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Jenny Myst · **08-04-2017, 06:26 PM**

Chris and Jenny sat at a table at The Three Broomsticks restaurant at 100 Universal City Plaza, Universal City, CA. It was located within the "The Wiazarding World of Harry Potter", a section of Universal Studios. Chris had a water, with lemon, in front of him. Jenny was sipping on what appeared to be Iced Tea.

Chris was sitting stone faced, looking at the wall. Jenny was scrolling through her phone, giggling as her little fingers picked up the pace of her scrolling.

They had already ordered their food. The place was jammed. The place buzzed, mostly with kids and their uncaring and seemingly annoyed parents, and Chris and Jenny seemed rather out of place.

But that was how they liked it.

"You know, the internet is a hilarious place."

"You're just figuring this out?"

"Well.....no......I just was checking out reddit quick and there are actually a lot of meme's that pertain to our match tomorrow night."

"The XWF has meme's now?"

"No silly.....metaphorically, of course."

Chris nodded. A small smile had crossed his face, barely noticeable unless you were really studying his jaw movements. He had taught her well. But no matter what he taught her about relating everyday things to opponents, he only wished he could be as viscous as she was.

Fucking brutal.

"They literally have everything. Like look.....they have one for Blue....or whatever the fuck her name is....."

Oh god. He could only imagine what she was about to pull up.

With a giggle, she turned the phone towards him.

"That is about the type of woman that Robbie Bourbon attracts. A woman after his own heart, I'll tell ya."

She giggled, bringing the phone back to her face, illuminating her makeup.

She waiter came back over, followed by another one in tow that was carrying a set up tray. Their food was on it.

"Okay....we have the Rotisserie Smoked Chicken Salad for the madam...." he sets the large salad down in front of her. "Dressing on the side, of course." He smiled at her. She smiled at him.

"And for sir, we have the Shepherd's Pie with Garden Salad." He sets this meal down in front of Chris.

"Enjoy, and I will bring you a refill on the drinks."

"Mmmmm.....looks tasty" she said, as she dug her fork into the salad and scooped it to her mouth. Chris put his spoon into his sheppards pie. Jenny still had her phone out, and when she was done chewing she began laughing again.

"For real though, they have it all. Like look here......for Jack Cain......"

Tilting the phone towards him, he looked at it while chewing.

"This is so fitting. Not only is he ugly as sin--truly a face only a mother can love--but he has had a stretch of bad luck recently, hasn't he?"

She takes another bite of her salad, this one has chicken in it.

"He came here like a wrecking ball. He was big, bad, and seemingly unstoppable. He was groomed to be the next big monster, one who could take on Caedus. Then what happened? He got yoked up by Brock Lesnar, he lost to Neville---repeatedly, mind you---while losing his TV title in the process. Throw a no contest vs. Neville in there. Since then, he has lost to Doc, Thaddeus Duke, Neville AGAIN, James Raven......I mean shit, Jack Cain has become the Cleveland Browns of the XWF as of late."

"Nice analogy"

"Thanks......but for real. He has proven time and time again that he can't get the job done against the top talent in this industry. Doc, Duke, Raven, all men you've beaten. Neville, someone you would beat......"

"He beat you...."

"Shush. You get my point."

"I do."

"He simply can't beat Neville.....kinda like you with Jim Caed---"

"Don't"

"Sorry.....but yeah.....Bad Luck Brian works for him. Call it booking, whatever you need. I call it sucking royally. Get it?"

"Boom."

"Thanks."

Taking another bite, they both do, she scrolls down again. Giggling with food in her mouth, she clicks on something before turning the phone towards Chris.

"Oooooh, ooh, look at this one."

"Robbie does an awful lot of talking, doesn't he? Aren't offensive linemen usually the quiet ones on the team? He claims that fat jokes are lame, and maybe they are, but aren't blonde jokes? Aren't slut jokes? I mean, shit.....it clearly gets under his skin. So what am I going to do? You're damn right, I am going to continue to drive the point home. He claims you stole a pinfall in the chamber, but he did all the work. Well, since when has being opportunistic been a crime? Just because being that big and that high in the air aren't good bedfellows, doesn't mean you did anything wrong. You didn't do anything he wouldn't do. He cheats his ass off in the ring.....his crash was clearly a result of pilot error......."

"Bazing"

"......and I will address him more later. But We haven't talked at all about Scully or Parsh. What is our game plan?"

"You're asking about a game plan for a team called

? Hell all we need to do make loud noises and run around and they will be too distracted to focus on the match."

The waiter comes back with the drink refills. Chris and Jenny are close to finished with their meals.

"Scully has ducked you before, when he was Universal Champion.....a belt he hoarded for some time and finally lost.....to Gilmour of all people.....what makes anyone think he stands a snowballs chance in hell now? He comes out all emotional, giving us a video feed of a ruined life from drunk driving and domestic turbulence......are we supposed to feel sorry for him? Are we supposed to have sympathy? No.....he has had it easy since summer time and I am going to be the one to take his handicapped pass away. Watch him fend for himself. Watch him tread water. Guppy Parsh doesn't have the skills to do it on is own, and Scully's indecisive ass will probably re-retire mid match."

She scoops another bite of salad into her mouth, looking around annoyed at the loud children running around with gift shop plastic wands.

"Oh my god....hahahaha.....look at this....."

