Chapter 1
The Sith were right...



"This?! This here?!"

The horse-masked man screeches into his Youtube livestream, his voice cracking from an emotional apex,

"This is how they do it, folks! This is how they kill your children. THIS! This... this..."

Probing his brain for the proper gobble of reactionary trigger-words, the horse-masked man twists his gloved hand towards the greenscreen behind him. To the viewers on Youtube, the screen is projecting an image of Gina Carano acting in her role as Cara Dune from Disney's "The Mandalorian", a popular Star Wars spin-off series.

"This is reverse pansexual Trans-Mania! This is Feminist-Marxist Jewery! They're rotting your daughters' minds. They're saying: 'YES! Little Sally, look at what the women of the twenty-first FUCKING century look like! Arnold Schwarzenegger!' And do you know what they're saying to your sons? To little Johnny? It's: 'boys, THIS is what's attractive!' Women who could easily pass as a some brain-rot, transgender lunatic.

Go on now, fetishize over the sweat beads glistening on her ripped triceps, or her jawline that's as square as her bounce less tits!

Folks. The evidence is clear. They want your son to be attracted to male, emo, ANTIFA bodybuilders. They want your daughter forsaking any semblance of her genuine female qualities and romanticizing the ideals of rebellion as she suits up to become a Soros ANTIFA foot soldier. This is how they eradicate western culture. This is how they exterminate our holy bloodline."

His stallion sueda-skull sinks into his hands for a moment. There's a paralyzingly melodramatic pause dressed up as something tantalizing; and from all around the flat-earth, dozens, literally dozens of human-kind's most forthright imbeciles brace on a choking gasp. They're breathless without his words, The Holy Roman War Horse, the only conservative Youtuber to finally transcend the normal limitations of their beloved IDW's half-baked opinions and imaginary persecution.

Things weren't always this way for Edwin Moffett, though. A frail-framed, relatively geeky, sci-fi loving upper middle-class child turned overt homophobic fascist? One ever-so bent on rallying like-minded "normies" towards a cause of destruction that would protect the irrationalities of their insecurities? Perhaps it was some well-lit autumn of a premature senescence, or moreover, the discovery of the darker corners of the wide web where this gaunt, dark-haired, video game loving adolescent finally encountered a means towards expressing every well-to-do grievance life had forced itself upon his ill expressed understanding of liberty.

"GOD IS DEAD!"

He proclaimed with a thundering roar behind his mask, standing upright from his desk with a hopelessly dramatic rigor and veracity, reciting Nietzsche as if he had even the slightest clue what he was actually conveying.

"That's right they've killed our heavens. This neo-Enlightenment era that we, the proud and chosen few, fought so hard once to crush has swelled up from the sewers to castrate our semblances of the normal world. I SAY ENOUGH! And will you say it with me? ENOUGH! ENOUGH!..."

Edwin chants this again and again into his expensive, screened in-box recording microphone, knowing far too well that at least one other "oppressed", white cis-male was chanting along with him... He slowly holds out his hand, curiously cuffed by the edge of his tightly pressed red suite jacket, and refocuses his neuroticisms,000

"By now the many of you should know all about my future endeavors. With the crimson stain of my life's source (A really shitty attempt at saying he signed a contract with blood), I have inked my name across an XWF contract. The XWF, the belly of the beast. A place where adulterers', wig-wearing trans gts, the demon leftists are censoring my free-speech right now! Fatsos, meth-heads, baby-rapers, jews, spics, nig*ers, non-Macedonian Europeans like Slavs are met with a nauseating fanfare or acceptance and even gold for dispatching one another in front of a world-wide audience of demon leftists. And on Wednesday night, you're Holy Roman War Horse will go into the lion's den, dispatching their gentiles and saying once and for all...

KATHLEEN KENNEDY! YOU RUINED GEORGE LUCAS! GEORGE LUCAS?! YOU RUINED GEORGE LUCAS! PALPATINE WAS RIGHT! THE JEDI ARE FLAWED!"

-to be continued?- probably not. this was painful.