LIVE FROM THE EASTLINK CENTRE
CHARLOTTETOWN, PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND
LEVIATHAN
- vs -
SQUIGGLY
APHRIYA ADLER
- vs -
GINA VAN ZYL Submission Match1
"THE" JESSICA ANDERSON
- vs -
MAJOR JUNG
LORD RAAB
- vs -
JASON CASHE Last Man Standing!
HGH
- vs -
MASTERMIND
RUBY & LATINA SUBMISSION MACHINA
- vs - T.H.U.G.S.
JOHN BLACK & TOMMY WISH
OOC: ANARCHY RULES is 1 RP with a 1K WORD LIMIT unless stated otherwise. Tag Team matches require one collab RP per team rather than two separate ones.
Hard deadline for Anarchy will be WEDNESDAY, 12-07-2022 at 11:59pm board time. Good luck!
BOOOOOOOOOOO-OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!
Canada ain’t never seen no pyrotechnicals like THESE before, because Vinnie brought the American FIREWORKS into the Great White North!
Some canucks are seen ducking, confused, as the arena is lit up like… uh… Canada Day, I guess? They still have the Queen on their money so independence isn’t really a thing, you know?
ANYWAY!
Pow! Pop! Bang! Zoom!
Fireworks and flames and lasers are ALL OVER the place, and the CamBot drones even line up in midair in the shape of a moose to show respect to America’s Hat.
The CamBots swirl through the air after jerking all the tears from every fan in attendance with the touching display of love for the Canadian land. They find several patrons throughout the arena who have made their own signs for the show, presumably using Maple Syrup to glue them together:
FOUR TIME, EH?
FOUR TIME, EH??
FOUR TIME, EH???
FOUR TIME, EH????
150 MATCHES
149 TECHNICALS
I MADE AN EDWARD
SIGN BUT HE
CAN’T READ
APHRIYA ADLER
LIKED MY TWEET
The drones then whirr their way through the air and find the announcer’s desk at ringside, manned by XWF Owner and all-around swell guy “Loverboy” Vinnie Lane, as well as his favorite Anarchy Dynamic Duo, Bama T. and Sassafras the Chihuahua!
Vinnie Lane: “Ladies and germs, welcome once again to the show everyone waits very patiently for every two weeks… XWF ANARCHY!!! We’ve got a fun one for you tonight… a handful of debuts, a nasty grudge match, and an exciting return as Latina Submission Machina teams with the NEW Anarchy Champion Ruby in our main event!”
Bama: “You gotta love it Vinnie! Anarchy is always growing, always gaining new talent, and always settin’ the dang standard for pro wrestling on Thursdays… or maybe Friday or Saturday!”
Vinnie Lane: “Totally tubular, Bama! Let’s get started with a DOUBLE debut… Squiggly the Clown taking on Leviathan!”
Bama: “Why’s there gotta be so many wrestling clowns, Vinnie? I HATE clowns!”
LEVIATHAN
- vs -
SQUIGGLY
As the music plays, we go to the ring, where Leviathan has already been waiting for his opponent…
“Grease Paint and Monkey Brains" by White Zombie starts to play and we see the lights dim down. After the intro we see Squiggly come out from the back sporting a pig mask with clown makeup smeared over it. A large oversized tie rests over his ring attire as he approaches the ramp. He pulls a match from behind his ear and strikes it before lighting his tie. Firecrackers begin popping as Squiggly begins to tremble, almost seizure-like. The smoke clears as Squiggly continues shaking his head, twitching and shaking his arms as he heads towards the ring.
Suddenly from behind… IT’S CLETUS!!!
Cletus batters Squiggly to the ground with what appears to be a snow shovel! Canadian arenas just always have those laying around, apparently!
Cletus bludgeons Squiggly with the shovel until the handle snaps right off of the… uhhh… shovelly part of the shovel. Squiggly is left laying on his face on the ramp, blood trickling from his head.
Cletus then turns his attention back to the ring and charges down, still with the shovel handle in his grasp.
Cletus rolls into the ring as Leviathan squares up… but he has to duck when Cletus flings the handle at him…
MIDWESTERN KISS!!!
Cletus leaves Leviathan laying, and then he goes out of the ring and grabs a sign from a fan before getting back in the ring and holding it high above his head.
BOOK CLETUS
Cletus then leaves the scene as officials swarm the ring and check on Squiggly and Leviathan. Cletus’s music hits as he walks back up the ramp.
Bama: “You better book that boy next time, Vinnie!!”
Vinnie Lane: “You might be onto something, Bama…”
"Come in!"
Theo Pryce was suited up and sitting behind his office desk. He looked real professional and at least pretending to be busy as the XWF cameras cut on inside his Office Room. A knock comes again from the door.
THEO PRYCE: "I said come in! The door is open!"
For a third time, a knock follows but now it was a banging. Clearly someone hammerfisting the door. Theo startles as he hurries up from his chair and scurries to the door, ripping it open to find Jason Cashe with a crooked smile on his face.
JASON CASHE: "Heyya! I'm here for our meeting!"
Pushing past Theo as if he was holding the door open for him, Cashe enters the office space and immediately starts touching shit on Theo's desk. Closing the door, Theo returns to his chair behind the desk and snatches a stapler from Cashe.
THEO PRYCE: "Have a seat, let's talk.."
JASON CASHE: "Right, let's get this over with. I appreciate the opportunity but I understand the business side of it.."
THEO PRYCE: "What are you talking about?"
JASON CASHE: "Obviously I'm being released from my contract.. I get it, I need this slap to the face I suppose."
Theo shakes his head. He usually wasn't one to show up to Anarchy. Truthfully, you could probably assume he doesn't pay it much attention at all. Yet here he was showing up for business. What else could it be as far as Cashe was concerned?
THEO PRYCE: "Nobody is getting fired! Is that what you thought this was?"
His laughter filled the office but Cashe wasn't laughing with him. Interrupting the meeting, the office door opens and Josslynn comes into the room carrying a gasoline can. Cashe was quick to leap from his seat and meet her at the door. He was trying to hide what she had in her hands.
JASON CASHE : "No, no, no.. Not needed! Exnay on the Gasoline-ay.."
His attempt at secret language was poorly done. Theo, up from his desk, approaches the couple.
THEO PRYCE: "Really Jason? Gasoline?"
JASON CASHE: "Fine.. I'll admit it. Josslynn was gonna set you on fire if you fired me.. No worries though!"
Looking towards Josslynn who was giving Cashe a 'You liar' type of stare.
JASON CASHE: "It's okay! He isn't firing me! Put the gasoline down my love!"
Shoving the gas can into his chest, Josslynn scoffs and turns to leave the office.
JOSSLYNN SPENCER: "This was your idea!"
She shuts the door but it opens again as she pops back into the room. Tossing a bag of marshmallows at him, Cashe catches the bag.
JOSSLYNN SPENCER: "Having me buy marshmallows.. Here!"
Again she was gone. Cashe wasn't sure if she was mad because he lied on her or if she was wanting to see the flames rise. Opening the bag of marshmallows, Cashe pops one into his mouth before offering Theo one.
JASON CASHE: "Want one?"
Theo gives him a long stare and returns to his desk. Cashe takes a seat as well as they move past whatever that was.
THEO PRYCE: "What I wanted to meet for is an opportunity. I wonder if a change of scenery would be helpful?"
JASON CASHE: "As long as it's not Dallas, Australia or Greece. Those are my No Fly Zones.. Where are you thinking though?"
Sighing, Theo slides a contract across the desk. At the top of it in bold letters says 'Warfare'. Cashe smacks the rest of the marshmallow and swallows it as he looks back at Theo.
JASON CASHE: "Interesting.."
THEO PRYCE: "What do you think?"
Nodding and giving the idea a shrug.
JASON CASHE: "Love those wild weekends!"
