October 27th, Philadelphia Pa. The day before Savage.

The air is crisp, refreshing, and comfortable. The mild temperature is perfect for today's festivities. TK, the imposing Universal Champion, decided to have a little fun of his own. While many people looked forward to the activity of handing out candy to children during a local Trunk or Treat (brought about during the COVID-19 era) event outside of Eastern State Penitentiary, TK had a different idea in mind.


These little shit stains aren’t going to know what hit them. I'm glad Jimmy isn't here to tell me this is a fucked up idea.


As he stood next to his brand new silver Maybach, a sinister grin formed on his face, and he wore a costume that looked more menacing than festive. His costume oozes an aura of darkness. It features a tattered, hooded cloak, concealing his identity in shadow until he allows you to see him. The focal point, under the tattered hood, is makeup that makes his eyes look sunken and hollow. The FX he's wearing on his mouth makes it look like a twisted, jagged-toothed grin. This look is completed with claw-like gloves and heavy combat boots, striking fear into the hearts of the children who encounter it. Not to mention, instead of the typical trunk filled with sweets and treats, TK had prepared a selection of out-of-the-ordinary items for the children.


Come on up, you mistakes, that your parents act like they love!


The first group of excited children arrived, their faces beaming with anticipation.


What are you supposed to be?

A princess.


A little girl says sheepishly.


You look like your parents bought that shit at the Goodwill.


They held out their bags, eagerly waiting for TK to drop something delicious into them. But TK, as you know, had different plans. He reached into a nearby bin and handed each child a random item.


Here you go, you little snot-nosed fucks.


TK says with a mischievous chuckle, handing out items that include dead spiders, garlic bulbs, empty beer cans, and already-used toothpaste tubes. The children's smiles fade into confusion as they stare at their "treats". The first group of kids, still trying to make sense of their unexpected loot, left TK's expensive car, their Halloween spirit damaged. TK couldn't help but laugh as they walked away disappointed.


Stupid fucking kids. Get a job, ya fucking termites!


More children approach his overly expensive car, unaware of TK's unconventional sense of humor. One by one, they received bizarre items instead of candy. Balloons filled with glitter and mold, rubber bouncy balls that can't bounce, and rotten egg jelly beans made their way into the trick-or-treat bags. The children's reactions ranged from bewilderment to complete disappointment. Their expressions were priceless, and TK reveled in his role as the "mean candy giver." Some children even complain to their parents.


Mom, this guy is giving us weird stuff and he's a big meanie!


When their mothers would say anything or look in TK’s direction. He would just wink at their mothers and they'd look disgusted and want to get away.


Don't worry about that guy, Honey. He's a creep!


Anytime TK overhears some of the moms, he'd retort back whether it was true or not.


Yeah, I'll creep right into those panties of yours. Look at that, Goddamn! You got a fat ass, ya know that? I can’t believe you dropped a fucking litter either. Shit, you can come over anytime!


News of TK's unique approach to Halloween candy spread throughout the event. Word had gotten out that the Universal Champion was handing out "trick" items instead of "treats." Curiosity and a sense of adventure drew more kids to his Maybach, despite his shitty reputation.


What the fuck is going on? Why are more of you coming? They should have given up by now!


A group of teenagers, dressed in elaborate costumes, arrived with a defiant air about themselves. TK greets them with a wicked smile and continues his Halloween ritual.


What’s going on guys? You're in for a Hell of a night, aren't ya? You know tomorrow, I, the Universal Champion, will be taking on Edward “Strongest Dipshit”. You should come by and check it out.


This time, he offered them fake tickets to Savage, booze, cigarettes, weed, and condoms. The teenagers loved this. However, TK knew the booze was O'Doul's, the condoms had holes poked in them, and the weed was bunk, but the cigarettes were one hundred percent real. BOB is coming out with their own cigarette soon and he wants them addicted.


One of the teenage boys becomes ecstatic as he's a devoted fan of XWF programming.


Oh, man it's so cool seeing you here! My parents tried to get us tickets but they were sold out! This is the luckiest day of my life!

Hell yeah, guys! Can't fucking wait to see you in the crowd!


TK's obnoxious smirk should've been a clear indicator for the young man, but he was too caught up in the moment and momentarily overlooked the fact that TK will always be a No Good Bastard. As the night came to an end, TK realized that Halloween was about more than just sweets and treats. His plan had been shattered as it seemed as though the holiday was a time for laughter, surprises, and the unexpected.


This is fucking bullshit you’re not supposed to like this shit!


The kids who had received TK’s irregular "gifts" would likely remember Halloween as one of the most unusual, and to some, the worst, but ultimately entertaining nights of their lives. Although he hadn't given out traditional candy, TK had given the children something even more valuable. A memorable Halloween experience filled with surprises and shared stories. It turned out that sometimes, a little mischief could be just as sweet as candy. None of this was his plan, yet here we are. TK, making a community stronger by doing what he does best, being a complete shitbag.