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Stevie Tyler · (08-07-2013)

F-I-G-H-T-I-N-G

It was mid-afternoon. Stevie stood, still in nothing but his boxers and Mr. Satellite t-shirt, in his living room with Nura, Drotte, and his new guardian angel, Rayha. She had been explaining why she was sent to Stevie in the first place. Apparently, there is an ancient order known as The Order of the Owl that is out to kill Stevie. You'd know that if you'd been reading. Especially stuff from the last Saturday show. They've failed 3 times now, and this last one was the most dangerous yet.

There's more danger to come, she said. Great. The Order of the Owl has been around for centuries, but as of today, they're very disorganized. This is something Rayha says will be in their advantage. The reason Stevie has grown such a huge target on his head is the same reason he's targeted on a daily basis in the XWF. He's winning matches. He's got gold. In short, his stature is rising. People notice Stevie now. And what they notice is a man fueled by demonic forces to achieve his goal.

The Order of the Owl sees the same thing Drotte warned Stevie of. They believe that Stevie will spark the apocalypse. That demonic entities will be drawn to him due to the taint (hehe) he has on himself because of Gary, and that the armies of The Host will, hunting The Damned, converge on Stevie as Ground Zero for the End-All. The Order doesn't want that to happen. Not yet, anyway, and they will do anything to kill Stevie before it does.

Rayha says, as did Gary, that it's nothing to worry about. She says The Host has no plans on moving in on Stevie, because Gary and those he draws isn't important enough to draw them out. Gary just said it because he wanted Stevie to focus on wrestling.

Everyone seemed to be getting along, even if there was obvious tension between Rayha and Drotte the Liar. Stevie was even handing out sodas. Nura had had 5. A portal opened in the corner next to Stevie's Clerks poster. Gary stepped through, in his full demonic glory. He actually seemed hesitant. Nervous, even.

Gary avoided eye contact with Rayha. She glared at him, menacingly. "H-Hi...It's been a while," he said.

"Yes. It has. Not long enough, Baal'Nezz," Rayha replied.

"Now, I mean, there's no need for that. We're friends. It's Gary for you."

"We are enemies. You betrayed us."

"Baby, you know it was an accident! Drotte, tell her it was an accident!" Drotte looks down and away. "What a dick you turned out to be, Drotte!"

"There are no accidents in the battle of Light and Dark," stated Rayha, matter-of-factly.

"That doesn't sound like you. You know there can be! Is this all because I betrayed The Host or because you think I betrayed you?" Gary glared at the angel.

"You...you told me you were sick at home. We had no sickness or pain."

"Baby, I was out with the boys. I was playing cards!"

Drotte mumbles, "And I'm supposed to be the liar."

"That's funny, I don't remember myself or that tramp, Urie, being called 'cards'! UGH! YOU MAKE ME SICK, GARY!" With that, Rayha vanishes in a brilliant flash of white light that leaves everyone blinded for a few moments.

Gary grins. "You guys hear that? She called big-poppa 'Gary'! I'm in! She can't resist this, bro! She can't. Resist. This."

The television, which was turned off, mind you, comes to life with a brief bit of static. The static is followed by a simple, black background with a symbol of an owl holding a sword. A robotic voice belts from the speakers.

"We are The Order of the Owl. Steven Nicholas Tyler, please turn yourself in. For the good of humanity. For the good of yourself. We do not wish to harm you, Steven Nicholas Tyler. We only wish to make you better. We are The Order of the Owl. Steven Nicholas Tyler, please turn..."

It repeats 3 more times as they try to turn it off. Unplugging was the only way to stop it, which is better than Gary's suggestion that he eats it.

What the hell was that? They want Stevie to turn himself in? They didn't give him an address. Leave it to a secret society to be cryptic. While he was trying to reason things out, the other guys had FINALLY caught on that Gary and Rayha had dated. Gary's telling stories.

"So yeah, she tells me...Stevie, bro, to really understand this, you gotta' realize that we experience time mostly at once. I mean, not completely, but we see a lot. It's not really linear. So, she's a cuddler. She throws one arm over my shoulder, because I like to be the little spoon. Then, she tosses her leg over my hips. She says, 'Holy shit, it's like mounting a horse.'"

"Yeeeeeeaaaaaaahhhhh," said Nura, gyrating.

"That's what I thought too, bro. I even said that! She says, 'No. I said 'horse' not 'My Little Pony.'" Everyone laughs. "BRO! How are you gonna' insult a guy's dick when NOBODY has dicks!? We're celestial bodies, bro! Then, I'm not even sure if she MEANS it would be small or that it's marketed for little girls but mainly enjoyed by creepy men in their 30's. Whatever. Just, whatever. She hates me."

"No she doesn't," reassured Drotte, who, again it should be reinforced is named 'Drotte the Liar'.

"Should I turn myself in to them, you guys?"

"Yes," said Drotte.

"No," said absolutely everyone else.

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