Grabbing a pen, Theo passes it to Cashe. Signing this would effectively end Cashe's time on Anarchy.. For now.
APHRIYA ADLER
- vs -
GINA VAN ZYL Submission Match!
A shower of rainbow colored lights falls upon the stage just as "Bad Girl" by DAYA begins to play. Aphriya Adler then explodes from behind the curtain jumping and reaching out to the crowd, each side of the stage. Then it seems as though the rainbow lights escort down the ramp. Her energy is high and quite contagious as the crowd cheers for her. Aphriya tries to touch each fan's hand that are outstretched down the ramp. She seems to glide into the ring under the bottom rope seamlessly. She bounces to each side raising her hand to the crowd with a bright smile.
The music begins to fade and the gameface comes on. Removing her jacket then keeping herself loose in the corner awaiting the battle to begin.
Vinnie Lane: “Aphriya Adler, she’s one and oh here on Anarchy! Nice win against Jamaican Jimmy last time out, Bama!”
Bama: “I could beat Jimmy, Vinnie. This is her first REAL test on the brand. GVZ is no slouch you know! She took out Jess Anderson and then got a W over the Mansquatch Cletus!”
Vinnie Lane: “True story… but someone’s getting their first loss tonight!”
Ladies and Gentlemen by Salvia plays as Gina steps though the curtain, she smirks as she walks down the ramp. She stops halfway and raises her hands above her head before running the rest of the way to the ring. She leaps up onto the apron, then leaps over the top rope.
Vinnie Lane: “Gina is a heck of an athlete! I heard from Penelope that Gina has ‘all day all night’ endurance… and that’s coming from a LFL player!”
Bama: “You know who else is a two sport star? Aphriya Adler! The Doe is here to defend that win streak but it ain’t gonna be easy!”
DING! DING! DING!!!
Adler and GVZ paw at each other, measuring one another from a safe distance before locking up. The lockup turns out to be a misstep on Gina's part as Aphriya Adler slides her hands up into a clinch and buries a knee into Gina’s chin that buckles the South African standout.
Adler snaps an arm around GVZ’s head and whips her to the mat with a headlock takeover, burying her fist into Gina’s head as she holds her down on the canvas. GVZ kicks her way free but her hair shows just how much of a tussle she just pulled herself from.
Adler tries to keep her foot on the gas by running in with a low knee, but GVZ scouts it and ducks, then scoops Adler to the mat with a rollup!
…!
…!!
Adler with the strong kick out, but the official reminds both women that pinfalls don’t matter in this match either way!
Vinnie Lane: “These ladies are all fight today, Bama!”
Bama: “EVERY day, Vinnie! These ladies don’t know what quit means… which makes this submission match an interesting choice!”
Adler and GVZ square up again and GVZ looks for a boot to the gut but it gets caught… GVZ flips it into an enzuigiri!
Adler stumbles back and GVZ jumps onto the middle rope and turns back, trying for an aerial strike… but Adler connects with the Night Night superkick and absolutely STARCHES Gina! Van Zyl is on her feet staring at the ceiling and Adler takes advantage, dropping GVZ with the PINK STARS!
Van Zyl falls to her back and Adler goes in for the kill, grabbing her wrist and dropping back into a cross armbar! GVZ has to roll into it and stretch her legs out to the ropes, getting the toes of both feet onto the bottom rope to break the hold.
Adler quickly transitions, pulling Van Zyl away from the ropes to apply a crossface! Van Zyl screams but then she grabs a handful of Adler’s ear, twisting it hard and forcing Adler to release the hold. Adler stands up and walks in a circle, making sure her ear is still attached to her head.
GVZ hits a running bulldog from behind! Gina stays on Adler, not letting her even think about getting up before she jumps up and drives a knee drop into the back of Adler’s head!
Vinnie Lane: “GVZ has a chance here, what’s she got in her arsenal?!”
Bama: “She’s been hittin’ the books, Vinnie! Check it out, a camel clutch!”
Van Zyl staps over Adler’s back and yanks Adler’s head back into a camel clutch. She settles her weight onto the small of Adler’s back and really cranks it back, and Adler’s face is bright red with gritted teeth as she squirms and kicks.
Somehow, Adler is able to fight the pain long enough to grab onto GVZ’s foot, and she twists the ankle hard in an inhuman angle… Van Zyl has to let go of the clutch and slide off to the side… and she jams her thumbs into the eyes of Aphriya Adler!
The official pulls her off and chastises GVZ for the blatant underhanded tactic, but GVZ rolls her eyes and mounts Adler, dropping hard shots onto the head of her blinded opponent.
Adler turtles up and GVZ stands and yells out some aggression as the crowds react to her sportsmanship with boos.
Van Zyl sticks her tongue out at the crowd and grabs Adler by the feet, and starts moving for a figure four… but a nasty up-kick from Adler stuns her!
Adler is up as GVZ tries to make sure her nose is on straight… THE SUN HAS SET!!!
Adler leaps onto GVZ and pulls her to the mat, locked in a DEEP triangle choke… Van Zyl is stuck but trying to fight free!
Van Zyl plants her feet and starts to lift Adler off the mat…
No!
She falls back down and her knees go weak!
Gina Van Zyl has no choice but to weakly tap the leg of Aphiya Adler! The official calls for the bell!
DING! DING! DING!!!
Winner by Submission - Aphriya Adler
Vinnie Lane: “What a match, Bama! I thought GVZ was going to cheat her way into a win there, but Aphriya Adler has MOXIE!”
Bama: “That girl could choke out a bear with them thighs, did you see how tight that choke was???”
"THE" JESSICA ANDERSON
- vs -
MAJOR JUNG
I Wish by Cher Lloyd featuring TI hits and a buzz at best fills the arena while The Jessica Anderson appears. A few people, possibly from England, clap and cheer for her as she makes her way to the ring. She walks briskly up the ring steps before walking along the apron. She gives each boot two quick wipes along the ring apron before stepping through the ropes and inside. She marches to the other side of the ring and then raises a fist in the air with a war cry that doesn’t garner much of a response.
Vinnie Lane: “Ouch dudette! No love from the crowd here!”
Bama: “The Jessica Anderson may be an established wrestler, but she hasn’t put that to any use in the XWF!”
The Blueprint 2 by Jay-Z hits and Major Jung is already taking an effortless
stroll down the ramp. His head and upper body covered by a black zip up hoodie. He makes a vertical leap from the floor onto the front apron, grabbing the middle rope, and standing on the bottom rope, he raises a single fist into the air before vaulting into the ring with an impressive looking backflip. Showcasing his athleticism. He unzips his hoodie, showing off his incredibly shredded physique which his wrestling singlet snugs tighter than a gnats butthole.
Vinnie Lane: “Well here comes Major Jung, a recent newcomer to the XWF! I guess since Elijah Martin transferred to the Green Brand of Madness recently, his theme music was up for grabs! That SUCKS!”
Bama: “He’s already proven to be ready as he snatched the Freestyle Title basically the second he showed up!”
Vinnie Lane: “Can Jessica Anderson’s experience slow him down?”
Bama: “Only if it doesn’t slow her down first…”
Anderson slowly begins to circle Jung and he circles her right back. They lock up at last and Jung is quick to catch Anderson in a side headlock. She struggles and then grabs Jung by the hand and starts trying to pry at his fingers. Jung slowly starts to lose his grip and Anderson begins to get out of the headlock but then Jung catches her by surprise with a European uppercut. Anderson stumbles back and hits the ropes before coming back. Jung bear hugs her before hitting an excellent overhead belly to belly suplex that sends her across the ring.
Anderson hits the mat and rolls before struggling to get her bearings. She tries to get back to her feet but Jung runs over and hits another European uppercut to stun her followed by a snap suplex to put her right back down. Jung tries to transition into a triangle choke but Anderson manages to scramble over and grab the ropes before it gets locked in. They both get up and Anderson throws a back elbow but Jung counters it right into a Samoan drop. He hooks both legs for a quick cover.
