It is still Sunday March 5th 2017, and our lovable, meth addicted, satanically possessed, possibly closet homosexual, Kevin Bacon look-alike, Cadryn 'Big Dick' Tiberius has pulled up in Natalie's car into the driveway of his meth supplier, a man simply known as: Big Wolf Daddy.

Big Wolf Daddy is a throwback motorcycle gang banger from the late seventies who's been as of late cooking up, and supplying methamphetamine for the entire city. He usually keeps his den surrounded with a bevy of drugged out lot-lizards and some grossly underweight, rebel flag flying, biker jacket wearing redneck pricks- but today for whatever reason the Hillbilly Kingpin's palace looks oddly vacant.

Aside from a few junkies crawling around on the lawn, the place is totally ghostly. But Cadryn and Satan Cadryn notice Big Wolf Daddy's Harley in the drive way, so he steps out of the car and makes his way up to the house.

Satan Cadryn: Really? More meth already? Shouldn't you be getting in touch with your partner?

Cadryn: Buronan can wait. Leeroy is hungry, and he needs to be fed. Big Wolf Daddy has been waiting on us for hours now, and it's not exactly intelligent to keep a man like that waiting.

Cadryn approaches the impressive double wide trailer, noticing that aside from the Ted Nugent playing from inside the area is still suspiciously quiet. The door is ajar so Cadryn rather than just walking in, gives it a good, meth-fevered knock first. But no one answers.

Cadryn: Well, that's odd. He never leaves his door open like this. He's too afraid of the Goblins.

Satan Cady: There are no such thing as Goblins.

Cadryn: There is also no such thing as a pickled potato demon that burrows through buttholes, but here we are.

Satan Cady: Touche.

Cadryn: I'm reluctant to just go in. What if he thinks I am a Goblin and shoots me? Or what if he's doing things with one of his lizard ladies? I don't really want to see that.

Satan Cady: We should get ourselves a lot lizard, that would relieve some of this stress. It's not like Natalie really loves you anyways.

Cadryn: YOU SHUT YOUR WHORE MOUTH, PICKLED POTATO.

Cadryn catches some movement coming from inside the trailer out of the corner of his eye, so he pushes the door open a bit and sticks his head inside,

Cadryn: YO! WOLF DADDY! YOU HERE? IT'S CADRYN AND PICKLED POTATO! TRYING TO GET SOME OF THAT COCKTAIL I CALLED YOU ABOUT!

Cadryn actually steps in now and is aghast at what he sees. It's Big Wolf Daddy laying naked and dead on the floor, a blood stained razor blade laying next to him. His throat has been slit from ear to ear.

Cadryn: OH FUCK. THE GOBLINS GOT HIM!

Satan Cady: It wasn't the Goblins you idiot, look.

Satan Cady points to a figure sitting on the couch, just hanging out, like he isn't in the presence of a dead body, like all of this is normal..

It's Buronan! Looking rather stoic as he is receiving a lap dance from one of Wolf Daddy's lot lizards.



Lot Lizard: Cuuuuum on baybe. Let mamma git er' one more fixin'.

Buronan sighs deeply,

Buronan: Fine. But DON'T try and melt it down this time!

Buronan reaches for a broom and lifts it toward the ceiling, scraping off some of the stucco plaster down onto the floor.

Lot Lizard: Oh ats' right big boy. Make it rain on mamma.

The lot lizard pounces down onto the floor, scrounging up the tiny pieces of plaster and packing them into her aluminum foil meth pipe.

Cadryn stares off into the room perplexed. He's unsure what's more alarming. That Buronan may have killed this man, or that he's letting one of those dirty lizard women rub on his dink..

Cadryn: Dude, what the fuck is going on in here?!

Satan Cady: A good time, obviously!

Buronan: AH! Brother Cadryn! I knew you'd cum... wait a second, that was gay. Man I've been looking all over for your ass! You know, you're harder to reach then the President.

Cadryn: I NEED YOU TO BE HONEST WITH ME FOR A SECOND. ARE THERE ANY GOBLINS IN HERE, DID THEY DO ALL THIS?

Buronan: What? That?

