10-02-2013, 12:34 PM
Tri Bute: Our Future Lord, Our Great Future King: A Biographical Future Comic
ISSUE #4 (Part 5)
The Future Seal: Fla Bby
Previously on ISSUE #4:
“Maybe she should ‘act’ her way into a future paper bag!”
“Can I have this future surgery?”
“No,”
The future school district recommends that Tri Bute gets future finger addification future surgery as soon as possible.
“Can I get it now?”
“No,”
“I am walking J.I.Z.Z., Cam Puss,”
“If I see this J.I.Z.Z. then maybe I’ll put you on that future stage.”
S.P.U.N.K. and J.I.Z.Z. oozed out of Tri Bute and sprayed his future face.
“You’re in.”
“I’m out.”
“Here girl! Ow!”
The future sky is the minimum.
Watch out for that future tree.
BEEP!
BEEP!
“We are running out of future time!”
“Doc, if we don’t get this future arm on now he might future bleed out.”
“I’m going to need a few future rubber bands!”
The future pain began to eat away at him like Peter Glimmer at a primitive buffet.
This isn’t the J.I.Z.Z. I came here for; I know that much.
“Look what the future cat dragged in!”
“The other Tri Bute was a M.I.L.T., and he would never crash my future car.”
“Pick up this future glass, and pack up your future room. I’ll expect you out of here by next future week.”
“Feed the future seal, too! Good future night!”
---
Stupid future bat.
Tri Bute clutched his future jaw as he cleaned up the last of the future lamp pieces.
Stupid future lamp.
Tri Bute tossed the future trash into the future trashcan. He walked over to the future refrigerator and opened the future refrigerator’s future door. Tri Bute grabbed a future bucket of future fish and headed to the future backyard.
Stupid future screen future door.
The future seal’s future holding area was dark. It was future night. It was dark every future night. That’s pretty much the difference between a future night and a future day. The future day is when it’s bright outside and the future Sun is up. Sometimes, it is future cloudy during the future daytime, but, well, I’m not going to pretend to know what the future ratio for future cloudy future days to sunny future days is in Future Ryan, Future Oklahoma. It was dark. That’s what is being said in this future paragraph.
Stupid future night.
“Here girl.”
Fla Bby wobbled out of her future holding area. The future silhouette moved side to side at a bit of a rapid pace. This future seal was hungry. She hadn’t eaten since future lunch when Tri Bute fed her earlier.
“Here it is Flabs. Good future seal, good,” said Tri Bute while trying to remain as future monotone as he could.
Tri Bute tossed a future fish and Fla Bby caught it in her future mouth.
Stupid future fish.
Tri Bute never liked doing future chores, but he did them. It’s not too much of a hassle to serve the future household future pet a future meal. He got kicked out, so, he probably wouldn’t ever have to do this again.
Tri Bute pulled another future fish out of the future bucket, however, before tossing it Tri But took a future moment to rub his future jaw. It still kind of hurt from the beating he received.
Fla Bby wasn’t the most patient future seal. She was a biter. She was ready for that sweet future fishy taste. Her future eyes darkened like the future night. They grew future black and empty. It was almost as if she didn’t contain a future soul at all. The anticipation and future animal nature of the future beast claimed the future animal. The overzealous future animal struck with its future teeth ripping some of Butey’s beautiful future flesh away like future paper from a future college ruled future notebook.
The second future dose of the darkest future moment ran through Tri Bute’s head. The future pain is something that seems to get shoved in his future face a lot lately. He remembered that future laughter and that future pointing. He remembered the future tree that he hit and those future branches. He hated future branches. He didn’t future bleed, but it hurt.
Stupid future laughter. Stupid future pointing. Stupid future tree. Stupid future branches. Stupid future bat. Stupid future lamp. Stupid future screen future door. Stupid future fish.
“Hilary Swank,”
His future brain flung back and forth across his future skull. Tri Bute dropped the future bucket of future fish and spilled its future contents all over the future grass in his future backyard. The pounding future pain over took him as he threw himself to the future ground. He tried to crawl away, but you can’t escape your own future body, not even in the future.
“Can I get this future surgery?”
“No, that’s dumb.”
Rejection was a future concept all too familiar to him. It didn’t hurt him physically like crashing into a future tree did, but it sure hurt his future feelings.
That graining, ugly voice rammed through his future ears like a future cotton swab in the wrong future hands.
