JENNY MYST
- vs -
NED KAYE
- vs -
DOLLY WATERS
- vs -
BOBBY BOURBON
- vs -
DIONYSUS
- vs -
ISAIAH KING
Match starts in a ring at the base of the Eifel Tower
Winner will be the first person to grab the case attached to the tippy top of the Eifel Tower
Winner receives a XWF 24/7 Briefcase - Good for 1 Year
2rps/3k
HHL: Hello everyone and Welcome to the City of Light, Paris - France for this year's LEAP OF FAITH Pay Per View. As always I am here with Pip and we will be announcing tonight's event. Pip and I just received word that tonight's previously scheduled opening match has been cancelled. Apparently Major Jung was detained by U.S Customs at the airport port over some Passport issues and was unable to make it here tonight. When Dick Powers was appraised by management of the situation he opted to go out for a night on the town at the XWF's expense rather than wrestle some local "Frog Eating Fuck". His words not mine."
Pip: Can you even blame him? The French are the fucking worst...
HHL: They really aren't Pip but you are entitled to your opinion. Anyway with that out of the way tonight's opening match is now going to be the Anarchy Title match between champion EDWARD taking on Mr. Oz. So let's get to it.
Warhammer 40k: Darktide OST - Immortal Imperium plays
People begin to bang on drums as they play his entrance music. It seems as if Oswald has literally paid for an entire orchestra, just to play him to the ring. After the first round of singing ends and the drums start off once more, Oz starts to walk to the ring, dressed in a large white cloak covering his body. However, instead of entering the ring first, he waits. He stands there near the ring floor next to the edge of the ramp. He slowly pulls off the cloak, folds it and then places it on the edge of the ring, next to one of the posts before climbing onto the apron and over the top rope where he goes to his corner, sitting down as he waits for the bell.
"Captain Caveman" by the Demigodz plays
EDWARD AND APE FRIENDS GO TO BIG RING. THEY WALK AND WAVE TO FANS. APE FRIENDS GIVE BANANAS TO FANS. EDWARD SHOW BICEPS AND GRUNT LOUD TO FANS. FANS MAKE LOUD NOISES AND EDWARD FEEL STRONG. EDWARD AND APE FRIENDS READY TO RETAIN SHINY!
The bell rings, but the two competitors at the top of the Arc de Triomphe are way too high up to hear it! Oz and Edward stand at the ready as a referee nervously occupies the space between them. The referee looks down at the height they're all standing from and has to wipe a bucketload of sweat from his brow. On the other hand, neither the champion nor the challenger seemed concerned. It's like EDWARD and OZ have been waiting their whole careers for this moment.
Todd: Geez, Gator, look how high up they are! They're nearly 200 feet in there atop that building!
Gator: You know what they say, Todd: EVERYTHING IS BIGGER AND MORE PHALLIC IN FRANCE!
Todd: Gator, that's Texas and you know it! Besides, this building isn't even particularly phallic! The Arc de Triomphe is based on Roman architecture and has wide columns and archways!
Gator: I know a phallus when I see one, even if it's not circumsized!
The referee walks back to the center of the ring and instructs Oz and EDWARD that the bell has rung. Oz cocks an eyebrow, unsure of the truth to that statement. After all, how could the referee have heard the bell from so far up? But the wild man EDWARD has no sense of civilization or decorum. He charges ahead, vaulting across the roof of the Arc with incredible speed before leaving his feet for a major dropkick!
That goes nowhere, because Oz simply sidesteps it!
Todd: OOF, EDWARD just landed flat against the roof of the Arc!
Gator: That's got to be one rough bellyflop!
Oz laughs at Ed's miscalculation before he begins laying a slew of boots to the smaller man's back. The champion starts crawling back towards the center of the monument, and rises up to his knees, but Oz is right on him with a clubbing blow to the back that sends him sprawling. Oz makes a half-circle around EDWARD before stopping in his tracks and dropping an elbow onto the champion's back! EDWARD howls out in pain as one of his lower vertebrates is knocked out of place!
Oz, sensing the momentum on his side, doesn't take a single break. He quickly scrambles back to his feet before he grabs EDWARD by the hair. Mr. Oz begins dragging the smaller man across the roof of the Arc, scratching his skin to all hell. Once Oz nears the edge of the roof he hoists EDWARD up into a powerbomb position.
Gator: Oz is making fast work of the champion!
Todd: He wants to go back to his GOD-KING days, Gator!
Oz lifts EDWARD up by the trunks, almost set to throw him off the structure, until a EDWARD gouges his thumbs into the eyes of the big man! Oz immediately screams and falls to his back, with the champion on top of him, still gouging his eyes out with one dirty and one wooden thumbnail! The referee rushes in to check on the action, but the match is no DQ so there is nothing he can do but scream in sympathy alongside Oz!
Todd: OH MY GOD, DO YOU SEE THE BLOOD COMING OUT OF OZ'S EYES?!
Gator: Hell yeah I do! Tell the cameraman to get a close up off that!
The camera zooms in on EDWARD's thumbs gouging Oz's eyes. After a few seconds of close-up we see Oz send a barreling right hand towards EDWARD's chin, forcing the champion to finally get off! EDWARD rolls to the side as he releases a mockery of vicious laughter. Oz, meanwhile, is still screaming as he tries to work his way back to his feet. The camera catches a glimpse of Oz's face, and it's completely covered in dirty blood leaking from his eyes.
Todd: I'm not sure Oz will be able to finish the match!
Gator: Quit your whining, Todd! Oz used to be a God-Champion, he'll be fine!
Oz is back on his feet, holding his eyes with one hand and reaching around the air with the other as he slowly stumbles around the roof of the nearly 200 feet tall building. EDWARD rises to his feet with a sick grin on his face, watching Oz like a predator would stalk it's prey. Oz is slowly but surely making his way back over towards the center of the roof, but that's when EDWARD finally strikes again! EDWARD dives at Oz's ankle, causing the man to fall to the ground! The champion then climbs onto Oz's back and starts laying into him with vicious fists to the back of the head! Blood splatter flies everywhere, and the referee looks shocked by the level of carnage! Splinters from EDWARD's wooden hand embed themselves in the side of Oz's head!
Todd: I feel sorry for whoever has to clean that roof up!
Gator: I feel sorry for EDWARD, there's no way Oz is going to let this type of attack go unpunished!
EDWARD has really laid a beating to Oz, and a big smile flashes across his face. EDWARD steps off of Oz and starts slamming his chest with his own bloody fists like some kind of King Kong. EDWARD screams out some incomprehensible self-aggrandizement, but unfortunately the microphone is too far away to hear any of it. EDWARD takes one more look back at Oz before he starts looking around the roof for a path of escape.
Todd: Wait a second, I'm not sure EDWARD remembers the name of this game...
Gator: What do you mean? He's being super X-treme today!
Todd: I mean I'm not sure he remembers the stipulation! It looks like he's looking for a way to ESCAPE the roof!
EDWARD walks over to one of the columns of the roof and begins inspecting it before mounting it, as if he's going to begin descending it. The referee walks over to him and reminds him of the match stipulation, but by now, EDWARD is already partway down the column! By now Oz has risen to his feet, and is wiping away most of the blood from his face. By the time EDWARD realizes his mistake, he's halfway down the column!
EDWARD starts hastily climbing back up to the roof of the Arc, where Oz WOULD be waiting to send him back down, but instead Oz is on the middle of the roof listening carefully. Still without most of his vision, Oz is slowly inching towards EDWARD's location as he hears the small man scurrying up the side of the monument. EDWARD finally gets back to the top of the structure, but as soon as he's back on the roof Oz takes a blind swipe in his direction- and grabs a fistful of hair! Oz smirks as he realizes he has the champion in his grasps, and Oz chucks the champion off the roof! EDWARD separates from his hair as his body goes flying!
Gator: This could be it for the champion! And I mean that literally! He might die from a fall of that height!
Todd: We have a new champion! We have a ne-...wait....
The blinded Mr. Oz raises his hands in celebration atop the Arc, as he knows he just threw EDWARD off the roof! But what Oz doesn't know, is that during the fall EDWARD jammed his wooden hand into a loose piece of the column halfway down, stopping him from falling any further! EDWARD IS STILL ON THE STRUCTURE, DANGLING BY HIS WOODEN HAND!
Gator: Well technically Oz is still the winner, right? I mean he did HURL his opponent OFF the structure!
Todd: I don't think so, Gator! He only hurled his opponent ONTO another PART of the structure! This match is still going- the referee and Oz just don't know it yet!
The referee raises Oz's hand near the ledge of the monument, but neither man has no idea that EDWARD is staring up at them from 100 feet down. The champion sneers with hatred and anger in his eyes before he begins stealthily climbing the column, moving as quietly as he can so as to not catch Oz's attention. The referee tells Oz to rest while the title is brought up for a celebration, and Oz decides to drop down to his knees. As far as Oz is concerned, he has completed his task. He's won back his championship: even if it temporarily cost him his eyesight to do it.
Quietly but surely, like a thief in the night, EDWARD rescales the monument. EDWARD has to leave his wooden hand behind, but even with the handicap the man scales the column like a silent spider monkey.
Gator: This is MADNESS!
Todd: No, Gator: this is ANARCHY! Madness is a worse show!
The referee, title in hand, turns around just in time to see a silent EDWARD standing directly behind a kneeling and blinded Mr. Oz. The referee gasps, and Oz raises a curious eyebrow. That's when Oz feels a hot breath on his neck. Mr. Oz turns around and hurls a blind fist in the champion's direction, but it's too late for him. EDWARD sidesteps the blow and SPARTA KICKS OZ OFF THE ROOF OF THE MONUMENT!
