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Jenny Myst · (01-19-2021)

I battle with depression, but the question still remains
Is this post-traumatic stressing or am I suppressing rage?
And my doctor tries to tell me that I'm going through a phase
Yeah, it's not a fucking phase, I just wanna feel okay

Jenny and Sarina sat in their hotel room Naples. It was the luxury suit, top floor, with an absolutely pristine view of the Gulf of Naples and the Tyrrhenian Sea. This old school city was beautiful in its own quaint way, much like Jenny and Sarina were.

Two bottles of Château Pape Clément Red Wine sat on the marble sink top, each bottle totaling close to $250 a piece, American currency. One of the bottles was half way empty.

Jenny and Scarlett sat in the big lounge chairs on the balcony, overlooking the city. Jenny takes a sip of her wine and crosses her legs, her mini skirt barely covering her undergarments'. Scarlett is in a tight leather outfit. These two looked like they were about to go out clubbing, not like Jenny had a high stakes match coming in in two nights against the most dangerous faction XWF has ever seen.....or so they claim.

"You know.....this Alias dude gives me the creeps. He is talented in that ring, but are you sure you can trust him?"

Jenny laughs a little to herself, taking a sip of the high priced wine.

"I really can't trust anyone, Sarina. Anyone but you. I know I have made a bed here, a bed of nails, and I have to sleep in that. But Alias hates the Left Hand just as much as I do. I think he will be focused on business Wednesday Night."

Sarina this time takes a sip.

"How about your B.O.B family, do you trust them?"

Jenny looks out over the city again, admiring the lights.

"I think the better question is, can they trust me? Their motives are still in question...they just do things to do them, shock value, ya know? But I have to thank them......"

"For?"

"For showing me that I can have fun again in this business. That I can smile again, that there IS light at the end of the tunnel for me. I had been kept down for so long, being a lap dog for Chris Chaos. Whatever Chris wanted, however he wanted it. Most of what I did here I did it because he wanted me to. They didn't hate me because of me, they hated me because of what he made me. Now, I get to make my own rules, I get to dictate my own life. They reached out to me when I was at my lowest point--I had just been dumped by the only man I ever 'loved' on national television for that creature Mandii Rider--and they recruited me. They saw something in me. I will forever be grateful to them for that."

Sarina takes a sip, looking at her best friend sitting next to her.

"I remember when you first started at the club, you were this innocent little thing. Didn't say two words to anyone. I thought for sure you wouldn't last a week."

She moves her glass to her other hand, and continues.

"But you did, Jen. You overcame your stage fright. You overcame your issues. You overcame me being the bully. I was the top girl at that club, the top earner, the head cheese. You stood there and looked me right in my eyes and told me to fuck myself. From that day forward, you had earned my respect. And that's not easy to do."

Sarina takes another sip. There was street music playing in the distance and little orange lights out in the bay. She wondered for a second what it would feel like to live on a boat.

"....but you have never made things easy, have you, Jen? You have never played nice with others. I mean....look what you did to Rebel. She has your biggest fan, Jen. I am pretty sure she may have even had a crush on you. You lured her in, dropped her with a DDT. Now, the crazy bitch is claiming you drugged her.........."

Jenny cut Sarina off before she could finish.

"I did."

Sarina cocks her head, "you what?!"

"I did. I slipped a substance into her water bottle. Same thing with Shawn Wylde."

Sarina set her glass down and turned towards her best friend.

"Why?!"

Jenny took a bit sip of her wine, almost finishing the glass, then swirled it for a second or two before finishing it off.

"Because for the first time in my life, I am doing what I want to do. For the first time in my life I am doing what I need to do to get ahead in this life. Rebel and I are still friends, trust me. She knows it was just business....."

Sarina snorts a little shaking her head.

"You're a monster."

Jenny laughs, looking at the empty glass.

"If we're gonna get into this, I'm gonna need some more wine."

Sarina agrees, and gets up, walking inside the luxury hotel suit. Jenny pulled out her phone and scrolled through the XWF99.com website, her twitter feed, and the match hype blogs and forums. This match was buried deep in the card and was still getting more attention than any other match on the card. Everything she did got attention. The Shooting Star Title match at High Stakes stole the show, and they were predicting the one at Snow Job to do the same. Everything was Jenny this and Myst that.......

Her lip curled into a sick grin.

She absolutely adored being popular.

Sarina comes back out onto the porch, closing the screen behind her but leaving the glass slider open. Jenny, without even looking up from the Myst hype train on her phone screen, puts her glass up in the air. Sarina obliges and fills it almost to the rim.