Modeling photos began to flash before his future eyes while a love song about the golden rule rang through his future head like a trampooning generivarticatular oonepoahterroristity hilaryswank of uglinproxemitermetercosity. It was a really zero swag thing.
“You shall not overtake me!” shouted Tri Bute as he rolled across his future backyard.
Tri Bute’s future body began to twitch and contort. It was almost as if it had a future mind of its own. A future force unbeknownst to Tri Bute knocked him off of the future soil into the future weapon rack.
“Where are you? Future monster make yourself known!” shouted Tri Bute again, but not as loudly since he didn’t want to wake up his future neighbors.
Tri Bute stumbled to his future feet, but once again he was thrust into his future weapon rack. Tri Bute grabbed a wooden rounded stick-like object and begun to swing it in all future directions. His future eyes shut themselves as the future weapon struck something flabby.
“Is this the source of your power, future monster? I’ve kept you deep inside me for too long, future beast, it’s time for me to break your future spell.”
Tri Bute took a future step backward onto something slimy and wet. His future foot slid backwards at a faster pace than he could control. Tri Bute fell once again. He could feel something surrounding him. The iron jawed women’s call made his future skin crawl once more.
With the wooden object still in future hand, Tri Bute swung again; it ricocheted off of something flabby and wrinkly. Tri Bute swung again. He heard future growls and future whimpers but he continued to strike. He had to fight it. He had to show the future pain who’s future boss. He had to apply future Medurma to the emotional future scars. He had to extinguish the future fires that roared up at the site of the future match’s strike. He had to hunt down the future animals that once terrorized him in the future forest. He had to future sue the future doctors that committed future malpractice. He had to melt down the undeserved Academy Awards. He had to blow his future load of justice, integrity, zankustility, and Zeusrion.
Tri Bute forced his future eyes open and continued to swing rapidly into future night. The repressed future memories of future pain slowly began to fade. The Swank Incident became a forgotten notion. The jealously that he felt for his future elders and future classmates soaked itself up and dried the future ground. It soon wetted once more with future chunks of the future monster. That golden rule song died out and a new anthem bellowed louder than any other.
The future club clanked and crunched the future seal’s future bones. The future meat became less flabby and more tenderized. Happy future thoughts began to return to Tri Bute’s future mind. The sounds of justice, integrity, zankustility, and Zeusrion shot out of the end of the future club. J.I.Z.Z. clogged up Tri Bute’s future ears like a trampooning stylilistastic superclashracrashindo darrencriss of beautifulcosity. It was a really swag thing.
With one final swing into the pile of future mush Tri Bute let out a future sigh of relief. He released his grasp on the future club and let it bounce on the future seal’s corpse with a thud. Tri Bute turned over his hands and looked into his future hands. He studied them harder than he ever had before.
“How thou future hands claim a future beast?
You were imperfect, disgusting the least.
Could it be six was a future thought this whole future time?
A future thought so absurd, discovered with future rhyme!
A crowning future achievement that future day dawned,
One of justice, integrity, zankustility, and Zeusrion!”
Tri Bute pondered and future thought while he looked at his five future fingered future hands. Future saliva soon dripped out of his future mouth. With the back of his future hand he wiped away the future fluid.
That’s when I realized I could do amazing things too. I didn’t need to alter myself like my future classmates. I didn’t need to have six future fingers. All I needed was a reason, a future motive, and I could do anything. That’s how I future danced so well. I was doing it for a reason. I was doing it for J.I.Z.Z.; Fla Bby was a future menace that had to be disposed of. She was just the first to fall to the J.I.Z.Z. covered, five future fingered future hands of “The Future Warrior”. I knew then that she wouldn’t be the last one to swallow its future wrath.
I cleaned up the mess I made and shoved the future seal’s future remains into a future trash future bag. I put the future bag in the future oven and cooked the future meat until it was no longer raw. It made a nice final future breakfast before I moved out. My great grandmother sent her future compliments to the future chef.
I left my boyhood future home later that future day with new sense of purpose. I didn’t know what the future had in future store for me, but I knew that whatever it was, I had more than enough future fingers to do it.
Tri Bute future taped down the last “Missing Future Seal” future poster on the future stop sign at the end of the future road. With his last future chore over and done with, Tri Bute gathered his future suitcases and future bags and left his future neighborhood. He didn’t know where the future journey he was embarking on was going to take him. All he knew was the future sky was the minimum.
"Pink is my signature color!" - Elle Woods
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