Winner and STILL XWF ANARY CHAMPION - EDWARD
"Vengeance" by Power Glove" plays
"Vengeance" by Power Glove hits over the PA system as the crowd begins to boo. The camera pans across the front row of the aisleway, where various fans flip it off and wave to their family at home. Eventually it makes it to the top of the ramp where we see the giant Connect 4 Board set up as B.O.B. D pushes his way through the curtain.
HHL: "Well, Pip, it's time for our next March and what a unique concept it is!"
PIP: "That's right, Heather, the TV Title is on the line in what essentially boils down to an extreme game of Connect 4!"
HHL: "As the name of the game implies, the first competitor to line up four of their pieces in a row wins; but in order to place your next piece, you will have to spend 30 seconds in the ring between placements."
PIP: "I never thought it'd be possible to complicate Connect 4, but here we are!"
D takes a moment to soak in the hate before walking over to the game board and stack of pieces. He looks bemused as he picks up one his pieces and examines it, before doing the same to the board. Despite a ref ordering him not to, B.O.B. D coyly drops it into the board and begins heading down the aisle.
HHL: "For those of you watching at home, that does NOT count."
PIP: "Why not? He was in the ring for at least 30 seconds at War Games!"
HHL: "Barely."
A referee removes B.O.B. D's game piece as he approaches the ring and climbs onto the apron. He takes some time to absorb all the hate for him, before entering and waiting for his opponent.
EYES
ON
VAUGHNEMOUS
NO, I WON'T GIVE IN, I WON'T GIVE IN
TILL' I'M VICTORIOUS
AND I WILL DEFEND
I WILL DEFEND
The lights in arena turn into an explosion of pinks, purples, greens, rainbows, unicorns on fire, lucky charms, rivers of sugar, and mountains of Meow Mix Ocean Explosion tuna treats as Angelica Vaughn walks out onto the ramp. She pauses with her hands on her hips, letting her cape sway gently, and gives her opposite coast home crowd a wide smile. Behind her, a blur of black and red speeds forward and under her arms as Sarah Lacklan slides in front of her and matches her pose, her head nearly a full foot under Angie's. Sarah tilts her head way wayway back and up and flashes her Billion $$$ Smile, and the two wink at each other. Angie then takes her hands off her hips and pushes Sarah forward, making the former Universal Champion squawk in wide-eyed surprise, before the two make their way down the aisle.
Halfway there, Angie slows to a stop, her face turning slack, with her jaw falling to her chin. Ahead of her, Sarah sighs and rolls her eyes before backing up to Angie and, with a gentle firmness, pulling her away from that Cute Boy she had noticed sitting in an aisle seat. Angie looks longingly at the verified Cute Boy while Sarah shakes her head.
Once at ringside, Sarah slides into the ring underneath the ropes as Angie climbs the steps. Sarah gets to her feet and pulls down the top rope with all her weight, allowing Angie to step over the top rope like the most giant of giant wrestlers. As Angie walks to the center of the ring and stands with her hands on her hips, Sarah takes a microphone from Tigs and gives her a big wink.
SARAH:Hello, everyone! My name is Sarah Lacklan-
The crowd, dutifully, responds with the sound of a trumpet’s fanfare.
SARAH:World’s Greatest Life Coach and I am here to introduce to you the very FIRST member of the Family First of the XWF and my absolute (non-spouse) #RideOrDie. She is standing at the eternally totes-too-tall height of five feet and eleven inches...
CROWD: BAY-BAY
SARAH:...and weighing in today at about...oh...I'd say about thirteen or fourteen well-fed kitties...and because she likes dumb, useless, God-awful farm chores-
Sarah shutters in disgust.
SARAH:-she is fighting out of the Supes Totes Amaze Ranch in Texas...she is the Leggy Blonde of Legend…President of the Deborah Hodge Fan Club…the FUN-raiser of the XWF...the Vaughnemous A.N.G… the XWF Television Champion...
The crowd waits patiently as Sarah takes a deep breath.
SARAH:ANGELICAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Angie raises her hands into the air as a bedazzled spotlight shines down on her.
SARAH:VAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUGHNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN
The crowd breaks out into a chant as Angie leads them with pumps of her arms.
Both competitors circle the ring for a moment, with Angelica Vaughn stopping to offer her opponent a handshake. B.O.B. D laughs and slaps it away, before locking up with her. D gets the advantage with an early Headlock, but the TV Champion drops back to the ropes and attempts to sling the challenger forward, to no avail. D overpowers her, stopping them in their tracks while keeping a tight lock around her head.
HHL: "Big D's not usually known for rest holds."
PIP: "It's all strategy, he's stalling for 30 seconds so he can put his first piece in!"
B.O.B. D watches as the clock hits 30 seconds, causing him to grab Angelica Vaughn by the back of the head and toss her over the top rope. He then rushes to the opposite side and slides under the bottom rope, rushing up the ramp towards the oversized Connect 4 Board. Once there, he quickly grabs one of his pieces and drops it in the center spot while celebrating as if he'd won the entire thing.
PIP: "B.O.B. D did his research! The odds tend to favor the person who starts in the middle of the board!"
HHL: "That may be true, but this ain't no ordinary game of Connect 4! If either of them can incapacitate the other long enough, they could theoretically place four in a row without their opponent ever having touched the game board!"
B.O.B. D continues to celebrate, pointing to himself and motioning around his waist............................ only to get cracked in the skull with a surprise VAUGHNEMOUS that sends him tumbling into the Connect 4 Board!!!!!!! D bounces off the reinforced structure and collapses to the ground, allowing the Television Champion to place a piece of her own right next to the challenger's.
PIP: "Not only does that act as a block, it could also set up for connecting four, later."
HHL: "Big D said he should've seen that move comin' at War Games, I wonder if he feels the same about that one, too?"
Angelica Vaughn turns and hurries back for the ring, taking advantage of her opponent's downtrodden state. She slides in the ring and waits for the timer to strike 30 seconds, again.
PIP: "The clock's tickin' and B.O.B. D hasn't moved a muscle!"
HHL: "With little resistance, Ange'll have quite a few options with this next move."
The moment the time strikes 30, Vaughn rolls back out of the ring and up the ramp. She grabs another piece and steps over the former Big D, placing it right on top of her previous one.
HHL: "That makes two in a row! If she can manage that a couple more times, she's gonna have her easiest defense yet!"
The Television Champion goes to walk back over her opponent, only for him to reach up and grab hold around her waist.
PIP: "Doesn't look like it's gonna be THAT easy!"
Angelica Vaughn tries to fight her way out, but the only thing that frees her is a German Suplex into the game board!!!!! The Champ crashes to the floor as the challenger begins the trek back to the ring.
PIP: "This could be D's chance to place multiple pieces in a row!"
B.O.B. D stops halfway down the ramp, before turning and heading back towards his opponent.
HHL: "What's he doing?"
PIP: "Making SURE he gets to place multiple pieces in a row!"
As Angie struggles to her feet using the game board, B.O.B. D approaches her from behind, wraps his arms around her waist, turns, and delivers a second devastating German Suplex into the Connect 4 Board. He then takes a moment to appreciate the beauty of his work before going back to the ring for his 30 count. Upon completing it, he struts on up the aisle and places his second game piece overtop of his first one.
HHL: "Is he copying Angie's strategy?"
PIP: "If he is, he's doing it alot better!"
D flips his opponent off before jogging back to the ring and sliding in. As the countdown begins, the confident challenger starts doing jumping jacks perfectly timed with the clock as the fans rain down with boos. After thirty of 'em, he climbs through the ropes and heads in the direction of the board.
HHL: "Angie Vaughn hasn't moved an inch."
PIP: "And she doesn't look like she's going to!"
B.O.B. D grabs another one of his pieces and rolls his opponent's lifeless body to the side. He then places his third piece over top of the other two before holding up his index finger for the camera.
PIP: "That's 3 in a row, vertically, one more and we're gonna have a new Champion!"
A cocky D holds his arms up and poses for a minute, giving Vaughn enough time to recover and jump onto his back with a Rear-Naked Choke!!!!
HHL: "That's what showboatin' against someone who's already pinned you gets ya!"
Angie squeezes tight, quickly turning the challenger's face blue. Despite this, D makes his way down the aisle towards ringside, carrying Vaughn the entire way. His face now a dark purple, B.O.B. D manages to roll himself AND the Champion back into the ring before succumbing to the lack of oxygen and passing out!!!!
PIP: "What a move by the challenger! He held on just long enough to ensure he gets back in for his 30 seconds!"
Angelica Vaughn let's go of the hold and slides to a corner for a moment to catch her breath. Upon realizing her opponent's timer is also running, she pops to her feet and tries pushing him out with her foot, using the top rope for leverage. Unfortunately, B.O.B. D is able to wake up early enough to wrap his arms around the bottom rope and hold himself in place.
HHL: "This has GOT to be frustrating!"
Angie Vaughn refuses to let it get to her, instead backing up and motioning for D to get to his feet. As he begins to, she rushes forward with a Soccer Kick............................
HHL: "VAUGHNEMOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!"
...................only for B.O.B. D to sidestep it, slip behind her, and hoist her up onto his shoulder!
PIP: "DAN SLAM!!!!!!!!!"
However, before D can hit it, Angie Vaughn is able to grab onto the top rope and use it to pull herself free, slipping out onto the apron. B.O.B. D turns and reaches for her, but she's already jumped down and booking it for the game board!
HHL: "I don't think Big D can catch her!"
PIP: "We'll he's gonna try!"
B.O.B. D does try, but is unable to catch Angelica Vaughn in time to prevent her from blocking his 4 in a row with one of her pieces!!!
HHL: "Big D's gonna have to start from scratch after that!"
PIP: "Will you get his name right?! It's BOB D!"
HHL: "Yeah, I'm not calling him that."