Jenny brings it down, and clicks her phone screen off. She watches Sarina fill her glass, finishing off the grossly expensive bottle.

Uncrossing then re-crossing her legs in the other direction, Jenny takes a sip.

"You know...I haven't always been this way........."

Believe it or not, I was a quiet, shy kid. I had just started a new school after I moved in with my foster family, and this was my third school in three years. This one was gonna be especially hard for me, though, because of where it was.

I was living under a bridge in West Las Vegas when Darren Sambuca found me. The only reason he found me at all was because I offered to wash his windows for a few bucks. Had I not done that I'd likely still be there, or be dead........or both. I was not shy then, but at school?

Anyways.....

Henderson, Nevada was a different animal. Fancy cars, two story houses, designer clothes and shops that weren't boarded up. The streets didn't have trash on them, the lawns were manicured and not overgrown, and the fences were white and painted not chain link and off-brown. I remember thinking I died under that bridge and this must be heaven, because it is certainly no world I was accustomed to.

They sent me to private school. Like, uniforms and everything. High socks, skirts, hair had to be a certain way. It was a catholic school, but I didn't even know who, or what, or even if God was. To me, God was not being cold at night, weighing more than 85 pounds (I was 87 when they adopted me), and having a place to sleep that wouldn't give you neck pain. Now, I am sitting in this classroom and they are telling me about this all knowing, and all loving being.......that we are his children, we are made in his image.

He must have a pretty shit fucking image. I remember thinking he must look like Rocky Dennis if we're made "in his image".

I remember this one girl on my class. She was a little older than me, her name was Tanya. Beautiful in every aspect. Hair, nails, eyes, legs, teeth.....perfection. I mean from the way she walked the halls to the way she crossed her legs in class, she was flawless. Of course, all the guys wanted her.

It was clear to me from day one that she was the epitome of popular. All the girls did whatever she said, and all the guys basically drooled over it. The teachers loved her, and the parents at the school told their children they had to be more like her.

I wanted to badly to be popular, to be just like her. I used to watch her in class. I watched how she carried herself, her confidence. I didn't have that kind of confidence.

It all started when I forgot a pen for class. It was my first interaction with "popular". I was freaking out a little. I was so afraid of getting in trouble, of looking stupid. I just wanted to make a good impression. Tanya sat next to me, and with a shaky voice I asked her if she had an extra pen.

She turned her head and looked at me. The head cheerleader looked almost THROUGH me.

"Umm....who are you?"

She asked. I had been sitting next to her for weeks, and she didn't even know who I was.

I didn't know what to say. It was like I swallowed a large melon and it was sitting in my throat.

"I......I'm Jennif----"

"Ugh....new girls." She said.

The teacher, who was watching the interaction, asked what the problem was.

"She doesn't have a pen" Tanya said with a wicked smile.

Everyone turned and looked at me. I felt my face flush red.

"I was gonna give her one....if thats okay...."

The teacher nodded, and shot me a look like its my fault the class got interrupted.

She made herself look like the hero, at my expense, over something so small. Everyone loved her, they thought she was such a nice girl. I had to sit in the remainder of class, shaking, because everyone thought I was an idiot. I didn't even take notes.

It pays to be popular.

The bell rang and I slammed the pen on her desk, walking by without even looking at her.

I had hoped that my first real interaction with popular was over. But hope is a bad word when you go to High School in Henderson, Nevada.

The next day, Tanya was excited because she had applied the lead role in the upcoming school play. As if we thought it would be anything different. Nobody even signed up for it, they knew it was hers. I had always wanted to be popular but I was never any good at sports, and being the new girl in a clique-like atmosphere, I really didn't have a shot at it organically. I was destined to just be a number, to blend in, to exist but never really matter.

I decided, on a whim, to put my name in for the lead role. Auditions were at the end of the week, after school. Well, when Tanya caught wind of this, all hell broke loose.

She called me inky, from the pen incident, and from that moment forward, she made my life hell.

She would knock my books down "by accident", often bumping into me in the hall way and acting like she tripped. Subtle things like switching my backpack when I wasn't looking so when I reached for a notebook it wasn't there, causing a distraction and getting in trouble. She even went as far as to penny me in the bathroom so I was late to class and got written up.

All because I challenged her ego and applied for a spot she thought was hers just because of her status.

When the audition day came, she was bragging about helping some local Catholic charity and donating a bunch of her families money. Her mom apparently signed off on this. It was this day I found out how much of a monster she truly was.

I didn't have any money, and my family wasn't in a position to keep paying tuition and donate to this charity. It was really taxing on them to keep me in a good school, but they claimed that they wanted to change my life and get me an education. What happened while I was home, however, well---we've covered that.