1!
2!!
Kick out by Anderson!
Vinnie Lane: “Whoa that was almost it right there!”
Bama: “Major Jung coming out hot to start this one!”
Jung is back to his feet first and tries to fire up the crowd. He gets a louder response than Anderson while hyping up the live audience. He turns back and grabs Anderson, pulling her back to her feet. He hauls her up high with a stalling suplex. Anderson somehow counters and drops behind Jung. She shoves him hard from behind and sends him running into the ropes. As he bounces and comes back Anderson goes for a running shining wizard. Just before she can hit it though Jung catches her, spins and nails a nasty spine buster instead.
Vinnie Lane: “Holy Guacamole!”
Bama: “You can say that again!”
Vinnie Lane: “I’d rather not repeat myself duder.”
Bama: “Fair enough!”
Jung gets back to his feet while Anderson is laid out on the mat. He walks briskly to the corner and climbs to the top rope. Jung carefully aims and then leaps off with a beautiful moonsault, crashing down on top of Anderson. The fans pop for the high risk move while Jung pulls himself up and panders to the crowd for a moment. Anderson grabs the ropes with a shaky arm and slowly tries to get back up. Jung stalks her from behind until she makes it to her feet. Jung grabs hold of her and delivers the Letterman Cradle!
1!
2!!
3!!!
Winner by pinfall - Major Jung!
Vinnie Lane: “Wow what a great showing for Major Jung! Flawless victory!”
Bama: “I feel like Jessica Anderson may need to rethink her career path…”
Vinnie Lane: “I’m stoked to see where Major Jung can go from here!”
Bama: “Very promising looking young man.”
Major Jung stands on the middle turnbuckle and raises his hands in victory while the crowd shows him some appreciation. Jessica Anderson is still down in the ring. Suddenly, a buzz in the stands draws attention to a hooded figure hopping the guard rail and sliding into the ring. The hoody is ripped off and once again it is Marf! He waits like a bull about to rage. Major Jung hops down from the turnbuckle and turns around right into a powerful lariat from Marf that turns him inside out.
Vinnie Lane: “No! Not him again!”
Bama: “How and why does he keep doing this!?”
Vinnie Lane: “That dude is messed up in the head, no use trying to understand his due process…”
Marf stands over Jung before hauling him up high and then drilling him to the mat with a vicious powerbomb. Marf drops to the mat himself and rolls out to the floor. He reaches under the ring apron and pulls out a steel chair. Marf brings it back into the ring with him while Jung is desperately trying to use the ropes to pull himself up. Jung tries to stand up but Marf immediately brings the chair down over the top of his head with a sickening crack. Jung drops to the mat outcold while Marf stares blankly at him.
Jessica Anderson is finally stirring but no sooner is she on her hands and knees, Marf spots her. He slowly walks over with the chair and raises it high over his head to a chorus of boos. Marf brings the chair down swiftly across the back of Anderson. He smashes the steel chair across her body several more times before turning back to Jung and hitting his downed body several times. Marf tosses the battered chair to the mat and then walks over to the nearest camera while medics and trainers begin to run down to the ring.
You know who’s fault this is…
And with that, Marf exits the ring and heads back into the crowd while both Major Jung and Jessica Anderson are attended to. The crowd lets him have it vocally but he doesn’t care, a sick smirk on his face as he leaves.
Vinnie Lane: “I really need some new security protocols.”
Bama: “Did we even have proper ones to begin with?”
Vinnie Lane: “Uhh…moving on!”
The lights go out in the arena, as a voice speaks out to the crowd
LORD RAAB
- vs -
JASON CASHE Last Man Standing!
Vinnie Lane: "This one is bound to be a blast, Bama... these two have a LONG history!"
Bama: "Raab an' Cashe don't like each other one bit, Vinnie, but they get to beat the blue Hell outta each other here tonight to find out who's gonna be the last man standing!"
The hymn-like hum vibrates through the area before Lauren Hill soundfully brings in the chorus. Jason Cashe comes out from the back with Josslynn Spencer holding his hand. His eyes are covered by sunglasses. Looking around the arena at the live audience, his eyes stay hidden behind the shades. Taking a long drag off an air joint, Cashe howls up into the sky, a few fans howl with him. Josslynn gives him a 'good game' slap to the butt and they head down to the ring.
ANNOUNCER: From Houston, Tejas by way of Decatur, Georgia.. A truly Troubled One they call DiOGee.. Jaaaassoooon! CAAAASHE!!
Stopping as the aisle turns to ringside, Cashe drags a foot creating an imaginary line. This is the line where when passed, the talking stops. Giving Josslynn a kiss, she heads around the ring as Cashe steps into a jog, leaping up on the apron onto his left knee. He stands, ducking under the top rope to enter the ring. Taking off the sunglasses as he enters, he rushes across the ring and launches them deep into the crowd. Growling a roar to the live audience, showing he was ready to scrap.
Vinnie Lane: "Here's the biggest popcorn fan on Thursday Nights, Jason Cashe!"
Bama: "That looked like EXTRA buttery popcorn, too!"
Monster by Skillet plays over the sound system as Lord Raab comes out through the curtain wearing his green and black wrestling trousers with his nickname The Green Disease German Monster on the front of them with Monster Energy logos on the side of his trousers with black gloves on both of his hands and wears a black and green mask and ignores the fans as he goes up the stairs before going in-between the ropes and crouches down in the corner moving backwards and forwards, rubbing his hands and moving his neck around while looking at his opponent with anger in his eyes while waiting for the match to start.
Vinnie Lane: "Lord Raab looks like he is ready to risk life and limb to put Jason Cashe down... remember, he went RIGHT after Cashe in the battle royal a few weeks back!"
Bama: "Yup! This is a grudge match that's real heavy on the grudge!"
DING! DING! DING!!!
Raab and Cashe immediately charge the center of the ring, both mean eager to get the violence underway. Cashe opens up with a big right fist, but Raab catches it before grappling Cashe in close for a clinch. Cashe tries to push off, but the bigger man is able to keep him close. Raab hooks his arms around Cashe's torso and, as Cashe is struggling, Raab lifts up Jason's arms while ducking beneath them and taking his back. A quick change of positioning sees Raab clasping his hands together around Jason's waist while standing behind him. Cashe is trying to pull apart Raab's grip, but it doesn't seem to be working!
Vinnie Lane: "Raab is holding on tight here!"
Bama: "Jason needs to create some space so he can land a few of those haymakers!"
Raab goes to lift Jason up for the german suplex, but Jason stomps on Raab's foot and forces him to release the hold! Jason turns around and pimpslaps Raab with such incredible force that he's forced to bounce back against the ropes. Pleased by the sudden turning of the tides, Jason cracks a big smile to the camera in the middle of the ring. Unfortunately for him, that smile is interuptted by a huge Lord Raab clothesline! Both men slam to the mat!
Vinnie Lane: "HUGE CLOTHESLINE FROM LORD RAAB!"
Bama: "Dang Vinnie, he just about took Jason's pretty little head off with that one!"
Vinnie Lane: "That wouldn't be the first decapitation on Anarchy! Or maybe it would be....I lose track of all the terrible things I put these athletes through for the fan's enjoyment!"
The referee goes to count the men down, but they both recover back to their feet before any counting really needs to happen. Jason brushes some dirt off his shoulder while Raab meanmugs him: then the two men are right back to fighting in the center of the ring! Jason is lashing out with jabs and hooks galore, trying to box his way through the green disease german machine, the punches don't seem to do much as Raab just shrugs them off. Raab counters with a huge elbow to the forehead that busts Jason Cashe open, and sends him right down to the ground! The referee begins counting.
Vinnie Lane: "It's looking rough here for Cashe!"
Bama: "Lord Raab has been in complete control of the action so far!"
1
2
3
Cashe shakes his head from side to side as he touches the blood on his face. Lord Raab laughs as the ref continues the count.
