We open up on the calm sea waters.
The yacht, quiet.
The view, serene.
The setting sun lets hues of orange and red bounce on the chopping waves.
Anarchy, opens the most peaceful its ever been.
SYKE!
A METRIC TON OF FIREWORKS DO IRREPABLE DAMAGE TO NOT JUST THE OZONE LAYER BUT ALL SEA LIFE WITHIN 10 MILES!
The camera pans over bloodthirsty fans; going around the yacht before landing on Todd Moschitti and Bama T.
TODD: Bonjour à tous et bienvenue dans ANARCHY! En direct de la Côte d'Azur, en route vers les ides de mars ! Je suis Todd Moschitti!
BAMA: ... OH! And I'm Bama T! Sorry, Todd didn't understand a lick of what you were saying, keep forgetting your French Canadian.
TODD: Heh, been a while since I spoke it. Like wearing an old suit that doesn't fit well. Enough about me, Bama, tell the good people watching tonight what to expect.
BAMA: What to expect!? ANARCHY on the ocean is what you can expect! We got "Spoiled" Summer Page facing off with Ricky Goldhart! Justin York versus CYPH3R for a shot at the Revolution Championship! Them No Good Bastards get to claim dibs on a shot at the newly established Anarchy Tag Team titles with The Perfect Storm in their way! Marisol Vilaro faces off against Solomon Kline in a number one contenders match for the coveted Anarchy Championship. And Todd, how about you do the honors."
TODD: Oh merci! And out main event! X-Treme Champion Dominic Strife goes one-on-one against The Goddess Atara Raven! What a show in a beautiful location.
BAMA: Damn right, baby!
TODD: But first! Sir Lionel Pennyfarthing goes against The Tactilizing One! Larry Tact!
Sir Lionel Pennyfarthing strides out onto the ramp in full admiral regalia sporting a monocle and cane. He flourishes his mustache and snaps down on his cane as a live orchestra begins to play.
TODD: Oh my, it seems Sir Lionel has a performance to… erm… Perform!
BAMA: … The hell did that orchestra come from?
Pennyfarthing begins singing “Modern Major General” word for every other word, flubbing only several lines! Very impressive.
He makes his way down to the ring to the confusion and silence of all but two fans of wrestling AND theater!
He walks the steps, strides upon the apron before throwing a hand out to the crowd and entering the ring finishing the song with a fancy bow to a scattering of applause.
TODD: Well, that was interesting!
"In the Face of Evil" by Magic Sword reverberates over the PA. Row after row, aisle to aisle, fans rise from their seats throughout the arena and cheer, knowing one of their workhorses is about to appear!
As the second, third, and fourth chords of the theme reverberate, three spotlights shine down, one over another: A green circle, a gold triangle over it, and a crimson line intersecting the other two. On the Tron, his monikers cycle through one after another:
TACTILIZING ONE
GAME CHANGER
LIMIT BREAKER
From there, the beat triggers the house lights to illuminate the figure of Larry Tact standing on stage. He's looking down as he hones in for the battle ahead.
After a few seconds, Tact whips his head up and trudges to one side of the stage, firing up the fans by pointing towards different sections. He goes to the other side of the stage and beats his chest with a hand before opening his arms to the reaction of the crowd. "THIS IS YOUR SPOTLIGHT!" Larry bellows as the audience hoots and hollers back. He returns to center stage and points to either side of the crowd. The lights cut out except for green, gold, and crimson spotlights highlighting the audience in attendance. Larry makes his way down to the ring, pounding fists with some fans at ringside before hanging onto the middle rope and pulling himself up onto the apron.
Facing the stands, he opens his arms up and puffs his chest out to receive the feverish energy of his supporters. Wiping his boots on the apron, Tact proceeds into the ring. He climbs a turnbuckle and again holds his arms out. “BEST GAME WINS!!!” he exclaims to another pop before descending and making his final preparations for the match.
BAMA: I don’t wanna take sides here, baby, but I prefer Tact’s entrance.
TODD: Not a controversial take, Bama.
Larry paces in the corner making his pecs bounce as he stares a hole through Pennyfarthing who checks his fingernails. The referee forces Lionel to removes his pith helmet and also takes his cane much to the good sirs dismay.
TODD: I think Sir Lionel is a little disheartened that his costume is now incomplete.
BAMA: If I was Lionel, which thank the LORD I’m not, I’d be more worried about Larry making me sharkbait. What did he say again?
TODD: That Tact has erectile dysfunction?
BAMA: … I mean 1 in 4 men do suffer from it, Toddy, I don’t think it's a joking matter!
TODD: … 1 in 4?
SIR LIONEL PENNYFARTHING
- vs -
LARRY TACT
|
DING! DING! DING!
Larry hops out of the corner as Pennyfarthing steps out holding up a palm and takes to the center of the ring. A spotlight shines on him as he faces the audience.
BAMA: The hell did that spotlight come from!?
Lionel scans the fans as Tact slowly looks around and questions every life choice he’s made to get here.
SIR LIONEL PENNYFARTHING: “The sea…”
TODD: Oh god…
Lionel makes slow methodical paces as he clasps his hands behind his back.
SIR LIONEL PENNYFARTHING: “A canvas of endless blue, a mirror to the soul, a cradle of creation. It whispers secrets on the wind, secrets of ancient tides and forgotten shores. It is a place of both breathtaking beauty and terrifying power, a realm where the familiar bends and breaks, and the unknown beckons.”
Lionel reflects on himself.
SIR LIONEL PENNYFARTHING: “I have seen it roar, a furious beast of foam and thunder, its waves crashing against the cliffs like the end of the world. And I have seen it slumber, a gent-OH GOOD HEAVENS!!!”
Lionel’s lament is cut short as Larry Tact thankfully interrupts with the stiffest forearm anyone has ever seen to crack Lionel’s jaw!
Pennyfarthing reels falling to a knee and cowering; Tact, with a pop from the crowd, slaps the pomade out of Lionel’s facial hair before grabbing his wrist and nailing him with a ripcord knee strike to the chin!
