Threaded Mode | Linear Mode

LH Harrison · (09-10-2014)

LH Harrison is backstage pacing back and forth. He spots the cameraman and gives him a thumbs up, but he looks like he’s about to be sick. He stops puts a finger up and then proceeds to pace.

Sorry for the pacing, but I’m nervous about going out in front of all of those people. I know I do it on the weekly in the XWF, but this is different. These people know me. They know me better than anyone else does. They basically can read my mind. Whew. Well, wish me luck!

LH Harrison walks through the curtain and the camera angle changes to the camera on the other side. LH Harrison walks onto the stage and the crowd is applauding loudly. As he walks out, the familiar music begins to play.

The announcer calls over the speaker system, “This is Jeopardy!” The huge word is written on the wall behind where LH Harrison has taken his stance behind the podium on the left side of the stage.

[Image: journalism-GEE-OH-PARTY.jpg]

Welcome ladies and gentlemen to yet another edition of Jeopardy! I am your host, LH Harrison, but I’m sure you already knew that.

The crowd applauds furiously as LH Harrison has to step away from the podium to take a bow. They seem to react even better to that.

Now, now let’s get on with introducing our contestants. First, hailing from Hope, AR, we have Croco!

“G’day mate.”

Oh you’re from Australia?

“BLEEP no! I just like talking like them. C’mon now mate.”

Alrighty then, our next contestant also hails from Hope, AR, and his name is LH Hazarus.

LH Hazarus is standing in a neutral black suit and stares straight ahead through the wall in front of him. LH Harrison walks up and waves his hand in front of his Hazarus’ face to no avail. LH Harrison shrugs and walks back over to his side of the room.

Well that’s weird. But last we have our defending champion with $22,000 and one game is Loverson!

Loverson: OWWW The Boys are back in town! The boys are back in towwwwowwwowwwwwn! What’s happening LH Cool J?

Well not much other than running a good ol’ game of Jeopardy.

The crowd laughs and the camera scans the audience showing different versions of LH including Masterson trying to control the mind of Ozymandison who is rolling his eyes. LH Zi is about to light up a cigar, but LH Gilmorson smacks it out of his hand and laughs. A shadowy figure is sitting at the top of the bleachers wearing a long trench coat and a large wizard hat. Doctor Harrison is down at the bottom talking eerily to Chris Famison about taking an examination. The camera changes camera angles back to LH Harrison on the stage.

Now let’s show our categories.

[Image: c3Tp0n9.png]

Our first category is ‘LH Facts’ which should be rather easy for you guys considering… you’re all in my head.

“Hey! Speak for yourself. I’m in my head and my head alone… and I’m talking in the reader’s head. Hi reader! Omg Ozy stop picking your nose. Or at least BLEEP share.”

Ahem. The next category is ‘Luca Characters.’ One participant should be rather good at that anyways.

LH Harrison looks directly at LH Hazarus who is staring straight ahead and seems to not have heard anything they’ve said. Loverson pokes LH Hazarus, but he still stares.

Well maybe not. Third category is Shove It Yourself. This will be info on the latest Shove It Weekend edition entitled ‘SUPER Shove It.’

”Hey I won at that!”

Loverson: Me too!

The two air high-five. LH Harrison shakes his head and turns back towards the board.

The fourth category is Cain Victims. This will be questions involving those that have been murdered by Cain such as Sac-

Did I hear my fucking name?

The shadowy figure stands up at the top of the bleachers and begins walking down as the others in the crowd stares at him in confusion. The figure steps onto the stage and throws off his coat and hat to reveal that large demonic smile and red and black swirl in his eyes. LH The Great is back yet again.

What do you want? You aren’t a contestant!

This is our head. I don’t think the viewers at home are going to mind.

Now. We need to talk, LH. You can’t just run around challenging Cain.

Why? He’s on the list. He caused me to murder that man… he… he altered my way of thinking. He’s the fault for everything that’s happened the last few weeks! Why shouldn’t I challenge him?

Because of what happened last time you fought? You murdered a man the next day. Do you really want to rehash that experience? Do you want me around more? You’ve proven it. You’ve beaten him. This match will prove nothing! Unless you just want to see me around more?

He smiles that devilish grin as he licks his lips. LH stares at the floor in frustration.

No! I need this win to… to… to cleanse Madness.

LH The Great stares at LH Harrison and starts laughing.

You’re going to get your throat slit out there, LH. And I’m going to be there in the back of your head telling you over and over again. ‘You shouldn’t have fucked with Cain, you shouldn’t have fucked with Cain, you shouldn’t… have fucked…. with Cain.’

LH Harrison looks up from the floor to meet the red and black swirl of eyes.

I need this win to… to prove it to myself. I’ve lost every match in the XWF. Every single one. Except for one, but do you know who my partner was that day?

‘Loverboy’ Vinnie Lane.

Loverboy has yet to lose a single match. And who got the pinfall in that match?

‘Loverboy’ Vinnie Lane.

I don’t need this match because I’ve beaten him before. I need this match to prove to myself that that wasn’t Loverboy holding my hand. I need this match to prove to myself that I am Madness-worthy. If not, then I may as well leave.

The demon seems to evaluate this and approve of what LH has said.

Good luck Mr. LH. This will be our final confrontation. But if you ever need a side that’s a little more fucking twisted. Look within and pull out LH The Great.

The demon smiles as he slowly fades into nothing. LH Harrison looks to the audience and they all fade away. He looks at the panel and LH Lazarus begins fading away. Suddenly he seems like he has something to say, but he disappears before he can.

“How come he got to BLEEP cuss?! Where was his BLEEP bleeps?”

Croco fades away into the nothingness. LH Harrison walks up to Loverson and stares him straight in the eye as he begins to fade away.

I will prove myself. I will prove that I don’t need Loverboy to win a match. My time…. Is now.

Loverson disappears and the walls change from the set of a Jeopardy studio into the park at Munich, Germany at 11:00 PM. LH Harrison takes a look around before turning away and walking to his rental car.

Threaded Mode \| Linear Mode LH Harrison In Jeopardy!
Author	Message