The XWF's Most Famous Homeless Person Said:"Well Chris, you did it. You less metaphorically and more outright blew yourself up as a dick head lobe lovin' lady, even more so than you did before High Stakes II with all that cum swallowin' talk. I "fist fucked (your) shithole all the way to (my) elbow"? Christ, Chaos, that's some hardcore homo talk; the fuck you doin' wrestlin' when you could be rakin' in the dough on webcam helpin' dudes jizz? And what lesson did you learn from our Triple Threat Iron Man Match? Didja walk away with the knowledge Thaddeus Duke is better than you? Didja limp off humbly accepting o' the fact that Caedus crushed you? Course not...unlike me, clearly still possessin' o' the power and skill I've had from the beginning, you refuse to believe your time is over with, your era extinct.

"Does anyone else understand this garbage? The run on sentences, the redneck slang, the words that sound like they are being haphazardly slung out of a mouth rotting from years of chewing tobacco. I mean, Jim, maybe you're exes are right. You are truly crazy. You ramble on like madman and don't make any goddamn sense. Well, that isn't acceptable for me. I want the world to hear loud and clear Jim Caedus say "I QUIT! I FUCKING QUIT! Whatever position I have to arrange your jaw into to get that clearly I will. Forget tapping out, Jim, I want to make you say it. I want to hold a microphone to your mouth and make you submit me to in front of the world. You want to tap me out....great......but Jim that just simply isn't going to happen. You know it and I know it. I'll be KO'd before I submit. It just isn't in my nature.

But Jim, you touched on a lot of points. If you read my promo, I never said Peter's match was for the title. I was using a metaphor, something I wouldn't expect you to understand. Yes, I am going to make fun of your personality, your appearance, the way you talk. Because you sound like a fucking . Of course I am going to tell the world that my era isn't over because it frankly isn't. Why would I give up now? I, too, am human Jim, and I stumble also. I make mistakes. We all do. It is how we come back from those mistakes that make us. I already took out Graves, hit you with your own belt, and damn near won a match against two of the top competitors in the history of this business until you stuck your ugly nose into it and fucked the whole thing up. You aren't making mistakes, Jim. You are making Space Shuttle Challenger sized fuck ups. I am just here for the fall out.......

To watch you crash and burn.

I never had an issue with you before, Jim. But you made it personal. My quest for the title around your waist was a business venture, and you turned it into something so much more. You brought this upon yourself. I am proud of you, though, for reckognizing that you are a human being and you make mistakes----but then you refer to yourself later on in the promo as the Star Killer? So which is it? A human being capable of making mistakes.....capable of being defeated.....or some unstoppable weapon from Star Wars?

---Speaking of Star Wars, I couldn't finish my promo without mentioning this. So let's take a quick detour shall we? The "Star Killer" was big, it was bad, and to the naked eye it sure looked imposing. It looked impossible to defeat, Jim, which is I am sure why you were drawn to it. It reminded you of you. But what you were too stupid, or too blind, to understand is that the "Star Killer" base had one little flaw.....and when that one little flaw was exposed it could be blown to pieces faster a skeet shooting plate a redneck Bar-B-Q. It took a lot to expose this weakness, and even more to exploit it, but once that weakness was breached the base became basically useless. So you know what? Maybe you are the Star Killer. Because you are a tough shell to crack, you don't have many weaknesses, but when yours are found and called out like a high school rumor, you fold like a tent. That is what is happening now. Your out of your element. So, stick with human, stick with the argument that sometimes you do indeed stumble, and I will respect you a whole lot more.

And a little respect is better than the goose egg I currently have in that column.

Okay, now back to regularly schedueled programming.

Jim, you are so caught up on little slip ups and words that are such a small part of the finished product. You are so caught up and laser focused on one little thing I said, that you miss the bigger picture. Put the meth pipe down and pay attention for once in you ADHD life. You look stupid. You look like you are grasping for straws. You look desperate. After all I have said, THAT is what you pull out? Why? Because you know that everything I have said about you is true. All you did was come back out with your aggressive, bordering on homo-erotic, rage and say a half hour casaroll of nonsense with ONE slip up by me in it. But like you said yourself through those scraggly lips, Jim, I am only a human. I make mistakes. I stumble. Chalk this up to human error and move on to the more pressing issue of you being the biggest fraud this company has seen in the last decade. If you want to be looked at as a "human" who makes "mistakes", then don't call the kettle black.

Speaking of calling the kettle black, you so elegantly---and when I say elegantly I mean with the elegance of an elephant through quicksand---about how I told Gabe Reno I "never do seven promos". That I can't hack it. That I can't hang. Well, at the time when this camera came on, you only had ONE. In fact, when is the last time YOU have done more than 3 or 4? Tisk, tisk, Jim. You aren't looking at yourself in the mirror before you start opening your chalky lips.

Exhibit A:

The XWF's Resident Dumbass Said:Don't talk to me about pressure, you've no idea what the word means. I was competing back to back weekly; Savage, Warfare, the LL tournament, the Federweight Scramble, the TV title...FUKA, Chris. Fuck You Know About pressure?