Prelude:

The X-Treme Wrestling Federation! The home to some of the most impressive superstars in the professional wrestling world, without question the most amazing of all is; Mister. Russell Mania. While a relative newcombed to the XWF Universe, Russell Mania is a seasoned ring veteran with a 20+ year history of beating people to a senseless pulp in the middle of the ring. The last time Russell Mania had been given a championship opportunity was in 2002 at an independent wrestling show in Cincinnati, Ohio when he and a local performer had briefly captured the promotions tag team titles.

Russell Mania, while a serious in-ring presence has been limited in the number of championship opportunities he has been given because he never felt the companies mold, while Mania dominates as a singles competitor he is often a victim of poor booking by a creative team who has no idea how to utilize him in a serious capacity and if often thrown in random tag team matches or used as filler in bullshit gimmick matches like "24 man tag matches, battle royals, lumberjack matches and gauntlet matches"... But that was all about to change! Finally he was going to escape those ridiculous gimmick matches and be treated as a serious competitor. Mania didn't know what XWF management had in store for him for his Wednesday Night Warfare debut all he knew for sure was the XWF had better sense then to waste his grand Wednesday Night Warfare debut on a gimmick match.....


Scene #1:

Just four short nights away from Russell Mania's big debut on Wednesday Night Warfare and after getting the phone call from XWF's head of talent relations to have his gear ready of Wednesday, Mr. Mania could not be more excited. We see Russell in what appears to be his home, he is sitting down at his kitchen table his cell phone in his hand, waiting anxiously for the phone to ring. Russell stands up from the table and walks over to his fridge, he opens the fridge door and pulls out a bottle of Corona, he walks back over to the table and picks up his phone and walks down the hallway, he gets to his bedroom and opens the door a crack and sees Cameron and Naomi both sleeping in his bed, on of Camerons legs are sticking out from uder the blanket and Russell licks his lips and smiles as he slowly and quietly steps into the room.

Russell looks at his phone one more time, still nothing. He takes a few steps closer to his massive King Size bed and turns the ringer off on his phone before setting it down on the bedside table, he licks his lips and sits down beside Camerons exposed leg. Mania moves his head down by Cameron foot and sniffs it before kissing softly lifting her foot to his mouth and beginning to suck on her toes. Mania lets out a gasp of sensual pleasure before taking her toes out of his mouth and kissing her foot all over, he then begins to kiss her ankle and slowly starts to kiss up her leg! He slowly approaces her bikini line and starts to smell her pubic area, he takes in a deep breath and lets out a gasp of desire. He pushes the blanket aside to see that she is only wear a t-shirt and a black thong, he completely removes the blanket from Camerons body and begins to gently remove her panties. He pulls the panties off of her toes while she remains asleep and crawls between her legs and slowly pulls the blanket back over himself and Cameron and the former Funk-A-Dactyl begins to giggle and moan with pleasure, her eyes widen and she wraps her legs around Russell's face and begins to thrust harder onto him, she raises her legs high into the air and kicks them back and forth while she moans in pleasure. She begins to speed up her thrusts onto Russell's face and finally lets out a final depp gasp before beginning to slow down. Her body continues to flex as she calms down and finally we see Russell Mania come out from under the blankets, he lays next to Cameron, looking down at her, he places his hand on her breast and gives it a little squeeze which causes her to let out another small moan, she places her hand on the back of Russell's head and the two share a passionate kiss.

Cameron smiles into Russell's eyes and reaches her hand down and undoes his belt buckle, the sound of his zipper being unzipped can be heard. Russell shuffles out of his pants and Cameron wraps her hand around his cock. *It's your turn now baby, did you bring condoms?* says Cameron; Russell looks at her and smiles. *Do we need them?* he says. Cameron looks at him and smiles and seductively *I was going to tell you not to use them anyway* she replies back smiling. Russell looks back at her with an ear to ear grin and slowly enters her, he begins to thrust away on top of her, her legs wrapped around his waist. Finally Naomi awakes and sees what is taking place just 4 feet away from her, she sits up and quickly rolls over to Russell who is pounding away at Cameron. Naomi while watching removes her shirt revealing her huge bare breasts, now wearing only a pair of panties. Mania stares at Naomi and winks at her, Naomi begins to kiss Cameron passionately on the lips putting her tounge deep into her mouth while Mania continues to thrust away, he pulls himself out of Cameron and snaps his fingers at Naomi. *Get over here* he tells her. Naomi listens and gets on her knees on the bed and begins to shake her fat ass around at Mania, Mania licks his lips and rips off her thong panties and enters her from behind, he begins to thrust inside of her for several minutes while Cameron lays beside rubbing Naomi breasts and kissing her. And after what seemed like an eternity Russell Mania finally finishes and the three share a three-way kiss.

The three then get off the bed and make their way into the washroom. Russell turns on the shower and the three all hop in, steam rolls out of the shower as Cameron and Naomi begins to rub soap over Russell Mania's hairy body, then they begin to rub soap over each other's bodies while Mania watches on with a smirk. He then remembers that he was awaiting a very important phone call from XWF headquarters regarding who his opponent would be on his Wednesday Night Warfare debut. *I'm sorry ladies, I'm going to go get dressed, I've got a lot to do today but I will see you both again, very soon" Russell says as he exits the showers, he wraps a white towel around his waist while Cameron and Naomi try to coax him into coming back into the shower. Mania leaves the bathroom and sees that his phone is blinking, he picks it up..."1 New Message" the phone reads. "Shit!" exclaims Mania as he anxiously checks his voicemail.

