Hi, I'm Michael Radio. I will be participating in the opening round of the world war xtreme pay per view for the united states championship. I'll get to that in a bit because first I want to tell you all about myself. I grew up on the planet Gado about 160 years from now. As soon as I turned six I was shipped off to a command training facility where I had to learn how to become a great soldier! It was a lot of hard work and dedication but eventually it all paid off! I became one of the greatest soldiers to ever live and after years of fighting of other races I decided to retire and leave the galaxy saving to my son. I came to this time by accident believe it or not. The machine that I used malfunctioned and sent me back way too many years and that's why I'm here today. I wish that machine hadn't of malfunctioned but everything happens for a reason right? There's a reason why I'm on Theo Pryce's team, there's a reason why he put me in the first round. I'm on Theo's team because Eli is Bitch. I don't want some creepy religious prick running the XWF which I am starting to get fond of but how can I like it when Eli James the fourth is running it?! Eli James will fall at the pay per view and then what will he do? Nothing, that's what. And now to answer why Theo put me in the first round. He hates just as much as I hate him but he knows that I'm good. He's not such a bad man once you end up on the same team as him because he gave me a chance to win the united states championship. That won't be that hard of a task though because All I have to do is beat Bitch Lucena. This is the first time I've ever heard of him! How come that some asshole who relies on cheating can just waltz right into the XWF and get a United States championship match? I've been working my ass off for almost an entire year and this bitch shows up within a month and gets this shot! Hell no! This is an injustice! I'm not only going to be destroying Bitch Lucena for me so I can win the united states championship but I'm also going to be doing it for the team! The moment I pin that Bitch is the moment when five members of Theo Pryce come out and absolutely gang rape two members of team Eli James. Not literally of course because that would be weird. Now let me turn my full attention to Bitch Lucena! Promo time!


Bitch Lucena told this cute little story about a multitude of different things but mostly about how his dream was to be a wrestler or whatnot. This Spanish fuck doesn't know how to tell a good story! He goes from talking about pro wrestling to not being a homophobe (because he's in the closet) to strippers and then to Michelle Obama. I'll give him this, he knows how to change the topic pretty quickly. And when I look at him all I want to think is "why is he even here?" He's from Spain! Go back you to Spain you Spanish Bitch! I hate every bit of this planet that is including the United States and I couldn't give any less of a damn for it. I don't want the championship so I can represent this stupid country, I want this championship because... It's a championship! Why would anyone want it just for the united states? Oh right, that's what Bitch Lucena wants it for? The bitch from Spain wants the United States championship. He wanted me removed from the match because I don't deserve to hold the title because I hate this country more than anyone?! Ha! He's scared because he knows he's going to lose! Aw, poor bitch wants to fight someone easier. Sadly for him anyone on my team could've kicked his ass all over the ring. Tactics. He has tactics to pin me. He imagined laying on top of me for hours in the day trying to think of "tactics." I'm starting to really think that Bitch Lucena is really in the closet. Note to self everyone out there! Do not think of ways to pin someone for hours! It's pretty gay! Here's what you do, Bitch. You think of tactics to beat the shit out of someone. Not think of ways of how you're going to roll them up, lay on top of them for a pin, or grab their trunks or tights. That's pretty creepy. So, apparently Bitch Lucena laught about it. yeah, he LAUGHT about it. Excuse me bitch but please turn your attention to the big monitor! LAUGHED. Stupid Spanish bitch.


You don't have anything to fear, Bitch. I'm not going to physically rape you because I don't roll that way. Will you get the worst beat down of your life? Most definitely!

Bitch Lucena Said:Obviously I'll try all the possible ways this to happen

Does this Spanish bitch have a speech impediment or something? It's either he can't speak correctly no matter how hard he tries or he's just hinting at him being gay again. I didn't show you the rest of the sentence because I didn't want all of your minds to be blown away from stupidity. He actually went in depth on how he wants me to rape him. I kid you not, this bitch is gay. Like I said, I will not rape you physically at least. I will beat you down within an inch of your life. I'm going to enjoy turning your face into a Spanish enchilada. and woah woah woah! Did he really say "THIS should not be seen in any way?" He believes that I'm some kind of rapist! The only rapist in the XWF Is...was Frodo Smackins but he's dead. I think. I'm going to beat a few lines of dialogue from Bitch Lucena's horrible "promo" prepare your brains.

Bitch Lucena Said:Or even more. If this guy not raped my as I think it's on his plans and he just end up beating me with some kind of voodoo magic or others inexplicable ways and ends being the United States Championship, in any way put the TV on the see this guy.

Does anyone else understand this Spanish bitches poor use of English? It's kind of hard to make out. But If I piece it together it seems as if he's trying to say that if I don't rape him I will end up beating him with some kind of Voodoo magic or other unexplainable ways and end up being the United States champion. First of all, who the fuck told this guy that I use Voodoo magic?! I'm a soldier from the future and just because I'm from the future he thinks that I can use some kind of Voodoo shit?! This bitch is representing Eli James in the first round? Well, Theo I hope the five people for round two will be ready because there is no way in hell this Spanish idiot is going to pin me. And just because he did a little promo with Sid Feder. Feder doesn't like anyone and he's only being buddies with you because you're acing me. Sid Feder is the biggest Bitch in the XWF! Maybe not as a big of a bitch as Peter Gilmour though. " " Finally! someone used something new! I applaud Sid Feder for thinking hard enough to come up with something new! Very moronic but new! Then they go over my lazily put together XWF website move list. I don't know why because the bitches who control the website are horrible at putting moves together. So, I hope you both had some fun making fun of that move list. So very clever. I don't think anyone would have thought of making fun of wrestling moves! Damn, Sid just needs to have a heart attack and die already because that would make the XWF a lot less frustrating. Seriously though, Sid... Just go die. You're not funny or entertaining.


I'm going to finish this up now. Bitch, if you want to win the united states championship then you have to at least know how to speak correct English you ignorant cunt. It doesn't matter that you are ineligible for the title because you're not going to be winning come pay per view time. I'm going to rip out your tongue and sell it the Asians because maybe they can have use of a Spanish tongue like that. Maybe they'll eat it I don't know. So, all I need to you to do is show up and allow me to beat you down. But of course if you want to lay down and let me pin you so you can still walk out of the building that is always an option. You are a bitch after all. Bitch.

BITCH LUCENA!
DOESN'T KNOW ENGLISH!