Pennyfarthing placing a delicate wrist over his forehead as he overdramatically falls to the canvas and slurs his words in a concussed haze.
SIR LIONEL PENNYFARTHING: “Sir Webber, wot do u meen I’m not jellicle enuf? I can be a pretty kitty I promif!”
TODD: That strike from Tact sent Lionel back to London!
Larry drops to a knee before kissing his fist and grabbing a handful of Pennyfarthing’s hair and lets loose with blow after blow before forcing Lionel to his feet and dragging him to the center setting him up for a powerbomb.
Tact taunts to the crowd before pointing to port which the crowd responds with-
”TACTILIZING ONE!”
Then to the starboard.
”GAME CHANGER!”
And finally to the hard camera.
”GAME CHANGER!”
Larry hurls Pennyfarthing into the air!
TODD: STAR POWWEEEEEERRR!!!!
Lionel is broken in half with a Powerbomb Backstabber!
BAMA: Larry Tact did what London, Broadway and Bollywood couldn’t do and make Lionel Pennyfarthing a STAR!
Tact transitions neatly into a lackadaisical pin.
ONE!
TWO!!
THREE!!!
| WINNER VIA PINFALL - LARRY TACT! |
Tact’s music plays as he hops up barely breaking a sweat as the ref raises his hand in victory.
TODD: Dominating victory from Larry Tact! Pennyfarthing hooked off-stage handily by THE GAME CHANGER!
BAMA: Exit stage right, Lionel! Larry Tact just Spiderman: The Musical’d your ass!
Todd- And we’re back from commercial break, ready for our next contest.
BAMA- That's right and we have Goldheart already in the ring & Billy Blankenship on the outside.
Suddenly…
S&M By Rhianna will play throughout the arena as the crowd cheers while Summer walks down the aisle. Summer gets to the ring side and walks up the ring stairs. Summer looks out at the crowd and raises her arms out to the crowd as the crowd cheers louder. Summer turns her attention to inside the ring where she motions to the referee to open the bottom and middle ropes so they can enter. Summer walks over to the closest ring corner and climbs up to the middle turnbuckle.
Richard Powers is on the outside keeping a close eye on the action.
BAMA- Let’s get into the action.
SUMMER PAGE W/ RICHARD POWERS
- vs -
RICKY GOLDHART W/ BILLY B. BLANKENSHIP
|
DING DING DING
Summer rushes across the ring and is quickly sidestepped by Goldheart which bounces her off the top turnbuckle. On the rebound Goldheart floats her over with a back body drop.
Summer bounces back to her feet and gets taken right back down with a clothesline and then another.
TODD- Goldheart is prepared for Summer Page here tonight.
BAMA- Is he ever!
Summer climbs back to her feet and ducks another incoming clothesline and hits the ropes herself but Blankenship pulls the top rope down and Summer goes tumbling outside the ring.
Blankenship throws a couple cheap stomps before Powers runs him off and checks on his partner before helping her back into the ring.
TODD- Blankenship with the blindside, it tracks.
BAMA- Can you go tell him that for all of our entertainment?
Summer gets back into the ring and the two trade punches back and forth until she gets the upper hand and irish whips Goldheart into the ropes and delivers a beautiful high knee on the rebound which drops Goldheart to the canvas.
Summer goes to lock in the Perfect 10 (Figure 8) but Goldheart quickly scrambles out of it and rolls outside the ring to collect himself.
BAMA- Smart move there by Goldheart. Bought some time to recover and getting a quick pep talk.
Powers runs around the ring causing Blankenship to once again take off. Powers shoves Goldheart back into the ring.
Summer is awaiting him and throws a chick kick but it's ducked by Goldheart who takes her to the mat with a backbreaker. He makes a quick cover.
1..
2…
KICK OUT BY PAGE!!
TODD- Close call there! Goldheart took advantage of that time on the outside.
Goldheart locks in a headlock and is really grinding on the neck of Summer. With the crowd chanting she slowly makes it back to her feet and throws several elbows into his midsection which loosens the headlock and then she shoots him off into the ropes.
On the rebound Summer nails a beautiful timed chick kick which has Goldheart stunned. Summer delivers a beautiful snap suplex and bounces back to her feet. Once Goldheart makes it to his feet she hits the ropes and attempts another high knee but it is avoided. She hits the ropes again and this time hits a tilt a whirl russian leg sweep and makes a cover.
1..
2…
KICK OUT BY GOLDHEART!
TODD- Summer is really picking up steam here much to the delight of the fans
BAMA- I won’t argue.
Summer climbs to the top rope and is hyping up the fans who are firmly behind her. Goldheart makes it back to his feet and she leaps off and drills him with a tornado DDT, spiking him right on the top of his head.
Summer makes yet another cover.
1..
2…
3—
GOLDHEART GOT HIS HAND ON THE ROPE AT THE VEEEERY LAST SECOND!
TODD- Gorgeous tornado DDT there by Summer.
BAMA- A ring general move by Goldheart to save this match!
The crowd gasped as they thought the match was over right then and there.
Summer runs her hand through her hair in absolute disbelief before standing to her feet and pulling Goldheart off the ropes. She attempts to lock in her Perfect 10 but Blankenship jumps up on the apron and grabs her by the hair.
TODD- C’mon ref!!
Powers gets up on the apron and Blankenship looks like he saw a ghost. Powers clotheslines him out of his boots much to the delight of the XWF universe.
Goldheart rolls Summer up when she's least expecting it.
1..
2..
TODD- Blankenship is pulling out all the stops to give Goldheart the advantage here.
BAMA- You damn skippy he is!
Summer quickly gets to her feet and delivers a nasty knee to Goldheart before he can make it up to his feet and she locks in the Perfect 10 this time and has Goldheart writhing in pain.
Blankenship is trying to push the rope closer for him to grab but he is unable and taps out!!
TODD- Blankenship taps to the Perfect 10!!!!!
BAMA- The move is devastating, makes sense why she tried a few times to get it locked in.
| WINNER VIA SUBMISSION - "SPOILED" SUMMER PAGE! |
TODD: This next match up is one with a lot of bad blood! Cyph3R and Justin York have exchanged pretty strong verbal assaults against one another leading up to this contest.