Voicemail Message:

Hi Russell, it's Bill with talent relations just letting you know that creative wanted me to run by this idea they had for you for this upcoming Warfare card on July 31st, I know you were hoping for more of a one-on-one kind of deal but they want to put you in this Gauntlet Match with nine other guys and if you win then you will be the number on contender for the X-Treme Championship! Like I said I know it's not something that you have been wanting to do BUT the creative guys have a deadline to meet and your not answering your phone so I'm going to tell them to go ahead and put you in there. Hope thats cool. Talk to you Thursday. *BEEP*

Russell Mania stares blankly at the floor, once again yet another promotion is writing him off as a gimmick wrestler who is best used for filler in gimmick matches! Once again he was a part of a Gauntlet Match... Whats next? A lumberjack? A battle royal entrant? One of the Undertakers druids? This was the last straw, Russell Mania was done being a gimmick, it was time Russell Mania went somewhere he'd be appreciated! It's time Mister. Russell Mania packed his bags and went to the BIG TIME!

Scene #2 - 2 hours later

One-hundred and twenty minutes had passed since Russell Mania learned that the "Powers The Be" withing the XWF were nothing more then the same moronic, uneducated, bafoons he had dealt with his entire wrestling career, they had no idea how to work with someone like Russell Mania and Russell knew he, he knew that even though he was the XWF's BIGGEST star he would continue to play a supporting role to everyone who fit the XWF's mold he knew that there was no way that he was going to waste anymore of his life working for promoters without a clue.... Russell, along with Naomi and Cameron had left Russell's home and are now on the road. After nearly 30 attemptes Bill with XWF's talent relations finally picked up the phone.

Bill: Hello?

~Mister. Russell Mania~: Yeah! Bill! What the fuck is the shit about a Gauntlet Match! I don't want my debut match to be in a Gauntlet Match! I am not some JOBBER like Guy Toadie or Salman Van Dam! I deserve to be in a HIGH PROFILE debut match! This is bullshit! I want out of the match or I want OUT of the XWF! Simple as that change the match or I am outta here Bill!

Bill: Come on Russell! It's too late to change it now the show is booked! There is nothing we can do! Lets work on getting something set up for next week! How does that sound?

~Mister. Russell Mania~: Next week isn't my Wednesday Night Warfare debut is it? NO! I don't want to be in some stupid Gauntlet Match! Wheres that fat piece of garbage Viscera?

Bill: To be quite honest the original plans called for you to face Viscera but ever since you call him out no one has heard from him! Some people are starting to worry... He sent Salman Van Dam a text that said "The dogs are in the enclosed pool area. Garage side door is open." But no one knows what thats all about.

~Mister. Russell Mania~: Doesn't sound to me like you have anything to worry about in terms of Big V! But he's not your problem! I'm your problem because I am on the road right now, headed to Stamford, Conneticut to meet with Stephanie McMahon and Triple H about signing an EXCLUSIVE WWE contract! That's right! I'm going to the big time baby!!!!

Bill: Come on Russ, come back to the office and we will talk about this... Please?

~Mister. Russell Mania~: Are you going to take me out of the match?

Bill: I just can't do that Russell, I already gave the writers the "Okay" to write you in... It's just too late BUT we will work on something for next week! Just think about this Russ.

~Mister. Russell Mania~: I have thought about it Bill and I don't fit the XWF mold! I fit the WWE mold! Fuck XWF i'm headed to greener grasses BAYBUH!

Russell turns off the phone and continues to drive, the phone begins to ring and he checks the call display... "XWF HQ" it reads. Mania picks up the phone and tosses it over his shoulder into the backseat.....

Scene #3: - WWE Headquarters- 2 days later

After a two day long car drive from The California Valley to Stamford, Conneticut an exhausted Russell Mania finally arrives at WWE Headquarters still asking himself "Why didn't I just get on a plane?".... With forty-fice minutes to spare Mania looks back at Cameron and Naomi who are sleeping heavily in the backseat. Mania notices in the distance a vacancy sign on a Stamford Hotel, he quickly drives down to the hotel and pulls his Pink Cadillac into a parking space.



He gets out of the car and walks into the hotel office, he cracks open the door and sees an old Asian man working behind the counter, the office smells of stale junk food, cheap air freshner and old people!

Hotel Attendant: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Hello Yes you need one room?

~Mister. Russell Mania~: Ah hello yes! Yes I will be needing one room! How much will that be?
[color=#FF00BFFF]
Hotel Attendant:[/color] How long you stay for?

~Mister. Russell Mania~: Um, I stay for one night!

Hotel Attendant: Ahhhhhhh yes one niiiight! seventifiedola pleassir.

~Mister. Russell Mania~: Um.... I don't know what the fuck you just said but here's $200! Use whatever left to clean up the mess I make tonight.

The attendant walks away to get the key and Mania sees that on the television behind him there is a commercial promotion the upcoming XWF: Monday Madness, heavily being promoted in this video is current XWF Television Champion; Mr. Satellite!... Mr. Mania chuckles to himself *What a * he says as the commercial ended. The attendant then returns and passes Mania the key. *Thank you* says Mania who immediatly leaves the office and goes out to the car and awakes the girls.