She called me out, in front of everyone. She told me that I was a fraud, that we were broke, that I was only at the school because I was my own charity case. That we weren't good Catholics. Everyone thought I was a terrible person after this because she fabricated an email, claiming it was from me, telling the principle that I would not be participating in the charity donation because God wasn't real.

HE BELIEVED HER.

I was told I could not audition for the part, that I was not welcomed in the school play (which had a biblical theme) and that they didn't even want me in attendence. I was crushed. As I was leaving school that day, heading to the bus instead of to the auditorium, she stepped up behind me.

"Where is your god, now?" she asked. When I turned around, she was gone.

I went home and cried. I was a pariah at school. I was hated by everyone, and that is how she wanted it. Anyone who threatened her authority, she did this to. She had driven many girls out of school, driven a few to suicide.

Though she would never take credit for that.

She was a monster, a popular monster.

I was a target, but if there was some solace in it, I was a mild case.

I could have left the school, or lived my life as the unpopular nobody who everyone hated, or I could do something about it.

In my heart of hearts, I wanted to be Tanya. I wanted the popularity, the perks that came with it, I wanted to be liked. That was all. I wanted someone to look at me as a human being.

From that point forward, I took a stand.

I sabatoged the school play. I drugged Tanya, so she forgot her lines. I slipped a little ditty in her drink.......she was mumbling about, drooling. You should have seen the principles face! I took her paper bag she threw out after eating her lunch, and I put pills inside it. I snuck it into her locker as she was berating another girl for how big her glasses were, and then told the principle she had drugs on her. She was suspended for a week and her parents got into an altercation at the school and had to be removed. None of this went unanswered, though. She had suspicions it was me. I pushed her to the brink. I made her snap. You see, I did JUST enough to provoke a response, but to the naked eye, it looked like she was going well over the top. I remember when I took her shoes in gym class and put them outside, and she poured milk over my head in the lunch room, in front of everyone. To the average person, she did it for no reason. People were beginning to speak up. Every time she would retailate to one of my small pranks, I would pretend to cry. I would act like it was a devastating blow. People were starting to defend me. I even skipped school and went to the mall for a few days, wrote a note with a forged signature that I was taking a few mental health days.

I purposely didn't shower, or wear makeup. When I came back to school I looked terrible. I went from sitting by myself every day to having a full table of people sitting with me.....mostly because they felt bad....and leaving her table mostly empty. The popularity was shifting. I acted nice, too nice, like I was everyone's friend and didn't have a mean bone in my body. My days were consumed with thinking about how I could prank Tanya again, get her to torture me more. It turned me on, I won't lie.

One day......she took it too far. We were at a party and she had the guy she had wrapped around her finger sexually assault me. He did it because she promised to go on a date with him, and to be his date to prom. He beat me up pretty good as I struggled.

It all came rushing back. I had become a monster, but I had created one two fold.

It was a few weeks later......the pranks had stopped. She had won. I was coming home from a party one night and saw a car flipped over on the side of the road. It was leaking gasoline. I pulled over, and ran over to the vehicle. Getting down onto the asphault, I looked under the car. Hanging upside down was Tanya. She made eye contact with me and begged me to help her. Pleaded. She told me she didn't want to die.

I asked her how this happened. She told me she was coming home from church and she couldn't stop. It was then I remembered.......two weeks prior.......after the sexual assault she ordered on me, I had stumbled out of the party, rummaged through the garage, and found bolt cutters. Her car had went to the shop for something, and I had a boy who liked me that worked there. I blew him in the office of the repair shop.....I wasn't proud of it, but he cut her break lines.

She was used to getting rides everywhere. She almost never drove herself. She even had that car towed back to the house so she didn't have to be seen leaving the dingy shop.

My eyes went wide.

She was leaving church and her brakes went......

I bent down, and my eyes narrowed. I still felt the effects, physically and mentally, of the assault.

"Where is your god now?" I asked her.

She seemed taken aback.

I smiled at her the same way she did the first day she ratted me out for not having a pen. Her eyes went wider than I thought possible. She knew I wasn't going to help her.

"You're a monster!" She yelled, sobbing.

".....but at least I'm popular."

I walked away as the car caught fire. The last sound I heard as I closed the car door was her screaming.

I cried at her funeral. I told everyone how great of a girl she was, how she didn't deserve this.

"You're a monster" Sarina said as Jenny swirled her drink.

Jenny looked at her and smiled........topping off her glass.

