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Phantom Panzer · (08-09-2017)

"OH FUCK! SETH FEDER IS PULLING OUT THE FUCKIN' BIG GUN REFERENCES! Bitch is aiming that shit and it's flying STRAIGHT

past me, because you can miss me with that gay shit.

So, Seth. Doink, Pennywise, Puddles, Violator, even GODDAMN HOMEY THE CLOWN! HOLY SHIT! YOU'RE GOIN' FUCKIN' HARD IN THE PAINT WITH THAT SHIT!

Seriously, Bitch Baby. Can I call you Bitch Baby? Doesn't fucking matter if I can or not. I'm going to refer to you as Bitch Baby from now on. Mostly because you're a punk ass bitch, getting by on the Feder name. Well, it seems like it's more Lane's name now, isn't it? Either way, you were given things you didn't earn. You were given opportunities that should've kept you in the record books for eons. But what did you do? YA DONE FUCKED UP, SAHN!

See, your brother Sid, may have been the inspiration for the Federweight, but I only needed to win that belt ONCE to prove that I'm fucking better than all you motherfucks. I gave UP the belt, because it wasn't worth holding anymore. I didn't give a FUCK dude. You think that the shit I just went through wasn't fucking real!? BITCH! I DON'T SHOW SHIT, UNLESS IT'S FUCKIN' REAL! AND THAT WAS REAL! Holy hell! You think I enjoyed being fucking in space, having to adapt my body to growing like a goddamn Galactus and being able to breathe in a FUCKING VACUUM!? I had to create AIR so I could BREATHE! Yes. I do breathe. I have two hearts, three lungs, two dicks, and seven balls. Why? BECAUSE I'M A GODDAMN FREAKY CLOWN PIMP AND I WILL DO WHATEVER THE FUCK I WANT! You're goddamn lucky that I don't fuckin' use my powers in the ring. So fucking lucky. I'd just break your legs and fold your ass until you're perpetually laying on your back, and I would place my foot on you and win with you incapable of kicking out. Want to know why I don't do it?

Here's why!"

Panzer slaps himself a couple times

"The reason why I don't do these things in the ring, as I've stated before in some other promo somewhere, I don't fucking know, anyway. It's because it's too fucking bullshit on you normies. How would you be capable of facing me? I'd just automatically win, with little to no work. How are you fucks going to win? How do you combat a God? I can reshape your entire existence. I can make it so you were born from some fucked up skeevy ass, never washed her pussy in fifty years, fuckin' crackwhore with AIDS. You ain't nothing to the power of a fuckin' God. I do this shit for fun! FOR FUCKING SHITS AND GIGGLES! It's because I enjoy watching you little fucking humans and your pathetic attempts at winning "precious" metals that are affixed to fucking colored leather. Seriously, broh. You think that you are going to beat me? You think you can beat the Clown? You think that I'm going to let you fuckin' walk over mer?

Nah. You ain't fuckin' shit, but shit. You live off of your name, and you have done FUCK ALL to show your family your fucking worth. Maybe you won a title before the current, but that shit isn't fucking important now, is it? Because if we look closely at the list of those who have won a big title, not one named after your brother or the heavymetalweight, your fucking ass isn't there on the lists. Wanna know who IS on the lists? Your fucking brother and Big Poppa Fuckwit Feder. They've done some shit and they've actually fucking MATTERED in this company, Seth.

Now, you can try all you fucking want to try and put me down, that's fine, I expect you try and very terribly go after my looks again. You will try and say "You won a belt named after my brother, you're nothing. My brother is the reason why you had a belt to begin with!" And I will say "Yeah, but I still won a belt, though, didn't I?" And you'll cry like the BABY BITCH you are.

I'm ignoring most of the shit you even said because you're so fucking dumb that you didn't realize what the fuck I am, who the fuck I am. I don't need a name attached to me to give me fucking byes into the fucking semi-finals of the tournament. I don't expect a goddamn hand out and you should be a-fuckin-shamed of not having to earn your shit. FUCK, man, I shouldn't even be here and the only fucking reason I am is because Sinclair was a fucking

, and because Barney, the actual FUCKING LEGEND between the two of you, tried and fucking lost.

What fucking hope do you have? You're a nobody except a name. I have more of a price on me than your fucking stupid ass. You going to contact your fake daddy? You gonna try and get Sid soon so he can take your fucking place, and I can actually fight someone that has some fucking worth to his name? Someone who has held belts?

Seriously, Lane, you brought FUCKING SETH into a fight with me? Did you expect him to win? You expect him to actually try and win the King of the Ring? Well it's not fuckin' happening, Fucko!

There's only one piece of business I will address from your entire fucking rant about how people are gay and how I want Trax to suck my dick.

It's called TRASH TALKING, you fucking

. Seriously, I thought Scully was fucking

, but WOOO BOY! You fucking take THE GODDAMN CAKE! Do I want Trax to really suck my dick? Nah. He's a fucking Clowncist. I don't take kindly to his kind 'round these parts. Goddamn jiggaboo.

Let's go back to you, though, Seth.

You're a goddamn nutcase if you think you're going to win. More fucking psycho than Super Mario who thought he was going to fucking be something, but was a complete bitch and complained that he was put down, time and time again. But hey, you'll know what that fucking feels like soon enough, won't you, Fuccboi Feder?

Yeah. You try to act like you're fucking amazing, but who the fuck are you? No, literally. I want you to get a shit and a shave, and while you're on the porcelain throne, I want you to say to yourself these words "Who AM I?" and then fucking think long and hard. Because if you say "I'm Papa Feder's kid." or "I'm Lane's illegitimate child." then you should know something, Bitch Baby, and this is what you should learn:

You. Are. Nothing.

Simple as that. If you have nothing else to offer than "I'm 10x Better SETH FEDER" then, what the fuck actually makes you 10x better than any of us, when you haven't fucking shown it? What actually makes you think that you're fucking better than anyone?

Yeah. You're not. You're just Seth. Seth Nobody.

Get the fuck outta here."

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