BAMA: Hot words from two of the hottest young stars in the XWF today, baby!
TODD: Both men have made their intentions clear in recent weeks… they want to challenge Matthias Syn for the Revolution Championship. Tonight, one of these two will earn the opportunity to do just that!
One for the money rings throughout the arena as JY steps out from behind the curtain with a kings crown on. He stands center stage and takes in all of the boo’s before adjusting his crown with a smirk and heading down to the ring.
RING ANNOUNCER: INTROOODUUUUCINGGGG The One, The Only. He hails from TOOOROOONTOOO ONTARIOOOO CANADAAAAA, KING JUUUUUSTIIINNN YOOOOOORK!
York enters the ring and stand on the middle ropes and holds his crown high in the air while giving a death stare into the crowd.
CYPH3R walks out to the ramp, clad in ring gear matching that of Tamako Ito, who is proudly standing next to him. He smirks and drinks in the boos from the crowd as Linkin Park’s “LIES GREED MISERY” plays over the speakers. He looks at the crowd from underneath his hoodie, then whips the hood off as the chorus hits.
He confidently walks down the ramp, hand-in-hand with Tamako, who is beaming at the crowd despite their heat. They make their way to the apron and Tamako holds down the ropes for CYPH3R to enter. In the ring he slowly walks to the ropes and leans forward, looking out into the audience. Tamako claps furiously and then takes CYPH3R’s hoodie as he prepares for the match.
#1 Contender Match
The Revolution Championship
JUSTIN YORK
- vs -
CYPH3R
|
York is seen feigning a yawn as he stands in the corner. Cyph3r cracks his knuckles and leers back at his boss in PWV.
TODD: Neither man here what I would call a ‘fan favorite’, Bama.
BAMA: Well, neither are you Todd. I heard a fan ask what kind of car you drove here tonight so they could slash your tires!
York and Cyph3r cautiously approach one another as the crowd, all of whom have been partying al night, seem split on who to root for. York and Cyph3r each reach up to start a test of strength, their fingers barely touching, until York throws a boot to the belly of Cyph3r!
TODD: York knows a trick or two about a thing or two in that ring.
BAMA: Well, I’m hoping he doesn’t know too much, he thinks the boat we’re on might sink!
York, still holding one of Cyph3r’s hands, starts manipulating the joints in his hand!
BAMA: That’s vicious, attacking a man’s hand is so mean!
TODD: Bama, kicking people and grappling is mean.
BAMA: But that’s his hand, Todd!
As York torques on Cyph3r’s five digit finger fork, Cyph3r uses the other hand to throw a thumb to the eye of York!
TODD: That’s dirty!
BAMA: No, that’s a thumb to the eye, Todd!
The referee steps in to admonish Cyph3r, but he pushes the referee aside! A leg kick to York! A standing side kick to York! York reaches up and hits Cyph3r with a thumb to the eye of his own!
TODD: What’s good for the goose is good for the gander!
BAMA: Yeah, and even better for an optometrist! Any more and these guys will need lasik!
York hooks Cyph3r and brings him up vertically! KILLZONE!
TODD: Huge brainbuster from Justin York!
BAMA: CANADIAN brainbuster, Todd, that’s how they do a brainbuster from Saskatoon to Sudbury!
York goes for the cover!
1…
2…
Cyph3r kicks out! Undeterred, York begins grinding his forearm into the eyes and forehead of Cyph3r!
TODD: York has no problem getting dirty here, Bama!
BAMA: We’re in the Mediterranean, if we were stateside there’d be a 25% tariff on that Canadian dirt!
The referee gets York to break the face grind. York brings Cyph3r to his feet.
York with an echoing back chop to Cyph3r!
York whips Cyph3r into the ropes!
On the rebound, York dips to hit a back body drop!
NO! Cyph3r brings the foot up and kicks York in the jaw!
TODD: Cyph3r has some nasty tricks of his own!
BAMA: Robotic tricks! But this ain’t Battlebots, Todd!
York is reeling from the shot to the jaw, and Cyph3r follows up with Toxicity!
TODD: HE NEARLY DECAPITATED JUSTIN YORK WITH THAT KICK!
BAMA: Nearly, but Justin’s dentist is going to be pissed with all the teeth that just got knocked loose!
Cyph3r follows up with a cover!
1…
2…
2.9…
York gets the shoulder up!
Cyph3r looks at the referee, holding up three fingers, insisting that was a three count!
Cyph3r, frustrated, stands up and points at Tamako, his manager. She nods, and produces a conch shell! She tosses it to Cyph3r, then gets on the apron to distract the referee!
York slowly rises as Cyph3r prepares to dome him with the conch shell!
TODD: Oh my, Cyph3r is using a very thematic weapon!
BAMA: Maybe not!
Cyph3r goes to nail York, but York catches Cyph3r’s forearms, the pointed end of the shell nearly connecting with his forehead!
Cyph3r fidgets and struggles against the resistance, putting the pointed end into York’s mouth!
York, breathing heavily from the battle, exhales through the conch shell!
A loud, bellowing sound echoes across the boat as the fans go wild!
Suddenly, from the surrounding seas off the French riviera, the water churns.
https://images.stockcake.com/public/d/2/...ckcake.jpg
A massive Kraken emerges, terrifying some oddly placed Vikings who were having a nice boat outing, and latches onto the side of the massive yacht!
TODD: SWEET SCUNGILLI! THEY SUMMONED A LEVIATHAN!
BAMA: Somebody get a chef out here, we could have calamari for life!
The boat rocks as the fans scream in excitement! The Kraken is totally invested in who wins this match! Somewhere, we see The Bashmaster clapping for his new Kraken friend… he’s decided to name him Lord Squidlington the Third! He welcomes his new friend to enjoy the rest of the show.
York shoves Cyph3r away as the conch shell goes skyward! Both men make a move to catch it!
The two battle on, each trying to wrest the conch away!
Cyph3r catches the conch! As he does, several robots appear in the crowd, all doing the dance named after them while the Bashmaster is excited to watch all of this!
