TODD: "Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to another exciting edition of ANARCHY! We are live and packed to the rafters here at the Sioux Falls Arena in South Dakota, and tonight’s card is absolutely stacked!"

BAMA T: "That's right, Toddy! We’ve got some incredible matchups lined up tonight, and I can’t wait to see how it all unfolds!"

TODD: "Jett Sterling is set to make a huge decision retaining to the Revolution title. Will it be Spencer Adams or Mr. Oz who walks out of Anarchy with the championship?"

BAMA T: "And how about Cameron Parker taking on a literal gorilla in his debut? If he wins, he earns an Anarchy contract—if he loses—it's back to the indies!!"

TODD: "We also have a triple threat match: Matthias Synn, Sean Cameron, and Harmon Grayson Hays in a match where two newcomers look to make their mark, and a former Anarchy champion looks to regain his footing!"

BAMA T: "COCK AND GAUC, BABY—THE RETURN OF LOVERBOY TO THE BRAND HE SINGLE HANDEDLY REVIVED ALL THOSE YEARS AGO!”

TODD: “That’s right Bama. One-half principal owner of the XWF, “Loverboy” Vinnie Lane returns to Anarchy alongside Micheal Graves to face The American Storm, Razor Blade, and Latoya Hixx. As The American Storm look for a second chance in the title picture, it’ll be interesting to see how they fare against an oddball pairing of veterans."

BAMA T: "Plus, Jett Sterling has promised something special for tonight’s main event. We don’t know what he’s got up his sleeve, but you can bet it’s gonna be huge!"

TODD: "You bet—



The previously excited, cheering arena of Anarchy fans IMMEDIATELY become the loudest, angriest chorus boos!

TODD: Oh my! Business just picked up!”

BAMA T: “Ab-so-loot-lee, Toddy, baby! We’re about to be graced with the presence of the gen-yoo-ine King of the Midcarders!”

The curtains burst open!

And who stands atop the ramp…

But MARK FUCKING FLYNN!

Briefcase in hand!

Imagine the loudest screams of displeasure and profanity you’ve ever heard from a sold-out crowd.

Now, double it.

That’s so hard the good people of Sioux Falls, South Dakota are booing Mark Flynn.

Flynn taps his nose, waving like a homecoming queen, pleased as punch, as he walks down the ramp to the sound of public anguish at his presence!

TODD: “You may recall, dear viewer, that Mark Flynn constructed and opened an entire AMUSEMENT PARK this week just to mock Anarchy and its champions! Clearly, this batch of Anarchy fans really doesn’t appreciate Flynn’s actions and they’re letting him know loud and clear!”

BAMA T: “Yeah, yeah. Hey, Todd, gimme a pen, I’m a try and get Flynn to sign ol’ Sassafras…”

Flynn jogs up the steps, and walks toward the center of the ring…

He waves at the timekeeper to throw him a microphone.

…The timekeeper, wearing a Thursday Night Anarchy shirt… sneers and crosses his arms! He ain’t doing it!

The crowd cheers!

Some of them even start a TIME-KEE-PER! Chant!

TODD: “This might be the first time in Anarchy history that the crowd is on its feet for the Timekeeper!”

BAMA T: “He has a name, Todd!”

…

BAMA T: “And if I knew it off the top of my head, you would look DAMN foolish right now!”

Flynn snaps his fingers! 

He kicks the mat, like ‘drat!’

He even starts to dip his head under the ropes to exit the ring! The crowd cheers! There’s no way this is working!

TODD: “Is that really all it took to shut Mark Flynn up!”

…

Then, Mark Flynn dips his head back inside the ring.

…

And retrieves from behind his back…

His own microphone.

THE CROWD IS FURIOUSLY BOOING!

BAMA T: “Phew! Close call!”

Flynn lifts the microphone to his face…

The crowd starts trying to boo as loud as they can, to try and drown out the sound of Flynn’s voice!

Flynn swizzles the microphone beneath his chin, delighted by this.

The crowd starts another chant… 

CROWD: “SHUT! THE! FUCK! UP!” 

Clap

Clap

Clap-Clap-Clap

CROWD: “SHUT! THE! FUCK! UP!” 

Clap

Clap

Clap-Clap-Clap

Flynn raises a hand to the crowd, half-smiling. 

Flynn: “I know what’s happening here… I get it.” 

…

Flynn: “See, you’re so EXCITED to see an ACTUAL FUCKING WRESTLER ON ANARCHY…”

Loud boos!

Flynn chokes up on the mic to amplify his voice, and leans over the top rope at the crowd.

FLYNN: “YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW HOW TO ACT!”

CROWD: “BOOOOOOOOOOO!”

FLYNN: “YOU FUCKING YOKELS FROM SOUTH DAKOTA!”

FLYNN: THE WORST DAKOTA THERE IS… And that’s SAYING SOMETHING!

CROWD: “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

TODD: “The crowd clearly did not appreciate that! Clearly these South Dakotans do not cater to the idea that they are somehow lesser than North Dakota!”

BAMA T: “Or Dakota Fanning!”

Flynn cackles, as he leans over the ropes, looking down at the crowd.

FLYNN: “I can’t even blame you fucking bumpkins. You mouth-breathing troglodytes.”

FLYNN: “You don’t know how to respond to talent… Because you’ve NEVER SEEN IT BEFORE!”

FLYNN: “See, on WARFARE! THE ACTUAL FLAGSHIP OF THE XWF! We wrestle in CITIES! With PEOPLE IN THEM!”

“LOS ANGELES!”

“CHICAGO!”

“NEW YORK CITY, THE BIG APPLE!”

The crowd boos each city in turn!

Flynn sneers with sadistic glee as he points out at the crowd.

FLYNN: “Anarchy is the sideshow circus the XWF parades to keep MIDDLE AMERICA HAPPY!”

FLYNN: “Playing to crowds in the DOZENS!”

FLYNN: “WINTERSET, IOWA!”

FLYNN: “TEN SLEEP, WYOMING!”

…

FLYNN: “SIOUX FALLS, SOUTH DAKOTA!”

Flynn cackles at his own joke, as the crowd rains down hate!

FLYNN: “Towns that have more TUMBLEWEEDS than PEOPLE WITH FUCKING TASTE!”

…

Flynn sticks a finger in the air.

FLYNN: “Which is why you’ll tolerate the refuse! The scrapyard! The wrestlers that cling onto Thursday nights because they COULDN’T MAKE IT IN THE BIG LEAGUES!”

FLYNN: “The marginally talented!”

FLYNN: “The ME-DEE-OH-KUR!”

FLYNN: “The ROSTER of XWF ANARCHY!”

The crowd boos!

Flynn turns from facing the crowd to screaming up the ramp.

FLYNN: “THAT’S WHY I CAME HERE. So, you fucking LOSERS could walk down to the ramp and THANK ME PROFUSELY for keeping you employed!”

FLYNN: “Because if the XWF wasn’t making HAND-over-FIST money selling Mark Flynn matches on the A-show?”

FLYNN: “Why the FUCK would they let you FUCKING HACKS trade PISSPOOR WRISTHOLDS on NATIONAL TELEVISION!”

The crowd boos again! Some of them hold up Anarchy shirts and pro-Anarchy signs to the camera!

The crowd starts a booming “AN-AR-CHY! AN-AR-CHY!” chant!

Flynn ignores the crowd, pointing up the ramp.

FLYNN: “See… I’ve called Anarchy every name in the book. For YEARS!”

FLYNN: “I did BEFORE I won the Universal Title…”

FLYNN: “I did AFTER I won the Universal Title…”

FLYNN: “And FOR WEEKS! AS UNIVERSAL CHAMPION! I WAS THE ONLY REASON PEOPLE BOTHERED TO TUNE IN ON THURSDAY NIGHTS! To watch me BREAK THE LIMBS OF UNTALENTED LOSERS WITH ANARCHY CONTRACTS!”

CROWD: “Booooooooooooo!”

…

Flynn points down at the ring beneath his feet.

FLYNN: “And none of you spineless, craven shits. EVER did ANYTHING to shut me up.”

…

FLYNN: “So… FOR ONE NIGHT ONLY! I’m declaring the Mark Flynn OPEN CHALLENGE!”

FLYNN: “TONIGHT! You people get to watch a REAL FUCKING WRESTLER!”

FLYNN: “And get to prove, ONCE AND FOR ALL, that Anarchy is the CESSPOOL of wrestling! A VOID where TALENT CANNOT EXIST!”

FLYNN: “And that NO Anarchy wrestler belongs in the ring with me!”

FLYNN: “LET ALONE IN THE FUCKING MAIN EVENT!”

The crowd continues to boo relentlessly as Flynn drops the mic, and beckons with both hands over the top ropes for someone to come down the ramp and take him on!

TODD: “If it wasn’t clear before, I think we know who Flynn is trying to get under the skin of tonight!”

BAMA T: “Is it me?”

Flynn begs for it, stomping his feet, screaming for someone to come down here!

The crowd starts a chant…

For a very familiar name…



Huuuuuge pop from the crowd. The opening tell-tale guitar riff immediately catches Flynn’s attention as his head jerks towards the stage. Moments later and the Anarchy Champion himself, Sean Parker appears from behind the curtain and walks onto the stage, a look of determination on his face. Flynn looks like he’s ready for a fight too, beckoning Sean to come down to the ring. 

TODD: “Holy crap, Parker and Flynn, right here on Anarchy!”

BAMA T: “So it wasn’t me?”

The Sky Assassin doesn’t need a second invite as he sprints down to the ring but the second he slides into the ring, Flynn immediately rolls out of the other side, waving Parker off with a dismissing gesture. A loud chorus of boos once again emanates from the Sioux Falls locals in attendance. Sean picks up the microphone Flynn was using and leans over the top rope, pointing to Flynn.

SEAN: “Hey! Fanny Baws! Seeing as you like to run down Anarchy and you think you’re better than aw cunt on this roster, why don’t we put that theory to the test eh? Especially seeing as nae cunt answered yer daft wee challenge! How about we give everyone a sneak preview of Leap of Faith, huh? You and me! Right here, tonight!”

The fans go absolutely ballistic as Sean paces around the ring, buoying up the crowd with waves of his hands and nods of his head. The camera cuts to Mark Flynn who has a look of derision on his face as if to say “are you fucking kidding me?!”

SEAN: “What do you say, Sioux Falls?! You wanna see Mark fucking Flynn against Sean Parker, right here tonight?! Live on Anarchy?!”

Huuuuuuuge pop!

SEAN: “The people have spoken, Mark, they want to see it! So whaddya say? Bring out all the personalities! King of the Midcarders! Overrated! Free-Win! The Guy Who Pinned Tristan Slater! The Most Hated Man in XWF! Bring them all, mate! Or are you just what I thought you were after all? An over-the-hill, opportunistic cowardly bitch?!”

CROWD: “Ooooooohhhh!”

TODD: “Oh my God, Sean is now trying to get under Flynn’s skin with the mind games, Bama!”

BAMA T: “Looks like it’s working, Flynn looks ready to go now, baby!”

The camera cuts to Flynn on the stage and he looks like he’s about ready to run into the ring when another familiar voice booms throughout the Sioux Falls Arena.

FAMILIAR VOICE: “HOLD UP! HOLD UP, BABY! FLYNN! PARKER! HOLD YOUR HOUSES, BOYS!”

Everyone’s attention cuts to the Xtron where Anarchy General Manager, Jett Sterling can be seen.

JETT: “Flynn, you think you can come down here to Anarchy and run your mouth? Well, seeing as you’re here, you will be competing!”

The fans pop again but Jett holds his hand up.

JETT: “But not against Sean Parker, baby! Flynn, you’ll be competing later on tonight but seeing as you don’t think anyone on Anarchy can put on a decent main event, you might wanna stick around for this one! Because I’m stoked to announce that tonight’s secret main event will feature none other than the Anarchy Champion, the Sky Assassin, Sean Parker!”

More big cheers for the champion.

JETT: “And Sean, you will be defending the Anarchy Championship against none other than… the longest-reigning Anarchy Champion of all time, baby! EDWARD THE GREAT!!”