Vinnie Lane: "Jason, you need to get to your feet!"
Bama: "He knows what he needs to do, Vinnie, but he might not want to! I know I wouldn't want to get back up after a blow like that!"
4
5
Jason Cashe starts pulling himself up to his feet, only to eat a big boot to the ribs! He's forced back down and starts holding his stomach, rolling around the mat in pain as the ref restarts the count.
Vinnie Lane: "Lord Raab is giving no quarter to Jason Cashe right now!"
Bama: "This one could get ugly!"
1
2
3
As Jason Cashe looks to be getting back to his feet, Lord Raab sneers and shoves the referee out of th way. The referee gives Raab a verbal warning but Raab doesn't listen to it. Instead, Raab approaches Cashe before grabbing him by the neck and raising him off his feet. Lord Raab then doublehand chokeslams Cashe back down to the mat before telling the referee to come make the count!
Vinnie Lane: "GEEZ LOUIS, JASON! You have to get some offense in here!"
Bama: "I think this match has officially gotten ugly!"
1
2
3
Vinnie Lane: "Cashe looks hurt, Raab!"
Bama: "A hurt dog won't hunt, or get up in time to break the count!"
4
5
Cashe pulls himself over to the ropes and, with their assistance, the blooding yet still ruggedly handsome Cashe breaks the referees count. Lord Raab stomps his feet into the ground before charging straight at the recovered Cashe, trying to clothesline him right over the top rope- but Cashe ducks under it, and flips Lord Raab himself over the top rope!
Vinnie Lane: "This could be the change of pace Jason needed!"
Bama: "He needs to keep up the pressure and turn things around! This could be his moment!"
Lord Raab looks around in confusion as he instinctively lands on the ring apron like a nimble, yet incredibly large and somehow green cat! Jason Cashe turns around and uppercuts Raab right in the jaw, forcing the man's body to collapse against the ropes near the turnbuckle. Getting some kind of sick idea, Cashe grins like a dog as he begins climbing the turnbuckle himself from inside the ring. Then, with a little bit of workish help, Lord Raab climbs up the turnbuckle from the outside as Cashe drags him to the top.
Vinnie Lane: "What does Jason have planned here?"
Bama: "Whatever it is, baby, it could backfire in a big way! Big moves come with big risks!"
With both men at the top of the turnbuckle the crowd waits in awe, and the referee shouts for the men to come down. Jason turns around and tells the referee that his plan is to do exactly that! Jason positions Lord Raab for a big suplex off the top rope, but before he can execute it Lord Raab begins hammering away at his ribcage! Jason Cashe yelps in pain as blow after unexpected blow come raining down on his midsection, cutting his momentum right in half.
Vinnie Lane: "You jinxed him, Baba!"
After about a half-dozen body punches Jason's stomach is looking severely bruised, like broken ribs level of bruised. Jason clutches his side with a grimace before Lord Raab simply pushes him down to the mat, where Cashe lands roughly on his back. Jason lays in front of the corner, entirely stretched out as he moans in pain.
Bama: "I did not! I'm just commentating! You're dead wrong for trying to pin the blame on me, Vinnie!"
Vinnie Lane: "And now it might be Raab's turn to mess around and find out!"
Lord Raab leaps off the top, clearly going for an elbow drop!
Jason Cashe rolls out of the way just in time!
Lord Raab's elbow slams into nothing but mat, and he immediately rolls around the ring while holding his elbow, screeching loudly in pain.
Bama: "Now who's jinxing who?!?!"
Jason Cashe climbs to his feet, but just barely, keeping one hand on his ribcage the entire time. He stumbles over to Lord Raab, who is still screeching about his definitely fractured elbow, before laying into him with rapid fire chest stomps that seem to take Lord Raab's breath away!
Bama: "Here comes Cashe with the money shots!"
Vinnie Lane: "I don't think that's what that means, Bama T!"
Lord Raab rolls over to try and escape the flurry of legs, but this gives Jason a great opportunity to stomp on his injured elbow, and he takes it with glee! As Jason continues to unload on Raab inside the ring, we see a murmur growing throughout the crowd as there appears to be a disturbance of some kind just a few seats behind the front row. All the fans are looking back, barely even paying attention to what's happening in the ring. The referee included!
Bama: "What's going on here? It looks like someone's getting into a fight in the front row...."
Vinnie Lane: "Somone's spilling beer and popcorn on everyone! Maybe I should call security in to remove the unruly fan..."
Bama: "Nah, Vinnie! Don't kill the party!"
Just as everyone else is distracted, Cashe hits a modified 'Mark of Jason' on Lord Raab by diving at his grounded opponent, hitting the big right elbow to Raab's temple, busting him wide open! Jason Cashe rolls over and stands to his feet with pride, both him and Raab now wearing matching crimson masks. Jason stands victoriously in the center of the ring as he waits for the referee to start counting......and waits for the referee to start counting.....and waits for the referee to start counting....until he realizes the referee isn't going to start counting!
BECAUSE CLETUS HAS CLIMBED UP TO THE RINGSIDE APRON!
Vinnie Lane: "It's the Appalachian Mansquatch! again"
Bama: "What's he doing here in the Anarchy Zone?!"
The referee is telling Cletus not to get involved, and that's when Jason has to grab the referee by the shoulders and direct him towards the down and out Lord Raab! The referee sees the man down and immediately starts the count, albeit at least ten seconds too late!
1
2
3
CLETUS walks around the edge of the ring, looking on with mysterious intent.
4
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6
7
8
Lord Raab pulls himself up to a standing position! And Jason Cashe is pissed about it! While Lord Raab tries to steady himself with the assistance of the ropes in the corner, Jason Cashe is completely tearing into the referee for that fucked up count! The referee is arguing back, making Jason even more angry!
Vinnie Lane: "I think Cashe got robbed here, but he has to focus on the match at hand."
Bama: "He just won the match at hand, but the ref messed it up! I'd be angry too"
Jason throws his hands up in frustration and looks like he's about to walk over to Lord Raab....but the referee tells Jason Cashe to watch himself, and that level of arrogance sends Jason straight to the moon! Cashe turns around and absolutely BITCHSMACKS the referee so hard that he probably won't even know what happened when he wakes up! The referee falls face first to the mat as Jason walks over to Raab.....who is now more or less recovered and waiting for him!
Vinnie Lane: "Jason, no!"
Raab kicks Jason in the stomach before hitting the Killerbuster! Cashe looks KO'd on the floor as a bloody Raab climbs back to his feet, gripping his elbow and looking around for the ref to make the count....but the only person he sees is CLETUS, who is now standing smack dab in the center of the ring!
Bama: "Now what's he doing?!"
CLETUS and the injured Raab jaw each other in the ring, but then CLETUS delivers one incredibly hard slap that forces Raab to literally do a 360 degree rotation, and then CLETUS follows up with a big pop-up powerbomb! Raab is laid out on the mat next to Cashe, both men beaten senseless!
Vinnie Lane: "CLETUS just laid Raab out!"
CLETUS walks over to the referee and slaps him awake before lifting him up and directing his attention to the scene of carnage. The referee looks at CLETUS with incredible suspicion, but because he didn't see anything he can't do anything! The referee tells CLETUS to leave, and CLETUS does so with a huge smile on his face. CLETUS steps through the ring ropes and hops off the apron before walking up the entrance ramp with a huge smile on his face as the ref starts counting the two men down.
1
2
3
4
5
6
Cashe and Raab both slowly start to stir, each man turning over to their stomachs and slowly inching towards the ropes.
7
8
Raab is to the ropes first, and he starts to lift himself up with them. Jason hits the ropes shortly after and struggles to rise.
9
Cashe continues the struggle to rise as he grips the ropes, hanging onto them for dear life as he sees stars in the sky. Raab, meanwhile, is almost up to his feet before the blood on his hands causes him to let go of the ropes, slipping back down to the mat!