Scene #4: - The BIG Meeting

After dropping Cameron and Naomi off at the hotel Russell Mania was ready to have the biggest interview of his life! The job interview with the WWE! This wasn't Mania's first time trying out with the WWE but it was the first time in a long time. The last time Mania tried out with WWE it was in a dark match prior to WWE Raw in October/1999 when he was defeated by Al Snow! His first try out with WWE was in 1991 when he was paired with another local competitor to compete in a squash match against a tag team known as "The Natural Disasters" Earthquake and Typhoon. Mania, now a middle aged man well into his 40's realizes this is in all likelihood his last chance to make it into the WWE! Mania, staying true to his character is wearing a full disco suit, shades and suede shoes as he enters the doors of WWE: HQ.



Mania looks around at a building he has seen so many times, but never got to know very well! He looked around and the halls of WWE headquarters at the legends, so many of which he got to know on the independent circuit throughout his long career, he walks up to the front desk.

WWE Employee: Hello, how can I help you?

~Mister. Russell Mania~: Yes, I have a 3:30 appointment with Mr. Helmsley!

WWE Employee: Name?

~Mister. Russell Mania~:*GASP* Are you kidding me? You don't know who I am?

WWE Employee: No. Name please?

~Mister. Russell Mania~: My name is MISTER. Russell Mania and if your going to be working for a wrestling company then you should already know that!

WWE Employee: I'm sorry, sir. Please take a seat and Mrs. Helmsley will be with you.

Russell's eyebrows raise in curiousity.

~Mister. Russell Mania~: "Mrs. Helmsley?" My interview is with Triple H.

WWE Employee: Yes I know but Mr. Helmsley is not available he is in an important meeting with some of our top talent right now, he has said to send you up to talk to Steph.

Russell looks surprised and shruges his shoulders and begins to walk away. *Sixth floor 3rd office on your right* the lady behind the desk yells as Mania walks down the hall towards the elevator.

-----------------3 Minutes Later----------------

Russell reaches a door that reads Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley/ Executive Vice President. *knock,knock* as Russell taps on Stephanies door, she looks up from her desk and see's Russell at the door.

~Mister. Russell Mania~: Hey Stephy baybuh...

Mania says with a cocky smirk as he closes the door, *I'm here.*

Stephanie: You're not supposed to be here until three thirty.

*Baybuh look at the clock* he says while pointing to Stephanie's clock which
now clearly read three forty five.

*I've been waiting for you to call me in...* Mania says with a grin.

Stephanie's face goes read with embarrassment, *Oh I'm sorry Russell... I got
caught up in my work.*

*Sure...* Mania grins, "Are you sure you were working, cause it looked to me
you were about to do something else."

Stephanie: I am your potential boss Mr. Mania, so I suggest you watch your tone

Mania smirks and moves over behind the desk. He grabs the back of
Stephanie's chair and twirls it around. *Baybuh there's a whole lot of other
things I want to watch right here.*

Stephanie looks at him with a raised eyebrow, *What the hell do you think
you're doing?*

Mania smirks, *Doing things MY WAY...* He runs a hand through Stephanie's
sexy blond hair.

*I happen to be married to Triple H* Stephanie says as she locks eyes with
him.

*Baybuh really he cant even begin to think about pleasing you the way I
can... with these hands that would softly stroke and caress your beautiful
breasts... going down to your very flat stomach and then... sweet surrender
Stephanie,* Mania licks his lips.

Stephanie looks up at him, *You... you wouldn't even know what to do with
me...*

Mania smirks, *Give me a chance baby, and I'll give you your RussellMania Moment...* He leans on her chair and raises a hand to gently press two fingers
against her lips when she starts to speak "Relax baby... let me show you what
RussellMania is all about." he starts kissing her gently slipping his tongue
inside of her mouth while cupping her face with his hands.

Stephanie eyes flare a bit as his tongue violates her mouth. She tries to
push him off, but soon starts to fall for the forceful yet gentle he's
kissing her. Stephanie slowly places her hands on Mania's strong arms, and
slides her tongue against his. He leans down picking her up carrying her over
to the small couch she has in her office and lays her down on it.

*He doesn't deserve you Stephanie Marie... your too good for him* He begins
to unbutton her pale blue blouse smiling when he finds a simple white bra
underneath. *No flowers and lace baybuh?*

Stephanie blushes a bit and shakes her head, *No... didn't picked... them
out... today...*

Mania slowly eases her blouse off of her body and down her arms, followed
by removing her bra. He then moves his hands over Stephanie's breasts, and
she gasps a bit at how gentle he is. *You like that baby?* Stephanie whimpers
a little and nods. *Good... because you haven't experienced anything yet...*

Mania lowers his head and gently flicks his tongue against her nipple
causing her to moan softly *He's not gentle with you is he Stephanie?*

*We just... No he isn't* she admitted quietly and Russell shakes his head.