The crowd loses their shit at the announcement! Sean nods, a grin spreading across his face as he shuffles the Anarchy Championship on his shoulder.

TODD: “OH MY GOD! SEAN PARKER VERSUS EDWARD! FOR THE ANARCHY TITLE, BAMA!”

BAMA T: “Jett Sterling just pulled an ace out of his sleeve, baby! He actually brought EDWARD back!”

TODD: “Fans, don’t go anywhere, we’ll be right back after this commercial break!”

SPENCER ADAMS © or MR. OZ © JETT STERLING TO MAKE A DECISION AMIDST THE FALLOUT OF THE REVELRY!

We return to the Anarchy ring, where Jett Sterling is already standing, microphone in hand. The crowd on their feet and buzzing as Jett prepares to address them.

Jett Sterling: "Now, I know there's been a lot of chatter and controversy following the events of The Revelry, specifically regarding the Revolution Championship match between Spencer Adams and John Black. Many of you witnessed what went down, and there’s been a lot of confusion about the role Mr. Oz played and the exact stipulations of his future shot."

The crowd murmurs and some outright boo as Jett continues.

Jett Sterling: "To clarify, when Mr. Oz was awarded a future shot at the title, the intention was to book a match at a later date, not for him to use it as a 24/7 briefcase or something. However, the events that unfolded at The Revelry left a lot of questions unanswered, and I’m here to set the record straight."

Suddenly, Spencer Adams' music hits, and the crowd erupts.



Spencer walks out from the backstage area, visibly upset, and heads straight to the ring.

Todd: "Here comes Spencer Adams! He's not going to let this controversy slide without having his say!"

Bama T: “Oh now, he’s just being a sore loser! If you ask me, Oz had a shot whenever he wanted it, and he was deemed an official-official during the Revelry! CASE CLOSED, BABY—OZ IS THE CHAMPION!”

Spencer slides into the ring and snatches the microphone from Jett.

Spencer Adams: "Jett, I'm glad you're out here clearing things up, but we need more than words. What happened at The Revelry was a load. I beat John Black, clearly beyond the point of dispute. Last I checked, Oz was ref for that match, not whatever the Hell he thinks he was doing after.

The crowd cheers in support of Spencer.

Jett Sterling: "Spencer, I hear you loud and clear, and trust me, I understand your frustration. That’s why tonight, we’re going to—"

Suddenly Oz’s music hits and the crowd begins to boo.



Oz steps out to the ramp with the Revolution championship around his waist and a microphone in hand.

Oz: “Listen, listen, listen. How many times have I been guaranteed shot after shot and then it gets thrown by the wayside? It seems like every time I win one. So, I took it into my own hands. I wasn’t going to stand by and let another shot slip by because someone won theirs, and it’s like I have to go back of the line yet again. I wasn’t having it. So, since I was granted the power of a referee, I said to myself ‘Hey, might as well make it official while I am one’ and voila. So if you aren’t here to make it official that I’m the Revolution Champion, then why should anyone care about this? Because we all know that I am the reason why Anarchy gets big ratings, even more when I am a champion.”

Jett Sterling: “Oz, I understand your point of view, but your title shot wasn’t a cash-in deal where you could claim it whenever you wanted. You needed clearance, and even if you had it, no referee can count their own pinfall in any match, much less for a title—that’s simply not how it works!”

Oz’s face twists with anger as he grips the microphone tightly.

Oz: “So what you’re saying is that despite all the times I’ve been overlooked and screwed over, when the opportunity arises for me to take what’s rightfully mine, suddenly Anarchy is all about rule and order? I’ll tell you what, Jett; if you want this title, you all will have to pry it out of my cold dead hands before I’ll ever give it up!”

The crowd's reaction is mixed. Jett takes a step back, intimidated by Oz.

Before Jett can respond, Spencer Adams snatches the microphone away from Jett, to a huge pop!

Spencer Adams: “That’s fine by me, Oz. You can PRETEND to be champion all you want, but if Jett really wants to clear this up once and for all, he’ll book you and me for the Revolution championship next Anarchy. Let’s settle this in the ring, where your big ass always falls short!”

Oz’s eyes widen in fury and he starts to protest, but Jett quickly intervenes, taking the microphone back from Spencer.

Jett Sterling: “You know what Spencer? That’s a fantastic idea! Oz, you want to prove that you deserve to be the Revolution Champion, then you’ll face the man recognized as the rightful holder to that belt! Champion versus Champion, and when the dust settles, there can be only one—REVOLUTION CHAMPION!

It’s official, next Anarchy—

SPENCER ADAMS © - vs - OZ © CAGE MATCH FOR THE REVOLUTION CHAMPIONSHIP

—That way there’s no shenanigans to call into question the result!”

Oz's face fills with rage as he stands on the stage ramp, pointing a finger accusingly towards the ring.

Oz: "You want to put me in a cage like an animal? Fine! But mark my words, Jett, when that door closes, Spencer Adams will regret ever challenging me for MY title! I’ll make sure to squash out ANY doubt about who the real Revolution Champion is!"

Spencer Adams leans over the ropes ready to fight.

Spencer Adams: "Bring it on, Oz, but once we’re locked in that cage, I’ll prove to everyone that you’re nothing but a pretender to my throne!"

Oz and Spencer mean mug as the camera cuts back to Todd and Bama T at ringside.

TODD: "Did you hear that, Bama? Next week on Anarchy, we’re going to witness Spencer Adams and Oz, locked inside a steel cage with the Revolution Championship on the line!"

BAMA T: "Oh, baby! I can’t wait! You know what else I can’t wait for?"

Todd: “What’s that?”

BAMA T: “So see my boy Hank squash Cameron Parker and send him back to wrangling buggies at his local Target, baby!”

TODD: “Well, questionable statements aside, you’re going to have to—e need to take a break!”







The Raising Fighting Spirit plays over the speakers!

The X-Tron lights up with the words The Fighting Spirit

Cameron Parker bursts out the curtain, all hyped up with a smile on his face!

He looks out towards the fans and then starts running down the ramp with enthusiasm, giving as many fans as he can a high five before walking up the steel steps!

TODD: The pride and joy of Warner Robins, Georgia! Cameron Parker is here to make his dreams come true and earn an XWF contract!

BAMA T: Sho ‘nuff, he seems like a nice kid, Toddy boy! But it takes more than a can-do attitude to run those ropes! It takes grit! It takes gumption!

TODD: Well Parker’s here tonight to prove he has both in spades! And if he can pull off the win, he’ll earn himself what the entire wrestling world dreams of… A Contract to wrestle on Anarchy!

Cameron steps inside of the ring and goes to the left side and climbs up the turnbuckle to raise one finger in the air!

Parker leaps down and walks toward his corner, waiting for the match to start.




The opening horn salvo from Gorilla dominates the air as the Gorilla wanders out curiously onto the stage, looking around in awe at the crowd and the ring. Its gaze narrows as it recognizes the ring in front of him. "Precious" Percival Penniworth IV walks out, proud of his noble beast companion. The gorilla gets into the ring.

TODD: The Gorilla is a stiff test for any Anarchy star, Bama! He’s logged victories over both XWF Legend Unknown Soldier AND one of the most dominant athletes in Anarchy history, Harmon Grayson Hayes!

BAMA T: True as the color blue, Toddy! The Gorilla’s a killa! Jett Sterling did not give Cameron an easy job tonight!

The competitors meet!

The official signals to the timekeeper!

DING DING!

CAMERON PARKER - vs - A LITERAL GORILLA SINGLES! IF CAMERON CAN BEAT THE GREAT APE—HE EARNS AN ANARCHY CONTRACT!

The moment the bell rings, the Gorilla springs forward! HE SLAMS HIS FISTS DOWN ON THE MAT!

But Parker narrowly side-rolls out of harm’s way!

BAMA T: Daggum, Todd! That Parker boy is quick as a hiccup!

TODD: Great quickness from Cameron Parker!

The Gorilla continues his opening offensive assault with a sweep backfist…

But Cameron ducks under the blow…

TODD: The Gorilla’s left an opening!

Cameron reaches forward!

Wraps his hands the gorilla by the back of the neck!

Then rolls backwards, launching the Gorilla into the air!

MONKEY FLIP!

The Gorilla sails in a perfect circular arc, before landing flat on his skull!

TODD: Cameron Parker just monkey-flipped the Gorilla!

The Gorilla quickly scrambles to his feet, pointing and shrieking at Parker!

Parker raises his arms, bending his knees, ready for another attack from his primate opponent!

The Gorilla charges AND LAUNCHES HIS WHOLE BODY!

DROPKICK!

But Parker masterfully sidesteps! The Gorilla eats mat!

TODD: Cameron Parker showing a lot of technical skill in the ring! Using his intellectual advantage to reverse the Gorilla’s constant attacks against him! Like a bullfighter!

The Gorilla comes up, woozily shaking his head…

When Parker springs up off the bottom rope!

AND DELIVERS A HURRICANRANA TO THE GORILLA!

The Gorilla skids across the mat, landing in the corner!

BAMA T: Hot damn, does that happen at bullfights? I gotta watch more of those!

The Gorilla comes off the mat is looking very flustered, as he backs into the corner…

Parker lifts one finger in the air!

The Crowd cheers!

TODD: Wow! It’s his first match and Cameron Parker has this crowd eating out of the palm of his hand!

Cameron charges…

…

WHAM!

RISING SPIRIT (Helluva Kick) straight into the Gorilla’s grill!

The Gorilla ooks…

And falls over onto his back!

TODD: DO IT, KID! IT’S YOURS!

Parker excitedly hooks the leg!

The official counts as the crowd screams!

ONE!

TWO!

THREEEEEEEEEEE!

WINNER AND NEW ANARCHY WRESTLER: CAMERON PARKER!

Parker comes up, and falls on his knees, elated! Looking like he just won the SuperBowl!

The crowd screams his name! Parker leaps onto the turnbuckle, waving to the crowd, who are so fucking amped this kid is getting to live his dream!

BAMA T: Welp. I gotta admit, I started off hoping to see a gorilla tearing a man limb from limb. But, this is fine, too, I reckon. Cameron Parker came out here like a man on a mission! He beat the Gorilla and earned his Anarchy contract!

TODD: But even more, Bama! With his performance tonight, Parker won the admiration of the XWF Universe! He’s still a rookie and the road only gets harder from here! But tonight, the future looks bright for Cameron Parker!


TODD: "Ladies and gentlemen, earlier tonight, it was announced that Sean Parker will defend his Anarchy Championship against the longest reigning Anarchy champion in the history of the brand—EDWARD. I'm getting word that we're ready to hear from 'the King of The Jungle' now!"

Suddenly, the Xtron cut to a live feed backstage, where we find—






























































"Ook! Ook Ook!"

TODD: "NO WAY! THAT'S NOT EDWARD! THAT'S A LITERAL GORILLA! IS THE GORILLA CHALLENGING FOR THE ANARCHY TITLE TONIGHT!? DID JETT SWERVE US ALL!?"

BAMA T: "I DON'T THINK ANYONE SAW THIS COMING, BABY!"

"Ook Ook, Ook, Ook Ook Ook, OOK!"

The gorilla steps out of the shot to reveal an equally massive MAN standing behind him.























"THANK YOU FOR SUCH HONORABLE INTRODUCTION, MY APE FRIEND—BUT EDWARD NOT NEED INTRODUCTION.

TRIBE, REJOICE! EDWARD RETURN!"

A production assistant is snatched up by the gorilla and forced to bow before EDWARD THE GREAT. EDWARD acknowledges the show of respect but ignores the ape's role in it.

The production assistant, wide-eyed and bewildered, looks around nervously. He tries to stand up, but the gorilla's firm grip keeps him in place.

"YOU, BRAVE TRIBESMAN, WHAT IS NAME?"

"Uh, J-Jason, sir," he says, glancing nervously at the gorilla.

"JASON! A STRONG NAME FOR A STRONG MEMBER OF TRIBE! EDWARD APPRECIATE JASON SERVICE TO ANARCHY! YOU HELP KEEP TRIBE SAFE, KEEP TRIBE STRONG!"

"Th-thank you, Mr. Edward, can I, uh, get up now?"