As soon as Angie finishes placing her piece, she turns around to see a fuming B.O.B. D charging towards her with a Clothesline! Thankfully, she manages to see it just in the nick of time, allowing her to duck under it, causing D's arm to crash HARD into the game board. He turns around, grabbing it, and gets put down with a Sick Kick that damn near turns him inside out!!!! With her opponent out, Angelica Vaughn heads back for the ring, where she waits for her 30 seconds to pass.
HHL: "Big D is starting to stir, but Angie's almost good to go, again!"
PIP: "B.O.B. D's gonna meet her at the top!"
With her time up, Angelica Vaughn leaves the ring and gets met by a recovered D in the aisle. The two of them exchange strikes, with the challenger connecting with multiple Punches only for the Champion to respond with a couple Chops to the chest! This only furthers to anger the newest member of B.O.B., causing him to grab Angie by the hair and chuck her into the barricade!
PIP: "D already spent his 30 seconds in the ring; this is gonna allow him to place another piece!"
As the announcer calls it, B.O.B. D approaches the game board and places his next piece immediately beside his other bottom one.
HHL: "He may have had to backtrack, but he's technically no worse off than Angie right now."
PIP: "He may even be better off; having 2 in a row horizontally AND diagonally versus her single vertical."
Angelica Vaughn crawls towards the game board as B.O.B. D heads back towards the ring. He stops and takes a quick gander at her, before delivering a swift Kick to the ribs that sends her rolling closer to the board. D then turns and reenters the squared circle as his opponent makes it to a vertical base, where she places her next piece over top of her previous 2 in a row.
HHL: "Angelica Vaughn is one piece away from retaining her Title!"
PIP: "But she's gonna have to go back to the ring where B.O.B. D's waiting!"
The TV Champion looks at the ring, where the challenger motions for her to join him. The audience cheers her on, allowing her the extra boost to confidently confront her opponent.
PIP: "D's 30 seconds are up, but he isn't in ANY hurry to leave!"
HHL: "You're right, Pip, it looks like he's gonna make her play his game now!"
Angie goes to slide in the ring, but B.O.B. D meets her there, wrapping his arms around her body and hoisting her up high above his head. Vaughn manages to slip free, though, allowing her to run to the ropes and rebound back at her opponent. She goes for a Flying Clothesline, but the former Big D is able to catch her and lift her above his head. However, before he can do anything, the TV Champion is able to stick her fingers into the challenger's mouth, applying pressure under his tongue with her fingers!
PIP: "EW!!!"
HHL: "Ew is right! Lord only knows where that mouth has been.........."
PIP: "Someone sounds jealous!"[/red]
HHL: "Ew."
The submission causes D to drop Angie, allowing her to land on her feet and sink the move in properly. B.O.B. D struggles, slowly stumbling backwards as his opponent continues to apply pressure. All of a sudden, B.O.B. D wraps his arms around the Champion and Belly to Belly Suplexes her into the corner, causing her to land awkwardly on her head!!!!!!
HHL: "Angelica Vaughn's neck could be broken!"
[white]PIP: "B.O.B. D might've just won himself the match with that one!"
B.O.B. D rolls out of the ring and goes back to the Connect 4 Board, where he blocks off Angie's 3 vertical pieces with one of his own.
HHL: "That was an interesting choice, I'm not sure I wouldn't have kept working on my own row instead of blocking my opponent's."
PIP: "Why take a chance? If Angie somehow recovers, she would've been one piece away, now she's at least 2. And if she doesn't recover, it won't matter anyway!"
B.O.B. D casually strolls back to the ring, chuckling to himself as the ringside trainer checks on his opponent. He gets in and taunts the downed Vaughn, who looks up at him through glossy eyes. It takes her a moment, but she eventually comes to and politely moves the trainer aside, heading for D. With his next 30 seconds over, he hurriedly turns and runs back up the ramp, with a likely concussed Angelica Vaughn following close behind. B.O.B. D makes it to the board with enough leeway to place a piece next to his others on the bottom row.
HHL: "I'm telling you, Big D fucked up not placing the first one there! If he had, we'd have a new Television Champion right now!"
PIP: "All part of the game, Heather; how was he supposed to know he was gonna safely place 2 pieces in a row? Sometimes the best offense is a good defense."
As B.O.B. D places his piece, Angie Vaughn tries to sneak one of her own in, but D grabs her by the wrist and snatches it out of her hand. He holds it up in front of his face, berating her for thinking she could pull one over on him........................ only to have it Kicked into his face! The strike rocks him enough to allow the Champion to grab a different one and place it next to her bottom one!
PIP: "Angie Vaughn's still got a ways to go if she wants to make it 4 in a row!"
HHL: "She's taking a chance of her own by not blocking Big D's row."
PIP: "Do you want them to block, or not? Make up your mind, Heather!"
HHL: "I'm just impartially stating facts, and those facts change as the game goes on."
B.O.B. D goes to get to a vertical base, but the TV Champion sizes him up and connects with another vicious Kick to the head. He collapses to the floor as Angie turns and heads back for the ring.
PIP: "I don't think B.O.B. D's gonna remember how to PLAY after that one!"
HHL: "Ange definitely bought herself some time, that's for sure!"
Another 30 seconds pass in the ring for the Champion, allowing her to go back to the game board and place yet another piece, this one on her other one in the bottom row, as her opponent drools with his face smashed against the ground.
PIP: "We are one piece away from having a winner! At this point, even I have to admit blocking would be pointless!"
Angelica Vaughn makes her way back to the ring, with little resistance. However, as soon as her time starts, B.O.B. D struggles to his feet and stomps towards ringside.
PIP: "That is one pissed off D!"
HHL: "This has GOT to be the longest 30 seconds of Angie Vaughn's life!"
The TV Champion anxiously stares at the timer, motioning for it to hurry up as B.O.B. D grabs the second rope and uses it to pull himself up onto the apron. As he does so, Angie Vaughn comes at him with a Bicycle Kick................ which he avoids with a sidestep! Vaughn's leg gets caught over the top rope, allowing D to pull her out and toss her to the floor.
PIP: "That was only 28 seconds! Angie Vaughn still needs 2 more if she wants to place her last piece and retain her Title!"
HHL: "That's still 28 more than Big D!"
B.O.B. D continues to stand on the apron, keeping a keen eye on Angie Vaughn as she gets back to a vertical base. Once she does, B.O.B. D jumps off and connects with a Hurricanranna to the shock of everyone in attendance.
PIP: "I can't believe he can still do that!"
HHL: "Desperate times call for desperate measures, he knows if he's going to win the Title, it has to be NOW!"
Despite a chorus of boos, a pumped up B.O.B. D stands up and rolls back in the ring, starting his time. He points to the X-Tron and makes a belt motion around his waist, as Angelica Vaughn pulls herself up by the apron. D is too distracted to see her roll in and finish her time as his also completes. He goes to leave the ring, but Angie jumps on his back and tries to lock in another Rear-Naked Choke. This time D doesn't play around, wasting little time reaching up, bending over, and tossing her onto the hard steel of the ramp! He then continues up the aisle, but the TV Champion is persistent, once again jumping up and, literally, taking his breath away.
HHL: "Angelica Vaughn refuses to quit! She's gonna make Big D drag her to hell for that Title!"
With the game pieces within arm's reach, B.O.B. D picks one of his up and drags Vaughn towards the board. This allows Angie to grab a piece of her own, unbeknownst to D. As B.O.B. D lifts his arm to place his last piece, Angelica Vaughn crawls up his back and slips her hand past his, dropping her piece in a split second before he can................................
Winner AND STILL XWF TELEVISION CHAMPION - ANGIE VAUGHN
HHL: "That makes 4 in a row!............. pieces and Title defenses! Angie Vaughn is proving herself to be a formidable Television Champion!"
B.O.B. D's piece drops into place a split second too late. He drops to a knee as Angelica Vaughn gets off him and takes her Championship from the ref. The fans cheer her on as she heads to the back, with D finally realizing what happened.
PIP: "Tough break for the newest member of B.O.B., but there's no shame in losing to a Champion............"
An enraged D turns and takes his anger out on the Connect 4 Board. He shakes it over and over again, with the bolted down structure slowly beginning to come apart from the floor
HHL: "He's gonna tip it!!!"
The powerful B.O.B. D manages to push the game board over, getting major heat for doing so. He then makes his way for the exit, but not before knocking the remaining game pieces everywhere.
HHL: Ladies and gents, we’re keeping the show rolling! And this next match has MAJOR implications heading into Relentless!
PIP: Indeed, Heather! We know at least ONE person is leaving Paris with a 24/7 briefcase? But, if the X-Treme Title doesn’t change hands tonight? All of a sudden, we’re headed into wrestling’s biggest annual weekend with TWO briefcases, ready to spring their holder straight to the main event!
East 1999 by Bone, Thugs-N-Harmony Plays
The smoke fills up with red on the stage, as the arena lights flickers. Then once we see "The Rebellious One" on the X-Tron, then we hear the voice of Bone Thugs and Reggie walks down to song.
HHL: Coming first to the ring, we have three-time X-Treme champion, Reggie Estrada!
PIP: The unorthodox one! The rudo supremo, fresh off a recent lucha libre tour through Guatemala. If you’re ready to count Reggie as a non-threat, just remember, that’s when he’s most dangerous.
Then we see him with walking down the ramp, and stop at the camera gives it the finger. Then he rolls into the ring, and goes to the top rope and poses. Then he jumps down, and chills on the corner as his theme cuts off.
Metalingus by Altra Bridge - Edge's Entrance Music Plays
A figure is seen walking out from the back wearing a black hooded sweatshirt on. The hood was over his head so he couldnt be seen, and his head was looking down.