I wake up every morning with my head up in a daze
I'm not sure if I should say this, fuck, I'll say it anyway
Everybody tries to tell me that I'm going through a phase
I don't know if it's a phase, I just wanna feel okay

"So...like...when is all of this Left Hand shit gonna end? Seriously. They were cool for like 5 seconds, now it's just annoying. I know, I know, I can hear it already. "But Jenny...the Left Hand has your belt! Geri beat you last Warfare! They have your number..." yadda yadda. Keep on sippin' that Kool Aid, maybe one day it'll taste better. Geri, for the record, didn't make me tap. I didn't give her that glory. Sure, I passed out in the Camel Clutch, and by rulebook definition that's a submission W for ol' Wednesday Addams over there, but let's be clear on something RIGHT effin now.

The Left Hand is NOTHING. Sure, they took my belt after spending a month trying to burn me alive. Sure, they have my belt after constantly interfering in my business, damn near stalking me and being an overall thorn in my damn side. I was the Shooting Star Champion for 101 days and spent the better part of that reign kicking the crap out of the Left Hand from one part of the globe to the other. Has everyone forgotten they burned the BELT too? You see, they don't WANT this belt. Baphomet and his band of

goons thinks that titles are below them, and his Charles Manson like grip on their mind has them thinking there is some sort of bigger picture. They didn't want that belt, Geri doesn't WANT that belt.....they just don't want me to have it.

That is how I know I've been successful. This division has grown out underneath me. I have been the clear antagonist and target number one since Labor Day. I got the belt the recognition on the homepage, I got the buzz back in women's wrestling. The Left Hand? They've been running around with no real direction, trying to take over entire shows with their corny video montages and too-long-to-be-interesting in ring segments that they basically copied word for word from Creepypasta and then acted (shittily, I may add) out. Even managed to get Geri a title match when the original plan after I kicked Atara to the curb was to lay low until Snow Job.

But it's all cool man. It's gravy. I get to come out for the first time since it was still technically "summer" as the challenger. I get to come out and show the world that last Warfare was a fluke, and that Geri Vayden isn't corrupt at all, she's just lucky. Let's talk about Alias and Myst, lets talk about the Left Hand, lets talk about how the entire landscape of the XWF is about to change and about how the natural blonde from Vegas is going to show the entire world what heart truly is.

Let's save the best for last, and talk about how it benefitted Geri first. She now knows how it feels to actually accomplish something for once, and I bet she is feeling real good about herself. Probably even went out and bought herself a diamond pentagram necklace to celebrate. Jokes aside, Geri now knows how it feels to have that bullseye square on her forehead. Her big, ugly, square forehead. Her uncreative ass now has tainted the women's division forever and at Snow Job in Green Bay, you best believe I am gonna get MY belt back. But that is for later, and trust me I have PLENTY to say about Wednesday Addams and Becky the Bitch for my match on Pay Per View......for Warfare I need to wrap my head around the match I was volunteered for. The two bench players of the Left Hand, the meat shields thrown into battle, the two wannabe's walking into a gunfight with a knife. Alias, I'll be honest, I've done my best to avoid until now. We don't travel in the same circles, there would be no reason for us to ever be in the same sentence. The only thing we have in common is our beef with Horny the Goat and his band of nobodies that he throws in our faces and tells us we have to respect. He volunteered me for this match because, as he said himself, he knows what I am capable of. He knows that when I step into that ring, I get it done. That Jenny Myst.....

*does an Ian Malcom impression*

Uh.....finds a way......

Time and time again I have thwarted their plans. In fact, Lycana and Marf....they have been a non factor. This has been an Ash Quinn issue. SHE is the one with the blow torch, SHE is the one who tried to burn me alive, who tried to make me as ugly on the outside as she is on the inside......and the outside.

Sure Lycana and Marf did Atara Themis dirty, and she may never be the same again. But I think I have made it abundantly clear that I am NOT Atara Themis. I stand alone atop the women's division while Lycana and Marf continue to sit somewhere below the water line in theirs. It is baffling to me that Lycana is even on the same card as me. Thanks, Alias. Lycana, didn't the people at Sephora tell you NOT to apply like you're spackling dry wall? You literally could be a Dr. Seuss character. You look like Pixar's "Inside Out" representation of herpes. You think you're good, and that's adorable. Your entire crew is like Harry Potter and the University of Phoenix. The Left Hand has been exposed. It is the haystack that's had too many needles in it. We're onto it now, the jig is up. Left Hand was cool for about two weeks but not we all roll our eyes at your collective corniness. You two seem to be hanging onto that thread, though. You seem to be clinging to any hope that this entire "lifestyle change" you've embarked on was anything more than completely useless. That is all Baphmet is, Lycana, that gym manager who tries to sell you a diet supplement and claiming its not a diet, its a lifestyle. You buy in, wanting it sooo badly to work, but it was nothing but hot air because the "diet" he is asking for is impossible, and when you come back 3 months later just as fat as ever and he says it is your fault, that you weren't disciplined enough, that you didn't do it the right way. The TRUTH is that it was never going to work in the first place, but you aren't supposed to know that. You're suppose to just walk in, strap on your helmet, Velcro up your shoes, and salute.