EDWARD nods. "YES, JASON. RISE, STAND PROUD. YOU PART OF TRIBE. YOU IMPORTANT."

The gorilla releases Jason, who quickly scrambles to his feet, straightening his clothes and taking a step back, eager to get away.

"JASON, YOU SEE SKY MAN?" EDWARD asks, oblivious to Jason's discomfort. "YOU SEE HOW HE FIGHT?"

"Uh, y-yes, I see him," Jason replies, trying to edge away. "He's, um, really good...or bad if you're not a fan."

"GOOD, YES. BUT EDWARD WONDER IF SKY MAN STRONG ENOUGH TO LEAD TRIBE," EDWARD says thoughtfully, stroking his chin. "EDWARD WILL TEST HIM TONIGHT. EDWARD WILL SEE IF SKY MAN WORTHY."

"Sounds, uh, great. I'll be watching. From, um, far away."

"GOOD!" EDWARD exclaims, slapping Jason on the back. "JASON, YOU GOOD TRIBESMAN. KEEP WATCH, KEEP SAFE."

Jason stumbles slightly but manages to regain his balance. "Th-thank you, Mr. Edward. I'll, uh, go do that right now!"

"GO WITH HONOR, JASON! AND REMEMBER, EDWARD ALWAYS WATCHING."

Jason quickly scurries away, glancing back over his shoulder as he does. The gorilla grunts approvingly, and EDWARD turns back to the camera, his face more serious than before.

"NOW, SKY MAN, EDWARD HAVE MESSAGE FOR YOU."

"LONG AGO, AFTER ANARCHY TITLE REIGN THAT BREAK ALL RECORD, EDWARD FINALLY ENCOUNTER WARRIOR WHO BRAVE, STRONG, AND FIERCE. THAT WARRIOR DEFEAT EDWARD FOR SHINY. THAT WARRIOR CENTURION. EDWARD FEEL LIKE TRIBE IN SAFE HANDS, SO EDWARD TAKE OPPORTUNITY TO RETURN HOME.

BUT CENTURION NOT AS STRONG AS EDWARD THINK. QUICKLY LOSE SHINY TO SKY MAN, AND UNABLE TO GET BACK BECAUSE HIM DISTRACTED BY WOMAN WITH MEAN WORDS. 

SO EDWARD WATCH SKY MAN DEFEND SHINY AND FIGHT IN MANY MATCHES. SEAN THINK HE STRONG. FAN THINK SO TOO. BUT EDWARD SEE FLAW. EDWARD SEE WEAKNESS.

SEAN WIN ANARCHY TITLE, BUT NOT WITHOUT HELP. SEAN RELY ON WOMAN WITH MEAN WORDS CUNNING AND SKILL, RELY ON LUCK AND DISTRACTION TO WIN SHINY IN END. SEAN THINK HE EARN TITLE, BUT EDWARD SEE TRUTH. IF WOMAN WITH MEAN WORDS NOT SUCH STRONG WARRIOR, EDWARD NOT SURE SKY MAN WOULD HAVE SHINY AT ALL.

EDWARD SIMPLY NOT CONVINCED SKY MAN STRONG ENOUGH TO HOLD SHINY OR PROTECT TRIBE.

EDWARD SEE YOU STRUGGLE WITH BOURBON AND MAN OF SYNN. EDWARD WATCH YOU FALL PREY TO PARIAH.

EDWARD RESPECT SKY MAN STORY. RESPECT FIGHT TO WALK. TO TEST MIGHT AGAINST OTHER WARRIOR ONCE MORE. BUT RESPECT NOT MEAN EDWARD THINK SKY MAN READY TO LEAD TRIBE. NOT UNTIL FACE TRUE TEST. 

FACE EDWARD!

EDWARD RETURN TO SHOW SKY MAN TRUE STRENGTH. TONIGHT, EDWARD TEST SKY MAN. PUSH BEYOND LIMITS. SEE IF CAN SURVIVE.

IF SO—PROVE EDWARD WRONG—PROVE STRONG LEADER—PROVE TRIBE SAFE FROM THREATS OF WOMAN OF MEAN WORDS OR TRICKY PARIAH OR ANY OTHER HYENAS LAYING IN WAIT, READY TO PICK MEAT FROM TRIBES BONE.

IN EDWARD TIME, EDWARD PUSH BACK THREAT OF WITCHY LACKLAND, DRUNKEN OLD-MOTHER, MIND MASTER, AND LEAST OF ALL, FAKE MUSCLE.

EDWARD WIN SHINY FROM FAKE MUSCLE. EDWARD KEEP SHINY WHEN FAKE MUSCLE TRY TO GET BACK. FAKE MUSCLE EARN NAME BECAUSE—ONLY LOOK STRONG—NO WARRIOR SPIRIT BEHIND MUSCLE. SKY MAN KNOW THIS NOW. SKY MAN KNOW HOW WEAK FAKE MUSCLE BE. SKY MAN KNOW—BEATING FAKE MUSCLE NO MAKE YOU WARRIOR—BUT BEATING EDWARD DO!

TONIGHT—UNDER THE STARS OF SIOUX FALLS... Uh..." (EDWARD quickly checks the gibberish scrawled on his forearm) "SOUTH DAKOTA—SKY MAN HAVE OPPORTUNITY TO PUT TO REST ANY DOUBT TO IF HE STRONG WARRIOR. BRAVE LEADER. FIERCE CHAMPION. BECAUSE TONIGHT, SKY MAN STEP INTO RING WITH THE STRONGEST WARRIOR—AND LONGEST REIGNING LEADER OF ANARCHY IN HISTORY.

EDWARD READY TO FIGHT. EDWARD MISS THE WEIGHT OF SHINY IN HAND, AND WEIGHT OF TRIBE ON SHOULDERS. TRIBE EVERYTHING TO EDWARD. EDWARD WILLING TO FIGHT TO DEATH TO PROTECT TRIBE. THAT INCLUDE FROM WELL-MEANING PUP WHO NOT YET LEARN PATIENCE AND WISDOM. SKY MAN QUICK TO ACT WITHOUT THINKING, LIKE WHEN FACE TRICKY PARIAH. ONE MISSTEP LIKE THAT WHEN SHINY ON LINE—LEAD TO BAD TIME FOR ALL OF TRIBE.

SKY MAN KNOWN FOR LAUGHING IN THE FACE OF ANY WHO DOUBT HIM. HE FLY HIGH. HIT HARD. PROVE WORTH. COME THEN—LAUGH IN EDWARD FACE. STAND IN EDWARD SHADOW AND PROVE YOU BIGGER. PROVE TO EDWARD YOU STRONG ENOUGH TO WEAR EDWARD CROWN. BRAVE ENOUGH TO PROTECT EDWARD TRIBE. WISE ENOUGH TO FIND EDWARD WEAKNESS—THEN USE TO LEVEL PLAYING FIELD AGAINST FIERCER PREDATOR."

"TONIGHT, SKY MAN, WE FIGHT. WE TEST STRENGTH. WE TEST SPIRIT. AND WHEN DUST SETTLE, TRIBE WILL SEE WHO TRUE LEADER BE. PREPARE YOURSELF, SKY MAN. FOR TONIGHT, EDWARD BRING HUNT TO YOU."

The tron fades to black.

MATTHIAS SYNN - vs - SEAN CAMERON - vs - HARMON GRAYSON HAYS SINGLES!

The opening riff of The hangman's body count by Volbeat starts to play throughout the arena as the lights dim. Several red and purple laser lights envelope the stage as Matthias Syn casually walks through the curtain. As he steps onto the stage, he stops and acknowledges the crowd by stretching both arms forward while touching his balled up fists together. After several seconds he begins to nonchalantly walk down the ramp towards the ring, not allowing the fans to touch him. He slides under the bottom rope, jumps to his feet and poses on the ropes. As he drops down from the ropes he takes off his red leather shearling coat, hands it to the ring girl and sits on the middle turnbuckle awaiting his opponent.



As Rebel Rouser begins to play throughout the arena, Sean Cameron walks out onto the stage wearing a turban, a kimono, and a kilt over his plain navy blue trunks, proudly waving the Romanian flag. He walks proudly down to the ring in what he believes to be traditional Romanian garb. Once in the ring, he removes the turban and throws it out into the crowd. He removes the kimono and throws it out into the crowd. He removes the kilt and throws it into the crowd. He hurls the Romanian flag, pole and all, into the crowd. He keeps his trunks and boots on.



The arena lights dim and the opening bars of HGH's theme blares through the speakers, drawing a chorus of boos from the crowd.

Suddenly, the spotlight hits the entrance ramp as HGH steps out. He pauses at the top of the ramp, soaking in the chorus of disapproval with a smirk. Slowly, he begins his strut down the aisle, occasionally stopping to mockingly blow kisses or mouth off with fans.

As he reaches ringside, HGH climbs the steps with an air of entitlement, wiping his feet on the apron and stepping through the ropes.

The bell rings, and the match begins!

Immediately, Sean Cameron charges at HGH and nails him with a flurry of punches, driving him back into the corner. Cameron then lifts HGH and slams him down with a spinebuster.

TODD: Cameron is wasting no time going after HGH!

Cameron moves to capitalize, but Matthias Syn sneaks up behind him and delivers a reverse STO into the middle turnbuckle, smashing Cameron's head against the pad.

BAMA T: Daggum it! He forgot it was a three-way, baby!

Syn turns his focus to HGH, who is struggling to his feet. Syn measures him carefully before delivering a vicious superkick right to HGH's jaw. 

HGH staggers but remains upright. 

Syn quickly follows up with a running somersault neckbreaker, sending HGH crashing to the mat.

TODD: Syn is absolutely dismantling his opponents with surgical precision in these opening moments!

Syn climbs the turnbuckle with his eyes locked on Cameron, who is just beginning to rise to his feet. Syn leaps off and nails a diving crossbody, flattening Cameron once again. Cameron writhes in pain, gasping for air.

Syn pulls HGH to his feet, but HGH throws a desperate punch that catches Syn off guard.

TODD: HGH is fighting back!

HGH lands another punch, and another, before whipping Syn into the ropes. 

As Syn rebounds, HGH catches him with a big clothesline, knocking him to the mat. 

HGH quickly follows up with a spinebuster of his own, spiking Syn into the canvas.

BAMA T: Deafening impact from HGH, baby!

With Syn down, HGH turns his attention to Cameron, who is using the ropes to get back to his feet. HGH charges and nails Cameron with a hard shoulder tackle, sending him crashing back into the turnbuckles. HGH doesn't let up, stomping away at Cameron in the corner.

TODD: HGH has fully taken control of this match!

But Syn doesn't stay down for long. He rolls out of the ring to catch his breath and regain his composure.

HGH lifts Cameron to his feet and sets him up for the Injection Shot. 

TODD: HGH is looking to finish this one!

However, before he can execute it, Syn slides back into the ring and clips HGH's knee from behind, causing him to drop Cameron and collapse to one knee.

BAMA T: NOT SO FAST, BABY!!

Syn quickly grabs HGH and nails him with a swinging neckbreaker. HGH rolls out of the ring, clutching his neck. Syn then focuses on Cameron, who is still dazed. He drags Cameron to the center of the ring and sets him up for the SYNthesis.

TODD: Now it's Matthias Syn who is looking to finish this!

Syn executes the swinging reverse cutter perfectly, planting Cameron face first into the mat. Without wasting a second, Syn locks in the SYNTheory arm trap triangle choke. Cameron struggles, trying to reach the ropes, but Syn's hold is too tight and he is positioned too far away.

BAMA T: Cameron is trapped in the SYNTheory!

HGH tries to re-enter the ring, but he's too slow. Cameron has no choice but to tap out.

TODD: Cameron taps! It's over!

The referee calls for the bell, and Syn releases the hold.

WINNER: "Syn City Saint" Matthias Syn!

TODD: What a dominant performance by Matthias Syn! He made quick work of both Parker and HGH tonight!

BAMA T: I see BIG things in his future, baby!


TODD: I'm getting word that we're ready to hear from the champion!

A darkened room. A light sways back and forth, metronomesque. Five pictures pinned to the back wall, the faces on them concealed.

