---

Matthew Oaktree stands in a gym in workout gear and padded gloves. He strikes a heavy bag as sweat pours from his brow. The gym is large but empty, sparring ring, weight benches, treadmills go unused as only the sound of the bag being smacked echoes throughout the gym. Oaktree is out of breath, still punching the bag with all his strength but stops as he hears footsteps coming close to him across the wooden floor. Matthew stops punching the bag and grabs a towel, wiping his face as he turns to Kirk MacClay, who stands in a suit, hands in his pockets looking at Matthew.

"What the hell are you doing?"

Oaktree chuckles before taking a sip of water.

"Training, what else?"

"You're an idiot for going through with this you know that right? And you're an asshole for sticking me with running the show."

"I'm still helping, like always this thing is 50/50. And you have Jack and Matteal on top of everything."

"C'mon Matt. You know as well as me you're a GM, not a wrestler. You shouldn't be in that ring, you should be watching over it."

"Well it's a good thing I have you making sure we don't shit the bed. Anyway, I'm only going to be away from my desk for one match."

"Unless you're in hospital from a missing asshole."

Oaktree laughs and shakes his head.

"Like I'm going to lose to Grandpa Dick. He's a 100 year old man with brittle bones and a brain full of bullshit. I'm no spring chicken myself but I did box, and I haven't forgot how to knock someone on their ass."

"Tch... You know I actually hope you lose so I can have the pleasure of ripping you a new asshole."

"The hell has crawled up your ass? You ran Madness basically single-handedly, why you pissed that I'm not 100% focused this week?"

Oaktree takes another drink as he sits on a nearby bench, the towel around his neck. MacClay scratches the top of his head before replying.

"I don't know, I just think this is really fucking stupid."

"Of course it's stupid. It's probably the dumbest thing I've seen in my life, and I've watched a Frodo Smackins promo. But think about it, XWF, Warfare, it's pretty fucking stupid. I'm just giving the people what they want Kirk, and I get to kick an ungrateful employee's ass while doing it. Win, win."

"Right. Win fucking win. Just don't get yourself killed."

Kirk goes to walk away from Matthew.

"Kirk! Make sure you send me the paperwork for the 8th."

"Emailed them to you yesterday."

"Right, thanks."

Oaktree gets to his feet and goes back to the heavy bag, striking it again as the scene fades to black.

---

"."

"."

"."

"All I've heard building up to this week. Dick E. operates the same way some of the lesser talent do in this place, thinking because a word is usually used as an insult it means that it truly hurts me ever so deeply. The fact is though, it doesn't bother me in the slightest. I've watched every single promo that comes up for every show of Wednesday Night Warfare, do you know how many times I've heard the word ? It's simply lost all meaning. But Dick still thinks that gay jokes will somehow work. Why? Because he is a lesser human being, a dickless piece of dried up shit who thinks that this type of stuff is funny or will actually make me lose the will to live."

"It's funny. See, this is all Dick has. This is his entire arsenal. When he called me out, saying I didn't do my job because Ethan Bird interfered in his match, he dropped that pretty fucking quickly didn't he? That's because he knows I do my job pretty damn well, so he went to plan B, which seems to be his only real plan. Call me a and hope for the best, fucking outstanding really. It's even more funny because the first thing Dick wanted was to feed me my own asshole as a stip for this match. Now, you would think since he previously claimed I couldn't do my fucking job, he would say I would have to step down from being a GM and maybe he could take my place, right? Well there's the funny thing. Dick knows I do my job well, he knows he couldn't do my job, shit he can barely do his piss easy job. I actually had to step in for that ancient fuck once and do his job because he was off dreaming about my asshole."

"Yes, he wants to get a hold of my asshole, and he calls me a . He actually said this to me too."

Dick E. Tickler Said:I hope your ass(hole) is ready...


....

"And I'm supposed to be the in this situation. What are you gonna do Dick? Down some Viagra get that shriveled up pecker working and dig it into my anus, hoping if you apply enough pressure my asshole will just pop out? Now, why did I want Dick's balls to be cut off? I could have stripped him of his referee duties instead, oh but wait! I'm his boss, so I can do that at any given moment. Well, I'm one of his bosses if you want to get technical. Now he's probably going to cry and get all pissy saying I'm not his boss or whatever, but the fact is I am. But I'm a shitty boss right Dick? Yeah, I saw that dumb ass reply coming too you fucking . Whatever, you're just going to call me a a hundred more times anyway in the hopes it will get you somewhere."

"This wrinkled prick is a referee, or meant to be one at least, but yet he insists on dressing up like a Drill Sergeant. Playing dress up, acting tough, the constant homophobic remarks. Classic case of denial. Dick, it's okay if you want to come out the closet. We're all grown ups here, well, most of us are. It's fine if you want to confess your love of cock, you already sound like Frodo, might as well go the whole nine yards and be a poor man's version of him."

"Now I hope you know there is no way you can win. I mean I'm your boss. I'm Drew Archyle's boss. The reason the little prick is even involved in this match is to remind him who his boss is and also because he doesn't like you either. But I'm your boss Dick, Drew wouldn't make his boss lose. I could rip up the contract so the stipulations are null and void. I could get you fired before you walk down the ramp. I could make you fight every single person under the Warfare banner instead of me. But I don't have to do all that, and I won't do that. Why? Because you have zero fucking chance in beating me. Not a single iota. You have a better chance of being respected by your grandkids. Better chance of finding a woman you can finally die with. Better chance of actually being a fully functional human being in society. Your days are numbered old man."

"I'm done for today, make sure you wash your weird old man balls for once before they get cut off and hung on your drag wall."

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