-The Payne & Joy podcast #3 is posted online-


Payne: Welcome everybody, to the Payne and Joy podcast number 3. I am Hunter Payne and this is the one and only, Joy Giovanni.


Joy: Hey!


Payne: So Joy you want to pick a topic of discussion today?


Joy: Yeah. can we talk about one of the rookies in your match. As you fans know Payne and Joy aren't shy in engaging in a war of words.


Payne: Oh, I think I know where this is going. What's her name again?


Joy: Jessie Diaz. And this Seattle slew has some issues.


Payne: Want to vent?


Joy: Yes! Ok this ugly thing! So if your thing is being a whiny emo bitch with personality issues, then your doing it right. Congrats your the first rookie in this match to get our attention, and that's not a good thing. The only reason guys hit on you, is because I'm not there. When compared to me, your a just another... guy. You think being a guy-hating whiny emo bitch is original? That's almost half the XWF roster. But, you mentioned backing out of the match. Please do! Save yourself the embarrassment and humiliation. Please don't give up your fear of flying. Try again, this time off of a cliff!


Payne: I like how she spends more time in her head. Then actually saying words to form sentences. With you Jessie everything you do is a note to self! I can imagine you being like JD from that show Scrubs, just daydreaming and meanwhile everybody is looking at you like 'does she mean to say something out loud. Because she's said one sentence since we've been here!' What I am trying to tell you is GET OUT OF YOUR OWN HEAD. I also found it interesting that she's from Seattle. And they have a high suicide rate...


Joy: Yes, take the hint bitch.


Payne: And her obvious favorite band, and what their lead singer did to himself to end it all.


Joy: Again. Take the hint bitch.


Payne: But I wonder if It's like a chicken and the egg thing. Do people kill themselves in Seattle and therefore she should as well? or is it because she lives there that people in Seattle are killing themselves?


Joy: I got one too! Is it that nobody cares about her, and that made her a complaining emotional bitch? Or that she's just being complaining emotional bitch, nobody cares about her?


Payne: Oh hey she also had a message for me! This should be fun. This is a direct quote from the Seattle Slew, "Hi Hunter! I saw the podcast you put up and I think you might've broken a record there! The longest time in which someone can speak without making a single point!"


Joy: Said the person who just wasted 5 minutes of our life saying she's a crazy bitch that likes to talk to herself and can't wrestle. Yeah, that was a lot more entertaining Jessie.


Payne: There's more... "I mean come on, subjecting us to your annoying fucking girlfriend while you two play twenty fucking questions on camera? I think you're breaking the Geneva Convention's laws on cruel and unusual forms of punishment. Even going so far as to, as you so eloquently put it 'skip the rookies because who cares about them?' Because it's so smart to not focus on your opponents, y'know, the ones who are going to grind your ass to dust faster than it takes your girl to fake an orgasm? Yeah, let's focus on everything else under the fucking sun, because that's the perfect course of action!"


Joy: Annoying fucking girlfriend. Funny. Last I checked complaining about men hitting on you, your apartment, and roommate. Was the most annoying and pointless thing I've seen so far in the XWF.


Payne: And 20 questions was a very entertaining segment. Unlike your fucking life story in your last promo.


Joy: I think that was just one day in that emo bitch's life.


Payne: Fuck! there's going to be more of that stupid shit we saw today?!


Joy: And I think that rookie comment hurt her a lot. Because by saying that simple liner Hunter, you made her face the reality that really nobody cares about her.


Payne: And for the record, it is very smart to not mention the rookies in Monday's match. Because it shows you losers aren't on my fucking radar of competition. Madness is going to be a massacre. Paul Heyman should change the name for one night to Monday Night Massacre. You just fucking mentioned you can't wrestle. And you feel that you and those other 3 who's names I've yet to bother to remember. Will beat a team full of people that know what they are doing? Then your crazier than I first thought!


Joy: Hahaha. If there's one thing this Psychotic Seattle whore knows how to do is fake an orgasm! But wrestling is a lot harder than laying on your back and letting a guy pin you for money.


Payne: And, yes It's our podcast and we will talk about anything we fucking want. Under the sun, or the sun itself! The sun: Something Shithole Seattle never gets to see. But we get it all the time in California.


Joy: Yes. Even the sun is a more interesting topic than this ugly cunt. Let's talk about something else.


Payne: Wait, Not yet, can you believe she wrote more?! "How about we talk about what's going to happen in that ring, you know, the place where it matters. Let's talk about how I'm going to pick you apart, limb from limb, while you struggle to get out of the gates. Like how I'm going to snap your ankles as if they were twigs, tear your ligaments like they were pieces of paper, beat the fucking taste out of your mouth. How I'm going to make you into a glorified punching bag."


Joy: OMG! that's sooo... what word did she use? "Intense!" Why don't you change your tampon and fucking leave the XWF, with your inability to be "intense" in the slightest way!


Payne: Lets get one thing straight Miss Diaz, The only thing I'm terrified about getting in the ring with you, Is if I kick your ass so badly, that you bleed and get some of your HIV infected blood on me!


Joy:Well said. Please tell me that it?


Payne: Nope. "Alas, there isn't enough time to do all that at once. So I'm just to have to pick one thing to go after. I did already make a pretty good case about your arms, so I may just stick with that. However, maybe a few kicks to the head will make you interesting to listen to. Either way, it would be embarrassing to lose in pretty convincing fashion to the team of rookies that you didn't think anything of, am I right?" Uhhh. No your wrong! If the other rookies are anything like you, It will be a gigantic waste of my fucking time. I still can't believe we are spending this much time on our podcast talking about you. But we have to clarify the crap that comes out of your mouth!


Joy: But wait, You also mentioned you can't wrestle. So why the fuck are you here? This place is for Pro Wrestlers and their managers. Not whores like yourself wasting everybody's time! Including ours! What a waste of a podcast! Ugh, to waste it on a STD infected Seattle Whore.


Payne: I'm just going to read her final comment about us. "And because that was the worst catchphrase ever. Of all time. I decided to take it upon myself to think of something much more suitable. Oh wait, that actually is suitable for the worst podcast ever. Of all time. Fuck, at least you did something right."


Joy: This bitch doesn't know when to shut her mouth. Why bitch?! Please tell me why in the hell would we take catchphrase advice from somebody who doesn't have any?!! But I got one for you. "Jessie Diaz: Fuck me at your own risk" And that way you can give guys a chance to not get whatever nasty shit you have!


Payne: Ugh, I think that's all the time we have for today's podcast. But we have thank Jessie Diaz for doing to us; what she has done to so many men in the past... Leave a bad taste in our mouths. This is Hunter Payne and she is the lovely Joy Giovanni saying....


Joy: Don't go to Seattle fans! Jessie Diaz lives there. Ewww!


Payne: Well that, but I meant that other thing. You know that thing Jessie Diaz doesn't like to use...


Joy: Condoms? Protection?? I don't know what that slut doesn't like to use!


Payne: A Catchphrase Joy...


Joy: Ohhh! Payne and Joy out! ;)


-Podcast ends-