“183 days and counting.”

I walk into view of the camera. By my waist hangs a katana, sheathed in its scabbard or saya.

“That’s how long I’ve been Anarchy Champion. Four successful defenses. Another seventeen days and I equal your record, Edward, becoming the greatest Anarchy Champion of all time. Solidifying my place in XWF history. But I haven’t gotten this far alone.”

My eyes veer down to the weapon at my side. My hand affectionately travels up and down it.

“This is Masamune. Beautiful, isn’t she? 753 years ago since she was forged by her namesake. Still just as sharp and deadly as she was then.”

My fingers coil around the saya. My thumb pushes the guard, releasing Masamune from the koiguchi, the saya’s mouth.

“So many have tasted her blade since I became champion.”

The first picture becomes visible, showing a familiar face. A confident blonde woman. In one fluid movement, Masamune slices across the photo, parting through it like a haunting whisper.

“Madison Dyson.”

On to the next one. A weird man sporting an ever weirder expression. Again, Masamune strikes at lightning speed. The cleanly-sliced portrait gently falls to the floor.

“Rickinator.”

Another face in picture three. A man flashing a brilliant smile. The flash of the blade sapplants it.

“Centurion.”

The fourth one. An arrogant, smug prick. Fuck him. The most satisfying cut yet.

“Harmon. Grayson. Hays.”

One more picture. The face isn’t distinguishable. I don’t acknowledge it. Instead I just look at the camera. My expression is impassive.

“Have I done you proud, Edward? After all, for the first time since your two-hundred-day-reign, this championship is finally back in the conversation of the top titles in XWF.

And each day I’m champion, its stock continues to rise. Each day I become better than who I was yesterday because that is what a champion should strive to be. To be the standard bearer who sets the bar so high, so those around him have no choice but to join him in the sun or be left behind, blinded.”

I shake my head in disappointment before pacing like a caged lion.

“But that’s not enough…And until I defeat you, it will never be enough.”

I pause briefly, pointing Masamune towards the camera.

“That’s where you come in, Edward. See, you’re the King of your jungle, there’s no disputing that. In that lush, green kingdom, Edward’s word is law, as irrefutable as gravity. But it’s been a long time since Anarchy was your kingdom. And this wilderness is unlike any other as well you know.

Things have changed though, Edward. The landscape has shifted. Now, the Assassin rules. No longer does Anarchy fall under your rule. No more.

And, here you are. My ultimate prize comes looking for me, invading my kingdom. This time you’re a poacher, a hunter. And I don’t abide poachers in my kingdom, Edward.”

Another pause.

“You know, you’re not the only one who’s had to fight in a jungle to get to where he is. I’ve done it myself, Edward. My entire career has been a dense, canopy-laden labyrinth, filled with pitfalls and challengers. And I’ve had to quickly grow from scrawny cub to fully-maned lion to reach these heights.”

I crouch down, resting Masamune across my knees, beckoning the camera closer.

“Let me take you back. There’s a stench in the air. Metallic. Traces of dead flesh and dried blood. This is home to all manner of beasts. Amidst the violence is a lone cub, staggering and growing accustomed to his legs. Nostrils flare and ears perk, detecting and sensing the elements around him. Alone. No parents to guide him, only instinct.

Funny thing instinct…it wills the body into motion. It tells the cub to act. Initially, he’s overlooked, brushed aside by larger beasts; not taken seriously. Forced to battle for scraps.

This was my life, Edward. But I watched and listened to the elder beasts. Learned. Instinct told me to act quickly, to be strong, to hunt, to be independent. No time to lick my wounds.

Kill or be killed. That’s the law of the jungle, isn’t it? I embraced this ideology, forcing the elder beasts to take notice. One by one they’ve fallen, succumbing to this lion’s growing strength.

And then he approached. The legendary beast, Centurion. But it was no mere cub he stared at. My roar was loud, my teeth sharp, gleaming. In the end, he was no match for the hungry lion. And that’s when this jungle became mine.

Now, this rampant lion’s kingdom is being invaded. A brazen poacher has stepped into it, daring to strip him of all he is. I’ve been beaten before, Edward. Humiliated. Bloodied. Deceived. But I’ve always roared back and proved my mettle. And as the poacher approaches, peering eyes watch with bated breath.

The poacher wants to take what was once his but I won’t allow it. Whilst I’ll gladly welcome you back to XWF, Edward, I promise this will be a fleeting visit...”

I spin around quickly. One final swift, sharp whoosh is heard followed by a crisp, clean snick. Masamune finds her final target. The picture, cloven in two, drops like the last leaf on a tree in the Fall. My eyes stare at Edward’s decapitated face and then to Masamune.

“ …You know, they say until the lion learns to write, every story glorifies the hunter…”

My fingertip travels meticulously along Masamune’s Ha, the edge of her blade..

“…Well, after this is over, I’m going to take Masamune and carve… Every. Single. Word of this tale into you, so everyone knows what happened.

I don’t abide poachers in my kingdom, Edward. I’ll defend it and my championship with every fiber of my being. Tonight, your challenge, like all the others, will be ended by a swift and painful Masamune Decapitation.”

The light goes out.

THE STORM RAZOR BLADE & LATOYA HIXX - vs - THE COCK AND GUAC CONNECTION VINNIE LANE & MICHEAL GRAVES TAG TEAM - Single RP - 2k word limit

BAMA T: Baby it’s been an electric night!

TODD: And the action isn’t slowing down, Bama! Up next is the tag match we’ve been waiting all night for.

BAMA T: Yeah, baby the debut of Cock and Gauc! The legendary “Loveryboy” Vinnie Lane and The Dark Warrior Michael Graves- this oughta’ be something of a spectacle, baby!

The lights goes out and hear a voice saying Wrestling has one royal family and when Kingdom hit's fireworks burst open



TODD: But first here comes their opponents, a very eager, very dangerous Razor Blade and Latoya Hixx. Two competitors desperate to get back to their winning ways.

Razor Blade comes out wearing a American nightmare outfit with Latoya Hixx on his side and left his arms in the mid air and fist pumps in a fake air and he saw a kid wearing a Blake shirt and he takes off his American nightmare belt off his waist in hands it to the XWF fan and climbs up the steps in hops on the turnbuckle and raises both arms in the air and more fireworks burst once again and he gets inside of the ring and climbs on the top rope taunts some more and gets down and takes off his American nightmare jacket and prepares for a fight

BAMA T: Look at Latoya Hixx! Lots been said over her rapid transformation, but I think she looks great! It ain’t easy to get in shape like that- if I’m Vinnie Lane and Michael Graves, I’m a little bit worried.



Foreigner blasts through the PA system.

TODD: What a great song!

Out walks “Loverboy” Vinnie Lane, wearing his favorite t-shirt, a cutoff Faster Pussycat screen print, long silver tights and shining silver boots. Beside him, Michael Graves. The two of them walking down the ramp beside each other bickering about something.

TODD: It sure doesn’t seem like Vinnie Lane and Gravy are worried about Latoya Hixx at all.

The two of them, still bickering about something, enter the ring and do their poses. Hixx and Blade look unimpressed.

BAMA T: You can’t underestimate the credentials of these two men here, Vinnie Lane is a bonafide legend in that ring, and Gravy-baby has been getting down for a long time. But the real question gotta be is are they worried about coexisting as a team:

TODD: And that has to be their focus tonight and- OH! The bell rings and we’re underway here!

Vinnie Lane starts off against Hixx. Yet there’s ruckus in the corner, as the ref is trying to calm Gravy down who swears he’s supposed to start, and tries reentering the ring multiple times.

TODD: Not even sure why Gravy is arguing here.

BAMA T: Me either, but it’s got the ref all in a fuss. Get the game working yo way, Gravy-baby. 

Vinnie moves in to grapple with The Storm Latorya Hixx, but catches a poorly placed knee to the groin

TODD: It didn’t appear that Latoya Hixx was trying to hit that illegal move there on Lane.

BAMA T: But the ref didn’t see it baby, and now she’s taking full advantage of it!

Hixx leaps on top of Lane as he tumbles over holding his crotch, she begins pummeling him with forearms. Vinnie tries his best to cover up, but he’s still being struck by a few. Hixx stands and pulls Lane up, throwing him into the ropes and hitting a spear on the rebound.

She goes for the cover

ONE!









TWO!!





But Vinnie just powers out.

TODD: A near fall there for Hixx!

Vinnie rolls away from the pin, but Hixx is giving him little time to recover. She whips lane into the corner near Razor Blade, and makes the tag. Hixx and Blade utilize the refs count and double whips Lane into the ropes, hits a double disaster kick on the rebound. Hixx heads back to the apron while Blade covers Lane.


ONE!






TWO!!




BAMA T: Gravy-baby with the save!

Graves tackles Razor Blade off of Vinnie who was kicking out. Graves starts rolling around the mat with Razor Blade, the two strangling one another. The ref is trying to pull Graves off and get him back to his corner, but the two men roll under the bottom rope and fall to the floor, where they stand and begin to brawl.

TODD: This tag team contest has turned into a fight here, as Latoya Hixx now, she’s coming off the apron!

Latoya attacks Graves from behind. She and Razor Blade lift Gravy up, and double powerbomb him into the ring announcer’s chair! The Storm and The American Nightmare high-five. Razor blade slides back into the ring where he’s met with a superkick from Lane!

Before Razor Blade can even fall, Lane is charging him, and pushing him into the ropes. Lane uses Razor Blade’s momentum and whips him across the ring, and on the rebound, LAne plant Razor Blade with a snap powerslam. He covers!


ONE!








TWO!!






TODD: Now it’s Latoya Hixx with the save!

Hixx kicks Lane in the spine, breaking up the fall. An injured Graves slides back in the ring after that double powerbomb. Breaking the ref’s attention. Hixx and Blade start teeing off on Vinnie. First a short arm clothesline from Hixx, and then a DIAMOND BLADE!

BAMA T: OH BABY BLADE!

Razor did his Diamond Blade maneuver from the apron thanks to that added assist from Hixx. Vinnie Lane is down. Blade covers Lane!


ONE!







TWO!!






VINNIE LANE KICKED OUT OF THE DIAMOND BLADE!



TODD: Have we ever seen that before, Bama?!

BAMA T: No way of knowing, baby!

Razor Blade looks frustrated. He picks Vinnie up ready, spins him around, ready to hit the Blade Rose!



BUT VINNIE LANE SPINS OUT!


A kick to the gut from Lane!


He hits the ropes as Blade falls over!




Bad-Medicine Knee Driver!





This one is over! Lane covers!






BUT HIXX IS ALREADY ON HIM!

The ref pushes Latoya away from Vinnie, but now Gravy charges in, a running haymaker clocks Latoya and partially clubs the ref in the back of the head. Lane is up and tries stirring the ref back to his feet, when from behind Razor Blade IS INTERCEPTED BY GRAVES!

As Razor Blade tries to attack Vinnie, Graves clocks Razor Blade with a backfist.

Lane is up, he superkicks Razor Blade and Graves catches him on the way down with a running bulldog. Graves rolls out of the ring, Hixx has rolled out of the ring. The ref has stirred back to his feet. Lane bounces from the ropes, hits a lionsault and covers Razor Blade.


TODD: After all that chaos, this HAS to be over now!

ONE!







TWO!!







NOOOOO!!!!

The Razor Blade kicked out!

BAMA T: Oh baby!

Vinnie Lane looks stunned. He slaps the mat a few times then stands and starts circling Razor Blade, clapping his hands. The crowd is getting fired up. Lane starts walking in on Razor Blade, signaling for the Black Label Driver, but while Lane was looking at the crowd a dropkick out of nowhere from Razor Blade sends Lane stumbling back to the ropes, right in the hands of Latoya Hixx. She makes the tag, with Vinnie recovering in the corner. She runs in, and clear across the ring, gaining speed and smashing into Vinnie with a big splash. Vinnie falls out of the corner and Latoya scales the top rope.

LATOYA’S FROG SPLASH!

SHE COVERS VINNIE!


ONE!





TWO!!



A REVERSES INSIDE CRADLE FROM LANE!


ONE!








TWO!!