However, the referee, having had enough of the foreign object, snatches the conch away from Cyph3r!
TODD: The referee has had enough, he’s putting enough to the use of it!
BAMA: I haven’t seen that much shell violence since Mariokart!
York throws a right, but Cyph3r blocks it!
Cyph3r with a Boom, Headshot!
York drops to his knees!
Cyph3r winds up his left leg, and nails a huge kick to York’s chest!
Another kick from Cyph3r to York’s chest!
Cyph3r winds up, the Kraken, the robots, and the crowd all get into it!
Cyph3r lays a third foot into York! Cyph3r then runs back to a corner, then in charging at York, hits a Yakuza Kick!
BAMA: Cyph3r is enforcing his will on Justin York here in the mediterranean!
TODD: This might be over!
York is on his hands and knees, trying to get his bearings!
TODD: Cyph3r is signalling for the System Crash!
BAMA: Is it all over for York?
The fans all start screaming in unison!
Suddenly, inexplicably, throughout the PA system on the ship…
“Y’ALL ALREADY KNOW WHO IT IS, SO I’M NOT GONNA SAY IT!”
TODD: OH MY GOD!
BAMA: Y’ALL KNOW WHO IS HERE?!
Cyph3r turns and looks up the aisle to the entrance set up on the ship! He watches to see Y’all Know Who walk out!
The referee joins him, and watches as well!
After a moment, nobody comes out!
Cyph3r begins looking around the arena while the referee still watches the entrance!
York slowly gets to his feet, reaching into his tights!
Cyph3r turns is nailed with brass knuckles by York!
TODD: Justin York just hit Cyph3r with a loaded punch!
BAMA: York must have set the music up as a ruse!
The music fades as soon as Cyph3r hits the mat. York with a cover.
1…
TODD: What a shame, for the match to end like this!
BAMA: Cyph3r tried to cheat first with that conch, now he’s conked out!
2…
TODD: Justin York flagrantly cheated in front of us, the fans, that Kraken, the Bashmaster, and several robots!
BAMA: Yeah, just not in front of the referee!
3!
| WINNER VIA PINFALL - “KING” JUSTIN YORK! |
…after the match…
TODD: Oh my god, look! Jumping the guardrail!
BAMA: The Revolution Champion???
Syn hits the ring and clobbers York from behind while he's celebrating. He hits a SynTheory on York, and then lifts Cyph3R and hits a SynTheory on him too!
Syn puts a boot on Justin York’s back, and raises the Revolution championship in the air as the scene fades.
Fireworks burst all around the X-Tron!
Razor Blade comes out wearing his American Nightmare outfit. Blade lifts his arms in the air and fist pumps as the crowd cheers!
TODD: And here comes one-half of the American Storm, Razor Blade himself!
BAMA: The man, the myth, the icon Razor Blade! I know he's looking for a big win tonight to catapult his team into the tag team title mix!
“When Not Like Most Girls” hits. Latoya Hixx bursts onto the stage, spreading her arms wide open! Hixx walks straight down the ramp towards the ring!
TODD: And here comes his partner, Latoya Hixx! She's feisty and fierce, and tonight, she looks determined to walk away with a win!
BAMA: Razor and Latoya need to get some momentum back tonight, but it's not going to be easy, given who their opponents are!
TODD: Speak of the devils!
BAMA: Don't you mean- speak of the bastards!
The entirely epic XTron video of TNGB takes over the arena as the lights dim. A spotlight highlights the ramp, and Thunder Knuckles walks out onto the entrance ramp, hyped and ready to fight, pointing out into the crowd. Behind him, Bobby Bourbon deliberately walks out and stops, also pointing out into the crowd. Both men glance at each other and return their attention to the ring, delivering a no-look fistbump, then in unison point into the ring. The crowd sings along with the song.
*ASSHOLE, DIRTBAG, NO GOOD BASTARDS!*stomp stomp*
TK slides into the ring and gets up onto a knee, beckoning the crowd as Bobby climbs the steps and enters the ring behind him. TK stands and appeals to the crowd as Bobby raises his arms at 45-degree angles.
TODD: These two men are some of the most foul, disgusting cretins that have ever stepped foot into the XWF...and somehow, a lot of people love them for it!
BAMA: They're Bastards, Todd! But they're our Bastards! And tonight, they have a chance to win a shot at the Anarchy tag-team titles, you know they've been waiting for this moment ever since their re-union!
TODD: Well tonight we're going to find out if the T.N.G.B. of old is still as good as they ever were!
#1 Contenders Match
Anarchy Tag Championships
THEM NO GOOD BASTARDS
BOBBY BOURBON & THUNDER KNUCKLES
- vs -
THE AMERICAN STORM
LATOYA HIXX & RAZOR BLADE
|
DING! DING! DING!
The bell rings and Razor Blade is standing in the ring, waiting for Bobby and TK to decide on who should start the action. Eventually, Bobby gives in to TK's pestering and steps in to start the match. Bobby and Blade start the match off hot, with a fierce grapple that shows Bobby's overwhelming strength. After Blade realizes Bobby's immense power, Blade breaks off the grapple switches up his style. Razor Blade starts popping in and out of Bobby's range, hitting him with quick shots to the body and then getting back out of range. Bobby tries to land some heavy blows, but Blade is too quick and committed to his strategy. After a few minutes of action, Bobby's stomach is starting to bruise from the constant in-and-out body blows.
TODD: Razor Blade is coming at Bobby Bourbon with a new strategy tonight, and so far it's working!
BAMA: He's fighting like a pissant, Todd! Darting in and out like a ballerina!
TODD: But if it works, it works!
Bobby Bourbon starts trash talking Blade, trying to encourage the wrestler to grapple back up with him: but Razor Blade is too clever. Razor hits the ropes, bouncing off of them before leaving his feet for a dropkick that levels Bourbon. Blade quickly picks himself up, jumping off the ropes again before springboarding back to Bobby: but Bourbon is too quick! Bobby lifts his knees, and Blade's chest is turned damn near concave from the force of his rough landing!
