Amjetkun Socio's face is all swollen like he's been stung by a bunch of crazy bees.

Socio: "Alright kids welcome to the DAAAAWG HOUSE and we're calling it that shit because we're gonna mainly be talking about one big old nasty stanky bitch... and I do mean BITCH up in this bitch. I plan to get this bitch drunk off my greatness in that boiler room match and then I'm going to seduce her with my raw talent, breaking out my perfectly executed Elvis voice and serenading that beast!"

Amjetkun grabs a can of steroids and squeezes it, the lid just popping right off and the "juice" all popping up and right into his mouth. When he swallows the load, his muscles all start to spark and fizzle for a few seconds before he gets even bigger right before our eyes! His arms just doubled in size! This is so fucking awesome!

Socio: (in Elvis singing voice)"You ain't nothin' but a hooouuund dooogggg... stupid bitch all the time. Ain't nothin but a dirty ass ugly hooooouuund doooogggg... quit yer bitchin all the time!"

Despite his horrifically swollen face, his singing skills attract a small group of around 300 young girls, all screaming and yelling for Socio.

Socio: "Hey whores! You want to hear about a stupid bitch right quick?

All the girls start hopping in excitement.

Socio: "There's this ugly ass hooker named Alexis Riot who I'm gonna beat the fuck out of on Wednesday and she's a real bitch."

The girls start rubbing his muscles which seem to be pulsating in an unnatural manner, kind of like the pulsating of a really good bass speaker but there's no damn music coming out of this dude's arms so what the fuck...

Socio: "This dumb bitch thinks my promo earlier this week was shit!"

The girls all start to boo and say nasty things about Alexis. One of them draws a picture on the wall with some lipstick of Alexis Riot sucking a dog's dick.

Socio: "You know what's funny though? I didn't air no fucking promo earlier this week you dumb bitch! What you saw was some leaked footage of me IN THE BATHROOM with my drunk neighbor singing crazy random shit in the shower because his shower was broken so I let him use mine don't you dare make a big deal about it or try and turn this gay you idiot. WHew what a mouthful. Ok so wow, back on track, this stupid whore Alexis is supposed to been a wrestler for a long time now and still doesn't know a promo from some random leaked bathroom footage? I mean DUDE I even said this in the leaked footage... Listen up..."

All the girls pay attention as a flatscreen slowly lowers from above and plays this

(02-20-2016, 08:13 AM)Amjetkun Path Maker Socio The Great Said: Amjetkun Socio "Fuck this I'm not cutting a promo until that stupid bitch does. Why the hell should I go first?"

(patting chest)"I drive the Benz!" (open hand smacking his chest) "I set the trends!"

(making the call me sign with his fingers and jiggling it in front of his bulging crotch)"Call me when the bitch finally grows a sack and drops a damn promo on my ass!"

Amjetkun holds his hands out like "see!?!??" and all the girls nod and agree. Some of them start shaking their heads at Alexis' foolishness.

"Does this Alexis whore not speak English or something?"

"Yeah no kidding I Mean it sounded clear to me, like really clear and stuff. What a stupid whore!"

"I bet that whore thinks she's gonna get with you. This is her way of like play flirting with you or something. Like a flirty way of hitting on you and teasing you. Now she hopes you'll spank her really hard for it. What a whore!"

"Yeah I know! Right? I've been saying she's a whore! And all she does is bellyache about people she's either jealous or scared of." (in a really nasally sounding whore voice)"Oh look at me I'm Alexis Riot and I think Amjetkun Socio does bad promos. I'm cool. Go me. Wow, I also think Pest is a pedophile. Look at me. I would have beat Peter Gilmour if Socio didn't distract me with his raw sexiness during the match, just by standing there like he did, innocent of any wrong doing."

All the girls just laugh at the expense of the XWF's top bellyacher.

"Want to know what else that crazy bitch said? She accused me of liking my own promo?"

"What's that even mean?"

"Yeah, especially if there was no promo but only creepy bathroom footage she should have turned her eyes away from instead of watching?"

"Good question! But yeah she accused me of liking my own promo, something that's just crazy! You can't like your own promo! Dumb bitch! Fuck you in the asshole with that wild ass accusation. What's worse though is she committed a crime right after that."

"She did? What kind of crime? Being an ugly whore?"

"Well yeah but she also pissed off Captain Jean-Luc Picard of the USS Enterprise! She used him in her stupid ass promo without getting his permission!"

All the girls gasp in shock and disappointment.

but then.........it happens...

"That's right..." That voice! It's him! Captain Jean-Luc Picard of the USS Enterprise and former guest host of SHOVE IT Into Space! One of the most amazing and out of this world Shove Its of all time! He doesn't look pleased.