HIXX KIXKS OUT!

Both she and Lane jump to their feet, she charges Lane who’s backed into the corner. He steps out of the way at the last second and DDT’s Latoya into the middle turnbuckle pad. The fall looks bad! Lane wastes no time. He picks Latoya up and moves her to the top rope.

TODD: What’s Lane thinking right here!

BAMA T: I don’t know, baby. But he looks ready to put this match away!

Lane lifts Latoya Hixx up onto his shoulder!

OPERATION: MINDCRIME

The inverted falling piledriver crushes Hixx. This one is over!

Lane goes to cover,

But from his corner, Graves is begging to be tagged into the match

TODD: Has Michael Graves been the legal man at all tonight?

BAMA T: He’s been too busy saving Vinnie Lane’s skin, baby!

TODD: He’s probably equally made Lane’s chances worse on a number of occasions too! Vinnie Lane has this match won right now, all he has to do is cover Latoya Hixx

Graves wants in badly, screaming and begging for the tag. Lane shrugs and tags in his partner. Graves immediately runs over clotheslines Razor Blade off of the apron. 

He climbs the top rope, and waits for Hixx to stand. Once she does, he flies off and bashes her over the head with a double axehandle before flinging her into the corner with a falling irish whip. Latoya’ whiplashes into the corner and falls on her rear. Razor Blade is back on the apron, and Gravy again bashes him in the head, sending him to the floor.

Graves starts trying to fire the crowd up now. He sizes Latoya up and chops his hands at his crotch. SUCK IT HIXX!

He runs, he leaps… BRONCO BUSTER! His crotch smacking Latoya in the face, over and over. After one or two thrusts, Hixx is completely unconscious!

TODD: This one is over Bama! Latoya is knocked out cold!

BAMA T: WELL I WONDER WHY BABY!

What’s this? As Graves continues to ride Latoya’s face with the Bronco Buster, metal objects begin falling out of his tights!

TODD: Are those… coins?

BAMA T: I don’t know Todd, but whatever they are the ref just spotted them!

The ref slaps Graves on the shoulder, and pulls him away from Latoya, holding up one of the metal coins and shoving it in Grave’s face, scolding him. That’s all me brother, I’m all natural!

The ref turns and signals for the time keeper to ring the bell.

WINNERS—THE AMERICAN STORM!

Aw, dude, what?!

Meanwhile, in Jett Sterling’s office

Sterling is making some notes on his desk…

When a shadow looms over him…

Sterling looks up…

And grimaces.

”Slow pan out to see what Jett’s looking at…”

Standing before Sterling…

Is Mark Flynn.

Wearing a production headset.

He leans into the mic.

”Now, zoom out to catch us both in frame.”

Indeed, the camera shifts to catch both Flynn and Sterling.

…

Jett eyes this spectacle curiously.

”Flynn, baby, what the h-.”

Flynn holds up a finger.

”Casting, quick question?”

”Can we get a younger-looker, handsomer actor to play Jett? Maybe Donald Sutherland?”

…Jett sneers, impatiently.

”Dead, huh? Hmm. Call his agent, anyway.”

”What are you doing?” Sterling demands, irritatedly.

Flynn scratches his nose disinterestedly.

”Don’t know if you saw that opening speech there, Jet Shop Boys…”

Flynn jabs his thumb in his chest.

”BUT I BROUGHT SOLID GOLD TO YOUR MIDDLE SCHOOL PLAY QUALITY PRODUCTION. I spoke like Brando! I moved like Fosse! I EMOTED LIKE HEPBURN!”

”And you chewed the scenery like a dairy cow. What’s your point, baby?” Spits impatiently.

”Your CREW...” Flynn spits back. ”Was NOT up to par! Your timekeeper MISSED a crystal clear cue to toss me a mic.”

Flynn tsks loudly.

”SLIPSHOD! AMATEURISH!”

…

”As a result, I have taken the liberty as directing every segment I appear in on Anarchy. Just like I plan on showing your talentless roster how to wrestle, I’ll also be showing your talentless techies how to capture the magic of wrestling on celluloid.”

Flynn rubs his hands together.

”Speaking of which… Cut to Camera Three.”

The camera shifts to a sharp angle, using forced perspective to make Flynn look taller than Sterling, even though they’re actually the same height.

“I’m here to find out my opponent for the night.”

Sterling smiles, as he reaches into his desk…

And retrieves a clipboard.

”Well, Mark, baby. I put out an open call for Anarchy wrestlers that like to answer your challenge…”

Sterling slides the clipboard into Mark’s hands.

”Quick pan over the clipboard…”

…The page is FULL of names. There were originally thirty spots and, not only are they full, but people have written their names in the margins… Along the top!

It looks like everyone who’s every wrestled on Anarchy wrote down their name to beat Flynn into a pulp.

Some of them twice!

…Flynn squints, holding the board up.

Sterling smiles, delighted.

From his pocket, Flynn retrieves… a pen.

He crosses out a name.

“Doesn’t fit my vision.”

Sterling’s smile… fades, as Flynn rapid-fire crosses out another dozen names.

“Non-union.”

Flynn quickly marks out a whole column of names.

”Poor handwriting… Shows a lack of attention to detail…”

Sterling frowns, crossing his arms, as Flynn scans the sheet up and down one more time…

…

Flynn nods, handing back the clipboard.

”There we are. Our finalized cast list.”

Sterling eyes the board.

”YOU ONLY LEFT THREE NAMES, BABY!”

”I can only mold the clay I’m given, Jetropolitan.” Flynn tsk-tsks. ”You want a bigger cast? Then, YOU should hire a more talented roster!”

Sterling grits his teeth. ”You think I’m gonna let y-”

”You want THE Mark Flynn to wrestle on your BASICALLY PUBLIC ACCESS wrestling show?” Flynn spits back. ”Then, we’re doing it my way.”

Flynn spins around.

”Flynn exit stage right.”

Flynn leaves.

”Linger on Jett looking defeated.”

The camera indeed remains on Sterling…

Who eyes the clipboard…

Then, strokes his chin thoughtfully.

MARK FLYNN - vs - ??? The Mark Flynn Open Challenge

Flynn starts off in the ring, with his music blaring! He's muttering into his headset mic, directing traffic and pointing to various lights above him...

TODD: Just like he said, apparently Mark Flynn is not only wrestling in this match, but is also directing the production and filming.

BAMA T: What an absolute talent! Like Francis Ford Coppola and Al Pacino wrapped in one genius body! Hopefully his opponents are up to his talent demands!

TODD: Well, according to Flynn, no one on Thursday Nights is worth the paper their contract is written on. I will make every effort to be a non-biased commentator of the action, but I will also disclose my personal hope someone representing Anarchy shuts Flynn's mouth for good!

Who's coming out first for fight on behalf of Anarchy...



Big Preesh struts to the ring throwing his hands up in the air in time with the music. He holds out the front of his BOB tee shirt and shouts about how much he loves being a part of the best group in pro wrestling.

TODD: Oh man! Do you think when Mark Flynn asked for Anarchy’s biggest star… He was anticipating SIX-HUNDRED-AND-FIFTY POUNDS OF BIG PREESH!?!

BAMA T: I can’t imagine, Toddy boy! Flynn is hungry to beat someone down, but with Preesh, he mighta bit off more than he can chew!

When he gets to the ring he punches the top turnbuckle like a speed bag and then shouts "YEAH BITCH!" with his arms raised before waiting for the bell to ring.

MARK FLYNN - vs - BIG PREESH The Mark Flynn Open Challenge

After Preesh’s opening barrage on the top turnbuckle, the cushion cover hangs askew.

Flynn stays in his corner…

And with his right hand, presses his headset mic to his lips.

”Camera #1, linger briefly on the turnbuckle…”

The camera focuses on the partially-exposed turnbuckle.

”Linger… linger… Label that shot ‘THE SETUP’.”

TODD: Bama, what the hell is Flynn up to?

BAMA: Hard to say… Flynn is wilier than a hungry fox, Toddy! But whatever he’s doing, I guarantee he’s doing it to throw his opponent onto his backfoot!

Big Preesh steps forward, beckoning Flynn to step up…

Flynn leans into his headset.

”Production, can I get Big Preesh’s Anarchy record under his name?”

The camera shifts back to Big Preesh…

Under his face, a little graphic displays…

BIG PREESH All-Time Anarchy Record: 4 Wins, 10 Losses, 1 Draw

TODD: …Ooof.

BAMA T: Avert your eyes, Sassafras! That record is Yoo-El-Gee-Why! UGLY! I can’t imagine something uglier than that series of numbers…

Big Preesh looks down at his wins-and-loss record… Then tries to cover it with his hands…

This does nothing because it’s a production graphic and doesn’t exist in physical space.

”Camera Two, can we get a close-up of that nightmarish ass crack?”


The Crowd lets out a horrified euuuuuuuuugh.

BAMA T: OH GAWD! WHY DID I TEMPT FATE? THAT’S SO MUCH WORSE THAN HIS RECORD!

Big Preesh’s face turns bright red… As he tries to hitch up britches to obscure his buttocks from the broadcast booth.

…But, when Preesh’s hand drops to adjust his tights…

Flynn springs off the ropes! LEAPING!

WHAM!

KNEE STRAIGHT TO BIG PREESH’S SKULL!

…Preesh is reeling, bouncing off the ropes…

As he starts to fall forward, Flynn deftly side-steps and latches a wristhold onto Preesh’s arm!

TODD: This is not where Preesh wants to be! Flynn is seeking his devastating Fujiwara Armbar submission hold!

Flynn drives his strength down onto Big Preesh’s body, trying to force him facedown on the mat!

…

But, Big Preesh remains on his feet, resisting!

TODD: Tactical error by Flynn! Some might be able to out-wrestle Big Preesh, but NO ONE ON THE PLANET CAN OUT-POWER HIM!

Flynn eventually leaps, trying to drive his entire body weight onto Preesh’s back!

But Preesh just grabs Flynn by the neck behind him and rolls his opponent forward!

Snapmare! Flynn is prone dead-center of the ring!

Preesh points to the sky!

TODD: Oh my God! Could you imagine if Big Preesh pulled off the upset?

BAMA T: If Preesh beat a former Universal champion like Flynn? His head would almost get as big as the rest of his body!

Preesh hits the rope! He leaps above Flynn, looking for a HUGE SPLASH!

…

”Cut to ringside angle!”

The camera perfectly catches Preesh in mid-splash motion…

…

AS FLYNN ROLLS OUT OF THE WAY!

The entire ring shifts! Springs gyrate! As six-hundred-and-fifty pounds of Preesh hit mat!

BAMA T: Preesh has fallen! And he can’t get up!

Preesh tries to shake off cobwebs, shoving his arms against the mat to try and roll himself up to his f-

FLYNN ROLLS BACK FROM WHENCE HE CAME, ATOP BIG PREESH!

He latches onto Preesh’s arm like a vice and twists it behind his back!

FUJIWARA ARMBAR!

”Camera Two! Zoom in on Preesh’s face! CAPTURE THE AGONY!”

Indeed, Preesh is screaming! Hollering!

”Hold the shot! HOLD IT!”

…

POP!

Preesh’s arm pops out of socket!

With his free hand, Preesh taps out!

WINNER BY SUBMISSION: MARK FLYNN!

Flynn comes up with an arm raised, pumping a fist!

Meanwhile, Preesh’s cradles his now-dislocated arm to his body….

TODD: Rats! A near-upset victory for Big Preesh! He gave it his all and Anarchy should be pro-

Flynn hits the ropes…

BAM! BASEBALL SLIDE TO PREESH’S BACK!

Preesh’s body rolls under the bottom rope and lands to the padded concrete outside with a thud.

THE CROWD BOOS.

Flynn ignores the displeasure of the studio audience, as he presses his headset closer to his ear.

SCENE ONE IS A WRAP! ONTO SCENE TWO! SEND IN THE PREY!

TODD: Flynn didn’t get his fill after one… He’s now demanding another Anarchy superstar!

…



Suddenly, the unmistakable intro of "Push It" by Rick Ross begins to blare through the speakers.

With the lyrics echoing, smoke begins to billow from the stage's floor.