*Pity... a woman like you should be savored, made love to slowly until your
crying out and begging the man with you to make you scream.*

Stephanie moans a little and then licks her lips, *Are... are you such a
man... *Mania slowly moves a hand underneath her skirt and rubs her
panty-covered pussy slowly, *Yes I am...* Mania moves off the couch and
kneels on the floor. He slowly takes down her skirt, and then rubs her
legs as he kisses her belly button. Mania then bites her panties and
lowers them with his teeth. Stephanie simply watches him, becoming very
aroused at the show this man is presenting right in front of her. Russell
looks up into her eyes before slowly parting her legs and licking the
outside of her pussy.... Suddenly Steaphanies husband, the COO of WWE; Triple H
walks into the room!

Triple H: What the hell is going on in here!!!!!

Stephanie McMahon: Hunter, it's not at all what it looks like!

~Mister. Russell Mania~: I was just showing her some "wrestling moves"

Mania stands up and wipes his mouth and stands up and begins to try and reason with Triple H but The Game kicks Mania in the gut and nails him with a shot to to nose that knocks Mania to the floor. *Hunter, STOP!* Stephanie screams and Hunter shoves everything off of Stephanie's desk and pulls Mania to his feet and nails him with several knees to the midsection! He walks Mania over to Stephanie desk and begins to repeatedly smash his head into the desk until Manias forehead is busted wide open! Mania falls hard to the floor and Hunter walks to the other side of the desk! He flips the desk over on top of Mania! He picks Mania up off of the floor again and nails him with another right hand to the face which knocks Mania down to the floor again. Stephanie McMahon gets on the phone and calls for security to come stop the situation as Triple H pulls Mania back to his feet again and sends him crashing through the office wall! drywall dust and blood now covers Mania's clothes And Triple H hears the footsteps of security running up the hall. Hunter in an act of anger closes the office door and locks it preventing security from stopping his dismantling of Russell Mania! *Your a Piece Of Shit!* Hunter yells to Mania as he walks over to his bloody body before kicking Main several times! He once again pulls Mania up by the hair and tosses him on to the desk. Triple H then hops up on to the desk as well and pulls Mania up into the Pedigree position! He nails Mania with a viscous Peidgree on top of the desk and Mania rolls off of the desk seemingly unconscious as Triple H hops off the desk. Stephanie runs over to Hunter acting like she was a complete victim.

Stephanie McMahon: I am so sorry, Hunter. I was just doing my job and he came up and attacked me... I was completely defenseless!

Triple H: Don't worry baby, you'll neer see that pathetic peice of shit in this town again!

Security and police break in through to office door and see the carnage that unfolded within the office. Police and security rush to Triple H while a few EMT's begin to work on Mania. *Get his worthless ass out of here* yells Triple H as the EMT's load Russell on to a stretcher and wheel him out. Triple H puts his arm around a crying Stephanie as the scene fades to black.

Scene #5: Emergency Room!

We are now in the Stamford hospital, room A005 where Mister. Russell Mania has been rushed following the beatdown he sustained at the hands of WWE COO; Triple H. Russell is just awakening for the first time since the attack and he sees the doctor talking with a nurse about the injuries he sustained.

Doctor: The patient sustained numerous blows to the head mild concussion! But ultimately he should be ok to go home by morning if things keep progressing at the pace they are, he will require a prescription for pain medication, I will leave the prescription on the front desk.

Nurse: Ok, I will let you know as soon as he awakes.

The doctor leaves the room and the nurse walks over to the bed and begins to fluff Mania's pillow, her breasts rubbing in Mania's face! Then to Russell's surprise the nurse, thinking Russell was still asleep began to rub her hand down Russell's chest to his cock! Russell began to get hard feeling this horny nurse molest him while thinking he was asleep, the nurse grabs his cock and look at it with an impressed expression and taps his sack one time before covering him back up and leaving the room. As soon as the door closes Mania sits up with a huge grin! *Well that was just fantastic* he says smiling gleefully. He then looks into a mirror and sees his battered face following the attack from Triple H. Suddenly the his phone begins to ring and he sees it on the bedside table, he picks up the phone wondering who it could be.

~Mister. Russell Mania~: Hello?

Bill: Russell it's Bill, with the XWF! I was just wondering how your meeting with the WWE went today? Now XWF doesn't have a "no-compete clause" but I do need you to come in and sign your departure papers before you start working for Vince! I can fax them to you if you like.

Russell stares off into nothingness after hearing what Bill had just said. He took a big gulp and put on a classic, confident Russell Mania smile.

~Mister. Russell Mania~: Ya know what, Bill?..... I sat down with Hunter and Stephanie and honestly they tried really hard to sign me... I am pretty sure Triple H was willing to let me sleep with his wife if I agreed to sign on... But Ummmm... I've been doing some soul searching... And ....ummmm....ahhha....umahaham..... I think that I am going to stick around in the XWF for a bit, ya know! I mean how bad can a lumberjack match be, right? Plus the WWE.... They can make me all the offers they want... The fact is they couldn't handle. Mister. Russell Mania!

Bill: That's great, Russell! That's what I was hoping to hear! They don't know what their missing out on! So you'll be ready for Wednesday?

~Mister. Russell Mania~: .............Yeah. I'll be there.

Bill: Alright! RussellMania's runnin' wild BAYBUH

~Mister. Russell Mania~: Yeah....... bye Bill!

Russell hangs up the phone and smashes it into the wall as the scene fades to black.

Scene #6: ------- The Flight Home.

