We're home from the hospital. Mom gave up her wheelchair, so I could use it. She had to hobble back to the car, but I was winded and nervous from my journey to the hospital. She had a cane to use, and people to help her move. I just had me. I needed it, not like Luca was here to help me to the car. That would have been perfect. Carried to the car by my knight in shining armor, Luca. Oh, how I dream of the day something like that happens to me. My sweet #Memequeen descends from the heavens and gives me his sweet hug as he carries me to the car in which we drive off to our newest house of love. Not that Luca or I are gay. He's a genderless creature of perfection, and thus we can't be .

We're home, and I'm sitting in the kitchen trying to catch my breath while my dad walks around the house trying to make things easier for mom and I to get around while we recover. Her recovery will be quick, I hope. Mine could take forever. I may never leave the house again. This was a terrifying experience, I had to step into the sun, and it was blinding. The doctor checked me for Glaucoma, he said I don't have any, but I don't believe him. Mother will have to call and make an appointment with my regular optometrist tomorrow. This is serious, and I need to see an oncologist. What if the sun gave me skin cancer? That'd be terrible. I don't want to lose my skin because mom couldn't help but have a fucking heart attack. Luca Dammit, this was bad timing on her part. The selfish bitch.

So, mom is going around the kitchen trying to get me food so I don't die. Dad is upstairs trying to fight to bring down a bed for mom to sleep in the living room on. He's screaming for something, but none of us can hear him. There's a thud, and then a scream. Mom tries to rush over to help him, I'm sitting down eating my lunchable still. He yelled at me, I'm not helping him until I know both my blood pressure, and blood sugar are normal. He gets downstairs before mom makes it out of the kitchen. His face is red, and he's clearly not happy at something. Big deal, he's never happy.

Hey, dad.

JEFFEREY MYRON FERNANDO! I called you to come help me five fucking times!

Ronald, please stop yelling at the boy. He's under a lot of stress, and I haven't made his meatloaf yet. You know Hashtag Avant Garde Guy gets antsy without his meatloaf. Please, sit down and stop yelling at the boy. He's just been through a lot.

Dad comes storming into the kitchen and slaps me across the face. He's not putting up with me tonight. He's super pissed. I go down. His fists are railing into my face, and I'm bleeding. Mom is screaming at him to stop, but he isn't stopping.

YOUR NAME IS FUCKING JEFFEREY MYRON FERNANDO! NOT HASHTAG SHIT! FUCKING GOT IT? AND START ACTING LIKE A NORMAL FUCKING ADULT FOR GOD'S SAKE!!!

His fist hurts, but not as bad as the blasphemy he's thrown down by using the wrong name for our Lord and Savior. I start screaming and push him off of me. I stand up and look down on him. I feel a change in me. And then it happens. I transform.



I am now the Alpha nerd. I am the king of the nerds. The one true nerd to rule them all.

My name is Hashtag Avant Garde Guy. You will use it when addressing me, and I will not answer to my slave name. Now, go get me meatloaf.

Dad stands up and looks at me. He is unimpressed. He punches me in the face, and it slams be back into the fridge. Mom is screaming, and then she begins to glow.



Ronald! Take your hands off of my boy, and enjoy some goddamn meatloaf. I won't ask you again.

Dad looks at her and storms out of the house without saying a word. The bitch. He's afraid of my status.

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Hello, Luna. Nice to meet you again. This time it will be different, I can promise you that. I'm the Supreme Nerd now. And now? Now I cannot be hurt by your weakness. Go bring me meatloaf and play Asgard some more.