Buronan asks pointing toward Big Wolf Daddy's body. Cadryn nods toward his new partner very fiendishly. Buronan stands up, kicking the humongous lotilious-reptilious in the rear end, causing her to topple over face first,

Lot Lizard: Aye! You baby-dick mudderfucker!

He walks over to Cadryn and puts his hands on his shoulders in a reassuring manner,

Buronan: I wouldn't harm him, notta' Nair' cleaned hair on his head I swear it! He took the cowards way out, Cadryn. You gotta' believe me!

Cadryn smiles at Buronan feeling reassured.

Cadryn: Of course I believe you, Buronan. You've got a face that we can trust!

Satan Cady: Um, dude, he totally killed him. And he's wearing a mask.

Cadryn: He said he didn't, I believe him.

Satan Cady: When is the last time you saw someone kill themselves by slitting their throat from ear to ear?

Cadryn: Yesterday?

Satan Cady: Idiot..

Buronan tilts his head quizzically toward Cadryn's conversation with himself. Then shakes his head for a second...

Buronan: Why do I always get paired up with the freaks?

He asks himself softly,

Cadryn: WHAT?!?
Satan Cadryn: WHAT?!?

Buronan: Nothing... look; whatever I've done here, I've only done it for your own good, Cadryn. You're my tag team partner, and I'm concerned about you... ABOUT US! We are so close to riding off into the Main Event of Lethal Lottery where all of your wildest meth-filled dreams will come true. But for now, I had to make sure there was going to be nothing that would hold us back, do you understand?

Cadryn: What does all of that mean?

Buronan: I killed your meth dealer and flushed his meth.

Cadryn: YOU DID WHAT?!

Suddenly Cadryn begins running around in circles.

Cadryn: The meth makes me mean, it makes me a better man, a better fighter. How could you do this?! We're going to lose for sure!

Buronan: Man... fuck that ol' pussy redneck shit, dude. I've got your real fix right here.

Buronan tackles the resisting Cadryn down to the floor and pulls from his pocket a dirty syringe with an unidentified substance inside of it, and with Cadryn being so skinny, the mainline vein in his arm is protruding and easy to hit.

Buronan jams the needle in his arm...

Cadryn: Wait! Is that thing clean?

Buronan: SURE IT IS! Me and ol' Lotty over there shared it a couple of times, but we're the only two, I SWEAR!

Buronan injects the drug into Cadryn's arm,

Cadryn: What is this shit anyway?

Buronan: It's heroine. Haven't you heard? It's all the rave these days with the scum bags and such. It will bring you powers like you've never felt before.

Lot Lizard: AYE! Wut makes him so special goddamnit!?

Buronan: SHUT YOUR MOUTH YOU STUPID WHORE AND COME SIT THAT BODACIOUS CUNT OF YOURS ON CADRYN'S FACE!

Lot Lizard: What ever you say daddy.

The woman-lizard-thing walks over and hikes up her undersized skirt as Cadryn's eyeballs begin to roll around in his skull. Buronan leans down and starts whispering to his new partner

Buronan: We're going to kill Michael Graves, Cadryn. You and your new powers are going to lead me to his home, where we will cut off his head and feed it to the poor starving West Vriginia children who's parents sale their food stamps for meth. They deserve good things. You deserve good things. WE deserve good things!

Michael has never appreciated you, he's a punk bitch who's took you for granted, and used you and your supreme talents in his promos to elevate his own status in the XWF. We're going to kill him for that before we get to Lethal Lottery, and then it'll be just me and you against that hopelessly fucked known as Little Peter having Gilmoure Girl. We're going to fuck him.. I mean kill him too.

Stay with me Cadryn. I've been planning this, I've been waiting on you for a long time. It's not me who's the important one. You are! You're the star of your own show now. You never needed me, or Michael Graves, Natalie or anyone else! You have the heroine now. You have the power now. The muck is strong with you.

Cadryn's eyes roll back into oblivion as the Lot Lizard edges her vagina closer to his face.

Buronan: Drink it in, Cadryn. Her cooter tastes just like wolf pussy.

The scene fades out leaving us all feeling very uncomfortable.