Threaded Mode | Linear Mode

John Austin · (06-17-2013)

Church. I hate church....but, I love my wife. So, once a week, I come here and sit in an uncomfortable wooden pew and listen to the most boring man alive, spew god's word. Listen to a bunch of bullshit and hear about how I'm in the need of salvation. That my soul is eternally damned, if I don't accept the lord into my soul and give myself fully over to his command. Yeah, I'll pass. My soul isn't in need of cleansing, or saving. As far as completely turning my will over to God, I'd prefer to think for myself, thank you very much. I don't need a spiritual fairy, sitting on my shoulder to remind me what good, or bad is. I don't need the watchful eye of Christ to prevent me from committing crimes, or other unspeakable acts. I know the differences between right and wrong. I enjoy the freedom of choosing what to do on my own and I don't need, to feel guilty about the choices I make either.

Every week I climb into a ring and earn a living by brutalizing the fuck out of another man. It's primal, it's barbaric, but it makes me feel alive. Do I feel guilty about doing it? No, I don't....not in the slightest. Do I hate that I've been lying to my wife about it? Yes, but technically I came clean to her about it. It's not really my fault, she didn't believe me. Sure, I still left my home last week and went to Brazil, with her thinking I had been kidding and therefore continued the lie, but at least I threw it all out there. How she chose to acknowledge it, wasn't really my fault. Yet I can't help but think, I could have done a better job on releasing the truth. Which is why I've decided to tell her about everything tonight. I wonder how that will go?

Liz Weinberg, told me a career in the XWF becomes your life. That you need to find a way to mesh your personal life, with what you do in the XWF, or it'll destroy you. I believed her. I mean I had only been in one match and already Steve knew about my personal life. What was next? Would there be reporters coming to my home, to question my wife? Photographers in bushes? No, I would want to be the one to tell my wife about things before, that happened. I more than likely should have told her about my career in the XWF right away, but I didn't want her to discourage things. Plus if I had fallen flat on my face and tasted defeat, no one would know about that but me. I won my first match though and my second, I was now preparing to engage in my third. This career's momentum was gaining speed and it was bound to start getting people to notice. Even if I wrestled under the name Joe Tuesday, it wasn't like I kept my identity a secret. So I would have to man up and explain the drastic change in careers I made to my wife and just hope for the best.

See now, I decided that all on my own. God, Jesus and the whole spiritual bowling squad of saints, didn't play a factor in this. I did it because I know, deep down it's the right thing to do. So then why do I need to be told I'm going to hell? Why do I need to be told to, seek salvation and accept Jesus as my savior and to turn my will over to God? Why do I need any of this bullshit tossed my way? I work hard, I'm not a bad guy...despite the fact I beat people up for a living. I love my wife and I support, provide and care for her. I wouldn't do anything to hurt her, or harm her. Yet here I am, listening to this priest drone on and on, about spiritual cleansing. The more I hear him speak, the more I feel like I'm being lulled into slumber. Sedated by his voice and tranquilized by his long winded words. I don't find peace of mind, or serenity in what he's got to say. It's more like I struggle to stay awake as I sit here. Even now I can feel my eyelids growing heavy...

BAM!

Oh fuck! It's finally happened! I feel asleep in church and cracked my head on the back of the pew in front of me. Shit! That's fucking hurt! Not only did it hurt, but it got everyone's attention too. Geez, it got almost the same reaction as if I tossed a live grenade in here. I think I heard gasps and there may have been a woman who exclaimed the words - Well, I never! Yeah, I committed the unthinkable and now I'll be the church gossip for months. Looking around, I can still see people shaking their heads and muttering their disapproval.

Don't mind me, I'm just the insensitive ass that fell asleep in church and embarrassed my wife. Oh and by the look of things, she's pissed. Well, this should make the ride home from church a fun one. Now I'll get to hear all the reasons about what I did, caused a scene. I'll bite my tongue too. Why? Well, because it's not really something I feel the need to start a fight over and besides that, I am the idiot who couldn't stay awake for a half hour in church. What's that about? I don't have narcolepsy. What, just cause I'm bored, I have to fall asleep? That's pretty pathetic...especially for the fact that, I'm here for my wife. Sure, I think this whole ordeal is pointless and a waste of time. Of coarse, I think the entire concept of religion and church, is a big fucking joke, but my wife doesn't and it's out of respect for her that I endure this crap. That's my one and only reason that I put up with this. That's what happens when you love someone. Sometimes you have to sit there and shut up, while you put up with something you don't like, in order to make that person happy. She really isn't asking too much from me to stay awake. So in that respect, I'll keep quite when she obsesses over my blunder. I'll nod, agree and apologize even. Just to keep things peaceful.

Hearing all this church nonsense reminds me of my upcoming match on Madness. I'm teaming with Scott Charlotte and taking on John Austin and Shocker, in a Tornado Tag match. I really don't have clue, what a Tornado Tag match is, or how it defers from a regular tag team match. I'll get to find out first hand though, tomorrow. The reason I'm reminded about this match that's coming up, is from sitting in church and having religion crammed down my throat. Mostly because of who my opponents are. Well, really because John Austin, is one of those opponents. The cult leader zealot, with a tenacity to preach on and on, like talking is going out of style. He talks about me and Scott like he's got this match won and it hasn't even started yet. Sure, I may be new to this occupation, but I think the combined forces of Scott Charlotte and myself, isn't something that should be taken lightly. I know I won't simply fall over and Scott sure as hell doesn't seem to be a man; who'll be anything besides, a tough as nails asshole in the ring. So this lunatic had better get his mind wrapped around the idea, that he just may not be walking out the winner tomorrow. In fact he better start thinking about how he'll feel after he incurs a loss, cause I'm going to make it my priority...to come straight for him. I'll really put the fear of the lord into that piece of shit. I'll beat him down so badly, even he'll question what the lord's intentions really were. Although he's a psychopath cult leader, he may see a beat down and a loss as a test of his faith. I can see him pulling that one out of his ass. When in reality God's got nothing to do with, what's going to happen to him. No, his ass kicking is coming straight from me personally, to him and the only thing fueling me, will be my adrenaline and that drive to see that sack of shit laying broken and beaten on the canvas. It'll be a beautiful sight indeed.

As for my other opponent, Shocker...I don't really know much about him, other then he doesn't leave much of an impression. I'll let Scott handle that guy. I'm more interested in the preacher. I wonder if his whole cult will be tuned in, to see him fail? If a loss won't test the maniac minister's faith, will it test theirs? Will it make them wonder about their leader? Pull the wool back from their eyes and see the truth, about who their allowing to lead them. Oh boy, the way he's captivated my attention, you'd think I was one of his followers, but I just can't keep my mind off how much fun it'll be to inflict pain on that prick and how sweet the victory will be, when I claim it. Maybe...I have a soft spot for people being taken advantage of. Maybe that's why, I want to rip that guy apart, so much. He's taking advantage of the stupid and the morally oppressed, by preaching his garbage. Although, anyone stupid enough to follow him, should probably be euthanized...in all honesty. If you're that deluded, that you think John Austin is your 'Personal Jesus' - you're a bit too far gone to be helped. Still...I hate men like him and the satisfaction of introducing his head, to my boot is a feeling I'll extremely enjoy. It's a good thing the match is taking place on Madness - the home of the extreme. Okay...that was cheesy, but I couldn't help it. Let's hope I don't allow myself to spurt anything that bad out, when I have that talk later on with my wife.

Threaded Mode \| Linear Mode Endurance
Author	Message