10!!!
Cashe pushes himself off the ropes just as the referee makes the count, and Raab is still on the mat laying in a pool of his own blood! Raab tries to push himself to his feet once more, but his limbs give out and he's forced back down to his stomach! The referee calls for the bell as Jason Cashe stumbles over to him, raising his arm in victory!
Winner - Jason Cashe
Vinnie Lane: "What a crazy turn of events, but Cashe still comes out on top!"
Bama: "I don't think he knows how he won, but he will celebrate nonetheless!"
Jason celebrates in the ring as a confused Raab rolls around on the mat in pain. Jason raises his hand in victory before dropping to the mat and sliding out of the ring, walking up the ramp while holding his injured ribs.
"Don'cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me? Don'cha wish your girlfriend was a freak like me.. Don'cha!"
Jason Cashe is seen backstage as the cameras cut on in one of the locker rooms. His head down, he was still in his ring gear. Still fairly fresh from his Last Man Standing with Lord Raab. He was sitting on the edge of a folding chair, elbows on knees and head hanging. His song voice was cracking as sweat dripped from his forehead, it was clear he hadn't yet hit the showers after his match.
JASON CASHE: "Where the fuck is this dude?"
With the magic of pro wrestling backstage segments, the door to the locker room opens and in walks Bam Miller. Cashe sits up as the two lock eyes and Bam stops in the doorway. Moving into the room, he lets the door shut behind him. Neither taking their eyes off the other.
BAM MILLER: "Well look who it is, what the hell do you want?"
JASON CASHE: "Don't worry.. I'm not gonna doooo what everyone thinks I'm gonna do and just FLIP OUT!"
Going against his own words, Cashe springs up from his seat. Bam clenches his fists, ready to accept that this could turn into a fight at a moment's notice. Cashe smiles and holds up a comforting hand.
JASON CASHE: "I'm not here to fight. I'm here to make a request.."
BAM MILLER: "A request? Motherfucker, you want a FAVOR?!"
JASON CASHE: "Kind of but it's for your own benefit as well.."
Taking a step closer to Bam, the tension was rising fast. The door to the locker room opens as Charles Beckett steps in and freezes as he sees Cashe standing in the locker room. Turning to Bam then back to Cashe, Beckett wasn't sure what was going on.
BAM MILLER: "It's cool.. I'm good, give me a minute."
JASON CASHE: "Yeah, give us the room."
CHARLES BECKETT: "If you need me, I'll be just outside.."
Charles was informing Bam but his eyes were secured on Cashe as he backed out of the room and pulled the door shut. Cashe gave the situation a grin as Bam continued the conversation.
BAM MILLER: "So.. You were saying how this favor benefits me as well?"
JASON CASHE: "Bad Medicine. You won the match but your beef wasn't with who you pinned. As you can see, Theo isn't here. I sure as fuck don't see Pagey Pooh either. So that match didn't need to involve them but they have beef so it is what it is.."
BAM MILLER: "Your point?"
Snapping to Bam, close enough to know that Bam has had a few beers.
JASON CASHE: "You didn't beat me!"
Turning away, Cashe gives Bam his space but continues.
JASON CASHE: "All of this has been about you and I but you and I didn't end anything at Bad Medicine. So the request I have is that we do it again but leave the representation in the back."
BAM MILLER: "What's the setup? Where and when?"
JASON CASHE: "Through the grapevine, I heard about this event taking place. Sissy PD versus The World?"
BAM MILLER: "It's C-C-P-E but yeah, January 22nd."
Clapping once, Cashe nods at the date.
JASON CASHE: "Perfect! Yeah, I will gladly whoop your ass on a show to showcase Sissy PD. Get in touch with Winnie the Page and tell him to get the paperwork sent to Theo. You can pick the stipulation, consider it your home field advantage.."
BAM MILLER: "I don't need advantage but I do have a battlefield I want us to compete on… HELL.. IN… A…CELL!!!"
Again nodding, Cashe did so at a slower pace. Moving towards the door, he grabs the knob but doesn't open it. His back to Bam now, Cashe left himself open but knew Bam wasn't in need of a sneak attack. That's not what this was. This was two dogs wanting a prize in the fight.
JASON CASHE: "We will leave no doubt, no excuses."
BAM MILLER: "I expect nothing less.."
Pulling the door open, Cashe leaves into the hallway. Before the door can close, Charles Beckett enters the room in a hurry. He wanted to know what was going on.
HGH
- vs -
MASTERMIND
A figure is seen walking out from the back wearing a black hooded sweatshirt on. The hood was over his head so he couldn't be seen, and his head was looking down.
He stood in a stance. And as a white light appeared on his front, he unzipped his sweatshirt and showed the front of the t-shirt:
As it continued he turned around and took off his hooded sweatshirt and revealed the back of the t-shirt which read:
He turned back around and stood in a pose as the white light bathed on him to reveal: MASTERMIND
Vinnie Lane: “Good ole’ Mastermind! Glad to see the dude’s still trying his best out there in spite of everything. Career match number 150 for him, and you gotta imagine he’s hungrier than ever to walk out of here with a win!”
Bama: “You’re not wrong at all, baby, not wrong at all! But Mastermind’s on a bit of a downward slope as of late. He’s gotta work to break that mental block that’s gotta be forming in the back of his head before he can get the win tonight!”
Mastermind then smirks as he walks all the way to the ring, with the Misfits Manager Antony The Jerk, walking not far behind. Followed by Melanie 'Crayzee' Childs and Kris 'The Hammer' Von Bonn.
HGH’s music plays as he comes out from the back, wearing a deep scowl on his face. He stares at the fans booing and jeering at him for a while, before starting on the long walk to the ring.
Vinnie Lane: “And speaking of guys in a bit of a slump… looks like both of these guys are gonna have to break through that little mental barrier bit you went on about, Bama! HGH is a good dude in that ring, but both he and Mastermind have been taking some hard losses recently!”
Bama: “The difference, I think here, is that Mastermind’s experience will allow him to retain more control over his mind and emotions and come out with the win.”
Vinnie Lane: “Well, I guess we’ll see how true that is! Not sure if I disagree with those thoughts, though…”
HGH rolls into the ring, wasting no time in trying to get into Mastermind’s face and mouth off to the grizzled vet. Mastermind remains impassive, his eyes sinking right into HGH’s own. Referee Chaz Bobo forcefully separates the two, getting HGH into his own corner as he paces around back and forth.
With the matter settled, the referee goes to ring the bell.
DING! DING! DING!!!
HGH wastes no time in moving with a full head of steam, taking the fight to Mastermind in his corner! The much larger Mastermind manages to cover up his face with his arms, but in doing so, his lower body is left exposed! HGH sees this and takes advantage of it, landing a few harsh body shots right to Mastermind’s core that has him doubling over slightly. He goes to move his guard down-
SLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP!
Mastermind’s head just got placed on a swivel from that open-palmed slap! Interestingly enough though, it seems Mastermind’s hand isn’t gravitating to his cheek, but rather-
Bama: “Is Mastermind covering up his eye there?”
Vinnie Lane: “Looks like it! HGH pulled a fast one there and slipped an eye poke in while slapping Mastermind! Happened so fast poor Chaz didn’t even realize what happened!”
At ringside, Melanie Childs pipes up to try and draw Chaz’s attention to what just happened. Chaz raises an eyebrow, but before anything can come of it, HGH turns his gaze to Melanie and gets her to quiet down. But now as HGH turns around-
DROPKICK FROM MASTERMIND!
Vinnie Lane: “Always gets me going, seeing a dude as big as Mastermind pull off something like a dropkick! Totally not coming from a guy who’s five-foot-something there!”
Bama: “That’s a rather odd bit to blurt out-”
Vinnie Lane: “Look, dude!”