BAMA: Bourbon's too smart of a veteran to stay down for long! If you give him even a second to recover, he's back to peak form- and Blade was way too slow with that springboard attempt!
TODD: Blade should've stuck to his original style, the high-flying risks were simply too great!
Razor Blade writhes around in agony in the ring, holding his chest in pain. Bobby Bourbon slowly works his way to his feet before walking over to Blade and curb stomping him repeatedly. Razor Blade tries to crawl away from the sudden onslaught, but Bobby grabs him by the leg and locks in a vicious ankle lock! Bobby looks like he's about to snap Razor's ankle clean off! The referee asks Razor if he wants to quit, but there's too much at stake, and Razor Blade just screams defiantly in his face!
BAMA: Bobby Bourbon has that submission locked in! If Razor Blade doesn't tap out, I think Bourbon might just rip his leg out of it's socket!
TODD: But Razor Blade isn't giving up, Bama! He's trying to make the tag!
Sure enough, Razor Blade is slowly crawling forward, desperately trying to reach Latoya Hixx, who is stretching her arm out from the corner as far as she possibly can. Bobby Bourbon tries to yank Razor Blade back to the center of the ring, but it's no use: the will of Razor Blade is too strong! Razor finally crawls towards his corner enough to reach Hixx's hand, and they make the tag just in time before Bobby drags Razor back to the center of the ring and begins reworking the ankle lock!
BAMA: I don't think Bourbon knows that a tag has been made!
TODD: He's too focused on ripping that poor sod's leg off! He has no idea Hixx is coming right for him!
As Bobby Bourbon works up a porous sweat working over Blade's Ankle, Latoya Hixx darts into the ring like a bat out of hell. She takes Bobby Bourbon out with a huge lariat that drops him to the mat, forcing him to release Razor Blade. Razor Blade rolls out of the ring, gripping his ankle in immense pain.
BAMA: Latoya Hixx means business tonight!
TODD: Bobby Bourbon took his eye off the ball, he had his eye on the ankle! And now, that might cost the Bastards!
Thunder Knuckles is screaming for a hot tag in the corner as Latoya Hixx takes Bobby Bourbon completely by surprise. Latoya begins taking Bourbon to task, delivering big blows to her downed opponent before picking him up by the scruff of his neck. Hixx delivers a devasting kick to Bobby's liver that forces him to keel over. Then, Hixx picks up Bourbon for a monstrous suplex that rattles the entire ring, and leaves the Anarchy audience in awe!
As Hixx continues her roll of dominance, she picks Bobby up before irish whipping him into a neutral corner. She then hits him with a splash in the corner, causing Bobby to stumble out in a daze. Latoya Hixx then charges towards the ropes, but when she hits the ropes, Thunder Knuckles yanks the back of her hair! Hixx immediately turns around and starts screaming at Thunder Knuckles, but the referee didn't see anything.
TODD: That bastard! He's not the legal man, and he just blatantly interferred!
BAMA: If the ref doesn't see it, it doesn't count! Them's the rules! Now are the American Storm just going to stand there and complain about it, or are they going to take back this match?!
As Latoya Hixx chastises Thunder Knuckles, Bobby Bourbon slowly regains his bearings. As he recovers, Bobby directs his gaze towards the corner with the commotion. Sensing an opportunity, Bobby charges ahead and hits a double-axe handle right to the back of Latoya's head! Latoya falls to the ground, and Bobby tags in a grinning TK. Bobby and TK begin delivering vicious stomps to Latoya Hixx as the referee screams at Bourbon to leave the ring. The bastards pick up Hixx and perform a double suplex before they finally listen to the referee's ruling.
TODD: Those Bastards! They don't give a damn about the rules! The American Storm had this upset in hand, and now TNGB's dirty tricks have completely turned the tables!
BAMA: They're called Bastards for a reason, Todd! You'd do well to remember that!
Hixx tries to fight back against Thunder Knuckles, but TK is too fresh and too clean. He delivers a few big shots to Hixx as she tries to stand back up, then he brings her back down to the mat with a vicious DDT that seems knock a few of Latoya's screws loose. Back outside the ring, Bobby Bourbon has left his corner and is making a beeline towards Razor Blade- who is still holding his leg in pain. Bobby takes a big swing at Razor, but the Blademan manages to stumble out of the way just in time. Bobby and Blade then begin grappling outside the ring, which eventually spills over the ringside barrier and into the stands!
Back inside the ring, Thunder Knuckles has taken advantage of the situation. As Latoya Hixx tries to climb back to her feet with the assistance of the ropes, TK comes charging in with a huge elbow to the head that sends Latoya Hixx spilling over onto the apron. As Hixx pulls herself up with the help of the ropes, TK grabs her head and positions it just beneath the top rope. Then, TK DDTs her once more back into the ring! After Hixx is back inside the ring, TK stands tall, surveying the scene and basking in the glow of the familiar spotlight.
TODD: Razor Blade might need to get back in that ring! Latoya Hixx is vulnerable here!
BAMA: Bourbon has Blade completely distracted! This has been a tag-team exhibition from the Bastard's so far tonight!
As Bobby and Blade continue trading blows in the audience, TK walks over to Hixx's leg before picking it up with a big smirk. TK then delivers his signature THUNDER STRIKE before covering Latoya for the pin!
1!
2!!
3!!!
| WINNER VIA PINFALL - BOBBY BOURBON & THUNDER KNUCKLES - THEM NO GOOD BASTARDS! |
As the bell rings, Bobby Bourbon slides back into the ring, seemingly having dispatched of Razor Blade. TK and Bourbon walk towards the center of the ring victoriously. The referee raises the Bastard's hands high into the sky as they earn their shot at the Anarchy tag-team championships.
BAMA: What a huge win tonight for the Bastards! With this impressive win over the American Storm, Them No Good Bastards have secured a guaranteed shot at the Anarchy tag-team titles! The Bastards have shown us tonight that they are back for real, just like they never left!
TODD: Impressive win?! They cheated every step of the way! If they had played within the rules, this would've been a completely different ballgame!