He stood in a stance. And as a white light appeared on his front, he unzipped his sweatshirt and showed the front of the t-shirt:
As it continued he turned around and took off his hooded sweatshirt and revealed the back of the t-shirt which read:[/color]
He turned back around and stood in a pose as the white light bathed on him to reveal: MASTERMIND
HHL: Speaking of three-time X-Treme champions… Mastermind! Mastermind is nearly synonymous with the X-Treme Title!
PIP: And, you gotta remember, the current champion started his reign by very controversially stealing the belt from Mastermind’s underling, Kris ‘The Hammer’ Von Bonn!
Mastermind then smirks as he walks all the way to the ring, with the Misfits Manager Antony The Jerk, walking not far behind. Followed by Melanie 'Crayzee' Childs, Kris 'The Hammer' Von Bonn and… yes, even, Scarlet the Hunteress!
PIP: Ooooh, MM brought his entire menagerie of Misfits to accompany him to ringside.
HHL: Typically, they like to get involved behind the official’s back on Mastermind’s behalf…
PIP: But, it’s X-Treme rules, Heather! No disqualifications! Meaning the Misfits can get involved as much as they’d like!
Eleanor Rigby (Strings Only) by The Beatles plays
Mark Flynn bursts through the black curtain under the X-Tron! On his shoulder, he’s got his X-Treme title… He’s wearing his trademark bomber jacket… He spins around to show the back to the crowd…
Taped over ‘King of the Midcarders’... In Black Sharpie, across his shoulders, Flynn has written ‘GOOD GUY’.
Despite this, he’s received with a smattering of boos and jeers. He strolls down the ramp confidently…
HHL: Flynn has not had an easy road to a briefcase! He’s fought legends! He’s fought former Uni champs! Hell, he survived an onslaught at WarGames, featuring the very best the XWF has to offer!
PIP: And STILL, Flynn has clung onto the X-Treme title for dear life! But, he’s still one win away from a 24/7 briefcase! And a competitor as experienced and stats-obsessed as Flynn knows, NEVER consider a match a win until the official has counted to three.
The Misfits clear out of the way, over to Mastermind’s corner, as Flynn climbs the steps, through the ropes and into the ring.
The three competitors meet in the center of the ring. Flynn hands off his belt to the official.
Mastermind nods at Flynn, then tilts his head toward Reggie.
HHL: Mastermind suggested to Flynn in his promos this week that they should team-up to eliminate Estrada, the wild-card, then settle this match one-on-one.
PIP: More like five-on-one, with all the Misfits around the ring!
…Flynn scoffs, unimpressed.
Mastermind sneers.
Reggie seems willing to fight whatever’s thrown his way.
The moment, the literal split-second that the bell rings, Mastermind puts his fingers to his lips and whistles!
And the Misfits slide under the ropes!
HHL: Welp, that didn’t take long!
Estrada delivers a dropkick to MM’s face! MM stumbles backwards into the ropes… But not before Scarlet grabs Reggie from behind, holding his arms behind his back as Von Bonn swings his trademark hammer into his ribs!
Flynn points, laughing at the chaotic mess befalling Estrada… Before remembering a good guy would probably spring into action to help…
”Ugh, do I have to?”
Flynn charges into assist the outnumbered Reggie… BUT, he’s held! Melanie ‘Crayzee’ Childs has wrapped her arms around Flynn’s ankle…
YEOW! AND SHE BITES FLYNN’S LEG!
HHL: Not the first time Flynn’s been bitten in an XWF ring, Pip! Fun bit of trivia, one time, XWF’s resident violent clown, Blair Sully, bit Mark on his pen-
PIP: EVERYONE ALREADY KNOWS THAT, HEATHER. Flynn brings it up like four times per promo!
Flynn falls to one knee, smacking Childs with right hands straight to her face… But her jaws holds on like a LEECH! As Mastermind speeds across the ring and PUNTS FLYNN IN THE FACE! Flynn flops onto his back!
HHL: Wow! Flynn made fun of Mastermind coming into every match with outlandish, overly complicated plans, but this week, he came in with a simple, effective solution!
PIP: Superior numbers! Surround and overwhelm! General Patton would be proud!
Mastermind starts stomping Flynn into a stain on the mat! Flynn desperately shields himself with his arms, as he tries to swipe away Crayzee, who continues to gnaw at his leg!
Meanwhile, Von Bonn and Hunteress continue to soften up Estrada! They drive him toward the bottom turnbuckle on his back! Hunteress slips under the rope, and starts choking Estrada from the outside! Von Bonn softens up Estrada with stomps to the gut!
HHL: Folks, this isn’t a match, this is a mugging! Is anyone gonna try and stop this?!?
If You Don't Leave In Thirty Minutes... by Count Bass D plays
We see the X-Tron come to life, and we see "John Black" name shot up with the .38 special, and we see him at the stage in a black and white setting as he is standing there taking in the mixed reactions. Joining him is fellow T.H.U.G., Tommy Wish! They’ve both got baseball bats!
PIP: Be careful what you wish for, Heather! The calvary has arrived and they mean BUSINESS!
HHL: Indeed, Pip! The Madness Gemini Champions are here and they mean business!
Outside the ring, Anthony the Jerk whistles to get Mastermind’s attention! The Kiwi turns, just in time to see Wish and Black roll under the ropes, with their weapons!
Black stands up and SWINGS for the fences! Mastermind ducks!... But from the mat, Flynn lifts his leg, the one that Crayzee is still biting…
AND WHAM! Crayzee takes a baseball bat square to the dome! She gets blasted, falling through the ropes outside the ring!
Von Bonn hears this, spinning around… He swings his hammer!
But Tommy Wish ducks, and catches The Hammah with a bat to the ribs! Wish winds up to break the bat over Von Bonn’s skull… But Hunteress reaches in and pulls Von Bonn out by his ankle under the ropes, narrowly avoiding further damage! Out of the chokehold, Estrada climbs back to his feet!
Mastermind scoops his arms under Black, Belly-to-belly suplexing him straight to the ground!
…But, when Mastermind stands back up, Flynn catches the Kiwi with a standing dropkick! It drives Mastermind backward…
Into Estrada, who catches him with a second dropkick to the back of the skull! That Drops Mastermind to his face in the center of the ring… The THUGS (and Flynn) all scramble to ambush the Kiwi like he did them! They start stomping Mastermind!
HHL: Turnabout is fairplay!
…But before too much damage can be done… the Jerk reaches in desperately and manages to get MM outside the ring and outside further attack!
The Misfits quickly stage a strategic retreat back to the ramp! Mastermind’s three allies, (especially Von Bonn), all seem viciously eager to hop back in the action!
But, instead, Mastermind holds back his associates.
Flynn reaches over the top rope, beckoning the Misfits to try that again now that the odds are even, confidently jaw-jacking, Leaning comfortably against the shoulder of Tommy Wish.
…
Wish looks at Flynn’s arm. Displeased.
…Flynn looks at Wish.
Then, he looks over at Black, who looks none-too-pleased with Flynn either.
HHL: Flynn did not make ANY friends of the THUGS this week. He called them all gross, problematic and perpetuating violence against women.
PIP: And those things may be true!
…
……
HHL: …Did you have more to say, Pip?
PIP: Nope, that was the end of that sentence.
Flynn lifts his hands, trying to reason with Black and Wish, like, hey, we have bigger problems than me… right? The two back him into the corner…
Mastermind smiles, directing the Misfits to surround the ring!
PIP: Mastermind knew this alliance wouldn’t last! Now, he lets his opponents drain each other’s energy!
Wish steps forward, looking to bat Flynn in the ribs…
But Flynn HEADBUTTS Tommy straight in the face! Wish flops onto his back!
Meanwhile, behind Flynn, Estrada is climbing the top rope…
Fresh off headbutting a man he believes is a TimeLord, Flynn spins on his old tag partner, John Black, reeling back his fist, like, fine, you wanna go? Let’s go!
…But Black shakes his head… Then, he points up and behind Flynn.
…
Flynn turns around…
STRAIGHT INTO A MISSILE DROPKICK FROM REGGIE ESTRADA!
Flynn flops backwards into a front facelock from John Black…
BLACKA JACKA, CENTER OF THE RING! Flynn’s skull CRASHES against the mat!
Black rolls over, going for the cover…
HHL: Wait a second, JB isn’t in this match!
PIP: The X-Treme title is defended 24/7, Heather! Anyone can pin the champ at any time, in the match or otherwise!
Indeed, the official drops to count!
1!
Mastermind storms back into the ring, under the bottom rope! The Misfits follow!
2!
The pin is broken up…
…
BY REGGIE ESTRADA!
HHL: Dissension amongst the THUGS!
PIP: With a belt on the line, it’s every man for himself!
Black looks up at Reggie in disbelief! Reggie points at his own waist, like this is HIS chance!
Before they can hash out these issues, the Misfits spring into action, hammering (both metaphorically and literally) Estrada and Black with blows! The THUGS are separated and cordoned off into separate corners…
Mastermind runs for the corner with Estrada… AND SLAMS HIM AGAINST THE TURNBUCKLE!
Mastermind sprints off to the opposite corner… WHERE HE DELIVERS A SHOULDER BLOCK STRAIGHT TO JOHN BLACK’S SKULL!
Both THUGs drop to the mat, agonized.
HHL: Clearly, not the same issues among the ranks of the Misfits! Under Mastermind’s command, they have looked dominant tonight!
Mastermind smiles confidently, admiring the destruction around him…
When he hears a count…
1!
MM spins around!
2!
KRIS VON BONN IS PINNING MARK FLYNN!
Thr-
Desperately, Flynn throws a shoulder up!
HHL: Wow! Von Bonn almost stole his belt back right there!
Von Bonn stands up, hammer in hand, ready to bring it down on Flynn’s skull…
But MM grabs his ally’s wrist! Von Bonn looks furiously at MM!
