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Centurion · (11-21-2020)

OOC: This RP takes place following the attack on Centurion orchestrated by Nathaniel Idenhaus.

(The wrong place at the wrong time.

That’s where Centurion found himself on this fateful Saturday night. Following his move to Chicago in order to pursue his career in the UGWC, Centurion has spent most of his weekends living it up. He is back to being the “old Centurion” – gambling, partying, pretty much the high roller lifestyle, only without being surrounded by multiple women. More on that later.

This particular Saturday Night, Centurion decided to gamble in a local place known as Tricky Dicks, a small casino/bar with a 70’s theme, but less “hippies and leisure suit” 70’s and more “corrupt government” 70’s. It’s a pretty safe place, and known for attracting a high class clientele for their weekly high stakes poker game.

Also on this Saturday Night, the Xtreme Wrestling Federation just so happened to be shooting their Saturday Night Savage show live in Chicago. That means a lot of Centurion’s old friends would be in the city…as well as Centurion’s old enemies.

And current enemies, as well.

We open up outside Tricky Dicks, where multiple cop cars and an ambulance illuminate the night sky. One cop is speaking to actor Danny DeVito, a player at the poker game that was interrupted by Idenhaus’ assault.)

DeVito: …and he just started WAILING on the guy! Like a wolverine! Damndest thing I’ve ever seen in my life! The man had blue eyes and a cop haircut…no offense to either of you.

(The camera zooms past DeVito and the cops to get to Centurion, who is sitting at the edge of the ambulance being seen to by a paramedic. Standing in front of him are Walter, Allison, and Ruby. Ruby looks especially concerned, as she sees her Sisterhood Of Besties (name change pending) buddy being stitched up.)

Centurion: Al, Rubes, I need you two to do me a favor.

(Ruby doesn’t speak. Instead, she just quickly nods her head as Centurion reaches into his pants pocket and pulls out a set of keys and a money clip. He hands the keys over to Allison before gently placing the money clip into Ruby’s hand. He softly closes her hand, in an attempt to reassure her that everything is alright.)

Centurion: Take my car and head back to my place. I don’t want any cash on me just in case. Make sure Athena is fed and the money is put somewhere safe. I’ll be home as soon as I get stitched up.

Ruby: Yes. Absolutely. You got it.

(Ruby takes Allison arm and quickly yanks on it, catching Allison off guard as the two storm toward Centurion’s vehicle. Centurion watches intently as Ruby opens the passenger side door of the vehicle and gets into the car.)

Centurion: Think she’s far enough away?

Walter: Yeah, I don’t think she can hear you.

Centurion: Good….THAT FUCKING NAZI MOTHER FUCKER!!

(The EMT gets startled as all the cops quickly turn to look at Centurion. He is now steaming – his face is red and a vein looks like it is about to pop out of his neck.)

Centurion: Who the fuck does this guy think he is? Comes into Chicago, tracks me down, assaults me while I’m enjoying a night out. That’s what these fucking fascists do. They attack you, instigate violence, and then they brand themselves as the victims on social media and get their own show on OAN or Pranger U or something.

Walter: Only you would find some way to turn an assault that occurred by someone you’ve been calling out for months into a political statement.

Centurion: It IS political, Walter. It’s been political. It’s been political from the very first day. By the way, did I ever tell you Dennis Pranger smells like old cheese?

Walter: You’ve mentioned it…

Centurion: Well, he does.

Walter: Look, Savage is in Chicago. You re-challenged Nathaniel a week ago. Of course he was going to seek you out. You’re not talking about someone who does things “on the level”. The moment he found out you were in town, he set his sights on you. Hell, he probably had this date circled in his calendar the day you challenged him for High Stakes.

Centurion: You know what he could have done, Walter? He could have walked out to the ring and said “I accept”. Hell, he could have taken some pot shots at me while he was at it. Call me old and boring – you know, the old classics. To attack me in public? He’s lucky I’m not like everyone else, or his ass would be in jail.