BAMA: It's just like I said, Todd! The Bastards are back, just like they never left!
The sythinzied beat of Shake it Off By Taylor Swift begins to play over the public address system, as the opening lyrics soon begin, as the fans boo and flashes going off, people are waiting for the arrival of the Fitness Queen herself.
I stay out too late
Got nothing in my brain
That's what people say, mm-mm
That's what people say, mm-mm
As a spotlight is on the entrance ramp and the lights dim, first stepping out is none other than the legendary Snarktopus Nessa Wall, who smiles brightly before trash talking the fans as she smiles, before ordering a couple of stage hands to come out they each have a mirror in hand they face the entrance ramp, as soon out from the back steps La Marvillosa herself Marisol Vilaro.
I go on too many dates
But I can't make 'em stay
At least that's what people say, mm-mm
That's what people say, mm-mm
Marisol stops to admire herself in each mirror posing and showing off, what her hard work has given her and mouthing about how she’s the inspiration these out-of-shape people need. After a few moments of posing she brushes right past, giving her manager/mentor a hug before they head off with Nessa leading the way taking the time to give the fans at ringside a hard time for even trying to touch them.
But I keep cruisin'
Can't stop, won't stop movin'
It's like I got this music in my mind
Sayin' it's gonna be alright
Marisol herself takes the time to pose some more showing off her muscle, and trying to sell them on the VilaroFit mission, and how they need it to improve themselves, As the devious duo soon make their way toward the ring side area Nessa soon goes up the ring steps and takes the time to bark orders at the referee, showing him exactly how lower the ropes for herself, and her client, after being lectured by the Ambitchous one, the referee complies doing it exactly as Nessa demanded enters the ring and motions for Marisol to go up the steps, as she climbs up the steps she takes each moment to keep shilling her products, which doesn’t endear her to the fans, as she soon enters the ring under the rope and soon she rudely brushes past the referee as Nessa presents her to the booing fans as she raises her arms high in the air soaking in the boos, and catcalls.
'Cause the players gonna play, play, play, play, play
And the haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate
Baby, I'm just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake
I shake it off, I shake it off (hoo-hoo-hoo)
Heartbreakers gonna break, break, break, break, break
And the fakers gonna fake, fake, fake, fake, fake
Baby, I'm just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake
I shake it off, I shake it off (hoo-hoo-hoo)
Marisol then does a series of poses once again before turning around and gracing the other side of the area raising her arms high in the air and then doing a similar series of poses showing off her physique and how in shape she is. While Nessa claps her client before they head into their corner, and Nessa is getting Marisol psyched and going over the game plan as they wait for the opponent to enter.
"Forgotten" by The Plot In You plays throughout the arena. The lights go out. Once the beat drops, a spotlight shines on the entryway, where SOLOMON KLINE appears inside the light, clad in a black hoodie over his ring gear and kneeling on his right knee. As the lyrics come in, he stands, removes his hood and surveys the crowd as sparks rain down around him. He grooves his way toward the ring, and high fives fans along the way. He circles the ring and slides under the bottom rope. He continues rocking out to the song and at the 1:50 mark, he goes to the turnbuckle with a primal scream as the lyrics say "I have spent my life chasing things that have only brought me pain. In the end when I'm dead, hope it was for something!"
#1 Contender Match
The Anarchy Championship
MARISOL VILARO
- vs -
SOLOMON KLINE
|
DING! DING! DING!
Todd: And we’re off! Ladies and gentlemen, all the marbles on the line here as we’re figuring out a number one contender for the Anarchy Championship, and I can’t wait to see what’s going to happen here!
Bama: Big fight feel here, baby! Both these guys have a point to prove! Marisol’s one-half of that power couple goin’ on with Gorgo right now and wants some gold for herself, and Kline? He just got OUT of Hell with Gorgo and Aurora and looked like a star during that match!
The two sides looked at each other, circling around the ring. The size difference between the two looks incredibly jarring up close as they come together, Kline looking for a sharp right hand that catches Vilaro on the side of her face. She has to back up from the punch, rubbing her face as she does so. Kline looks to follow up on that, but Vilaro bobs and weaves out of the way.
The two of them practically dance around the ring, Kline trying to push his advantage and getting the occasional hard strike in, while Vilaro keeps trying to prevent herself from taking too much damage. Marisol picks her moments wisely though, throwing some sharp kicks to Kline’s legs.
Todd: Marisol’s kicks are deadly, she doesn’t have the biggest repertoire with them, but she’s one of the most vicious when it comes to the power they can hold.
Bama: Ask anyone who’s taken a VilaroFit Facial and they’ll tell you the same, hoo baby!
Vilaro’s swiftness comes to an equally swift end however, as Kline positions himself to trap Vilaro against the corner. She tries to bob her way out again, but Kline grabs her by the sides and throws her right back into the corner! Her body crashes and collides against the metal of the turnbuckle, knocking the wind out of her sails!
And that’s all the opening Kline needs to move in! A HUGE lariat to the corner practically takes Marisol’s head off, and as she staggers out of the corner, Kline follows up by turning her around so that he can hit a HUGE GERMAN SUUUUUUUUUUUUUPLEX!
Todd: The power of Solomon Kline’s already something to praise in a vacuum, but in a match like this? He’s a full foot taller than Marisol and nearly a hundred pounds heavier! She’s like a ragdoll to him!
Kline goes to follow up and put some more pressure on his target, but Marisol takes matters into her own hands and rolls out of the ring to get a breather!
Bama: Yeah, smart from Marisol. Get some separation, take some deep breaths, ‘cause she’s sure gonna need ‘em in this match, baby!
Todd: She’s gotta be careful to not get herself counted out, though. With a title shot on the line for the Anarchy Championship, you’ve gotta do what you can to win.
Vilaro walks around ringside, brushing some of the sweat on her face while mouthing off to the ref telling her to get back into the ring. Kline scowls, but decides to roll out of the ring to keep bringing the fight. He stalks his prey as he walks along one of the other sides of the ring… before BREAKING OUT INTO A RUN TOWARDS MARISOL!