HGH attempts to quicken the pace once again by trying to force his way up to his feet, but as soon as he gets back up, Mastermind quickly BLASTS him with another acrobatic move - this time an enzuigiri! It does the job and then some with keeping HGH grounded, trying to recover his senses as Mastermind hops onto him, trying to score some quick grounded hits.
HGH manages to try rolling out of the way of a stomp that’s going straight towards his face, but Mastermind doesn’t grant him any sort of reprieve as instead he moves forward, kicking the grounded HGH in the gut! HGH sits up, heaving and gasping for air as Mastermind hits a back elbow right on the nose!
Vinnie Lane: “Aw, crud! That one hit hard! HGH should be counting himself lucky if his nose didn’t get broken from that shot!”
Bama: “He’s gonna need a bit more than luck if he wants to get back into this!”
HGH immediately starts rolling to the ropes to try and get some stability to latch onto. Mastermind quickly gives chase though as HGH grabs onto the bottom rope. He bends over to grab onto HGH, and HGH’s hand goes forward while seemingly trying to aim for a punch…
ANOTHER EYE POKE FROM HGH!
Mastermind staggers back, trying to keep blinking and get his vision back to normal while this buys HGH plenty of time. Chaz Bobo sees the eye poke this time and admonishes HGH as he gets onto his feet, but the youngster simply holds his hands up with that shit-eating grin, swearing up and down to Chaz that it was simply an accident.
Bama: “‘Accident,’ my behind…”
Vinnie Lane: “You said it, dude! I think we both underestimated just how crafty HGH can be in a situation like this. He’s really trying to take control here.”
HGH gets onto his feet with Mastermind still groggy. He immediately darts in, latching onto Mastermind’s right arm and wrenches it as tight as possible. He’s practically trying to yank the damn arm off! Mastermind grits his teeth, sucking in air while trying for a right hand to floor HGH. HGH ducks it though, and instead - ARM DRAG TO MASTERMIND!
Mastermind hits the mat hard, now in a seated position as HGH still has control of the arm and shoulder. With a confident smile at hand, HGH takes a now free arm, bringing his elbow and wrenching it against Mastermind’s jaw. With HGH still yanking on the arm, this now places additional stress on the shoulder and tendons, straining the muscles as Mastermind groans in agony!
Bama: “This might just be a rest hold, but credit where credit’s due - HGH has that locked in tight! That damage to the arm is going to be doing a lot here!”
Vinnie Lane: “It’s honestly really smart. We harp on him a lot, but Mastermind is kinda a genius in that ring, y’know? Not many guys who can control the ebb and flow of a match quite like he can.”
HGH takes his elbow off of Mastermind’s jaw, instead delivering sharp elbow after sharp elbow to the shoulder! The Master of Minds is feeling like he’s in quite a predicament right now, trying to use his feet to shuffle his way over to the ropes. HGH sees it coming, though, trying to plant his own weight down and make the journey as difficult as possible.
Vinnie Lane: “So MM’s been trying to do that, and keep things kinda slow so he can work it over. HGH sees it all happening though, and he accepts it and then some with a bit of low-brow fighting. Not like I agree with it, but it is what it is. And he keeps the slower pace going so he can target the arm and set up for the Double Dose. Just like that, now, HGH just used MM’s strategy against him!”
Bama: “That’s… quite the analysis, Vin. Hard to disagree when you get down into the nitty-gritty and analytics of the ring there. We’ll see if HGH can keep this up, though…”
Similarly, Mastermind seems to be coming to the same conclusion as he’s trapped underneath the rest hold. He grits his teeth, trying to squirm his way out of harm. HGH still manages to keep the upper hand though, cutting off the attempt with a knee to the back. That manages to get Mastermind juuuuuust close enough though for Melanie Childs to grab the rope and bring it forward enough for Mastermind to hook onto it with his foot!
Vinnie Lane: “Oooh! Smart work from Mastermind to bring himself forward enough and make that work! See, that’s the problem with fighting MM, you’re rarely just fighting him.”
Bama: “This entire match feels like it’s a game of chess at this rate.”
Vinnie Lane: “That’s the beauty of combat in the squared circle, Bama!”
Chaz Bobo once again gets involved, mouthing off to the Misfits at ringside and threatening to throw them out and into the back. Melanie looks almost incensed at the threat and does everything in her power to not say something she’ll regret for the sake of her leader, instead grabbing onto her hair and repeatedly muttering something under her breath as she paces back and forth at ringside.
With Melanie out of the way for the time being, Chaz turns his attention back to HGH, informing him that there is, in fact, a rope break and he needs to release the hold as soon as possible. HGH glowers at him, keeping the hold locked on as he starts to count out HGH.
ONE!
TWO!
THREE!
FOUR!
FI- HGH LETS GO!
Bama: “Close call there! HGH is so focused on inflicting damage right now to secure the win later that he needs to make sure he doesn’t go overboard.”
Vinnie Lane: “Hey, you said it, not me! But yeah - HGH needs to try and keep his head on straight. He got this far, he just needs to seal the deal.”
Mastermind immediately goes for the ropes just as HGH did earlier, using them as his lifeline. HGH stalks Mastermind like he’s a wounded animal, the sinister glower in his eyes telling everyone watching through the camera that he smells the blood in the water. Backing up a fair ways, it looks like HGH is trying to set up for the end! He rolls in, looking for the Injection Shot-
BUT MASTERMIND SHOVES HIM OFF AS HGH LEAPS INTO THE AIR! HE LANDS RIGHT ON HIS ASS AND YELPS AS HE DOES SO!
Vinnie Lane: “Here we go! Here’s that tried and true Sleeper Hold coming into effect! Is HGH gonna be the latest victim of the Mind Sleeper?”
Bama: “HGH has got to move fast, otherwise he might well be!”
HGH tries punching the weakened arm of Mastermind in a desperate attempt to break the grip. The longer he stays locked in this tight hold, the greater the odds are that he’ll be coming up on the receiving end of a loss. Mastermind doesn’t let this faze him though, blocking out the pain for the time being and instead cinching the hold in tighter.
HGH changes tactics quickly, realizing that’s not going to work out, getting onto a knee and trying to get back up onto two feet. Mastermind quickly applies more of his weight onto HGH, trying to prevent him from standing up. Chaz Bobo slides into position, asking HGH if he wants to quit, but the youngster responds by wagging a finger no at the ref! He’s still in this, but for how long?!
With the fans chanting towards him in unison, telling him to tap out, HGH hangs in there and barely manages to get onto two feet! His strength is starting to leave his body, so he uses all the energy in his body right now for one desperate push, going against every ounce of Mastermind’s core strength and reaaaaaaaaching for the ropes-
BREAK!
Vinnie Lane: “WOW! Amazing body strength from HGH! He really hung in there!”
Bama: “HGH really dodged a bull- WOAH I SPOKE TOO SOON!”
MASTERMIND IMMEDIATELY BREAKS THE HOLD IN ORDER TO HIT HGH WITH A GERMAN SUUUUUUUUUUPLEX!
Bama: “HGH JUST GOT DROPPED RIGHT ONTO HIS HEAD THERE!”
Vinnie Lane: “Oh, now that’s really gonna be something he feels in the morning tomorrow…”
HGH is stunned and then some from the impact! It’s a race between him and Mastermind to see who can recover and get up the fastest, as lifting HGH up the way he did really seems to have done a number on the Master of Minds’ arm! The two take a long moment, trying to find their footing as they stand across from one another…
MASTERMIND GOES FOR A PUNCH!
BUT IT’S CAUGHT!
HGH WRENCHES THE ARM, GOING IN TIGHT!
HE’S GOT HIS SIGHTS SET ON HITTING THE DOUBLE DOSE!
HE GOES TO DROP HIM FOR THE HAMMERLOCK DDT!
…
BUT MASTERMIND STOMPS ON HGH’S FOOT IN ORDER TO WIGGLE OUT JUST IN TIME! MASTERMIND FREES HIMSELF AS HGH’S FACE PALES IN REALIZATION!