She tilts the phone towards her bae.

"This is his one shot to be relevant. Nobody on the roster likes him. I guess, you only do

once.......once is all it takes. Yuck."

"That one is funny......you're good at this."

"I'm good at a lot of things."

"Save that for later."

She licks her lips and winks at him.

"And the last one here......Guppy Parsh. The Dark Knight. Mr. Batman."

"Loser."

"Totally."

She scrolls through her phone, looking for one to apply to their masked foe. "What should I do......hmmm."

Chris leans in, using his best Heath Ledger impression.....

"It's simple......kill the batman....."

She giggles again, flipping her hair out of her face.

"Okay, so you have one more for me or are we done with the internet sensations for the evening?"

Taking a final bite of her salad, she smiled a wicked grin.

"Oh, I've got one more."

Their server was right there to take her plate. She was impressed with the service, especially at a kids place.

"I think I found one more serious in nature for our little vigilante in training. Look at this."

She tilts the phone again just as he finishes his plate.

"Hahahaha......that's a good one."

"I agree. This jagoff is in Hollywood, thats where he needs to be. Only, he needs to be in some producers basement, not a wrestling ring. How long until this Batman gimmick gets old? Maybe when the next superhero movie comes out."

"There have been several movies since Batman...."

"Hey! You can't kill a kids dream! Meanie! He wants to be Batman. For godsakes they can let boys wear skirts and identify as any noun in existence and girls shave their heads and say they are oppressed.....let him fight subway crime and stop the oppression of fictional insurance commercial characters!"

She turns the screen off and looks into the crowd of kids and annoyed parents.

"I just thought of something........all of the Kings are winners of the King of the Ring tournament in the past......."

"You put that together all by yourself?"

"I did."

"Proud of you."

"Me too."

"You're too much"

"You love it."

"I do."

"Lets go kick some ass tomorrow night."

The server takes his plate.

"I don't know why Robbie thinks we are married? I don't know what tipped him off to that. But I'll tell you what. IF we win this tournament........I'll----"

She leaned in, eye's wide.

"You'll what?!"

"Well.....you'll just have to see."

"You know I hate surprises."

He wiped his mouth with the napkin. "I have to bleed the lizard.....sorry Guppy...I'll be back."

Jenny smiled, looking down at her hand and wondering how a ring would look.

She blushed.

The Diva Of The Damned

"Slut joke after slut joke. STD's, blonde cracks. Dirty vagina jokes. All of that packed in to one promo, and the hardest hitting of all of them? Marriage fraud. Pathetic. And what is even more pathetic is that Wobbles McGee over there gets his sphincter all tight over a couple of fat jokes. Fat jokes are tired and played out? Yeah, but eeevery opponent I have faced since I started wrestling hasn't hinted at promiscuity with a touch of grime? Chris was right, Robbie, you're just the fat kid with a quirky personality who gets by being corny because....well......who doesn't like the truffle shuffle?

Robbie Bourbon as a child:

Just because you have been picked on and belittled your entire life, it is not right to assume that every girl out of your league is some cum guzzling gutter slut. Because, if that were the case, every female on planet earth would be..........

I think you know the name. Rhymes with you.

But at least you didn't say you were going to rape me. Scully has a lot of nerve. But would it be rape? If a

rapes you, can you convict them? They don't know any better. What if I were to rip his dick off and choke Guppy with it? That is, if it is big enough to do so with. Can I get convicted, Bobbitt style? Surely he doesn't know any better, but I do. What a terrible double standard that is! Such a cruel reality those people live in. But you want to rape me, Scully? I want to see you try. I truly do. At least Can't Run D.M.C had somewhat creative ways of saying he was going to. You just come right out with it. Fine. Well let me come right out with this. I think you suck. I don't need a creative metaphor for that one. I think you flat out suck. I don't like you, don't respect and sure as shit don't fear you. Plus, your little crime fighting buddy there---will he really allow you to attempt one of the most serious crimes in our judicial system? You should really think before you speak. It isn't becoming of you.

And Parsh, where ya been bud? I've barely heard from ya. You'd think you would have a lot to say......quite the opposite. Whats the matter? Bat got your tongue?

And Cain.....you are correct, you did nearly break my back. But you didn't break my spirit. I am still standing. But can you look deep inside yourself? Do you honestly think your shaky alliance will last? That laardvark you call your partner has bigger goals. He doesn't care about the Kings, he cares about the King of the Ring, and McDonalds. He cares about winning this match--but when you fuck it up again he will cast you off like a cancerous tumor. You are big and strong, but you don't have the skill. You've been knocked around like an abused wife as of late.....you are rattled, you are shaken. That is why you needed this alliance to begin with. Strength in numbers. You can't hack it one on one....so you teamed with anyone who would give you a chance. Well you made the wrong choice. You and Hamthrax over there have no chance. Just pretend this is a TV Title match......

Haha.

Loser.

These tag belts are ours, plain and simple. Chris and I are the only ones fit to face the Kings. Chris is the only one in this match with the formula to beat Doc.....and he has never dealt with me before. We are the perfect recipe.

We are.....perfection.

She gets up to leave the table........but does a quick turnaround.

Oh, I've got one more for you before I leave.........

Robbie......you cheeky bastard........

Hahahahah.....fuck you!

Pure Perfection

PERFECTION

9-4-0

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