Herschel Kiss emerges from the haze.

He stomps his way down the entrance ramp.

TODD: Oh my! Mark Flynn has to face not one, but TWO of the biggest monsters in Anarchy history back-to-back!

BAMA T: That ain’t no lie, Todd!

The camera captures fans on either side, some cheering, some booing, but all reacting to the mammoth man making his way to the ring.

Midway down the ramp, Herschel spots a sign in the crowd that reads, "KISS THIS!" He chuckles, pointing at it and then motioning a kiss to the fan.

As he reaches the ring he climbs up the steel steps.

Entering the ring, he takes a moment before raising his arms high.

As the song fades, and the lyrics "I'm pushing it, I'm pushing it, I push it..." echo away, Herschel finds his corner of the ring and leans in, ready to push his next challenge to the limit.

MARK FLYNN - vs - “BIG PUDDIN’” HERSCHEL KISS The Mark Flynn Open Challenge

Kiss blows a kiss to Mark Flynn, who is leaning against corner.

TODD: Herschel Kiss, trying to play mind games with Mark Flynn…

BAMA T: It’s gutsier than opossum intestine, Toddy baby! Flynn is the master of mind games! Does Kiss really want to tangle with a mind that twisted?

TODD: Flynn relies on the mental aspect to dismantle his larger opponents… Whatever Kiss can do to keep his head on straight might be the key between victory and defeat…

Kiss beckons Flynn to come to him, puckering up…

Flynn leans into his earpiece.

”Production team, put Herschel’s win-loss record on-screen.”

The camera shifts back to Big Puddin’…

Under his face, a little graphic displays…

’BIG PUDDIN’ HERSCHEL KISS All-Time Anarchy Record: 0 Wins, 4 Losses, 2 Draws

BAMA T: Daaaaang, zero wins?

TODD: Well, some wrestlers are late to bloom, Bama!

”Shift to Graphic Template #2. Filename ‘winless_since.psd’”

The graphic changes…

’BIG PUDDIN’ HERSCHEL KISS ZERO wins since February 11th, 2021

Kiss’s face stops puckering… And turns to an angry sneer

”...Aaaaaaaand to Graphic Template #3. Filename ‘ultra_humiliation.psd’”

The graphic changes…

’BIG PUDDIN’ HERSCHEL KISS ZERO wins in 1,225 days

BAMA T: Still think Herschel’s a late bloomer, Todd?

TODD: …Wait! Flynn HANDPICKED THESE OPPONENTS… And is now mocking them for being lackluster!

Kiss sneers angrily… Fuming mad.

”Medium close-up on Hersh’s face. Load Custom Graphic… whats_herschel_thinking_about_subway_party_sub.psd…”

KISS IS DONE WITH THE PHOTOSHOP JOKES!

He charges the corner! Looking to Urban Crush Flynn against the corner turnbuckle!

…Still facing Kiss, Flynn rests his hands on the top rope…

And pulls himself up to the middle rope!

As Kiss charges forward…

Flynn lifts himself and catches Kiss right under the chin! KNEE LIFT!

Kiss gets sh-sh-shellshocked from Flynn’s strike! Big Puddin’ spins around, covering his face…

As Flynn shoves off the turnbuckle into a sprint!

He leaps!

RUNNING DROPKICK!

Kiss is pushed forward! Kiss flops to the mat, grounded into his corner…

Flynn dusts his arms as he strides forwardly confidently.

”Camera #1, quick fading shot from Kiss to that turnbuckle.”

Indeed, the camera fades from Kiss, breathing heavily on the mat, then switches perspective so the camera focus shifts from Kiss in the foreground, to the background where the turnbuckle pad is barely clinging on…

”Label this shot ‘The Reminder’.”

TODD: Bama, what the HELL is this maniac doing?

BAMA T: I’m such a simple country color commentator, Todd. But, in my estimation, Flynn’s trying to ensure narrative footage captured conveys his vision of the gauntlet’s narrative.”

Kiss climbs up to one knee, shaking off cobwebs from Flynn’s opening barrage.

Flynn walks to Kiss’s side and grabs his arm!

TODD: Flynn! Looking for a second submission finish!

Flynn tries to drive his body weight to force Kiss facefirst into the mat!

But, Kiss resists!

…Flynn, while maintaining possession of Kiss’s wrist, extends his arm, to drive his elbow INTO the back of Kiss’s neck!

Kiss’s knees start to shake! Struggling to resist Flynn’s pressure!

Will they buckle?!?

…

NO!

Kiss raises himself up, throwing Flynn backwards!

Flynn’s spine HITS the partially-exposed turnbuckle!

AND the pad falls off!

TODD: Oh man! Even with the padding, hitting that buckle is agonizing!

Flynn comes off the buckle cradling his spine… Clearly in pain!

As Kiss scoops him off the mat! In powerslam position!

TODD: OH MY GOD! Flynn is positioned for disaster! Herschel Kiss could pick up his first very win against a former Universal champion!

BAMA T: The 1200 day drought could end!

Kiss lifts Flynn in his arms, ready to throw him to the mat!

…But as he falls down for a devastating slam!

FLYNN SLIPS LIKE A RAT OUT OF KISS’S GRIP!

ROTATES HIS BODY!

And as Kiss hits the mat face-first!

Flynn latches onto Kiss’s arm!

FUJIWARA ARMBAR!

TODD: Nooooooooo! Once more, Flynn snatches victory from the jaws of defeat!

BAMA T: Just when you think you’ve finally cornered him and there’s no escape… THAT’s when he’s most dangerous!

Kiss’s arm shakes… He desperately tries to extend his finger tips to grab the rope!

”CAMERA THREE! Zoom in on Kiss’s hand! Will he make it?!?”

His hand is inches away! The ropes are hauntingly close!

”CUT TO HERSHEY’S FACE! CAN HE HOLD ON?!?”

Herschel howls in pain! His face is wrapped in pain!

”Linger… Linger… Aaaaaaaaaand…”

Kiss stretches as far as he can… He’s so close…

”MONEY SHOT!”

POP!

Kiss’s shoulder snaps in Flynn’s hand!

Immediately, Kiss’s face shifts to ANGUISH!

HE TAPS!

WINNER BY SUBMISSION: MARK FLYNN!

Kiss rolls outside… cradling his dislocated shoulder as Flynn stands and takes a bow.

”Hard cam, go! Production team, put up awards_season.psd.”

Flynn spins to the crowd and takes a bow.

Beneath him, text reads.

FOR YOUR EMMY CONSIDERATION

TODD: Absolutely disgusting! Flynn is marching through a ticker-tape parade of opponents he hand-picked to beat!

BAMA T: And he’s immaculately directing it! Can a wrestling show win an Oscar?

Flynn steps back to his corner, pressing the headset mic

”Big finish. Send in the last lamb to be slaughtered…”

…



TODD: …I have no idea who this is.

BAMA T: Oh… Y’know… It’s… uh… that guy.

Indeed, some guy steps out with a microphone ready to rap his theme song!

MARK FLYNN - vs - Y’ALL KN-

”HOLD IT.”

Jett Sterling bursts through the curtain…

And behind him…

Is a member of the Anarchy medical staff!

BAMA T: Probably here to help the two guys with broken arms lying around the ring!

Instead of jogging down the ramp, Jett points the staff toward…

YKW!

YKW is upbeat and shakes the medical pro’s hand, who leads him… back behind the curtain?

BAMA T: Hey! Jett’s medical croney just dragged off Flynn’s last dance partner!

Jett raises a mic to his lips!

”I’m sorry to say, Flynn… That last gauntlet opponent YOU picked was just selected for a random medical evaluation.”

Flynn leans over the top rope, steamed at having his plans disrupted.

”Don’t worry, baby! Thankfully, I took the liberty of selecting an… understudy... from the list of names you said didn’t make your cut…”

TODD: OHO! Finally! Someone that can kick Flynn’s ass!

Flynn stews angrily as Jett steps aside and welcomes through the curtain…

…



WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

MARK FLYNN - vs - ‘THE NATURAL’ DICK DRIZZLE The Mark Flynn Open Challenge

The spotlight catches Dick Drizzle stepping out in a blindingly bright robe, instantly grabbing everyone's attention. Swaggering down the ramp with a whiskey bottle in hand, he throws out a hearty "Woooooo!" to the roaring crowd.

TODD: YES! Wrestling legend Dick Drizzle is going to come out here and shut Flynn up for good!

BAMA T: Oh please! Drizzle is knocking on seventy-eight years old! He couldn’t shut a bottle of his own incontinence medicine!

Reaching the ring, Dick downs a swig of whiskey, hands the bottle off to 'Loady', and confidently gestures for the ref to open the ropes for him. With a slight stagger, he slips through, and makes a spectacle of removing his robe and revealing his wrestling attire of droopy trunks and a t-shirt supporting a local dive.

Flynn, at first, is irritated that Sterling has derailed his plans.

Then, he eyes Drizzle’s geriatric physique up and down…

And shrugs.

”The show must go on.”

Flynn leans into his headset.

”Production, put up Drizz-”

WHAM! Before Flynn can start picking on Drizzle’s record, Drizzle catches him with a right hand!

Flynn covers his face shocked, as he stutter-steps back toward his corner!

TODD: Drizzle clearly knows better than to let Flynn play mindgames! The Natural’s bringing the attack straight to the King of the Midcarders!

As Flynn’s back hits the turnbuckle, Drizzle makes his move!

With surprising spryness, Drizzle mounts the second rope and starts walloping Flynn’s dome with lefts and rights!

TODD: Holy hell! Drizzle’s moving up there like a man thirty years his junior!

BAMA T:...So, he’s moving like a 49-year-old?

The crowd counts along with Drizzle’s punches!

FOUR!

FIVE!

SI-

Flynn lifts his knee, and shakes the ropes…

Drizzle loses his balance and hits the mat… And droops down to cradle his knees!

TODD: Ooooh, Drizzle has put several lifetimes worth of miles on those knees!

As Drizzle recovers, Flynn springs out of the corner…

BAM! RUNNING BOOT CATCHES DRIZZLE SQUARE IN THE HEAD!

Drizzle stiffly hits the mat, pawing at the ceiling…

BAMA T: Hot dang! Anyone get the license plate on that boot?!?

Flynn shakes his head, trying to regain his composure as he goes to the corner with the now-exposed turnbuckle…

He presses the headset mic.

Camera two, please get a shot of the geezer trying to find his life alert button…

The camera shifts to Drizzle, lying on the mat, shaking his head.

Drizzle eyes the camera…

And winks with a smile.

The crowd hoops and hollers!

TODD: Oh! Miscalculation by Flynn! He tries to play head games by catching Drizzle’s bad side.

BAMA T: Unfortunately for Flynn, when it comes to the camera, Drizzle has no bad sides! Drizzle may be older than the hills, but even I gotta admit, he’s got IT.

Flynn sneers, angrily. ”CAMERA THREE, capture his deflated oldman ass!”

The camera swivels to Drizzle’s posterior.

..Drizzle sticks it out confidently!

The crowd laughs and cheers! Several older women in the crowd even swoon and fan themselves!

TODD: Incredible! Every psychological maneuever of Flynn has ZERO effect on Dick Drizzle!

BAMA T: Of course, Todd! Drizzle’s been in the wrestling industry since the days it was part of the traveling circus! You can’t embarrass a man whose had his sense of shame BEATEN out of him!

Drizzle gets revved up by the crowd’s energy rising back to his feet!

Flynn furiously charges!

…

BUT DRIZZLE DIPS!

And catches Flynn up and over!

Back body drop! Flynn lands hard on the mat, cradling his spine!

Drizzle grabs Flynn by the heel and pulls him toward the center of the ring!

The crowd is on its feet!

TODD: OH MY GOD! IF DRIZZLE LOCKS IN THE TIPSY TOE HOLD, THIS ONE IS OVER!

Flynn struggles on the mat to wriggle his way free…

But like a mousetrap on a rat’s tail, Drizzle refuses to let go!

Flynn finally stops struggling…

When Drizzle’s back is to that exposed turnbuckle!

TODD: …Wait!

Drizzle lets out a woo!

