit out of tonight. Win or lose, it’s going to be a ton of fucking fun.”