SPEAR TO MARISOL!
COUNTERED BY MARISOL GIVING KLINE A DDT RIGHT ONTO THE NEARBY RING POST!
Bama: If that didn’t give that boy a concussion, I dunno what will!
Todd: Look at Kline! He’s practically out of it right now! And Marisol is already rolling back into the middle of the ring!
Bama: Having to hold her back after hitting the post, though!
Marisol winces as she stands, gingerly placing a hand on her back. The referee quickly checks on her, but she waves him off, instead telling him to start the count! The ref looks at Kline for a moment and hesitates, but begins the count.
ONE!
TWO!
THREE!
FOUR!
Kline is only now starting to move!
Todd: Going to be a miracle if he makes it back to the ring at this rate!
FIVE!
SIX!
SEVEN!
Kline gets onto his knees, a thin trail of blood trickling out as he looks into the ring. Marisol sees Kline looking up, and urges the referee to count faster!
Bama: Marisol wants this match over and done with right now! Can’t say I blame her for being impatient, but…
EIGHT!
NINE!
TE- KLINE ROLLS INTO THE RING!
And as soon as he does, Marisol pounces right on top of him and starts putting the boots right to Kline’s back! She’s like a vulture trying to feast on the carcass!
Kline tries to power through and get right back to his feet, but Marisol knocks him loopy with an enzuigiri that cracks throughout the arena! Marisol takes the chance to follow up - swinging neck breaker!
With Kline down on the mat, Marisol grabs him by the wrist, placing her foot right on his jaw, and… lifts him up while stomping him right back down over and over again!
Todd: Bama, you mentioned it before, but there it is again! That’s the VilaroFit Facial in action!
Bama: Painful move with an even more painful name attached to it!
Marisol goes for the cover after bouncing Kline’s head off the mat!
OOOOOOOOONE!
TWOOOOOOOOO!
KLINE THROWS MARISOL HALFWAY ACROSS THE RING AS HE KICKS OUT!
Bama: Holy shi-
Todd: That raw power is insane! I think Marisol just made Solomon Kline mad!
Marisol’s slow to get back to her feet, having to hold the ropes for support, but she sees Solomon shaking out the cobwebs as she does so! She slowly walks forward, only for Kline to lunge forward with another lariat!
Marisol tries to get back up, but she gets caught on the chin with a SUPERKICK! That sends her sprawling back into the ropes, eyes looking up at the lights as she does so, but Kline’s still on top of her!
Irish Whip has Marisol running across the ring! On the rebound though, Kline leans over, hoisting up Marisol by the hips and into the air!
FOREARM TO THE SKULL KNOCKS MARISOL RIGHT BACK DOWN TO THE MAT!
Todd: Marisol’s chances at going for the Anarchy title might have just gone from Ashes to Ashes, like that forearm from Solomon Kline!
Bama: Kline’s lookin’ like a house on fire right now, baby! He’s unstoppable!
Kline now goes for the cover!
OOOOOOOOONE!
TWOOOOOOOOO!
VILARO GETS A FOOT ON THE BOTTOM ROPE!
Kline stares in disbelief! He grits his teeth in frustration, slapping his palm against the mat.
Todd: Solomon Kline looking a bit frustrated now!
Bama: He thought he had this match won! Keep your head in the game, baby!
Kline picks Vilaro up and gets her on her feet, before booting her in the gut and trying to hook his arms in! He lifts her up for a Vertebreaker -
NO! Vilaro tangles her legs in the ropes again! She’s trying to prevent Kline from getting her in position! Kline tugs and pulls, eventually bringing Vilaro off as he backs up several paces!
But that just allows Vilaro to flip out! She comes behind Kline, shoving him forward - RIGHT INTO THE REFEREE! The ref gets bumped towards the ropes, looking out as they’re rubbing their sore jaw from getting hit!
Kline instantly turns to a look of guilt as he tries to check on the ref… but that opens him up to a LOW BLOW FROM BEHIND!
Bama: I don’t think the Kline family name is gonna be continuing in XWF at that rate…
Todd: Unfortunately, I don’t think Marisol Vilaro particularly cares.
Marisol hooks the leg as she shouts for the ref to count!
OOOOOOOOONE!
TWOOOOOOOOO!
THREEEEEEEEE!
| WINNER VIA PINFALL - MARISOL VILARO! |
Close your eyes.. picture me.. What do you see?
I am only one person, with one mind, one soul, one heart.. but I have many faces.. Can you tell them apart?
Beware the Ides of March.
BAMA: And here we are at the main event, baby!
TODD: That’s right, Bama. We cap things off tonight with an XTreme championship title defense seeing the young champ Dom Strife taking on the wily, not to mention beautiful, veteran Atara Raven.
BAMA: Will Dom be able to resist her feminine wiles? Hell, will I?! We’re about to find out!
The honeyed rasp of Atara's voice blares over the boat's PA.
HELLO DOVES
The crowd pops and gets to their feet shouting in near total unison a single word.
OPA!
Ringside lights start to pulse in time with the music and multiple vertical streams of pyro erupt across the front of the boat. Strutting with purpose Atara emerges from the back taking spot centerstage atop the small ramp leading to the ring. Posing for the camera, a wink and kiss is given to the viewers at home.
Grunge walking to the ringsteps, she climbs and stops at the top to posture again for her adoring public. Hand on her hip, the Grecian moves to the middle of the apron to blows a final kiss to the camera and enters the ring through the middle rope.
The opening riff of AC/DC's "Shoot to Thrill" blares suddenly over the public announce speakers. The drums come crashing in, along with the rest of the instrumental section. Soon after, Dominick Strife steps out onto the stage, followed closely by his valet Isla Burke….and Madison Dyson?!
The trio walk down the ramp and up the nearside ring steps. Dominick holds the ropes for Isla to step into the ring and he follows after. Madison slides in under the bottom rope. The three of them look out to the crowd before striking a pose. After a few last minute words of advice, Isla wishes him luck and steps out of the ring. However, Madison lingers, much to Isla’s annoyance. She whispers something to Dom and the ref makes a “you can leave now” motion, with Madison flipping him off in kind before finally leaving the ring.