MM points at the belt, then his own waist! This is his chance!
…
Von Bonn snorts, displeased… But agrees.
Mastermind scoops Flynn up by the scruff of his neck…
But Flynn chops the Kiwi across the chest! Mastermind is driven backwards against the ropes…
Von Bonn goes to swing his Hammah! …But Flynn catches him with a kick to the ribs, driving the air out of his lungs!
Scarlett the Hunteress steps forward… INTO FLYNN’S GRIP! NORTHERN LIGHTS SUPLEX!
Flynn quickly stands back up…
ONLY FOR CRAYZEE CHILDS TO CHOP BLOCK HIS ANKLE…
And…
YES! BITE HIM ON THE LEG ONCE MORE!
HHL: Do you think there’s a chance Cray-zee might give Flynn rabies?
PIP: If Mastermind planned it, I’ll believe anything!
”STOP BITING ME!”
Flynn reels back his foot… AND KICKS CRAYZEE IN THE FACE!
Crayzee rolls backwards, landing on her feet! She looks ready to pounce once more onto the X-Treme champion…
BUT someone grabs her shoulder! Spinning her around!
It’s Tommy Wish! Who delivers a kick to the gut…
FOLLOWED BY HIDEYAFACE! Melanie Crayzee Childs is driven face-first into the mat and rebounds like a ragdoll outside the ring, under the ropes!
…Wish stands back up… Into a waistlock from Scarlet the Hunteress!
PIP: Scarlet, looking to reduce the THUGs in the ring right now…
Scarlet looks for a back suplex!
…But, Tommy tucks his ankle behind hers, blocking the throw… Then, he slips between her legs, crawling backwards…
AND LATCHES ONTO HER ANKLE!
PIP: FETISH LOCK! Wish secures a Fetish lock on Scarlet the Hunteress in the center of the ring!
HHL: As a woman, I am deeply uncomfortable with that move being called a ‘Fetish’ lock.
…
HHL: As a wrestling commentator, I am forced to acknowledge that Tommy has Scarlett LOCKED IN CENTER OF THE RING!
Scarlet beats the mat, in agony! Tommy tightens the hold…
When, WHAM! Wish gets caught with the HAMMAH! Straight to the face!
HHL: Von Bonn rescues The Hunteress with a hammer shot!
PIP: The one weakness of a foot fetishist with an ankle lock for a finisher… Being that close to a foot might give you tunnel vision!
Indeed, Wish looks severely woozy from that blow…
Just as Hunteress springs back to her feet… And sprints across the ring!
RUNNING KNEE STRAIGHT TO WISH’S DOME! Wish goes up and over the top rope!
Hunteress, still agonized from that ankle lock, limps back to a vertical base…
BUT BLACK, from outta nowhere, SCOOPS Hunteress onto his shoulders…
AND DELIVERS BLACKLISTED OVER THE TOP ROPE ONTO THE PADDED CONCRETE!
PIP: OHMYGOD!
Scarlett cradles her back, in terrible agony!
Black dusts his knuckles, like ‘one down’... But, from behind, Von Bonn catches him with a forearm to the back of the head! Von Bonn spins Black around, delivering a hammer to the ribs!
Black leans forward… And Von Bonn locks in a double underhook! Von Bonn leaps up…
HHL: HAMMER TIME!
AND BLACK’S SKULL THUDS AGAINST THE MAT WITH A SICKENING CRACK!
…Von Bonn shoves Black by the shoulder, rolling him under the bottom rope
Von Bonn looks up…
And meets eyes with Mark Flynn!
PIP: Mastermind made clear in his promos for Leap of Faith… Von Bonn is NO FAN of Mark Flynn!
Flynn smiles and waves.
Von Bonn seethes furiously!
He takes his hammer… AND SWINGS…
Flynn ducks!
Von Bonn launches a forward kick!
But Flynn catches his foot!
Flynn holds Von Bonn by the foot, dragging him toward the center of the ring… Von Bonn hops, helplessly trapped in Flynn’s grip!
Von Bonn swings once! Twice with his mighty hammer!...
Unfortunately his legs are longer than his arms, Flynn is safely out of swinging range.
Flynn grins confidently… Just as Estrada climbs back to his feet!
Flynn nods at Reggie, then spins Von Bonn around!
Von Bonn turns… into a kick to the ribs from Estrada! Followed by a stunner! MASHFUL!
Von Bonn springs off Estrada’s shoulder like a pinball before getting knocked outside the ring!
PIP: Holy cow, there’s been so much outside interference… You might’ve forgotten that the three men still in the ring are our original competitors!
Indeed, Flynn leans back against the ropes exhausted… Estrada puts up his dukes, winded but ready to finish this…
Flynn holds up a finger, asking for a moment…
Estrada hesitates…
WHEN FROM BEHIND MASTERMIND GRABS ESTRADA IN A SLEEPER! A MINDSLEEPER!
Estrada’s arms swing wildly, desperate to free himself! But Mastermind’s lock is on tight!
Mastermind eyes Flynn…
…Flynn shrugs, leaning back against the ropes.
HHL: Oh man, after all this chaos, it’s possible Flynn is more amenable to Mastermind’s suggestion! He’s letting MM take out Estrada!
Mastermind snickers boastfully, as he twists his body, squeezing the life out of Estrada’s lungs!
Estrada, like a dying balloon, twists in the wind, to free himself… But, Mastermind spins with him, refusing to release the hold. Giving his back to Flynn!
Just a few more seconds, and Estrada will be out like a liiiiiiiii…
Suddenly, Flynn springs into action! Schoolboy rollup on Mastermind!
Mastermind loses his grip, and gets twisted onto his shoulders!
The official counts!
1!
2!
Mastermind kicks out!
…
A fraction of a second after the THREE!
WINNER AND STILL X-TREME CHAMPION: MARK FLYNN!
Before Mastermind has any time to react to Flynn’s sudden betrayal, Flynn has already rolled under the bottom rope, scooped up his belt, and scrambled back up the ramp!
PIP: What a dirty trick by Mark Flynn! He and Mastermind had clearly non-verbally agreed to take out Reggie first!
HHL: You can take the bad out of ‘Good Guy’ Mark Flynn, but you can’t take the conniving out!
Flynn stands at the top of the ramp and lifts up his belt! Mastermind looks up the ramp in disbelief! The Misfits and the THUGS surround the ring, laying about, looking beaten! It’s a goddamn warzone out here!
HHL: Some people went into this match thinking it would be an easy defense for Flynn, Pip!
PIP: Those people were DEAD wrong, Heather! The Misfits and the THUGS both made sure this was an all-out war! But, Flynn secures the win tonight… And that means…
Points of Authority by Linkin Park Plays
The words "Money Talks" flash on the X-Tron and then a video montage of Theo Pryce plays.
As Flynn stands atop the ramp, holding his X-Treme briefcase, XWF Co-owner Theo Pryce emerges from behind the curtain.
And in his possession…
A 24/7 Briefcase!
HHL: That briefcase gives its bearer the ability to cash in on any champion at any time! It’s a GOLDEN TICKET!
Theo lifts it in his hands, so the audience can see it! They pop, excited to see something so rare be handed over (even if they don’t all like the guy getting it).
…Theo turns toward the X-Treme Champion.
”Mark. I know this briefcase is NOT an easy thing to earn. I remember a few short months ago, the Board deciding to assess and… AUDIT, let’s say… how many matches you’d won as X-Treme champion.”
HHL: Theo’s referring to the XWF Board of Directors’ decision that winning WarGames counted as one defense! And not counting his tag match with Bobby Bourbon!
”And, I remember dreading coming out here to tell you, because… HISTORICALLY, you haven’t responded well when things haven’t gone your way.” Theo clears his throat. ”What with your grandiose accusations of conspiracy and allegations that we’re all out to get you!”
Flynn sneers, angrily at Theo. Theo holds up a hand.
”But! But! I was pleasantly surprised! When you handled the bad news well!” Theo points at Flynn. ”Better than well! You responded by defending the belt against game competitor after game competitor! Some of the best the XWF has to offer! And you did it the right way!”
Theo points at the XWF arena, who are… suddenly clapping?
HHL: Seems like Theo’s praise is opening some hearts and minds to ‘Good Guy’ Mark Flynn!
PIP: Guess that was the answer all along!
Theo points at the audience! ”I understand why some of these people boo you, Mark! After a 12-year career like yours… with your… *ahem* patterns of behavior. It’s hard to earn their trust. But, I wanted to come out here, present this to you, and state for the record…”
Theo smiles… And presses forward the briefcase into Flynn’s hands.
”*I* believe in ‘Good Guy’ Mark Flynn.”
…Flynn looks down at the briefcase.
Then, up at Theo.
A vicious sneer crosses his face… He snaps the mic out of Theo’s hands!
HHL: Oh dear…
PIP: Something about being in Theo’s presence just triggers the absolute worst in Mark Flynn
Flynn snaps the briefcase next to his hip, lifting the mic to his face.
…Theo’s smile starts to turn into a frown, anticipating a barrage of anger and vitriol.
Flynn snorts..
…
…..
”THANK YOU.”
…
”THEO.”
…
”I APPRECIATE… THE SENTIMENT.”
…Flynn nods.
Theo is… truly surprised. He nods, his face returning to a smile…
Before Flynn turns 90 degrees toward the curtain.
…
And walks backstage.
Theo’s left scratching his head… But, looking overall pleased.
HHL: …Wow! Pip! Flynn had an opportunity to gloat about a recent triumph to Theo Pryce’s face and found it in himself not to!
PIP: I NEVER thought I’d see the day!
HHL: But, besides that, Mark Flynn has a 24/7 briefcase! This Relentless season just got a lot more unpredictable!