After never returning to the hotel room Cameron and Naomi has traveled to the WWE headquarters and discovered the news about what had happened between Russell and the WWE COO; Triple H! They quickly rushed to the Stanford Hospital where they found Russell limping, hunched over in pain leaving the hospital lobby!

Cameron: Ohhhh baby! What happened?

~Mister. Russell Mania~: The WWE are full of immature, sick, wild animals! I agreed to return to the XWF after they totally called me up and begged me to come back! Offering me the largest sign on contract in XWF history!

Naomi: Oh wow! Baby! How much is that?

~Mister. Russell Mania~: $32,000.00/per year... No one makes more then that! No one! Anyway, it is time to get back to California! I am not driving back either! We are ditching the car and taking a plane! Lets get the fuck home!!!

-----4 hours later------

Russell, Cameron and Naomi arrive at the airport and Russell could not be more "moody". He walks up to an old man and shoves him down to the floor making it look like an accident! He storms up to the ticket desk.

~Mister. Russell Mania~: I need THREE FIRST CLASS TICKETS BACK TO CALIFORNIA! Right now!

Attendant: Ok, name?

~Mister. Russell Mania~: WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH CONNECTICUT! WHY DON'T ANY OF YOU KNOW ME! MY NAME IS MISTER.......RUSSELL,,,,,,MANIA........................MISTER.......RUSSELL......MAY-NEE-AAAAAAA! It is literally the most distinctive name in pro-wrestling! LITERALLY! FUCK!

Attendant: Sir, I'm going to have to ask you to calm down of you will not be able to go on any flights!

~Mister. Russell Mania~: Why don't you shut the HELL UP! And give me MY THREE FIRST CLASS TICKETS!

Attendant: Okay! Sir! I am going to have to ask you to leave immediatly... Otherwise I am going to call security! You are obviously too intoxicated to be boarding a plane!

~Mister. Russell Mania~: Intoxicated? It is my GOD GIVEN RIGHT TO GET ON A PLANE! How dare you! It's because I'm white isn't it? I'm not Jewish..... I'm straight as an arrow! Whats not to like?

Security approaches the desk and two guards grab ahold of Mania and escort him out of the airport lobby! Cameron and Naomi follow behind worried about how they will get home now! The two security guards toss Mania out of the airport to the sidewalk outside and Cameron and Naomi rush out and help him to his feet, he dusts off and screams * FUCKIN FUCKERS! MOTHER FUCKING ASS ASSHOLES FUCKERS* ..... *AHHHHHHHHHHHHH FUCKINFUKAAAAAA*....... Then a black man smoking a joint walks up to Mania and the two ladies.



Black Man: Hey Homeboy! I saw whatthey did you you back there dawg! Thas' ignant! Not letting you fly home to take care ya biness' Thas whack cracka... Thas why I don't do biness wit dem crazy foo's no more ya know what i zayin? But Theres this other airline! They hook you up dawg!

~Mister. Russell Mania~: Thank you my brotha! Where do I find this plane?

The black man points at a Purple Plane off in the distance *iss' ryte ova dere, dawg!*



Russell Mania smiles gleefully when he sees the Party Plane off in the distance. *Whats the airline?* he asks the black man. *It's called the Soul Plane, baby* he responds, Mania extends his hand and the black man shakes it.

~Mister. Russell Mania~: Thank you kind negro, I will tell other white people about your kindness when I return home!

Black Man: Dat wud be greatly PRESHIATED, dawg!

Alright! Mania turns around and looks at Cameron & Naomi and the three jump up and down in happiness! *I don't know how I can ever repa....* When Russell turns around the Black Man had disappeared and the three look at each other.

Cameron: Oh my god!

Naomi: Where'd he go???

~Mister. Russell Mania~: He's off helping some other jive soul in need..... My Guardian Negro... and I didn't even catch his name....We shall Meet again good sir! We shall meet again!

Scene #7: Flyin’ High

----------------5 Hours Later-----------------

We see Russell Mania, Cameron and Naomi sitting on the plane passing a huge joint around the plane! Suddenly the feature presentation begins to play.

Passengers, please sit back in your seat! Buckle up! Because we flyin’ HIGH tonight! Ha Ha! Tonight you take a puff, take another puff and then pass that mafucka along! Now it’s time for your feature presentation... It’s the dope shit out there!....... Wit Ma Boy Ma Nigga! Tommy Hanks!



---------2.2 Hours Later-------------

Forest Gump ends and the crowd all applauds it with a standing ovation a unanimous of *Run, Forest, Run* broke out throughout the plane.... In what was a truly beautiful moment!

That was some dope ass shit mafucka!!!!! We still gots 1 hour left on our flight so smoke some more b-a-a-a-a-alunts! And watch this shi......




------------1.2 hours later---------

The plane has landed and a very high Russell Mania is assisted out of the plane by half dressed Cameron & Naomi! Russell Mania walks through the airport, racing towards the doors! He gets out and looks around his hometown of the California Valley! Happy to be home!

~Mister. Russell Mania~: That was a Wild Ride!

Scene #8:Home Sweet Home, Baybuh!