MASTERMIND GRABS HGH’S LEGS FROM UNDER HIM AND HAS HIM ON HIS BACK
AND
WRENCHES
HIM
INTO
A
BOOOOOOOOOOOSTON CRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAB!!!!!
Bama: “MIND CONTROLLER! MIND CONTROLLER! MASTERMIND’S GOT IT LOCKED IN TIGHT!”
Vinnie Lane: “Not a lot of places for HGH to go…!”
HGH crawls and scratches on the canvas, trying to bring himself to the ropes! But there’s too much distance! Mastermind arches back on the hold with everything he’s got, trying to take it upon himself to apply as much pressure as possible!
HGH reaches out… he reaches out as far as he can… but the ropes just aren’t close enough!
HGH TAPS OUT TO THE MIND CONTROLLER!
Winner by Submission - Mastermind
Vinnie Lane: “What a win for Mastermined! He fought off the challenge from a solid up and coming performer ”
Bama: “Match number 150 was a W for the Master of Minds! You never know when the old dogs are gonna remind a pup who their daddy is!”
RUBY & LATINA SUBMISSION MACHINA
- vs - T.H.U.G.S.
JOHN BLACK & TOMMY WISH
When the Tron comes to life with the words THUGS in red font, and smoke comes out of the stage and the camera see's Tommy coming out first trash talking to the camera, then JB follows behind as he raises his fist in the air as they walk down to the ring. At the ramp area, Tommy and JB smack talk some people, and they both climb to the ring and enter it and bask in the mixed reactions as their theme cuts off.
Vinnie Lane: “The THUGS have been staples of Anarchy since day one, Bama... they were here before you were!”
Bama: “Yeah well they ain't any closer to gold are they?”
As soon as LSM's theme music hits the speakers the lights go dim as the crowd starts cheering for their favorita luchadora. As the bass bumps through the arena the crowd chants along to the slightly modified music. A spectacle of green and red pyrotechnics shoot up twenty five feet in the air from their base on the entrance platform. A complimentary arrangement of pyro shoots up through the four turnbuckles of the ring.
Oh!
Oh!
Oh!
Oh!
Oh!
A green, a red, and a white spotlight shine down from the rafters, randomly perusing through the rambunctious crowd as they await their beloved Latinx hero. After a few seconds all three of the spotlights are directed towards the entrance tunnel.
Who's this?
Latina Submission Machina pops out onto the illuminated entrance ramp alongside an additional burst of multicolor fireworks. The crowd pops hard for her.
MACH-IN-A! MACH-IN-A!
Announcer: Weighing 145 pounds and standing at 5 foot seven inches tall, fighting out of Ciudad Juárez... she is LATINA SUBMISSION MACHINA!
The luchadora bounces around just outside the tunnel and flips her hair to the side before she starts walking down the ramp amidst thunderous applause. The multicolored spotlights follow LSM every step of the way. The champion briefly pauses to give out a few high fives and to take a few courtesy photos with the front-row fans.
When she finally hits the squared circle Latina Submission Machina slides beneath the bottom rope and into the ring. Moments later Latina Submission Machina quickly breaks away and starts running the ropes of the ring, testing out the squared circle and getting a feel for it's qualities. Once she's content with it's fitness, the luchadora grabs a hold of the ropes and comes to a controlled halt. She turns to the referee and tells them she's ready to go. The luchadora heads to the corner as instructed and begins reveling in the applause of her fans as she blows many kisses out to the crowd.
Vinnie Lane: “And here's the returning LSM... that's my quarterback, Bama!”
Bama: “I hope she can throw better than she can apply makeup! She missed half her dang face!”
An opening in the roof of the arena appears as the music plays, and a few moments later...
ANARCHY CHAMPION RUBY BUNGEE JUMPS INTO THE ARENA!!!
Who knows how high up she was, but she bounces a couple times before dangling there, swinging over the ring and flailing her arms around excitedly with a big grin on her face.
As the official helps her get the cord contraption off of her ankles, Rubes holds the Anarchy Title over her head and runs around the ring in circles before sliding on her knees across the length of the whole ring!
The champ heads to her corner with a HARD high five to LSM and then they talk shop while they wait.
Vinnie Lane: “No one makes an entrance quite like the Banana-Lime Blur!”
Bama: “I ain't strappin' no bungee cord to me or my puppydog, Vinnie!”
As things look to be getting started, there’s a brief moment of strategy being discussed by both sides. Ruby and LSM seem to mainly be watching the THUGS and figuring out what they intend to do in order to start off with. Tommy Wish takes it upon himself to start the match off for them. Upon seeing this, LSM immediately beelines it into the ring in order to start the match off as well.
Vinnie Lane: “Hooooh… no love lost still between LSM and Tommy Wish. Hard to blame her though considering she’s right across the ring from her kidnapper! Anybody would be chomping at the bit to go at ‘em!”
Bama: “Vin, for once, I gotta disagree, baby! I think this is just more drama being stirred up by LSM like what’s been going on elsewhere as of late. If she hated her kidnapper so much, then why would she willingly draft him to her War Games team?”
Vinnie Lane: “Some people really wanna get the win on the big stage, dude! It kinda worked out for LSM, didn’t it? She was a survivor going into the main event!”
Bama: “And she ditched her morals in the process of doing so. She needs to savetht drama for her mama!
”
DING! DING! DING!!!
A fast and furious start ensues as LSM quickly goes on the warpath in an attempt to get Tommy Wish into the clinch! Wish knows exactly what LSM is capable of, and proceeds to start circling around the ring in order to avoid her like the plague!
LSM is clearly irritated by this display, proceeding to start speeding up significantly in an attempt to close the distance between them. Tommy backpedals now, but he soon finds himself against the ropes! He goes to sidestep-
MUAY THAI CLINCH! LSM WASTES NO TIME AS SHE’S GOT TOMMY RIGHT WHERE SHE WANTS HIM! A heavy knee strike goes right into Tommy’s ribcage, softening him up! The fans - and John Black on the apron - wince in unison as Tommy gets hammered! And another knee comes down! And another!
Vinnie Lane: “Bit of extra aggression here from LSM behind those clinch strikes! I like it!”
Tommy Wish tries to push off in order to create some separation, but it’s not enough in order to stop the freight train that is LSM! JUDO HIP TOSS PLANTS TOMMY WISH RIGHT ON HIS BACK AS THE FANS POP!
LSM hops on top of Tommy Wish, again wasting zero time. She gets herself into top side control, keeping a tight hold on him and trying to knock him around with a few grounded strikes. It’s all just set up though as she tries to look for an early finish, trying to get into position for an Omoplata-!
But Tommy uses his size and strength to turn LSM around, rolling around with her! The movement takes LSM by surprise, allowing Tommy to bring a leg over and have himself now in FULL MOUNT!
LSM’s face pales in recognition of what’s going on, and a sinister grin makes its way onto Tommy’s face. She quickly starts jerking around, scratching and clawing and trying every trick in the book in order to get off beneath him! BUT A HEAVY HAMMERFIST FROM TOMMY SHUTS THAT DOWN AND KNOCKS LSM LOOPY!
Vinnie Lane: “Wuh-oh. Look at LSM right about now! It’s like she’s a cornered animal! Tommy Wish knows exactly what he’s doing, and he’s reveling in it!”
Bama: “LSM is going too sloppy and making mistakes right about now. She needs to buckle in and focus on getting out of here, first and foremost.”
Now, it's a moment of dire straits for LSM. She's still trying to adjust her weight in an attempt to break out from beneath Tommy's grasp, but a stiff elbow cuts that off as well. A few strong strikes connect cleanly with LSM's head, and it's enough for audience members to start visibly wincing.
Tommy gets up now, bringing LSM along to the THUGS's corner and making the tag to John Black!
TAG!
