[Far removed from his family reunion, he was in his hotel room watching TV. As he flickers through different channels, his phone blows up and he see’s it’s Cousin Tammy calling him, which he picks up the phone to speak as he sat up on the bed.]
T: Yeah Tammy, what you want?
Tammy: You haven’t been picking up my calls since that little incident you had at our family reunion, is everything alright?
T: Yeah, yeah… just been thinkin about the shit I did to cousin Larry, I kinda feel bad enough to say I’m sorry to him, but he didn’t need to out me like that.
Tammy: Look, it was a mistake on his part, I know about how you are private about your kinda quirks and shit. But, you didn’t need to beat him up in front of the family, now they are thinking there’s something going on between you and his girlfriend.
T: Well, let them talk, because I’m about to head out of Texas within a few days from now to take care of some business.
Tammy: Well I know you are busy and all, but I was thinking that me, you and Larry and Victoria, with your sister go out to a party boat that my friend invited me too. You need to be out of that hotel room!
T: Fine, fine… what time is the party boat thing?
[Then he searches in his bag for some presentable outfits, as she tells him it’s going to start at 4pm, as he was finding his outfit, he hears a knock on his door. Then he opens it to see Victoria, then he tells Tammy he’ll see her later as he hangs up the phone. She walks into his room, and observes the place, as Tommy looked worried.]
T: Uhm… how did you find my hotel?
Victoria: Samantha told me, so I just managed to catch a bus to come and find it. In fact, she said I should say hello to you.
T: Um, okay then uhhh… i don’t know what to say, but aren’t you supposed to be in school or something at this hours?
[She sits on the bed, as she licks her lollipop as she shook her head no. Tommy then hands her a bottle of water he bought out the store, which she accepts. She motions to have him sit to her, which he does as he takes a sip of water.]
Victoria: Let me tell you something about myself, I am a run away who dropped out of high school at an early age. So, I’ve been wondering in the streets until I found your cousin Larry at a shopping mall. From there, he wasn’t the same tricks who pray on young girls like me, he had told me he’d take care of me and everything like that.
T: So… does that mean, he cares for you? Better question, why did you have to show up here knowin full well I got into an altercation with him at that reunion over you?
Victoria: I just wanted to see if you are willing to start a fight, and you sure did do that!
[Tommy gets off the bed, and he opens the door and motions her to leave. But she refused to leave his bed, by laying on it, then he closes the door and tries to lift her up the bed, but she kept on refusing to budge. So he just left her there, as he looked at the clock and realized it was close to 4pm. Then he just leaves her on the bed as he got himself ready to head out to the party boat.]
Victoria: Hey Tommy, why are you getting dressed?
T: Well as you can see, I am going to meet up with the family at a party boat shortly, where they invited you as well. So, if you want to lay on my bed like a brat then fine by me. Or, if you try to get yourself together we can go together.
[Then he was finishing up himself and headed out the door, as she followed as well behind him. Then a couple of hours later, there was music, booze, food and debauchery of all kind that Tommy was in. After Tommy was done dancing on the dancefloor, he headed back to his chair where he was drinking some wine in a red solo cup. Then across from him he see’s Victoria and Cosuin Larry cuddling, as she looked at him as he beamed his eyes back to his cup. As the boat moves he heads outside to the seating area to look at the waters, then he see’s Tammy coming up to him with lady who looked like Kristen Schaal in her red dress, and heels on.]
Tammy: Oh hey Tommy, this is one of my co worker friends, Youranda. We go way back, and she wanted me to introduce herself to you, so have some fun!
[Then Tammy goes back to dancing as they both awkwardly look at one another, then they do some handshakes and sit across from one another.]
Tommy: So, you are Youranda… what a unique name you got there.
Youranda: Yerr yeah, my parents gave me that name. They wanted to call me Amanda, but they deicded to named me Youranda, my dad wanted to call me Yori while my mother wanted to call me Amanda, so they ended up just calling me Youranda… yeah.
T: Oh true true, man you look nice tonight… sorry if I’m just awkward towards you, I’m just shy dude.
Youranda: Oh don’t worry about that, you aren’t alone. Where your cousin works at with me, she’s the life of the party… me not so much. In fact, I am kind of introverted to a point where it’s just draining to keep up with people!
T: Tell me about it, Youranda… in my line of work, as a wrestler I got to deal with massive amount of fans and backstage shit. I tend to just keep a few close friends, I mean I’m open to everyone… but on the flip side, I tend to see myself wanted to limit contact. But anyways, how you liking this party so far?
Youranda: I like it sort of, I don’t mind it… you?
T: I’m having a ball out here, I be doing this type of stuff with my two buddies who also wrestle as well.
Youranda: Oh nice, so you like to wrestle in front of millions of people daily? How’s the road experience like for a guy like you?