We are backstage at an XWF event and we see several crew members getting everything prepared for the next edition of XWF television! We see Bill with talent relations patiently waiting at the arena door. After several minutes of waiting around the door an XWF talent approaches him, *Hey, Bill! What are you standing around here for?* Bill looks at him and replies, *I’m waiting for Russell... He is suppose to go on tonight and address the Gauntlet Match on Warfare but he’s running late*...

*BANG* the door flies open! Smashing the young wrestler to in his face, knocking him to the floor and an obviously bruised and beaten Mister. Russell Mania comes barreling through the door with Cameron & Naomi, not acknowledging the talent that he had injured or Bill! Shocked at what had just happened Bill runs behind Russell.

Bill: Russell, I was worried you weren't going to make it! How are you doing?

~Mister. Russell Mania~: How does it look like i’m doing, Bill? I thought it was fairly FUCKING obvious that I am not doing well! When am I on?

Bill: In 3 minutes! What the hell happened to your face?

Russell grabs Bill by the collar of his shirt and shoves him against a wall.

~Mister. Russell Mania~: I feel and hit my eye on a door-knob, BILL! Now if you don’t mind I need to go out there and address this “Gauntlet Match”........... I don’t want to hear another word from you tonight and if I do then you will join Brodus Clay & Tensai in collecting your workers compensation!

Mania tosses Bill to the floor and kicks him in the head, leaving him knocked out! Several people run up to protect Bill from further beating! Russell stares down and smiles for the first time since entering the building.... Cameron and Naomi both hook on to his arms.

~Mister. Russell Mania~: The Party’s Here.........

Mania smiles at both Cameron and Naomi and all three share in a laugh before turning around and making their way towards the enterance.

-------1 Minute Later-------

XWF cameras are rolling live and we see Jerry “The King” Lawler sitting ringside with Michael Cole talking about the match that had just taken place.



Jerry “King” Lawler: Wow! That might have been one of the best matches in the history of the XWF!

Michael Cole: Oh no doubt about it, King! But on a more serious note we just found out that during our last match there was a backstage altercation between one of our workers in talent relations, Mr. Bill Dangles! Now Bill is not very well known to you but he is probably the nicest guy you’ll ever meet, just doing his job trying to discuss a few things with Russell Mania....And he was just viciously attacked by Russell Mania for seemingly no apparent reason.... We are told that Mania aggressively shoved Bill down to the floor and kicked him in the skull! This was not a part of our scheduled broadcast this evening but we will keep you updated on this situation as it progress’. King, you have been a victim of Russell Mania’s unprovoked attacks before! Of course on the night of Mr. Mania’s debut several weeks ago you were...much like Bill Dangles.... Just doing your job! And Mania attempted to end your career! Of course you will get your chance for redemption at “RussellMania 1” on August 11 from Ceasers Palace in Las Vegas! When you face Russell Mania in a No-Holds Barred Street Fight! After seeing what just happened, how do you feel?

Jerry “King” Lawler: To be quite honest with you Michael ..... I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t afraid! I have been in that ring with a lot of men! Everyone from Cheif Jay Strongbow to Bret “Hitman” Hart to Santino Marella! But all of those men... As good as they are... Were all at least somewhat predictable! I have been in there with Russell Mania before and he is just a viscious, wild, evil animal in that ring! With that being said however...... A great man once said that “A Man Is At His Toughest When He Is Afraid” and I am confident that at RussellMania I am going to shut that jackass’ big mouth once and for all!

Suddenly the sound of “” by Heatwave begins to play throughout the arena and the fans all rise to their feet and begin to boos and give the “thumbs down” as Cameron & Naomi make their way out on to the stage, smiling and dancing they stand at the top of the ramp as Mister. Russell Mania steps through the curtains and makes his way to the very top of the ramp, Cameron and Naomi put their arms around Russell and the three makes their way down the stage.... Various profanities can be heard from the crowd directed at both Russell and “The RussellManiacs” They finally reach the ring and the girls hop up onto the apron and seductively step through the ropes and Mania quickly slides under the bottom rope into the ring. This is not the Russell Mania the crowd was used to seeing, unlike the beautiful Cameron & Naomi... Mr. Mania was obviously NOT in a very good mood! Mania walks over to the ring announcer who passes him the microphone extends his hand for a handshake and suddenly uses the ring announcers hand to pull him into a devastating “Russell Mania Moment”!!!!!!!

The sound of “Grooveline” immediately stops playing as Mania looks down at the man he just laid out! Instinctively the crowd begins to chant “asshole” as Russell stares around smiling at them! Mania then slowly bends over and picks up the microphone that had fallen to the floor.

~Mister. Russell Mania~: In case you couldn't tell.... In case you are BLINDED by the OBVIOUS! I am NOT feeling very happy right now! I started in this business back when most of this roster was still in diapers! And throughout my ENTIRE career I have remained ONE MAN. “Mister. Russell Mania”... Yeah I was asked to change who I was! But I am not a sell out! I am a man! I am the ALPHA-MALE of the X-Treme Wrestling Federation! I Am The Rated X SuperStar! Baybuh! I am “The Showcase Of An Immortal”, “The Grandest Man Of Em’ All”..... And because of that! Because of WHO I AM! I have never been given a fair shot! And I hear about this...this X-Treme Wrestling Federation! A place where I can bring RUSSELL MANIA onto a WORLDWIDE stage!