HHL: Ladies and Gentlemen it is now time for the LEAP OF FAITH MATCH. A match featuring 6 of the XWF's very best in a battle that starts at the bass of the Eiffel Tower all the way up to the tippy top where a 24/7 Briefcase will be dangling for one lucky competitor to grab.
Pip: How the hell are they going to get to the top? The elevator?
HHL: I guess we will find out soon enough. Here's what I do know, as each competitor comes down to the staging area they will be hooked into a safety harness as required by the The Parisian Athletic Commission who is overseeing tonight's event.
Pip: The what?
HHL: I don't exactly know Pip I'm just saying what they told me to. Anyway the first competitor is about to make their entrance so let's get down to the staging area.
"The In Between" By In This Moment plays
Jenny Myst walks onto the scene to a mixed reaction from the crowd. More boos than cheers but wherever Jenny goes she always has her ride or dies there to scream their heads off. Jenny acknowledges them with a smile and a curtsy before making her way to the safety team which starts to strap her into her custom built harness. Created to her specific measurements.
"You Know My Name" by Chris Cornell plays
HHL: Next up we have Ned Kaye. Ned has had a really solid 2023 with some big wins, I am sure he would love nothing more than to be this event's first two time winner.
The area flashes white as spotlights from around the Eiffel Tower converge at the entrance area as "You Know My Name" begins playing bombastically. As the lyrics start, Ned Kaye stands at the point where the spotlights merge to thunderous applause. He lifts his fist up in the air, awaiting the crowd to do the same before rushing down to the staging area, serenaded by blue hues that light up the ramp following his steps. The lights above the stadium darken in their blue color as Ned gets closer to his destination, little bits of ember adorning the X-Tron and entryway, orange breaking up the blue. He walks over to the center of the staging area looking out at the fans, breathing the moment in, and pointing out at the crowd, ready to fight just with their energy alone. Jumping a bit from the adrenaline, he makes his way to the team waiting to attach the harness to him.
Pip: Next up is my pick to win this event. Dolly has been on the cusp of a career defining victory and I think this will be it.
HHL: Could be Pip.
"Ode To Joy - The Dolly Waters Version" Plays
The spotlights rush up toward the sky and Waters appears under the XTron. She marches to the beat of Ode To Joy, the crowd roaring, her gaze set squarely on the staging area where two competitors already wait. Dolly walks over towards the staging area and stands in between Jenny and Ned and raises a single fist into the air before making it over to her area to be strapped in.
Pip: You know H I'm wondering what stops one of these competitors who is already strapped in and just beating the ever living shit out of them?
HHL: Great question Pip. Honor? Respect? Things you wouldn't understand in the slightest.
Pip: Honor and respect are for people who don't actually like winning.
HHL: I don't know Pip. Raion Kido was both honorable and respectful and he was a Universal Champion. A pretty damn good one at that.
Pip: Yeah and where is he now?
...
"Comanche" by the Revels plays
The lights in the area go deep blue as smoke fills the air. Pink and silver laser lights cut through the smoke and it looks fucking rad.
As Comanche blares throughout the area, slowly walking out onto the entrance ramp is Bobby Bourbon. He looks out at the crowd in the area, cold and stoic, surveying his surroundings. He stops and raises his fists at 45 degree angles, and continues his deliberate plod towards the staging area. Bobby walks over to each of the competitors already strapped in and takes a long hard look at each one of them as the lights go back to normal and the music stops.
Bobby then casually strolls over to his custom fit harness and stands there while the team buckles him in.
HHL: You almost got your wish Pip.
Pip: Tease.
"Leaving Dionysus" plays
The lights dim as multiple spotlights rotate throughout the area. As "Leaving Dionysus" begins to play, the spotlights all point to the stage, illuminating a velvet red curtain. At the moment the guitars begin to play, the curtain is drawn open, revealing the imposing figure of Dionysus, holding a Thyrsus in his right hand and a shield on his left arm. He clashes the staff against his shield to rouse the crowd to clap with him, then roars, raising the Thyrsus above his head.
You never had the right,
Removing me from paradise.
Your path removed the light,
Rendering me colour-blind.
But now I’ll speak,
Since I’ve become my own again,
And now I’ll leave,
Since I’ve become my own, again.
Dionysus sets the Thyrsus and shield next to the entrance to the staging area. He blows a kiss over to his opponents and then tells the safety team that he can strap himself in however the safety team yells at him in French and starts rapidly strapping him in before he can do anything about it.
HHL: Any idea what they are saying Pip?
Pip: No fucking clue. Probably something pompous and dumb.
"The King's Affirmation" by Iniko plays
The area falls silent as a spotlight flashes onto the top of the stage, revealing the silhouette of Isaiah King, head bowed and wearing what looks like a leather jacket open at the front. As the base hits the speakers, he raises his head and takes a big breath. He slowly raises his fist into the air and his adoring fans scream in support. His mouth curls into a smile as he starts walking down towards the staging area.
He walks up to a fan wearing his merch, pressing his forehead up to his before continuing his way to the staging area. Once there immediately goes over to his awaiting safety team while staring directly at his rival and one of his opponents tonight Ned Kaye.
HHL: And with that the last competitor is strapped in and ready to go.
Pip: And now a moment too soon.
JENNY MYST
- vs -
NED KAYE
- vs -
DOLLY WATERS
- vs -
BOBBY BOURBON
- vs -
DIONYSUS
- vs -
ISAIAH KING
Match starts in a ring at the base of the Eifel Tower
Winner will be the first person to grab the case attached to the tippy top of the Eifel Tower
Winner receives a XWF 24/7 Briefcase - Good for 1 Year
2rps/3k
HHL: All six competitors are strapped into their safety harnesses!
PIP: This is ridiculous, Heather, since when do competitors in the Leap of Faith match have to get strapped into a harness to prevent death?
HHL: Since when has anyone died in a Leap of Faith match?
PIP: Nevermind that, Heather![/red]
HHL: EU-OSHA and the Parisian Athletic Commission have insisted, Pip. They didn’t want to have to clean up any more dead bodies found at the Eiffel Tower than normal.
[white]PIP: …what’s the normal amount?
The match is underway!
Jenny Myst and Dolly Waters each rush the massive Dionysus!
Ned Kaye and Isaiah King each rush the massive Bobby Bourbon!
Jenny and Dolly Pepper Dio, but Dio has none of it and pitches Dolly over the top rope, where she doesn’t hit the ground but continues to swing away from the ring itself, connected to the Eiffel Tower!
Bobby tosses Isaiah in the same way!
Jenny with a side kick to Dio, who catches the leg, and he hoists Jenny up and throws her over the top rope where she careens around the tower!
Isaiah continues his momentum and actually catches a corner of the Eiffel Tower proper, a grin on his face!
Ned with a right to Bobby! Another vicious right to Bobby! Ned winds up a big third, but Bobby ducks and hoists Ned and pitches him! Ned sways away towards the tower and collides with Dolly!
Jenny Myst catches another corner of the Eiffel Tower, the bungie line securing her having sent her to the structure! She smirks and begins to scale the tower!
Dolly nails Ned with a kick to the stomach! NO! Ned catches it and pushes off, sending he and Dolly careening to corners of the Eiffel Tower.
Inside the Ring, the two big men slowly turn to one another, and neither like what they see.
Dolly collides with the side of the Tower, where she turns and sees Isaiah King! King is posted up on the Tower, feet planted on its side as though he’s rappelling! Dolly plants her feet, and it appears both are standing on the side of the Eiffel Tower!
Ned reaches another side of the base of the Tower. There he meets Jenny Myst! Jenny grabs Ned, and posts him flush against the steel! Using the bungie line, she drives two knees into Ned’s midsection, and then spins with a backflip to land the knees into him again!
HHL: Insult to injury!
PIP: There’s no way to describe what we just saw!
In the ring itself, Bobby and Dio rush one another! A huge right from Bobby!
Dio responds with a right of his own!
Bobby ducks!
SHORYUKEN!
Bobby throws the big roundhouse uppercut at Dio!
NO! Dio ducks! Bobby lands, looking gobsmacked, and Dio connects with Brut Force!
NO! Bobby avoids the final right hook of the combination! Bobby grabs Dio by the throat, setting up for a chokeslam!
Dio grabs Bobby by the throat in turn for a chokeslam!
HHL: Bobby spent time in rural France, but Dio knows all the wine regions of France by heart!
PIP: I prefer a white, Heather.
HHL: I’m partial to reds myself.
Dio plants Bobby with a huge chokeslam! Bobby hasn’t released his grip on Dio though!
On the Tower itself, Dolly connects with King with a calf kick!
Jenny begins to scale the tower, but Ned has come to! He scrambles to keep up with her!
Dio stomps on Bobby, trying to get him to release the grip on his throat!
King hit’s Dolly with a right to the body, and then a left to the body!
Ned catches a hold of Jenny’s ankle, and slows her momentum! He climbs up to her level and grabs a fistful of her head and slams it against the Eiffel Tower!
In the ring, Bobby has grabbed his bungie line and is using it to help him to his feet, still holding Dio by the throat!
Dolly pushes off of the Eiffel Tower, and swings back at King, looking to hit the Ode to Joy!
NO!
King kicks off and swings wide, hurtling through the air around the tower! Dolly connects with the side of the tower and knocks herself out! She slumps and slowly descends to the bottom of the tower, hanging a foot above the ground!
Dio breaks the hold Bobby has on his throat in the ring, and lifts Bobby up with a massive gorilla press!
HHL: Oh my! What raw power from Dionysus!
PIP: Dio is one of the strongest men in the XWF, Heather!
Dio hurls Bobby from the ring, which ultimately causes Bobby to swing on his line towards the Tower!