Walter: Well, yeah. That’s the point.

(Centurion raises an eyebrow up at Walter.)

Walter: You’re not like everyone else. That’s why he did it. He knew what your reaction would be. He knew you wouldn’t press charges. Put the shoes on the other feet. If you knew someone you hated was out enjoying a night on the town, and you knew there would be no repercussions, wouldn’t you take a swing or two at them?

(Centurion thinks back to all the unnecessary fights he got into when he was younger – fights that he knew wouldn’t land him in trouble – and he just cracks a smile. The EMT places a bandage on Centurion’s stitched up head and steps away from him.)

EMT: You don’t have a concussion. Still, I’d much rather see you go to the hospital just so we…

Centurion: I’m fine, thank you.

(The EMT just sort of scoffs before walking away. Centurion stands up from the ambulance, as Walter helps stabilize him when he gets to his feet. Centurion puts both his hands out in an attempt to show he’s fine before standing up straight and looking directly at Walter.)

Centurion: He got one over on me.

Walter: He sure as hell did. What are you going to do about it?

Centurion: …I’m going to kill the motherfucker.

(Walter pats Centurion on the shoulder.)

Walter: Yes. Yes you are.

------I Like White Folks, But I Don’t Like You------

First, you had my attention.

Then, you had my ire.

Now? Now I’m going to unleash unholy hell on you, you little fascist prick.

Oh, let’s get that out of the way now, since it was something you talked about over and over again when we were about to tussle last time. You claim you “changed”. You’re no longer “NAZI” – you’re just Nathaniel now. You’re no longer a Nazi. You were just “confused”, and now you’re trying to rebuild yourself as a normal human being or some shit.

Yeah…that doesn’t work for me, and it doesn’t work for the millions of people you tried to victimize.

Here’s how this shit works, Nate. You don’t get to say when your past “is behind you”. Not when you were a goose-stepping fascist. You don’t get to just brush that shit under the carpet and move on like it never happened. No, you need to PAY for that shit. You need to pay HARD for all the things you have said and done in the past. And then?

Well, if people decide to forgive you after you’ve taken the acceptable amount of ass kickings, then fine. But you’re nowhere near the acceptable amount.

Not that I believe any of that bullshit anyway. The person who brought you back in the first place was Shane

, who may in fact be the absolute worst person on the planet. You’ve cheap shotted me – twice – and you damn near killed Boris a few months ago, which is like trying to kill a teddy bear – a really drunk, incredibly stupid teddy bear. So even if you renounced your Nazi ways, you sure haven’t stopped being an asshole.

And that’s the thing, Nate. This isn’t just about you. It’s about everything you represent. You’re the perfect embodiment of the American political movement in the post-Trump world. There are going to be tons of people making these statements like “I never REALLY supported the guy”, and all these Republican senators are going to act like the last four years never happened, and there is a certain segment of the population that’s going to buy it because they’re fucking braindead. They say it’s “time to move on” and that we “need to come together.”

No, fuck that, because there’s another group of people who won’t have that opportunity. That’s the black folks who stand on the streets fighting against a system that is killing innocent people. It’s the children who come from impoverished and war torn countries who were ripped away from their parents with no trace and no chance of being returned. It’s the women who had to sit back and listen to a misogynist and a man with credible rape allegations against him completely invalidate their stories and their existence. It’s the trans folks who saw their protections being ripped away by the federal government, while more and more of their siblings are either murdered or pushed into suicide. And it’s the families of 220,000 people who will never get to see their loved ones again, thanks to the inaction of a government run by a reality TV star.

There is no “moving on”, and there is no “coming together”. Not until there is reckoning. Not until folks have properly paid for the pain that has been inflicted on this country. And as much as I would like to beat up Lindsey Graham or Eric Trump, I don’t have that opportunity, and I never will.