"OFFICER DOOFY, REPORTING FOR SERVICE."

Obedient clones, that is what he wants. No originality, no personality, no individuality. All little mini Baphomet's who suck jussssst that much less than him that he doesn't consider them a threat. God forbid they were intelligent enough for a mutiny. You come running when he calls, even if you're running into danger. Your zodiac sign is wet dog, and the more you shake off the drops and come in the house the more bolt locks he adds. Weird flex, right? He is trapping you in a life of mediocrity so that he can achieve his goal of having the biggest team, the most "followers", and the impression that he has the biggest dick. He has the cuffs on, and you're allowing the bondage. Maybe you like pain? I have to ask, what have you actually done besides beat up Atara and win a lower card match or two? Geri has been in the spotlight, mostly because of me and Ash Quinn has been the center piece.....well.....again....because of me. You, Lycana, you're just there. You exist, but barely. If it weren't for the blue hair, you'd blend into a white room. Marf, If it weren't for the scruffy beard, you'd be an everyday dude. Neither of you two are special, neither of you command attention, but both of you have the audacity to demand it. THAT is why you fail. THAT is why the Left Hand fails and that is why at Warfare, Jenny Myst is going to rub your failure in your faces again. I told Geri, don't hunt what you can't kill. I have been the single biggest thorn in Goat Boy's side and now with Alias in my corner, I can push those thorns deeper. I can push them in until they sever an artery and you bleed out. You'd probably like that, though. There is no excuse, Lycana, for looking like the triangle player for an LGBTQ metal band, and you certainly have no business being in the ring. You can put sprinkles on shit, but that doesn't make it ice cream. A shit sundae, maybe, but that's me being generous. You're gonna sit in the back and watch me recapture my title, just like everyone else on this roster, and when you cut your wrist post show you'll carve MYST into it, just like everyone else. You look like you have entire outfits based around if your medication is working today. I know, I know, you don't care what anyone thinks. You and Louis C.K's down syndrome older brother over there. You're just so strong mentally! Why can't we all be like you?! Because not everyone settles for being pathetic. You aren't strong, you're weaker than Liam Roberts with the same fucked up emo complex and daddy issue's deeper than he used to thrust. Stop fooling yourselves. It's all you can do, because you stopped fooling us a long time ago.

I am going to come into this match and do what I do best, steal the show. I am going to come into Snow Job red hot, sizzling, and when Wednesday Addams gets a look at THIS Jenny Myst, she'll shit her pants like Barney Green on a Sunday afternoon. Goddamn Golden Corral $16 all you can eat weekend specials. Poor Barn. Thank god she wears all black now, could be embarrassing. He doesn't seem to mind, however.

I have been pulled into this match and you can blame Alias for that. He knows that I am the Left Hand's kryptonite, that I have all the answers to all the questions. The big pressing question that looms over all of us....

Does the Left Hand suck monkey dick?

Well the answer to that is an enthusiastic and overly emphatic......YES.

Alias wants to "Eat The Left Hand".....I simply want to break them down to their very core and then take that core and smash it into atoms. Blow away the dust. I am sick and tired of the games, of the attitude that they feel they can come into MY company and run roughshod. To be successful here, female or not, you're gonna have to go through Jenny Myst one way or another. Geri got one up on me, sure, I'll give her that. After 101 days of pure domination, I made a mistake. I am only human, after all. Some people say it is more fun to chase a title than to defend it......I say those people don't know how being a champion truly feels. Geri, I hope you are watching very closely tomorrow night. Sleep with that title, keep it warm for me, because after Alias and I run through your minions, my diamond eyes are going to be set 110 percent on you. I told you before, don't hunt what you can't kill. Geri, Marf, Lycana, Totes McGOATS, your entire B squad cast of "Where The Wild Things Are", that goes for all of you.

Don't hunt what you can't kill. You can't kill Jenny Myst.......as scary as you all claim to be, you've never seen a monster like me."

Yeah, here we go again, motherfucker, oh
We're sick and tired of wondering
Praying to a god that you don't believe
We're searching for the truth in the lost and found
So the question I ask is
Oh, where the fuck is your god now?

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