Jenny kicks off of the Tower, and comes back with a swinging dropkick to Ned, pasting him into the side of the Eiffel Tower! She sneers, and takes a hold of Ned’s line, and curls it around his neck!
Dio looks around, then back up at the tower! He climbs to the apron, and springboards off the second rope to the outside, looking to hit nothing, but his line comes into play and he’s slingshotted towards the Tower!
Jenny kicks at Ned, hoping to cause him to hang himself on his own lifeline! Ned struggles to keep hold of the Tower with one hand while trying to free the line from his own neck!
Isaiah King swoops in with a huge swinging missile dropkick, connecting with Jenny! Jenny is sent flying! King removes the line from around Ned’s neck, then points to his own head, rolling his eyes!
As they look to continue to fight vertically, Jenny Myst is swinging back into them with a double clothesline! Both men halt the attack, catching Jenny!
Ned and King with a double DDT to Jenny against the side of the Eiffel Tower!
Jenny is sent backwards off the structure, but is caught by Dionysus midair, who brings her back up against the tower with a huge facecrusher!
Ned and King look at one another, knowingly. As they do, Bobby Bourbon appears from just below them, and grabs both their feet! Bobby posts against the Eiffel Tower and hurls them off, sending them swinging in opposite sides of the Tower!
Dio begins to scale the Tower as Jenny clings on!
Ned and King catch one another on the opposite side of the Tower, and then kick off back around it!
Dio has reached the first platform, and climbs the railing to gain his bearings. As he does, his safety line becomes shorter.
HHL: Pip, Dionysus, the former Television Champion, is the first to reach the first platform of the Eiffel Tower!
PIP: That’s right, Heather. In accordance, his line is now being reeled so he can no longer fall further than this point! Stupid OSHA!
Bobby scales up and is on the platform on the other side! Bobby again looks at Dio.
Dio eyes Bobby.
Neither likes what the other sees.
They charge one another like two bulls, but as they do, both men are intercepted by King and Ned!
Ned with The Disciplinary Action to Dio, leaping off the railing of the first platform!
King with a Crown Shatterer to Bobby also leaping off of the railing!
Ned climbs a bit of the Tower and flies, landing a shooting star press onto Dio!
King goes to a corner of the first platform and retrieves his wrench, grinning! Bobby is slow to get to his feet, and King rushes in, cracking Bobby in the skull with it! Bobby slumps, his forehead busted wide open, gushing blood onto the platform. King approaches Dio with the wrench.
Ned stops King!
HHL: Ned is infuriated that King hid a weapon up here!
PIP: Ned should be grateful, King might have just put Bobby out of commission permanently!
Ned grabs the wrench from King, scolding him. King half shrugs, and Ned hurls the wrench over the side of the Tower.
Jenny, having come to her wits, catches it. She scales over the railing to the first platform. Both Ned and King look at each other, then at Jenny. They rush her, but Jenny steps to the outside of them, cracking King in the head with the wrench! King falls to the floor, bleeding!
Ned looks down in horror, then up at Jenny, enraged.
With that, the elevator chimes. Dio, who is slowly getting up, along with Ned and Jenny look over.
Dolly Waters emerges from the elevator! She looks to do damage, and an official arrives and attaches another fresh bungie line to her!
Jenny with a sneak shot with the wrench onto Ned’s midsection, doubling him over! She brings the wrench up, looking to bring it down and execute Ned!
Dio catches the wrench! He then nails Jenny with On Your Shield!
As he does, Dolly rushes in and hits the Running Waters on Ned, sending him to the floor! Dolly pivots, and she and Dio catch sight of each other.
Dio hurls the wrench off the side of the Eiffel Tower.
HHL: Look out below!
The wrench lands smack between Heather and Pip.
PIP: God almighty!
Dio smirks. Dolly with a calf kick to Dio! Dio responds with a big forearm, then plants her with a spinebuster! Dio then picks Dolly up…
GRAPEVINE!
Dolly is knocked out again! Dio begins to scale the side of the Eiffel Tower!
Ned has recovered, and begins to attend to King! King is coming back to his senses, his face a crimson mask. Jenny rushes in and connects with a diving cross body to the duo, looking to surprise them!
NO! Both King and Ned catch Jenny! They look to one another, trying to figure out what to do next with her!
Bobby rushes in and throws a cross body block onto them as they hold Jenny, pancaking all three!
Bobby slowly stands, his face red from his own blood, his menacing glare causing him to look like an actual demon. He slowly glances up at Dio, and snarls. Bobby begins scaling the Eiffel Tower!
Dio reaches the second platform, and his line is reeled, not letting him fall past this point. He looks back down over the edge of the Tower, then back up. Dio cracks his neck, readying to continue to climb.
With that, the elevator chimes on the second platform. Out steps Dolly. Officials immediately secure her with a fresh line.
HHL: How is Dolly doing this?
PIP: It’s the mysticism of the divines, Heather!
HHL: Dionysus is a god!
PIP: It’s a schism at the Eiffel Tower!
Dio rolls his eyes. Dio rushes at Dolly, but Dolly counters with a drop toe hold, using the big man’s momentum against him!
NO! Dio simply stops and doesn’t fall, looking back down at Dolly as he does! He reaches down and lifts Dolly up for a Chokeslam!
NO! Dio is cut off by a chop block by Bobby Bourbon! Bobby helps Dolly up to her feet! As he does, Bobby is caught by Jenny with a Thesz Press!
Jenny is swiftly caught with a Notorious Knee from Ned as she mounts Bobby for punches!
King in with purpose at Dolly! King leaps at the last moment…
GUILLOTINE OF DESTRUCTION!
Dolly is planted into the hard floor, and is out of it!
King stands, and moves to assist Ned, but is cut off by Dio, who throws a left body blow to King! King blocks! Both men begin to box on the second platform!
Ned looks over at Bobby, who is slowly getting to his feet, and his ire is obvious on his forehead alone. Ned with a superkick to Bobby!
NO! Bobby catches the boot and hooks the leg, hoisting Ned up and planting him with the Richter Spike!
King and Dio circle one another. King with a right jab, but Dio’s head movement is too swift, and Dio counters with a left body blow! King steps back, getting his guard back up, and Dio closes, pressing his size advantage! Dio with an overhand right to King, catching him with it. King tries to close some of the distance, but the reach advantage and fighting up is too much! Dio with another solid jab scoring in on King!
Having had enough boxing, Jenny rushes in and catches Dio with a tilt-a-whirl headscissors, sending him to the ground. She then stands and looks at the weary King, who’s barely getting his hands up in front of him. She blows him a kiss.
Bobby stands, and begins to scale to the top of the Eiffel Tower. King points up at Bobby, but Jenny takes advantage of the distraction, kicking King right in the groin!
King smiles!
Jenny looks baffled and hauls off with another groin kick!
King begins to laugh!
HHL: Either Isaiah King has a secret we don’t know or he has some weird kinks!
PIP: That would be a secret we don’t want to know.
Jenny goes again, and stops, her foot in actual pain! King reaches into his trunks, and pulls out a protective cup! Jenny looks mortified!
Then Jenny kicks King in the nuts with the other foot.
King crumples to the floor, and Jenny begins scaling the Eiffel Tower after Bobby! Ned is up and he’s scaling the Tower from another corner, and Dio is also scaling it from a third!
Jenny catches up to Bobby and rakes her nails into the wound on his forehead, causing more blood to flow from his forehead! Once again, Jenny wrings a lifeline around her opponent’s neck, this time Bobby’s! She throws all of her weight into a back elbow, sending Bobby flying, who dangles, hanging by his own lifeline from the Eiffel Tower! Bobby screams and struggles at the line around his neck, blood pouring out onto his chest! Jenny begins to scale to the top of the Tower.
Atop the highest point of the Eiffel Tower, Jenny stands alone. She looks down at Dio and Ned still climbing up, at Bobby dangling like a worm on a hook, and at Isaiah, cradling his nether region. She smiles, knowing this was all hers. She turns and looks.
There are three briefcases all attached to a boom stuck to the aerial atop the Eiffel Tower. She looks furious.
HHL: Jenny is the first to the top of the tower, Pip!
PIP: Decoy briefcases! Jenny is getting screwed here, Heather!
Jenny looks angrily at all three cases, then back down at Dio and Ned, who are almost at the pinnacle of the Eiffel Tower! Jenny mutters a swear under her breath, then flies towards one of the cases, grabbing it! Her line lets her drift back to the second platform!
Jenny stands, looking up at Dio and Ned, then down at King! She grins!
Jenny undoes the first latch!
Jenny undoes the second latch!
Jenny opens the case!
Pigeons fly out of it!
Infuriated, Jenny hurls the decoy case from the second platform and begins her ascent again!
Dio has reached the top of the Tower simultaneously with Ned! Both men look spent, and Dio throws a huge cracking back chop to Ned!
Ned has none of it! He asks for more!
Dio with another overhand chop to Ned, and a bolt of lightning strikes off in the distance!
Ned pumps his fists, and in defiance looks up at Dio, telling him to bring it!
Dio with another huge chop, but Ned catches it and tosses Dio’s hand away!
HHL: HE’S NEDDING OUT!
Ned with a body blow, followed by a thigh kick, followed by a spinning backfist, followed by another spinning backfist! Dio, lit up by Ned, looks dazed! Lightning strikes off in the distance yet again, and yet again, the elevator chimes! Ned stops, and Dio looks curiously as the elevator doors open.
Dolly Waters stands in the elevator car, but crumples to the ground, her hand outstretched and pointing to one of the briefcases.
Ned notices and then looks at the briefcase Dolly was pointing at! Ned swiftly hoists Dio up…
THE EGO DEATH!
As the move lands, a slight drizzle begins overhead, and lightning strikes somewhere off in the distance, followed by the thunder. Ned looks out to the briefcase and takes a breath.