In comes John Black now! He and Tommy Wish share a smile and a look with each other, quickly coming together to work as a tandem! Tommy goes behind LSM, hooking her leg with his as she tries in vain to struggle free.
At the same time, John Black runs off the ropes with a full head of steam, hitting LSM with a vicious lariat that Tommy Wish falls back with, hitting the falling LSM with a Russian Leg Sweep!
Vinnie Lane: “Those are the THUGS for you! Easy to forget just how long they've been a team together. They can really knock you down with some strong teamwork!”
Bama: “It's a stark contrast to Ruby and LSM, who would by all accounts be considered more of a patchwork team.”
Vinnie Lane: “That just means they got more room to grow together!”
LSM seems a bit out of it as John Black tries for a quick pinfall attempt…
ONE!
TWO!
KICKOUT!
Vinnie Lane: “She’s still in this!”
Bama: “Still in it, but not lookin’ so good! She’s going to need to get outta there!”
John Black quickly brings up LSM by the wrist - HARD CHOP TO THE LUCHADORA! LSM recoils from the pain, holding onto her chest after the chop from the much bigger man. The ref goes to check on her and she nods, but JB is on top of her again!
An Irish Whip sends LSM to the THUGS’ corner! JB goes to run and squish her like a bug- OH! LSM MANAGES TO SIDESTEP IT, THOUGH! JB RUNS RIGHT INTO THE CORNER! LSM HAS A CHANCE TO GET MOVING-
ONLY FOR TOMMY WISH TO CLOCK HER IN THE BACK OF THE HEAD WHILE SHE’S MOVING!
Bama: “Talk about a cheap shot! LSM’s reeling!”
Vinnie Lane: “Nobody wants to be stuck behind enemy territory, Bama…”
Ruby is irate at the display by the THUGS as the referee mouths off of Tommy Wish, getting him to obey the rules. Still, that brief assist allows for more than enough time for John Black to get back on his feet, hitting a BRAAAAAAAAAAAINBUSTER!
Vinnie Lane: “BLACKA JACKA! LSM just got jacked at this rate!”
Bama: “This is sickening…”
John Black looks out at the booing crowd, sticking out their thumbs downs with jeers and heckles mixed into it all. He flips them off, shaking his head as he slowly manages to get back onto his feet. LSM though manages to recover thanks to the gap in time, and is beginning to start coming to. Ruby reaaaaaaaaaches out for the tag…
BUT JOHN BLACK GRABS LSM BY THE ANKLE! CUTTING OFF THAT EFFORT!
BUT LSM GETS RIGHT UP AND HITS AN ENZUIGIRIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!
Vinnie Lane: “WOAH! We don’t see that every day from LSM! Guess being cornered like that forced her to try something new!”
Bama: “But is it going to be enough to make the tag?!”
LSM starts to close the distance… right as JB gets onto all fours and crawls after her… but as he reaches out-
TAG!
Bama: “And HERE COMES THE SUPER DEARO’!”
Vinnie Lane: “JB looks like he just saw a ghost!”
Ruby darts in with all the speed and skill a superhero can give, ducking under an attempted lariat as JB gets back onto his feet. Ruby stops on a dime, pausing for but a moment before clocking JB in the back of the head with a Pele Kick!
JB manages to get back onto his feet, gritting his teeth and lunging at Ruby again!
Straight right hand - wrist parried!
Kick to the gut - foot blocked!
Haymaker to the body - swoop back to dodge!
Vinnie Lane: “Ruby’s moving like a woman possessed! How the heck is she doing all this?!”
Bama: “That’s what a hero’s gotta do, baby!”
JB tries to go inside, and he manages to hoist Ruby out of nowhere! The flailing Ruby accidentally takes out the referee in the process, but it’s not like JB cares about that right now! He tries going for the Blacklisted to steal a quick victory here -
BUT RUBY FLIPS OUT INTO THE RUBY CUUUUUUUUUUTTERRRRRRRR!
THE FANS POP LIKE MAD AS RUBY KIPS UP ONTO HER FEET AND STRIKES A POSE FOR ALL IN ATTENDANCE! They love their Anarchy Champion, and right now, who can blame them?!
But it allows for Tommy Wish to go into the ring from the apron and hit Ruby from behind with a double axe handle! Ruby drops onto all fours as the boos are deafening! The stomps start raining down, and right now, the referee can’t put a stop to this!
Bama: “There’s that dastardly teamwork you were goin’ on about, Vin! The THUGS know when to watch out for each other’s backs! LSM ran herself ragged trying to deal with this, and now it’s Ruby’s turn!”
Vinnie Lane: “And speaking of LSM, dude…”
Tommy Wish is tapped on his shoulder from behind! He looks around, only to see LSM back and ready for more! SHE LUNGES FORWARD WITH A SUPERKICK, CATCHING WISH RIGHT ON THE JAW AS SHE GIVES A LITTLE OF HER OWN FLAIR AFTERWARD!
Vinnie Lane: “¡Súper Patada! Look at LSM’s swagger right now! She’s feeling it!”
Tommy staggers back into the ropes, not quite down and out but clearly wobbly on his feet. Ruby manages to get back onto her own feet as well, and the referee comes to, only to see it’s chaos in the ring right now! He starts shouting at all four people in the ring, trying to restore order!
Tommy staggers forward into LSM and Ruby, and they nod in unison! They get their legs ready - DOUBLE ROUNDHOUSE KICK COLLIDES AND CRUSHES HIS HEAD!
LSM SEES JOHN BLACK COMING THROUGH AS THE LEGAL MAN STILL! TOMMY, EXHAUSTED, ROLLS OUT OF THE RING AS JB LINES UP A PUNCH-
BUT LSM GRABS THE INCOMING PUNCH!
Bama: “Oh no.”
Vinnie Lane: “Oh yeah, dude!”
LSM grabs the punch in order to bring John Black in closer, bringing him into a TIGHT front facelock! Sharp knees come up and impact the sternum, keeping JB doubled over as LSM begins slowly backpedaling over to Ruby!
Ruby catches on as both she and LSM seem to be directing traffic to each other! LSM goes to the center of the ring as Ruby scales the ropes!
Bama: “Have to wonder what these two ladies have in mind here on poor John Black!”
Vinnie Lane: “Whatever it is, dude, it’s gonna be a sight to see!”
John Black tries fighting and squirming his way out, but it’s no use! LSM swivels and swirls, hitting the MACHINA ROOOOOOOOOOLL ON JOHN BLACK! He lands right on the back of his neck as LSM follows it up with a sharp right hand onto the nose to keep him down!
And at the same exact time, as LSM proceeds to get off, RUBY LAUNCHES HERSELF FROM THE TOP ROPE!
AND
SHE
HITS
A DIVING DOUBLE FOOT STOMP!
Vinnie Lane: “MACHINA ROLL INTO THE RUBY IN THE ROUGH! What a tandem finishing sequence!”
Ruby stays on top of John Black, hooking the leg for the cover!
ONE!
TWO!
TOMMY WISH COMES IN TO HELP SAVE HIS PARTNER!
BUT HE’S NOT FAST ENOUGH TO SAVE HIMSELF FROM A CRACKING ROUNDHOUSE KICK FROM LATINA SUBMISSION MACHINA!
THREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
Winners by Pinfall - Ruby and Latina Submission Machina
Vinnie Lane: “The champ and the luchadora get it done! What a way to wrap up Anarchy!”
Bama: “That was a BATTLE right there!”
Vinnie Lane: “It sure was Bama... and that's it for another incredible installment of the Blue Brand! We have a real special Yuletide Edition of Anarchy up next that you're not gonna want to miss, and then we'll be back wreaking havoc on Thursday Nights in 2023! See you next year, everyone!”
Bama: “Bah humbug!”
SPECIAL THANKS:
Finn Kuhn
Charlie Nickles
Jason Cashe
BM Oswald
Marf Swaysons
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