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Thomas Nixon · (01-14-2017)

Scene 10
Dallas, Texas
November 22nd, 2017

The eighteen year old, Thomas Nixon, sits in a small room on the fourth floor of the Texas School Book Depository. Lee Harvey Oswald is two floors above Nixon and one floor over to the west. At least, Oswald would be above Nixon once Kennedy’s motorcade appeared in Dealey Plaza. Until then, Nixon was hidden in a random, abandoned room of the book depository. Just to play it safe, Nixon was crouched down in the corner behind random objects that fill the storage room. He would be found easily if someone was looking for him, but this was simply a precautionary measure.

Nixon holds a small walkie talkie at his side, and he holds it close and ready. In case anything goes wrong, that’s how he would get the message. But Nixon has a few more hours until John F. Kennedy would arrive in Dealey Plaza.

* * *

It wasn’t until 12:30 in the afternoon, when President Kennedy’s motorcade turns left onto the straight away that heads directly towards the book depository. Nixon sits in the corner of the fourth story room, his gun at the ready a few feet back from the slightly open window.

“Here he is,” the walkie talkie utters. Nixon can almost feel the grin on Lee’s face.

Nixon watches the motorcade slowly roll down the street, preparing to look down the scope of the rifle after Lee fires the initial shot. The small crowd in Dealey Plaza cheers as the President waves.

The car approaches the end of the straight away. Nixon’s heart is thumping in his throat.

“Lee, are you going to take the sh-“, but Thomas is cut off be a loud boom.

Just as the presidential motorcade turned left onto Elm, the first shot rings out. The world seems to slow down and speed up simultaneously. Everything afterward happened so fast, yet Nixon is aware of every little thing. He can feel his accelerated heart beat and his hands shaking while holding the gun.

John F. Kennedy’s last interaction went something like this. The first lady of Texas turns to the president, as the four political figures enter Dealey Plaza. She says, “Mr. President, you can’t say Dallas doesn’t love you.” And Kennedy’s final words were, “No, you certainly can’t.”

Kennedy’s brains were promptly splattered onto the back of the limousine.

After the initial shot rings out, two more shots are fired. Neither of which came from the gun of Thomas Nixon. He hears the first bullet ring out, and his eyes go blank. With the gun in hand, he stares at the chaos of Dealey Plaza. By the time the second and third bullet are discharged, Nixon finds himself sprinting down the stairs and jumping out a second floor window of the Texas School Book Depository.

Without ever looking back, Nixon ran. He continues to sprint, until he is miles away from Dealey Plaza. His gun was abandoned in a bush early into his escape, likely to be found but it never would be attributed to Nixon. At a pay phone some miles from Dealey Plaza, Nixon calmly requests a cab, before he soon finds himself in his hotel room. With the door shut behind him, he collapses into the fetal position and allows tears to stream down his face.

He had failed.

He failed his mission, the mission entrusted to him by his friends, family, and elders. It was Nixon’s job to ensure that Kennedy never saw the light of day, but when the plan became reality, he shut down. He didn’t even attempt to shoot at the President, and he did nothing to ensure that Lee finished the job. At this point, he didn’t know if the President was killed, and he should have at least stuck around to find that out.

Now, Nixon waited. He could turn on the news and see how it all played out or he could hope that one of the elders would call his hotel room. Either way, he couldn’t bare finding the true results of his inaction. His return flight was in the morning, giving him a lot of time to stew on his grave error. The first time in his life that Thomas Nixon had truly failed.

* * *

“Bitter, cynical people like to operate under a strange belief that people are incapable of change. That is the furthest thing from the truth. In life, experiences shape the person you are and the way you act. Ten years from now, I will be different in some capacities, especially if I’m exposed to the dangers of my lifestyles. Consequences, outcomes, and other events give people the opportunity to change.

As I reflect on my failure, fifty-three years in the past, I see a boy that grew up into a much more successful man.

Nobody is born with the power and skill to excel under pressure. It takes training to develop that attribute. It takes time to learn how to keep calm when the next thirty seconds will either change your life or the people you love’s lives. This is a skill that I’ve learned.

Every month, I do a truly horrible thing. I end the life of a miserable woman, not because it has to specifically be a whore, but because they are the people that are suffering and have no way out. Regardless, I’m taking a life away from another being. And to do this in the clean way that I have to, I need to stay calm and act with precision.

In Dealey Plaza, there was no way that I could’ve acted with accuracy. There was no way that I could’ve shot John F. Kennedy and inflicted lethal wounds. I failed to keep my head on straight and I crumbled under the burden I was bearing.

But the times have changed. Now, I’ve developed the ability to keep cool. I’ve overcome the brain’s simple minded tricks. I no longer allow myself to turn on my fight or flight instincts. I maintain composure, and I keep the brain active when I’m in a tough scenario. That’s how I manage to stifle the screams of the prostitutes I have to kill, and that’s how I don’t let the high stakes of my championship matches get to my head.

I’ve learned how to win under tough circumstances. I don’t let my emotions get in the way, and I don’t let the adrenaline take control of my body. That separates me from the pack. Some wrestlers here haven’t been tested the ways I’ve been tested. They haven’t held a rifle with tens of thousands of lives on the line. Although I failed to take action, that moment was impactful in the course of my life. It changed me. I knew that failure was unacceptable, and I was lucky enough to have a partner that took care of the job without my help. But sometimes, I won’t be so lucky.

Choking is not an option. As I look ahead to my match against Gabe Reno and Chris Chaos, I know that choking is not a choice. This opportunity is arguably the biggest stage that I’ve been able to take in my short time here. This is my first match to even get some cheesy tag lines. This match isn’t just a three way, but “Bragging rights and alpha status on the line!”, the headline reads.

As silly and over the top as that sounds, that headline sums up why this match is important to me. Sure, I don’t like Gabe Reno and I’m not fond of Chaos, but what the match comes down to is the implications of beating these two competitors. It’s about winning the respects of the boys in the back and the XWF fans because I stood toe to toe with the Universal Champion and a wrestler that is in contention for that belt.

Those “bragging rights” give me something to point to next time an idiot like Chris Chaos declares me a “paper champion”. No matter how much success I’ve had and no matter how many great, main event level title defenses I stack up, some people refuse to give me the credit that I deserve. Some people can’t read the writing on the wall that boldly states that I’m one of the best competitors in the XWF.

But after I walk into the ring as Television Champion, and I walk out having defeated the Universal Champion, it’s going to be a lot harder to disparage me without lying through your teeth. That’s why this match is so important, and that’s why I’m glad I’ve had my failures. Those failures in the past allowed me to learn, and now I’m not ignorant to what pressure can do to talented people. I know how to cope with the stress and the tension, and I’ve learned how few wrestlers can keep calm once momentum shifts in the favor of their opponents. Once I get Gabe and Chris on their heels, they won’t be able to get a nagging thought out of their mind.

“What if Nixon actually beats me?”

And once that thought crosses your mind, it’s all over. That defeatist mentality cripples athletes, especially the kinds that are so worried about their perception. And I’m competing with two egotistical men. For their sake, they better hope that this isn’t their first rodeo, and they better know they learned from their past mistakes. Because if I land a hard knee to the jaw, they could easily start thinking about those destructive thoughts. The thoughts that allow me to shock the XWF world and pick up a game changing victory.

This match isn’t about jokes. It isn’t about style, and it certainly isn’t about being flashy. This is a giant stage to make a statement. This time, I’m not a child. I’ve grown up, and I’ve learned something vital. I’ve learned the feeling of failure and I’ve used that to motivate me more than ever. Come Warfare, failure is not an option.”

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