I had such I hopes, ya know?....... I thought my debut would be against John Madison! I mean... Maybe that was just me hoping for an easy night! Maybe that was just me hoping for a quick win.... Maybe that was just me wanting to take my place at the top of the XWF throne..... Regardless as to “Why I wanted the match?”.... It doesn't make a difference because APPARENTLY the corporate YES-MEN! That run the XWF have BIGGER plans for Russell Mania.... Because get this! They booked me in a GAUNTLET MATCH! A GOD DAMN GAUNTLET MATCH????? That’s my GRAND DEBUT! Well congratulations X......W........F..... You dropped the ball in record time! That was such a bad fumble I thought I was watching the XFL! A Gauntlet Match! Once again....MISTER. Russell Mania is being thrown in stupid multi-person GIMMICK matches!

And the worst part is... They didn't even book me with a SINGLE talent that's worth my time! Not a single GOD DAMN one! I have potentially SEVEN different opponents out of NINE competitors! And I mean.... Honestly.... Am I going to get paid SEVEN times as much that night? NO! Quite honestly... The match should be cancelled, let me beat up on the “Guy Frogger” or whatever the hell his name is, go down on Christine Nash for a few minutes and just give me the #1 Contender spot! Hell! Give me the damn X-Treme Title! I’m just going to beat the hell out of Stevie Tyler and take it ANYWAY!..... Tony Santos losing that title is the best thing that could have ever happened to him because now I don’t have to BURY his over-rated ass!

I mean look at the list of people in this match...... Ricky Desmond...Andrew Morrison! Members of “The Connection”.... Ohhhhhhhhh.....ahhhhhhhhhhhh.........ohhhhhh... Yeah real scary you guys are! Every time a group of sackless jackbags decide they want to team up and gang bang unsuspecting people it’s bad news... Yeah you guys are really tough!.... I am a lot of things! But the one thing I pride myself on the most is my AGGRESSIVE MANLINESS! I have the testicular fortitude of a HORNY LION and I do not need eight of my friends to help me out of every situation! Are you both good wrestlers? Yeah! Your both GREAT wrestlers! But I have socks that are more entertaining!

Quite frankly.....Ricky Desmond! Within the “Connection” I think you are the “Weakest Link” and honestly since I am entering at #4..... I don’t even expect to be in the same ring as you! But Andrew Morrison! It’s just gonna happen... You and I will meet in that ring on Wednesday Night.... And after your done making your goofy “Halloween” entrance, after your done trying to look “tough”..... Why don’t you just lay down and let me cover you! I don’t want to hurt you! I want to let you off the hook easy! That was you can hurry up and get backstage, rub Desmond’s feet, console him, tell him you love him and that everything will be “okay”.......And just continue to do what you do best.... Be the BEST DAMN CHEERLEADER the “Connection” has ever seen!

“The Phantom” Jack Kronus.... My god! And you people can’t figure out what’s wrong with wrestling today? Really?......Really?..... Any grown man who can fit into a pair teenage girl panties shouldn't even be in the XWF let alone a match with me! He may as well go hope on the Rainbow Express with Dong & Schlong!!!! “The Phantom”.... “Phantoms” are suppose to be scary, mysterious, inexpiable... Of which you are NONE of the above! The only thing mysterious about you is where you come from! Who made you? Well Lance...I mean Bruce...sorry.... Jack! Yeah that’s it.... I just solved the only unsolved mystery in your life.... With the help of some of California’s finest I was able...through extensive DNA testing determine Jack Kronus’ biological parents..... *DRUM ROLL* Here they are......

The following image displays on the X-Tron!



Gross.... Anyway...Then theres “GUY TOADIE” The Frog man! Quite frankly..... Best of luck in your future endeavours.... I’m sure you’ll do a good “J.O.B” on Wednesday Night and hang in there KITTY!.... ADAM ROLLINS! BAHAHAHAHA! This guy thinks he can step into the ring with the likes of MISTER. Russell Mania! Perhaps before he tries that he should work on making people give a damn about what he is saying! The guys is dumb as a stick! When I was watching “Forest Gump” on the plane ride home I actually thought that Adam was in the starring role! He’ll probably FORGET that the match is even happening and just sit at home drooling over himself, slapping his chest and uncontrollably masturbating. When I think of Adam Rollins.... This is what comes to mind......

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And that ONE IMAGE SUMS UP ADAM ROLLINS! Salvator! I don’t know very much about you... And that’s all I need to know! Take a god damn picture of yourself and Mail it to me so I’d actually be able to figure out who the hell you are? Are you white? Are you Mexican? Who is Salvator? Salvator Sincere?



HOLY HECK! TOM BRANDI???? Nah. Theres no way your Tom Brandi!!! Tom Brandi knew how to take a photo of himself. Whos next? Ohhhh yeahhhh..... Salman Van Dam... Now I first heard about Salman in 2005 all I knew about Salman was that he was the son of Rob Van Dam! You see many years ago when high on DOPE! Mr. Pay-Per-View decided to go for a walk on the beach.... Laying on the beach he found a large salmon that had washed ashore..... He picked up that salmon and was going to assist it back to the water... But something magical happened.... Rob Van Dam fell in love with that fish and from their love spawned hundreds of little eggs containing little half salmon/half human creatures... Salman was the only one who turned to wrestling! For some unknown reason his father chose to stop having contact with the rest of his family... Meanwhile his hundreds of brothers and sisters went on to mostly die of dehydration, prostitution (not making very much money) and Wal-Mart Greeters...... Here is a photo of Salman in case any of you haven’t had the chance to see him....