And twists Flynn’s leg to lock in the Tipsy Toe Ho-

CAMERA THREE! GET THE SHOT!

WHAM! Flynn kicks Drizzle in the ass! Propelling him toward the exposed turnbuckle!

…

DRIZZLE’S SKULL CONNECTS! His head is sliced by the metal!

”Label that ‘THE PUNCHLINE’”

TODD: What the hell was that, Bama?

BAMA T: Rule of threes, Todd.

Drizzle shakes his head… Unfortunately, splattering blood from his split skull into the first row!

…Flynn kips up off the mat as Drizzle stumbles backwards in a daze!

Flynn seizes Drizzle’s arm! And trips the old legend to the mat by the ankle!

HE TWISTS AS HARD AS HE CAN!

FUJIWARA ARMBAR!

The crowd screams, begging Drizzle to hold on!

Drizzle’s arm shakes!

…

BUT HE TAPS!

WINNER BY SUBMISSION: MARK FLYNN!

Flynn stands up, pumping his fist!

YESSSSSSS!

Flynn pumps his fist!

TODD: Dang it! Three Anarchy members threw all they could at Mark Flynn!

BAMA T: But Mark Flynn survives the gauntlet! And, might I add, got some great shots we don’t usually catch on Anarchy!

Flynn turns to each side of the arena, bowing like a conductor having finished a symphony…

The crowd rains down boos and vitriol!

But Flynn continues until he turns to the ramp to bow…

…

And sees a number of Anarchy stars headed down the ramp his way!

Joey Oddjobs! The Big Upps! “The” Jessica Anderson! Darren Dangerous!

TODD: It looks like some Anarchy regulars are ready for their close-up! As in bringing their fist close-up to Flynn’s face!

The Anarchy stars hit the ring!

…Just as Flynn slides out, grabs his 24/7 briefcase and hightails it over the railing into the crowd!

TODD: What an absolutely disgusting display from Flynn! Anarchy’s roster won’t soon forget Flynn’s disgusting attack against them! And you can bet they’ll all be rooting for Sean Parker to wreck Flynn at Leap of Faith!

BAMA T: They should be thanking Flynn, Todd! That was the best produced match segment in the entire history of Anarchy! Directed by AND starring Mark Flynn!

The Big Upps help the injured Drizzle to his feet as Oddjobs and Anderson both beckon Flynn to come back here and take a beatdown!

Flynn instead reaches the mouth of the exit tunnel into the rest of the arena… Before spinning his finger in a circle.

”THAT’S A WRAP! CUT TO COMMERCIAL!”

SEAN PARKER© - vs - EDWARD ANARCHY TITLE MATCH - SINGLES!

TODD: “Here. We. Go! Who would have thought we’d see this, Bama! EDWARD back on Anarchy, facing off against the dominant champion since EDWARD himself held the title. The Sky Assassin himself, Sean Parker!

BAMA T: This could go down as the greatest match in Anarchy’s history but ya gotta wonder baby, if Parker’s head is gonna be in this after what happened on Warfare and Mark Flynn already trying to get into his head earlier!”

TODD: “Parker’s a pro, Bama, he’s got this!”



“Ken’s Theme [Metal Cover]” by ToxicxEternity starts to play throughout the arena. Moments later, Sean appears on the stage in his hooded waistcoat, going down on one knee, his head low and sparks fill the stage area. As the song explodes into life, Sean leaps to his feet, his arms outstretched and his hood falls back behind him. Sean walks confidently to the ring, running as he gets to ringside and slides effortlessly under the bottom rope. He repeats his open arm pose to each side of the ring before he takes off his waistcoat, climbing up one of the turnbuckles, holding up the Anarchy Championship. Sean fist pumps to the crowd before doing a backflip back down as his music fades out and he waits in one of the corners.



EDWARD AND APE FRIENDS GO TO BIG RING. THEY WALK AND WAVE TO FANS. APE FRIENDS GIVE BANANAS TO FANS. EDWARD SHOW BICEPS AND GRUNT LOUD TO FANS. FANS MAKE LOUD NOISES AND EDWARD FEEL STRONG. EDWARD AND APE FRIENDS READY TO REGAIN SHINY!

TODD: “Here. We. Go! Who would have thought we’d see this, Bama! EDWARD back on Anarchy, facing off against arguably the most dominant champion since EDWARD himself held the title. The Sky Assassin himself, Sean Parker!”

BAMA T: “This could go down as the greatest match in Anarchy’s history but ya gotta wonder baby, if Parker’s head is gonna be in this after what happened on Warfare!”

TODD: “Parker’s a pro, Bama, he’s got this! If he retains tonight, it will be defense number five. Two more and he equals EDWARD’s record of seven defenses. He only needs to hold the belt another 18 days to break EDWARD’S 200-day record.”

BAMA T: “Who are you? Mister Stats?”

TODD: “Just doing my job, Bama!”

As the bell rings, Sean and EDWARD come out of their corners slowly, sizing each other up. Sean doesn’t take his eyes off the former champion, as he pulls down on the top rope, stretching his arms. EDWARD himself is crouched on all fours, crawling around his half of the ring methodically, ape-like, trying to intimidate Sean. Eventually the two meet in the center of the ring and EDWARD stands up, having a distinct height advantage over the champion. Sean just tilts his head back slightly to meet EDWARD’s eye line.

CROWD: “THIS IS AWESOME!”

Clap

Clap

Clap-Clap-Clap!

CROWD: “THIS IS AWESOME!”

Clap

Clap

Clap-Clap-Clap!

TODD: “These two haven’t even locked up yet and the crowd are absolutely eating this up!”

BAMA T: “You’ve got two of the greatest in Anarchy history about to duke it out, baby! In a match no one even expected to see! I’m losing my mind too!”

Sean looks to the side at the cheering fans and EDWARD looks to the other side. They look back at one another and give each a nod of respect before backing off slightly. Champion and challenger lock up in a good old-fashioned collar-and-elbow tie-up. After a short back-and-forth, EDWARD pulls Sean and pushes him back, sending the champion halfway across the ring! Sean regains his bearings, sitting up, looking up at EDWARD from his seated position and acknowledges his power with a nod of his head.

TODD: “What power by the former champion! He just threw Sean across the ring like he weighed nothing but a buck-oh-five!”

BAMA T: “That’s why they call him the Great, baby!”

Sean cagily gets back to his feet, flexing his fingers out in front of him, inviting EDWARD to come in again. He duly obliges, thrusting his arms forward to engage in another tie-up but this time, Sean anticipates it. He ducks under EDWARD’s arms and swiftly shifts behind him and grabs him by the waist, locking his hands together tight. EDWARD throws some wild elbows around behind him but Sean has his cheek pressed against EDWARD’s back and he hits nothing but fresh air. Sean distributes his weight and tries to lift EDWARD for what appears to be a German suplex but can’t quite get the leverage. EDWARD tries to pry Sean’s fingers away but the grip is tight. Sean pushes EDWARD into one of the corners, ramming him chest-first into the turnbuckle before finally getting the elevation he needs and he shows incredible strength to lift him up and hits the German suplex and the crowd comes to life!

TODD: “Wow! Talk about strength, Sean Parker just deadlifted EDWARD into a German suplex!”

BAMA T: “Look at EDWARD’s face, he can’t believe it!”

The camera zooms in on EDWARD’s face, painted with an expression of utter disbelief as he too climbs to his feet. He grunts something at Sean, thumping his chest in what appears to be a show of respect. Sean nods his head in acknowledgement. He beckons EDWARD toward him and the two suddenly meet dead-center in the ring and begin to tee off on one another! Sean fires martial arts strikes with lightning-fast speed, focusing on EDWARD’s limbs and body, trying to wear the bigger man down. EDWARD can’t do anything but cover up such is the speed and precision of the champion’s flurry until he finally explodes out of his shell, cracking Sean across the chest with an open-hand chop that echoes like a shotgun blast throughout the Sioux Falls Arena. Sean’s eyes widen as his chest ripples from the impact of EDWARD’s massive hand, already swelling up with red welts and burst blood vessels.

TODD: “Jesus Christ what a shot from EDWARD! I think he just caved in Sean’s chest!”

BAMA T: “What impact! He lit Parker up like a freakin’ Christmas tree, baby!”

EDWARD wastes no time and grabs Sean by the throat and lifts him high above his head with ease with a Gorilla Press. He launches the champion like a lawn dart into one of the corners for an improvised snake eyes as Sean’s face collides with the top turnbuckle pad. Sean staggers out of the corner, dazed and EDWARD takes him down with a wild big foot straight to the face. Sean hits the mat hard, starfished and EDWARD immediately tries for a pin!

One!









Two!










But Sean throws a shoulder off the mat after the two-count. He shakes his head from side-to-side, trying to clear the cobwebs from eating EDWARD’s foot but the ex-champion doesn’t give him any time to recuperate, hauling him to his feet like he was nothing. EDWARD sends a clubbing forearm shot down onto the back of Sean’s neck with such force, he falls to his knees. EDWARD grabs Sean back up and sends him staggering into the corner with a vicious headbutt that knocks Parker for six. Sean tries to steady himself in the corner but is feeling the effects of the viciousness of EDWARD’s attacks.

TODD: “Aside from that impressive German in the early-going from Sen, it’s been all EDWARD so far, Bama! Maybe tonight is just one too many for the Sky Assassin!”

BAMA T: “How many times have we seen Parker start off slow though? He can take a helluva lot of punishment and then some and always seems to find a way, baby!”

EDWARD zeroes in on Sean again, mounting the second turnbuckle and begins to lay into the champion with clubbing forearm shots before leaning and begins to bite Sean on the nose! We can see Sean’s legs flail and kick as he tries to fight the voracious challenger off him. The referee tries to step in, admonishing EDWARD for biting and gives him a five-count. EDWARD eventually stops and looks at the referee with a primal look on his face which immediately forces him to retreat in fear. However, the brief lapse in concentration is all Sean needs. He buries his head into EDWARD’s midriff, eliciting an involuntary yelp from him. Sean grabs him by the legs and somehow heaves EDWARD onto his shoulders, walking out precariously from the corner.

TODD: “Look at the power of Parker! He’s got EDWARD up! What’s he gonna do with him!”

BAMA T: “This ain’t gonna end well, baby, whatever he does!”

Sean raises EDWARD up and plants him down hard into a sit-down powerbomb that shakes the ring! Sean stays seated, keeping a hold of EDWARD’s legs into a pinning predicament!

TODD: “LIGER BOMB FROM THE CHAMPION! SEAN’S GOT THE COVER!”

ONE!!

















TWO!! But EDWARD kicks out with authority, muscling a shoulder off the canvas from under one of Sean’s legs and a loud gasp emanates from the Sioux Falls faithful in attendance. Sean rolls backward and back to his feet. He senses a shift in the momentum of the match for the first time. He runs off the ropes, just as EDWARD is climbing back to his feet. Sean springboards off the ropes and tries for a hurricanrana but, incredibly, EDWARD catches him mid-flight! He presses Sean up again and throws him but the champion uses his incredible agility to land perfectly on the top rope. Sean flips forward, landing on EDWARD’s shoulders from behind and uses his momentum against him to spike him with a vicious avalanche snap poisonrana!

TODD: “Raidenrana from Parker! EDWARD’s head just got driven straight into the canvas!”

BAMA T: “Wha-did-a-tell-ya, baby! The champ’s come to life!”

CROWD: “HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!”

EDWARD’s momentum from taking the Raidenrana sends him catapulting back to his feet and Sean doesn’t miss a beat, running towards EDWARD at full-speed and cracks into him with a flying knee strike sending him flying onto his back! Sean makes the cover!

ONE!!
















TWO!!











THR-NO! EDWARD kicks out!

Sean slams his hands on the mat in frustration, rolling off of EDWARD and holding up three fingers to the referee pleadingly but the official gestures with his own shoulder that EDWARD kicked out and holds up two fingers.

TODD: “The champ can’t get frustrated now, he needs to stay focused! He’s got EDWARD right where he wants him!”