[Before he could speak, he sees Victoria coming up to their table to interrupt them. As she tried to ask Tommy to dance with her, he said no which got her upset at him as she stormed off. He shrugged it off, as he focused his attention on Youranda.]
T: Oh, my bad on her, she’s with my cousin Larry. Before you ask, yep she’s like 16 or 17 hanging out with him, I don’t know what’s her program with him.
Youranda: Oh I know that feeling, I was like her trying to get with older guys but it never felt right for me at the end when I was her age. So from that point, I just remained single for the rest of my days, but don’t get me wrong I’ve done some ONS before.
T: Oh I see, well if you are ever in town, we can try to do something before I got to leave to head to Hawaii for a show. Also, maybe I can get you some tickets for the future shows I’m in.
[Then she nods her head, and she and T exchange another’s phone number. Then it was reaching to midnight as the party boat docked back to the area where it started, after everyone gets off the boat, Tommy and Youranda hugged as they parted ways as it fades off.]
-Insert Tagline Here About A Mark Custodian-
Looks like I’m back in town, and I’m ready to move away from jailbait, I might have a shot with her I hope before I leave the town to head to Hawaii. Maybe, I might take her somewhere nice and hope that Larry’s chick don’t try anything stupid on me, no matter how fine looks and her tellin me she a runaway just even adds more dafaq to the equation of how my cousin Larry get’s down. But, I just keep my distance from him, and focus on my own shit. I hope that when I come back to the town, me and her will pop things off to a better light, maybe get that southern hospitality that’s been long gone since me and my family moved to the East side since I was in my youth, oh man I miss those summer nights in Texas.
I can sit here and reminisce all day and night, but I can’t do that since I got to talk about other important things. Like knowing that Peter is basically the king of a all custodians in the world? I mean just being in his presence alone just makes me so jealous that everyone bows to him. To be frank, if I was a custodian I would so look up to peter with all the endearment, love, and adulation that would make Turk question his friendships around him, yes I’m making shitty Scrubs puns so sue me. I mean every time he speaks, he speaks with so much passion, so much higher status then the next janitor who’s barely paid enough to clean toilets in some offices in corporate America.
If I wanted to be a custodian or a janitor, I would so totally want to be under his mentorship, and all that bullshit… but unfortunately, I don’t think I’m cut out to be in that position at all. Hell I couldn’t even get a membership of his oh so elite club “The Exiles”, my guess is that I am no league of his own status a king of custodians across the world in the ring and out. I mean I thought you got respect of everyone in your little circle, and now you complaining about working to get respect?
What a punk ass question to ask, Peter!
Yes, you done the impossible, won matches that mattered, been a top guy in some other company like if it means a thing. I know I suck against a man like you, but so what you are so focused on thinking this shit is serious, well I can’t blame you for being such a huge mark for yourself, that you think I am offended that my previous encounters all sucked in your eyes. I don’t really even think I need to break a sweat with you, since all you will do is just have your internal monologues of how the yesterdays looked like for you, hell you think that you can handle me? Well I guess I am shocked enough for you to tell it to the world, I mean how does it look if a the Uni champion gets dethroned by a non-custodial man like myself?
It wouldn’t be great, and that’s for damn sure!
How about this for a fact, I know you just managed to tell the world that you are going to beat me! You know how much that’s a huge pop for the boys in the back! I mean just imagine you beating me down, and you getting your hand raised! While you go to the back with your Universal Strap, I’ll be the one in the ring, all old and broken, and plotting to sneak in your little custodial gig and take the hugest dump all over the place so one your men will have to clean it up, then suddenly shit starts poppin off. I kid, I kid… I wouldn’t do all that, but what would you do it it happens?
That’s for you and your crew to figure out…. Now back to the great topic of this match.
Peter, you can study my shitty tapes, you can double knot your boots or shoes, call me insufficient in the winning department and overall have the same typical views of a mark who think he’s more important just because he dethrone a bipolar cowboy who once held that same title you have in your waist till this day. You might be hot shit, but to me you are nothin more then a pretentious man who has this self diluted grandiose fantasy you are better then an average joe who holds a mop and cleans places for a living. Maybe, I can help you snap out your fantasy and show you how the real world can be like, when you can stop staring to the window tryin to think about what next rip off you can think of next.
Peter, it’s time to smell the coffee, and know when it’s time to take down the ego a bit, if I have to knock it down like a game of Jenga, then so be it! You can dismiss me, shit on me, or even think you have a chance on fighting me on some real country shit! But at the end of the day, I’m not the one who needs to tell the world that I was a “undefeated” world champion with four wins under their notches. So basically, keep smoking that hopium of you winning this match and you’ll get a clue by the time that bell rings.
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