Ha ha! What a group! And it gets better yet! Relative newcomber to the X-Treme Wrestling Federation.... PETER SWAMP.....POND?....RIVER....OCEAN? Ohhhhh..... Lake.... Peter Lake! Is a superstar worth keeping your eye on.... Don’t blink or you’ll mis his entire career... Even entering at #10 doesn’t make a difference... Don’t let this week on Warfare get you down though , Lake.... Because as much as you SUCK! There are so many people here that are even worse then you.... The very idea that Mr. Satellite can hold a championship in the XWF is a testament to the lack of depth in the talent department.... You’ll do GREAT!

Mania looks around at the booing audience and smiles! He motions for Cameron & Naomi to come closer to him and they obey. He places one arm around each lady and removes his glasses. Placing them in the front pocket of his disco jacket.... Cameron & Naomi begin to rub him all over his body and even begin kissing his neck and earlobes.....

And then theres Ms. Christine Nash.... A woman... in a mans world.... Christine.... I will keep it short and sweet... The probability of you and I being in that ring together at some point on Wednesday is 100%.... And it’s up to you what happens from there.... You can either try to be “Wonder Woman”.... In which case I will hurt you, I will slap you around and I will have my way with you over and over again wether you like it or NOT! ORRRRRRRR... You can do what your good at.... Lay down at my feet and just TAKE IT! One way or the other Christine....I’m going to have my way with you.... You just get to choose...Bruises....or no Bruises....

And then Christine... After all is said and done... After I plough through you and everyone that follows... Cameron...Naomi and myself were thinking maybe we could change our.... “Triple Threats” into “Fatal 4-Ways” ha ha. And after were done you can...Make me a sandwich! Haha!.... Ya know what I love about you though Christine Nash?.... Let me show you....

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WOAW HAYOOOOOOO! I can’t wait to get my hands all over that! Yum! Cameron, Naomi and Christine.... The “RussellManiacs”.... I like the sounds of tha........

Suddenly Jerry “King” Lawler stands up at his announce table with a microphone

Jerry “King” Lawler: Okay Russell, enough is enough! You have gone too far....again!

~Mister. Russell Mania~: Well well... Jerry “The Kiiiing” Lawler! So nice of you to chime in and interrupt me! You know what, Jerry.... I was just waiting for your big mouth to start running, once again putting your nose in a place where it does NOT belong! I just don’t get you Jerry! You used to have the right idea! You used to “Get It!”.... And now look at you... A worthless... feeble... hallow shell of what you used to be.... Your not a King! Your a RELIC! Your a DINOSAUR! Why don’t you just hurry up and do all the viewers at home a favor and DIE! .......

You know what, Jerry??? It doesn’t matter because on August 11.... I am going to end your worthless career and slay the fallen King! And I will do so as the #1 Contender for the X-Treme Title!

Jerry smiles at Mania from the announce position and places his mic down on the table. He begins to walk towards the ring and the fans start to chant “Jerry, Jerry, Jerry” and Jerry slides in under the bottom rope! Cameron and Naomi step out of the ring and Mania pounces on top of Lawler upon entering the ring! He begins to beat away at Lawler with bitch slaps to the back of the head, Mania stands up and begins to kick Lawler in the back not allowing Lawler to get to his feet.....Mania walks a few steps away from Lawler and raises his arms, taunting the crowd waiting for Lawler to get to his feet and when he does Mania nails him with a “!!! Mania looks at Cameron & Naomi outside of the ring and yells at the to get him two chairs!!!

Michael Cole: No Dammit! No! He’s a Hall Of Famer!

Cameron slides the first chair into the ring and Mania wraps it around Lawler right leg, Naomi is about to slide the other chair into Mania but suddenly MICHAEL COLE leaves the ringside area and grabs the chair from Naomi!!!! Michael holds the chair back while Cameron and Naomi begin to ask him what he thinks he’s doing.... Russell Mania sees what has happened and slides out of the ring and grabs Michael Cole from behind and tosses him and the chair into the ring. Mania quickly slides in after Cole who sits begging for Russell not to hurt him... Cole picks up the steel chair out of desperation and begins to swing it ferociously at Mania who looks at him smiling....... Suddenly from behind Jerry “King” Lawler has removed the chair and nails Mania from behind with a low-blow!!! Cole takes advantage of the opportunity and smashes the steel chair over Mania’s head, knocking him to the canvas!!! Lawler tosses both steel chairs out of the ring and gives a nod of approval to Michael Cole, he tells Cole to get out of the ring and he begins to makes his way up to the middle turnbuckle... He looks around at the crowd... Looks down at the knocked out Russell Mania and flies off nailing Mania with a Diving Fist Drop and the crowd goes nuts as Lawler gets to his feet and looks around at the audience before removing his straps!!! All of a sudden just as King was about to hit Mania with the Piledriver Cameron and Naomi slide into the ring and pull Mania’s carcass out of the ring and helps him walk backstage as the fans go wild chanting for Jerry “King” Lawler as the King’s music hits and the show fades to black.