But I can beat the shit out of you, Nate. I can beat the shit out of a man who openly called for genocide a mere few years ago, and now wishes to just let his past be dead and buried. And while it won’t make up for the years and year of hardships placed on marginalized communities around the country…it sure as hell going to make me feel good.

Is it fair to you that I place an entire political movement on your shoulders? Is it fair that I turn you into a spokesperson – hell, a scapegoat – for an entire group of people? Is it fair? Probably not.

But I really don’t care. Because it’s not fair that every time a member of ISIS bombs a town in Syria, Ilhan Omar has to denounce them as the figurehead of all Muslims living in the United States. That’s how this shit works. This isn’t the 90’s. We no longer live in a West Wing world where we can just move on from petty political differences; where we can yell and scream at each other, and then share a beer together. That world is dead. There’s too much on the line now for good folks to allow evil folks to go unchecked.

And yes, Nate, you are evil. Regardless of whatever political affiliation you may self-identify with at this particular moment, the fact it you are still the embodiment of evil. So are your entire clan of misfits. And you may not be out there quoting Mein Kampf anymore, but I bet you could drop an old lady off the top of a bridge and feel no remorse. Look me in the eyes and tell me I’m wrong.

All of this ALONE is reason enough to want to destroy you. If the only thing about you was your history, I’d still want to kick the living shit out of you. If the only thing you did was attack me in the middle of the ring, I’d still go out of my way to get my revenge on you. But no, there’s one more egregious thing you did that really pissed me off.

You took the Hart Title – the same title I held for over 200 days, and the title I put so much time an effort into making a big deal – and you took a shit on it. You won the title match because Hired Gun wasn’t interested in being champion. You then proceeded to lose to PASHA – the worst roster member of a really shitty wrestling federation. We then didn’t see the belt for over a month, until it was handed back to you, only for you to instantly drop it to Robbie Bourbon. Am I missing anything here? Any part of that story I left out?

You were only a Hart Champion because of me. And no, this isn’t some “I paved the way for you” speech like you see from other veterans of my time. No, this is quite literal. After my match with Hired Gun, you were next in line for a match against me. It was set in stone. You did nothing to earn it. I had to lobby for that match, because most of the folks backstage didn’t think you deserved a title shot, but I wanted to teach you a lesson. And just before I was able to do that, Gun was able to beat me and end my title reign.

Well, you were already booked for a Hart Title match, and they couldn’t take you out of that, right? They gave you their word, and so, despite the fact that I was no longer champion and despite the fact that you never won a match to earn said title shot, you were given a match against Hired Gun. And the rest is history.

I’ve heard rumors about your “other life”. Rumors that you may be something a bit more than human. I don’t know what to believe and what not to believe. I assumed all of this mystical stuff was crap, but I was just in a relationship with a 400 year old succubus, so I don’t discount anything anymore. I will say, though…for your sake, I hope it’s true. I hope you’re an immortal werewolf that is impervious of pain, because if you’re NOT – if you’re nothing more than a normal human with a superiority complex – then really bad things are about to happen to you. The fight I took to Shawn Warstein? The absolute battering we put each other through during the undisputed best match of the year? That is going to look like a pillow fight compared to what I have in store for you.

A Texas Bullrope Match? I love it. You are going to have nowhere to run. You’re not going to be able to weasel your way out of this. You’re not going to be able to pull off some bullshit disqualification that will allow you to walk away with your head held high. No, you’re going to be tied to me, and this match will end when I fucking say it ends. You’re going to bleed. A lot. And you’re going to see the smile on my face while your blood flows like a river through the town of Tombstone.

You’re not getting the normal “Final Fantasy” send off. Not this time. No, instead, my official tagline will be the unofficial moto of the City of Philadelphia – the city that put the finishing blow into Donald Trump’s golden tower. The new official moto of folks around the country who are stomping out the seeds of fascism wherever it may grow.

Fuck Around And Find Out.

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