As EDWARD struggles to his feet, using the ropes to pull himself up in one of the corners, Sean measures him, waiting for him to get up. Sean then sprints towards him again but out of nowhere, EDWARD springs to life, rampaging towards the champion like a man possessed. He spins around and almost takes Sean’s head off, turning him inside out with a brutal discus lariat.

TODD: “Good God Almighty! DISCUS LARIAT FROM HELL!”

BAMA T: “I swear I saw Parker’s head spin right around! He may need an exorcism to recover from that!”

TODD: “EDWARD looked like he was on dream street but found another level from absolutely nowhere and just ran through Sean Parker like a bulldozer!”

Sean lies on his front, eyes glazed over, mouth agape. The referee is down to check on him but EDWARD rolls Sean over and goes for a pin. The ref begins to count.

ONE!!













TWO!!












THREE!-NO! Sean shoots a shoulder up out of sheer instinct more than anything, so much that he sits up, like he’s just risen from the grave. His eyes are wide, like he’s just been injected with adrenaline as EDWARD turns to face him. Champion and challenger press their foreheads against one another, roaring into each other’s faces as they climb to their feet in sync. Sean seems to have a new lease of life and he shoves his head up into EDWARD’s face before nailing him with a spinning backfist that rocks him. Sean reaches up, grabbing EDWARD by the back of the head and leaps up at the same time, ramming the base of his knee under his chin, sending EDWARD’s head snapping back. EDWARD looks dazed, stumbling back and Sean looks to go for the kill shot. He runs to the ropes, springboarding off and twists through the air but unbelievably, EDWARD catches him like a baby and in a fluid movement, he hoists Sean onto the back of his shoulders. The crowd comes to life, knowing what could be coming!

TODD: “Here we go! Could we crown a new champion, Bama?!”

BAMA T: “Stone Age Slam time, baby!”

But within a split-second, Sean flips EDWARD over, drilling the back of his head and shoulders into the mat with an improvised Crucifix Driver! Sean keeps EDWARD’s shoulders and arms locked down and stacks him up!

ONE!!



























TWO!!























2.9999! EDWARD somehow rolls through, breaking the pinfall attempt up. Sean this time doesn’t let his frustration get the better of him. He springs back to his feet, coiling his leg up.

TODD: “Oh, Sean’s looking for the Blade of Miquella, Bama! He’s got that leg chambered, ready to unload!”

BAMA T: “He’s knocked many opponents out with that lethal kick, in XWF and beyond but can he take down the King of the Jungle?!”

EDWARD eventually regains his footing, turning around and Sean goes to unleash his devastating head kick. But EDWARD has the wherewithal to duck his head at the eleventh hour, as Sean’s foot just grazes his hair and no more. Sean spins right around and as he does so, EDWARD, like a cat, scales the top rope and leaps off, cracking Sean on the base of the head with the tip of his elbow, sending him falling back like a domino.

TODD: “Savage Elbow! On point! This could be it!”

EDWARD makes the cover! The referee goes to count!

TODD: “Here we go, Bama!”

BAMA T: “New champ, baby!”

ONE!!






















TWO!!































THREE!! WAIT!

TODD: “Did he do it?! That’s three!”

BAMA T: “No! Look! Sean’s foot!”

The camera zooms in and shows Sean’s foot on the bottom rope and the referee waves off the three-count. This time it’s EDWARD’s time to show his annoyance, shrieking at the top of his lungs with a primal roar that echoes throughout the arena. Sean rolls onto his front, almost commando-crawling as he tries to pull himself back up. He feels tentatively at the top of his head to check for blood as he uses the ropes to keep him on an even keel. The camera pans across to EDWARD who looks almost feral now, frustrated that Sean managed to avoid defeat following the Savage Elbow. His nostrils flare like a bull and he runs towards Sean like it’s the Pamplona Festival, ready to unleash another barrage of pain. However Sean spies him coming out of his peripheral vision! He spins around and just catches EDWARD on the temple with the Blade of Miquella spin kick! EDWARD doesn’t fall though, he just stumbles and staggers, punch drunk, stopped in his tracks until he falls to his knees. Sean can’t believe EDWARD is still conscious let alone still vertical. He screws his face up in anger, ripping his elbow pad off, throwing it into the crowd. He sizes EDWARD up, who has a glassy stare on his face. Sean explodes across the ring, unsheathing his arm and ramming his elbow straight into EDWARD’s face and he collapses his back, star-fished.

TODD: “Masamune Decapitation! EDWARD could be out!”

BAMA T: “Sean said he would end EDWARD’s challenge with that move!”

Sean collapses on top of EDWARD, managing to reach across and hook one of his legs. The referee counts and the crowd along!

ONE!!


























TWO!!


























THREE!! The bell rings and the crowd cheers loudly!

Winner - AND STILL ANARCHY CHAMPION - Sean Parker!

TODD: “My God what a match! What. A. Match! From starting off the night not knowing what the main event was going to be to having these two warriors give us their absolute all, that was incredible!”

BAMA T: Take that, Warfare! Nobody does like Anarchy, baby!”

As EDWARD tries to climb to his feet, the crowd comes to theirs in a show of appreciation, applauding the great former champion. Sean drops the Anarchy Championship belt and holds his hand out to EDWARD. He stares at Sean’s hand, grabbing it as he is pulled back to his feet.

CROWD: “THANK YOU, EDWARD!”

Clap!

Clap!

Clap-Clap-Clap!

CROWD: “THANK YOU, EDWARD!”

Clap!

Clap!

Clap-Clap-Clap!

A smile crosses the great jungle king’s face as he stares around at the cheering crowd before looking back to Sean.

SEAN: “What they said. Thank you, EDWARD.”

EDWARD stoops down and picks up the Anarchy Championship and hands it to Sean.

EDWARD: “YOU GOOD CHAMPION, SKY MAN! YOU RULE ANARCHY WELL WITH SHINY! EDWARD HONORED TO FACE SKY MAN IN GREAT BATTLE! EDWARD MAKE YOU OFFICIAL TRIBESMAN!”

Sean smiles and nods in acknowledgement, raising EDWARD’s arm and the crowd cheer again for the two combatants. EDWARD gives Sean a final nod and smile before leaving the ring and making his way to the back, helped by his ape brethren. The referee raises Sean’s once more as he soaks in the cheers from the Sioux Falls crowd.

TODD: “What a tremendous show of respect between Sean Parker and EDWARD THE GREAT! An incredible main event to end an incredible Anarchy and an incredible week overall here in XWF!”

BAMA T: “They tore the house down, baby! It’s gon’ be a long time before we see another match like that!”

TODD: “You’re not wrong, Bama. Anyway, that’s all we have for you tonight, ladies and gentlemen, from Bama and myself, thank you for joining-wait a minute!”

Todd’s end-of-show sign-off is interrupted abruptly as Sean Parker is blasted from behind with a steel folding chair and the cheers from the crowd turn to deafening boos.

TODD: “It’s Mark Flynn! Mark Flynn just attacked the Anarchy Champion!”

BAMA T: “You had to know this was comin’! Parker cost Flynn a cash-in opportunity on Warfare and Mark Flynn doesn’t forgive and forget easily, baby!”

Sean arches his back in pain, turning around and Flynn clobbers him again, this time taking the chair straight to the face, crumpling to his knees. A laceration has already opened up on Sean’s forehead and the blood begins to drip down his face. Flynn leans down, grabbing a dazed Sean by the face with both hands to the point they’re almost nose-to-nose.

“You could’ve avoided all of this, Sean!

Flynn grips Sean’s head by the hair and rams his knuckles straight into the cut on his head, opening it up even more with a vicious punch.

“You made me come over to this cesspit of a show!”

Another hard punch to the face of the Anarchy Champion.

“You could’ve stayed here and minded your own business!"

More knuckle sandwiches.

“But no!”

Punch.

“You had to…"

Punch.

“...stick your nose…"

PUNCH!

“...IN MY FUCKING BUSINESS!”

Flynn lets go of Sean’s hair and he collapses onto his front, barely conscious. Flynn looks around, taking in the deafening boos cascading throughout the Sioux Falls Arena. He stares at his knuckles, decorated in a crimson mess from the blood of Sean Parker.

TODD: “Can someone get this lunatic out of here?! Where is Jett? Where is security?! We need some help out here! Sean Parker has just been brutalized by Mark Flynn and no one is lifting a damn finger!”

Flynn isn’t done though. He grabs the steel chair and lays it carefully on the mat before pulling a limp Sean up to his feet. Flynn pulls Sean back into a reverse face lock, holding him in place for what seems like an eternity. Sean’s arms are limp by his side. Flynn smiles wickedly.

TODD: “Come on Flynn, enough is enough! No, no, no!”

Flynn slams the back of Sean’s head into his knee before spinning around and planting him face-first into the chair with a sickening crack!

TODD: “LOGICAL CONCLUSION! On to the goddamn chair!”

Flynn remains in a one-kneed position, staring down at a prone, unconscious Sean Parker, a pool of blood creeping out and seeping into the canvas. Flynn sees the Anarchy Championship lying next to him and picks up. He looks at the belt with a look of disgust on his face before taking a bloodied hand and smearing it all over the face plate. He coughs a big mouthful of saliva and spits on the championship before throwing it back down on the mat with authority.



Suddenly, the epic opening of “Fame” by Royal Deluxe booms throughout the arena and the fans go totally unglued! Flynn’s face immediately turns to the stage area.

TODD: “Holy crap, could it be?! Bama! Could it be?!”

BAMA T: “If he appears, this is gonna be insane, baby!”

As the song explodes into life, from behind the curtain appears the reigning XWF Universal Champion and the fans are still going crazy.

CROWD: “SEB! SEB! SEB! SEB! SEB!”

TODD: “It’s him! Sebastian Everett-Bryce is on Anarchy! This is unbelievable!”

BAMA T: “I can’t believe my eyes! Shit just got real!”

Seb, Universal Championship clutched by one the straps points at Flynn threateningly before sprinting down to the ring! He drops the title on the mat and he and Flynn go toe-to-toe in the middle of the ring and the fans still can’t believe what they’re seeing.

CROWD: “HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!”

TODD: “You’re goddamn right, holy shit! SEB and Flynn! SEB and Flynn duking it out in an Anarchy ring! Did you ever think you’d see the day, Bama?!”

BAMA T: “I can barely hear you over this crowd, Todd!”

Flynn and SEB trade rights and lefts, neither man giving an inch until SEB starts to get the better of the exchange. Flynn gets staggered by SEB’s right hands before the champion hits the ropes and almost takes Flynn’s head off with an…

TODD: “EMPIRE KICK! HOT DAMN!”

The crowd cheers again loudly as Flynn is sent flying over the top rope and out of the ring. SEB rips open his shirt, tossing it aside and slams his hand into his chest emphatically, leaning over the top rope, pointing at Flynn and mouthing off at him. Flynn holds his jaw, a strange combination of furious and dazed as he backpedals up the ramp, pointing back at SEB, shouting “This isn’t over, you Limey fuck!”

TODD: “All I can say is thank God for Sebastian Everett-Bryce. If he hadn’t shown up to fend off Mark Flynn, God knows what he would’ve done to Sean Parker.”

BAMA T: “Oh yeah, because Sean doesn’t look like he was just in a car wreck, right?! Where was SEB the whole time Flynn was beating the crap out of him?!”

SEB keeps his eyes trained on Flynn as he disappears backstage. SEB turns around as Sean is just starting to come to, his face barely even visible because of the claret mask he’s wearing. SEB walks towards him, leaning down and helping him to his feet. Sean is on spaghetti legs but manages to stand on his own accord and it dawns on him that SEB is standing in front of him before leaning back on the ropes for support. The Universal Champion picks up the blood-stained Anarchy title belt. He looks at the belt and then to Sean and the two champions exchange a silent look before SEB drapes the Anarchy Championship over Sean’s shoulder.

SEB: “You good?”

Sean doesn’t respond verbally, instead he just takes a few labored breaths before giving SEB a tired nod and a thumbs up. SEB reciprocates the nod before fist-bumping Sean on the shoulder and takes his leave of the ring, saluting the fans by raising the Uni Title above his head as Anarchy comes to a close.

MATCH WRITING CREDITS: Dolly Waters Sean Parker Mark Flynn