TODD: Well I guess it really is true, Madison Dyson seems to be representing Dom Strife.
BAMA: Yeah, but you know what they say, two’s company, three’s a crowd!
XWF XTreme Championship Match
DOM STRIFE©
- vs -
ATARA RAVEN
XTreme Rulz! |
The bell rings and the action starts. Dom and Atara start circling each other, with the veteran Atara going low. Dom deftly gets out of the way thought and gets behind Atara with a rear waist lock. Atara shoots an elbow back into Dom’s face, getting him to break the hold, before sweeping his legs and dropping a big elbow down on his sternum!
Atara snaps back up to her feet and works the crowd with a little belly dancing!
BAMA: Oh Atara, I don’t know that I’d take the kid lightly! He’s the champ for a reason!
TODD: And some would argue that reason is Madison Dyson!
Dom then gets to his feet and locks up with Atara. He pushes Atara into the corner using his superior strength, but the ref makes him break on a count of five. Dom shoots an elbow into Atara’s ribs before snap maring her out of the corner and nailing a drop kick to the back of her head as she’s seated on the canvas. Dom covers!
1….
2….NO! Atara kicks out!
BAMA: And Madison seems to be rummaging under the ring for…something!
Indeed she is, and she pulls out…a paddle?!
TODD: I’m told all the foreign objects are nautically themed tonight.
Madison slides the paddle into the ring and Dom picks it up. He considers it for a moment, like he’s debating whether or not he wants to use it. But, settle on using it he does, and he cracks it across Atara’s back as she rises to her feet!
BAMA: Xtreme rules baby!
Atara buckles and cries out in pain! She retreats to a corner and Dom raises the paddle above his head, but Atara kicks him in the gut and hits him with a sit out jaw breaker as a counter! Atara then takes hold of the paddle….and Madison shoots onto the ring apron! The ref moves to stop her but she continues to try to get in to her client. Meanwhile, Atara drills Dom with the paddle!
Madison gives up on trying to get into the ring. Isla calls out to her to grab another weapon and she searches around again under the ring finally pulling out….a life preserver? Nah, that won’t do. Madison tosses it aside and pulls out a rescue ring! She tosses it into the ring to Dominick.
Dominick just barely dodges another strike from the paddle and scoops up the ring to block with. After a couple blocked shots, Atara gives up on the paddle and tosses it aside. But Dom tries to clock Atara with the ring. Atara counters into a drop toe hold, sending the ring skittering under the ropes. Atara then takes hold of Dom’s leg and begins to stomp on it. Dom skitters away to the ropes and uses them to get to his feet, but Atara stays on him with a knife edged chop, followed by another, followed by…Madison reaching under the ropes and grabbing her foot!
TODD: Madison making her presence known here!
Atara looks at Madison, yelling at her for the distraction. The ref chides Madison as well as Madison tries to look innocent. This gives Dom a little time to recover and he shocks Atara with a backflip pele kick! Atara goes down and Dom grabs the paddle again, raising it high and bringing it down on her so hard it cracks in half! Atara cries out in pain and reaches for the ropes. But Dom just drags her back to the center of the ring and covers her…or so he thinks….because Atara instead surprises him with a small package!
1….
2….
3…NO! Dom barely escapes the surprise pin!
BAMA: A wily move from the Grecian Goddess!
Madison and Isla call out support to Dom from the outside. And Atara, despite surprising him with the pin, is moving slowly and favoring her back after that brutal paddle shot. Both competitors are now on their feet and Atara goes for another chop, but Dom blocks and counters with a chop of his own. Atara backs into the ropes and Dom irish whips her across the ring, nailing her with a back body drop on the rebound, which further injures Atara’s back. But Atara’s not done yet! When Dom approaches her, Atara nails Dom with THE PRIAPUS PUNCH! Dom goes down HARD!
Madison is immediately on the ring apron, screaming at the ref and demanding a disqualification. The ref goes to Atara and chastises her for the illegal move, making her back away from Dom. Madison tries to get in the ring again and the ref moves to intervene. Atara goes back on the attack, grappling Dom up and landing a picture perfect European uppercut on him! Dom falls into the corner. Madison returns to ringside looking pissed!
TODD: This fight continues on Bama, and at this point, I don’t believe there’s any type of clear favorite. Dom definitely has the numbers game working to his advantage, but Atara isn’t backing down!
The match continues, both Atara and Dom exchanging big moves and near falls. But being rallied by his corner is Dom Strife. Dyson and Isla both outside of the ring clapping for him.
Dom starts stomping his foot… and just as Atara stands…
SHOOT TO THRILL
NOOO ATARA IS GONNA DODGE IT!
BUT DYSON HAS HER LEG FROM THE OUTSIDE!!!!
ATTY KICKS HER OFF!!
SHOOT TO THRILL - - -
- -IS STILL AVOIDED!
TODD: Dyson pulling on Atty’s leg, made her turn in just the perfect way to avoid the kick!
Dom’s leg goes through the ropes!
He stumbles back into
THE JUDGEMENT FROM PARIS!!!
Atara covers!
1!
2!!
3!!!
| WINNER VIA PINFALL and NEW XTREME CHAMPION - ATARA RAVEN! |
TODD: Incredible contest!
BAMA: Don’t call it a comeback, baby! Atara Raven captures XWF gold for the first time since 2021!
TODD: She has certainly overcome all of the odds tonight! Take nothing away from Dom Strife, he came in here poised to make his first defense… but it might be said that he underestimated the veteran in Atara! And now, we wait to see who Atara will defend the gold against at Ides of March…
BAMA: Oh baby, just growing pains for Dom Strife! And Atara? Let’s just hope she doesn’t get ambushed backstage before the pay-per-view!
TODD: Well, that’s all the time we have for you tonight! Next stop on this party yacht? England… and the Ides of March!
HUGE thank you for everyone who wrote matches for this show
"King" Justin York
Bobby Bourbon
Charlie Nickles
Liam Desmond
Madison Dyson
???
Everyone who RPed
And YOU for reading |
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