"I am pretty pissed off about that whore using that very popular facepalm footage of me in her promo without my goddamned permission. Has she no respect for authority? Does she not know her XWF history? Is she a as much as a whore? I WAS A HOST OF THE MOST POPULAR SHOVE IT EPISODE OF ALL TIME! That means I am not only her Captain, but I am also her Pimp now."

All the girls are cheering Captain Jean-Luc Picard of the USS Enterprise on!

"Yeah, Captain! She's fucked now! She was already dead when she made me mad but now she ticked you off bro? She's so owned."

"Owned is a good way to put it. I heard after you beat her she has to stay in the XWF forever as your sex slave? That's smart business right there."

"Yeah but if she cheats to beat me I can't take my vitamins anymore and have to get a sex change!"

Amjetkun is sweating profusely and loosening his collar but it's not really clear if that's just because he's on tons of shit that has his heart pumping at 600 miles an hour or if he's afraid of the match stipulations...

"Ha ha ha, well that wasn't the smartest business decision right there. You better hope that whore doesn't cheat you!"

"Don't worry Captain. When that bitch whore wakes up after losing to me, she'll see me and you both standing over her. That's right I'm going to let you stick around and Pimp her like only Captain Jean-Luc Picard of the USS Enterprise can Pimp a whore. You're going to make so much money off of that whore."

"Very generous to use your sex slave ownership over her as a way to force her into being legally Pimped by me 4 Life. I appreciate that shit, homie."

"Oh you got it broh. No doubt. You know you my dawg."

Captain Picard and Amjetkun Socio slap hands and bump fists. All the girls start throwing their bras and panties at them. It looks like things are going to get really good for Amjetkun The Path Maker Socio The Great and Captain Jean-Luc Picard of the USS Enterprise... and it looks like Alexis Riot has bitten off more than she can chew. There's no way that whore can bounce back from this.


"Hey whore. Hey bitch. You listening? Yeah, you're listening. Because your ears aren't what's clogged right now... it's your MOUTH with your FOOT! Stupid cunt! I bet you feel real stupid right now coming out and talking shit about me and my promo when, hello, ding dong bitch anybody home, THERE WAS NO PROMO. How the hell does a former champion in the XWF not know the difference between if she's watching a promo or if she's watching some weird ass washroom footage that she shouldn't even have had access to?"

"I'm sorry little whore girl but leaked bathroom footage is not a promo, plus as I pointed out earlier I was heard complaining about you right on the tape and I was heard saying I ain't cutting a fucking promo until you do! You just got knocked da fuck out! This shit's over before it even begins. It's like when I think I have to take a dump and I rush to the bathroom only to find that the shit is already in my pants! And the experience is just as nasty too, so maybe you should work on making yourself a little more enjoyable to be booked against because quite frankly whore I'm about ready to vomit my last 8 meals up just thinking about dealing with your nasty whore ass."

"SO ok wow, what now? You gonna come back and talk about how THIS promo sucked dick? Well bitch it's already off the charts compared to yours because mine has something really awesome actually happening before we get to this part where I'm just straight shooting on a bitch. Whore before I started eating you alive right now, I dazzled the fans with the makings of a breath taking, nail biting story now that I brought Captain Jean-Luc Picard of the USS Enterprise into the mix. Your first promo is just you talking about some bathroom footage you saw and mistaking it for a promo. Wow what a comparison! You blew it! If people judged our promos so far this week to decide which one of us is really fucking awesome and which one of us is a stupid dirty whore, guess who would be the awesome one? That's right bitch that would be the man every woman thinks about when they fuck their ugly skinny men! I win! Me! Hahaha! You want to just retire now whore? Oh wait you can't retire because if you don't win this match you're my eternal XWF sex slave! I sure hope you're practicing kneeling in uncooked rice and rock salt to get those knees ready for me baby. Because you're going to be on those knees a lot!"

"The best thing you can do next whore is two things!"

"First you admit to the world that I am the reason you ever won the X-treme title in the first place."

"Second you admit to the world that I am the reason you won that gauntlet."

"Third you admit to the world that I never poked you with my giant needle and you just fall over in the middle of your match with Gilmour either A because he's the superior athlete or B because you fainted after seeing how sexy I am. Take your pick but either way you need to admit everything and just come clean already. It's one thing to be a bitch and a whore but do you really want to be a dirty bitch and a dirty whore?"

"Fourth, admit you love me. Admit you think about me when you're in bed at night and your fingers begin to wander. Admit that Amjetkun Socio's massive mountains of man meat are on your mind damn near 24/7 and admit to the world that you see me as THE perfect male specimen. Admit that it's me on your mind when you're renting your snatch out to all those dudes who pick you up on your corners. Just end the charade already whore. We can be together boo if you just come clean about your love, but if you keep playing like you've been, I might have to get really violent when we meet in that boiler room. I might have to put it in your ass. With no lube."