At that moment, Jenny is on the top of the Tower again! She grabs Ned, and hooks his neck! She kisses his forehead…
MYST OPPORTUNITIES!
NO!
Before she can connect with the move, the massive hand of Bobby Bourbon has grabbed Jenny by the ankle from off the side of the top of the Tower, and she is pulled off of it! Jenny careens downward, her own lifeline around her neck this time, and she’s stuck dangling!
Ned catches his breath, looking in horror at Bobby, who climbs atop the Eiffel Tower, his face caked with blood, his hulking frame heaving. Lighting strikes again, followed by the deafening thunder that the storm was near.
Bobby lurches towards Ned, but Ned thinks better of it, and leaps!
NO!
Bobby grabs Ned bungie line! Bobby pulls Ned back up to him!
Ned uses the bungie line to slingshot himself onto Bobby, looking to throw a hurricanrana!
Lightning strikes.
Bobby catches Ned, and doesn’t budge. Until he does.
BOBBYBOMB!
Ned is planted into the top of the Eiffel Tower, and left helpless atop it beside Dio! Bobby looks down at Dolly’s outstretched arm, and takes a running leap towards the briefcase she’s pointing at!
Bobby catches the briefcase, and then lands back on the second platform!
Bobby unlatches the first latch.
He unlatches the second.
Bobby opens the case.
Revealing the 24/7 contract.
Winner of a new 24/7 Briefcase - BOBBY BOURBON!!!
Meanwhile, over in the X-Treme Title hallway… A door to the champion’s dressing room is pushed open.
”AFTER SO MUCH WORK, Irwin!”
…The camera creeps over Flynn’s shoulder from behind, where he’s admiring his briefcase in the mirror!
”AFTER SO MANY MATCHES, SO MANY AMBUSHES, SO MUCH CLIMATE CHANGE RESEARCH AND HAM SANDWICHES … I have it! I HAVE THE 24/7 BRIEFCASE!”
Irwin nods proudly beside his wrestling hero.
”Absolutely, Mister Flynn! Well done! A triumph, pure and simple!”
Flynn breathes the air deeply, taking in this moment.
”God DAMN, I’m good.”
Irwin nods. ”...So. What’s the plan now?”
”Oh, well in eight minutes, I’m hitting the ring!”
…
”What?!? B-b-but, that’s when the Uni match starts!”
”Yup. I’m swinging down to the ring. Hovering over ol’ Corey’s shoulder. Hell, I might as well just stand in his corner, looooooooming until his match wraps.”
”...I suppose, there would be an element of surprise, cashing in immediately after you win! No one would expect you to do the most predictable thing! Brilliant, Mister Flynn!”
…
Flynn scoffs.
”I’m not cashin’ in, tonight, Ir-dawg.”
…
”What?”
”Oh, sure, I’m going to let everyone THINK I’m cashing in on Corey… Because I’m going to use this briefcase to do to Corey… What Corey did to me.”
”ELIMINATE HIS CONTROL OVER THE NARRATIVE.”
Flynn spits on the ground.
”Relentless 2021. I wrestled Thaddeus Duke… In what was supposed to be my MAGNUM OPUS! My greatest work!”
…
”And after a one-hour ironmatch! Rated FIVE STARS by the critics… It was IMMEDIATELY forgotten… because Corey Smith ran down to the ring. With one of these goddamned briefcases.”
”And erased me from the story. That match would forever go down in history as the first chapter of Thaddy Duke versus his best friend Corey.”
”I BECAME A FOOTNOTE IN MY OWN MASTERPIECE.”
…Flynn grins insidiously!
…
As the camera starts… zooming out?
”And now… At Corey’s first title defense? I’m going to hover! I’m going to LOOM!”
The cameraman continues to backpedal further and further from Flynn…
”Until Corey Smith loses all control of his story. No one is going to care about Corey Smith’s first title defense performance… All the headlines will read… ‘WHEN WILL MARK FLYNN STRIKE?!?’”
Until it’s outside the door.
”Wow. That sounds… *cough* kinda-sorta… petty?”
”DAMN RIGHT IT IS! AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME!”
…Outside the dressing room, a blacked glove hand pushes the door closed.
”...You hear that, Ir-dawg?”
”...Was it the door?”
Another hand, also hidden in a glove, extends a padlock… And clasps it around the handle.
Suddenly, the handle jimmies up and down!
”It’s locked!”
”UNLOCK IT!”
”Our side IS unlocked, sir! Someone put another lock on the other side of the door!”
”...No. You can’t do this to me!”
SLAM! A FIST CRASHES ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE DOOR!
…The camera pans further backwards..
”YOU CAN’T TAKE THIS FROM ME!”
Despite Flynn’s protests and fists…
The camera only continues to reel backwards…
And as the door gets smaller and smaller.
”NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”
The scene fades to black.
Twenty midgets with sparkers in both hands held as high as their little arms can reach, line both sides of the entrance ramp. Thunder Knuckles walks out with his Xtreme Championship over his shoulder, an arrogant smile emblazoned on his face, and bobbing his head back and forth to the music. The sparkers ignite as he walks past the midgets. Once Thunder Knuckles is down to the ring he rolls under the bottom rope and in one movement he pops up to his feet. With his back turned towards the camera, he raises his right fist in defiance. As soon as his fist goes up, counterfeit XBUX with Thunder Knuckles' face on them falls onto the crowd.
Thunder Knuckles gets in the ring, but he’s got a microphone with him.
Thunder Knuckles: Alright, bring the little shit out here. I got something to say and I wanna say it to his face.
Pip: Love the fire from Thunder Knuckles. Get him TK!
The arena is pitch black and the melancholy opening tunes to “Identity” begin. But as the song starts to pick up in intensity, down in the entry way, you see a Jericho-esque light up jacket glow brilliantly. Then, twin explosions emit from either side of the ramp and the lights turn on in a swirling red and blue pattern that throb in sync with the beats of the song. Corey comes down the ramp, the jacket now flashing intermittent heart and lightning bolt patterns. On the 'Tron you see images of Corey/Lux pulling off fantastic moves, intercut with blur effects on Corey's face that obscure his features in an eerie way.
Corey gets halfway up the ramp when Thunder Knuckles calls out to him.
Thunder Knuckles: That’s far enough, Corey.
Corey, Universal championship slung over his shoulder, looks confused but nonetheless seems interested in what the challenger has to say.
Thunder Knuckles: You know, there was a lot of scuttlebutt about why I got this match. Why the “King of the Midcard” (fuck you, Cent) somehow meritied a shot at the Universal Championship. And the answer is simple.
I demanded it.
I demanded to face you, Corey. And Theo must have been impressed with my passion because I stand here, having got what I wanted.
But there’s more to it than that. So much more.
You see, I hate you, you smug little shit. I fucking hate you. You think you’re untouchable. You think you’re unkillable. You just got this insufferable aura about you that makes me wanna PUKE. And the worst part of it all? I accepted that goddamn money from you at War Games. Yeah…yeah…I know it was my goddamn fault. And I haven’t heard the end of it since then. But I keep thinking back to that moment, you with that shit eating grin passing me those bills. That shit eating grin. That FUCKING GRIN. And for the first time in my life I am pissed I took the money! I shoulda started swinging. I shoulda fought you. Because that’s what people have been saying…what YOU’VE been saying…that I took the cash to save face because I knew I couldn’t beat you.
But I CAN beat you. And that’s why I demanded this match. I want a redo on War Games. I want a doever and god fucking damn it I deserve it!
But I also wanted to hurt you.
So I did.
The camera focuses on Corey’s face, which has taken on a stony countaennance.
In the ring, Thunder Knuckles just chuckles, running a hand through his hair and pacing the ring.
Thunder Knuckles: I burnt your house, Corey.
Pip: Holy shit!
HHL: I don't know what to say Pip. This is a stunning revelation.
The fan eruption is instantaneous and irate. Boos reign down on TK like a storm.
Thunder Knuckles: I BURNT DOWN YOUR HOME YOU LITTLE SHIT!
Corey wastes no time, he grabs a metal folding chair from ringside and just as the bell rings to start the match he rolls in the ring with it. It’s unclear if Corey even realizes the match has started, his face is an expressionless void. The ref is yelling, the fans are still reacting, and TK still has the mic held up to his smirking mug.
Thunder Knuckles: You gonna hit me? Do it you little bi-!
Corey lands an echoing chair shot across the top of TK’s head! TK goes down and the ref signals for the bell declaring that the match is already over!!
Pip: My boy TK with the Win over the Universal Champion!
HHL: Yeah but it's a DQ Pip. The title doesn't change hands with a DQ!
The Winner of the Match By Disqualification-THUNDER KNUCKLES
But Corey is far from done. He raises the chair up again, murder written in his eyes. But the referee comes up from behind Corey and grabs the chair from him! Corey wheels about to face him, looking irate. The ref begins to chastise the champ….and Corey lays out the ref with a haymaker! Some of the fans respond in shock!
Corey returns his attention to TK, who is still prone but leaning up against the ropes and flipping Corey off! Corey lunges for him but Thunder Knuckles rolls out of the ring in a hurry. Then, he gallops towards the crowd control barricade and slips over it, headed into the crowd. But Corey takes off in pursuit! The champ plunges into the crowd, ignoring any attempts to interact with them. And finally he catches up to TK. The two of them start trading right hands, with TK eventually getting the advantage and rocking Corey just long enough to continue his escape.
Thunder Knuckles disappears from the camera’s view only to reappear in the corridor. He looks around to see if Corey is following, and Corey also explodes into the hallway, running into TK and spearing him to the ground! Corey starts lighting TK up, but TK is eventually able to throw him off and scramble up to his feet. Corey follows him doggedly until finally catching him in front of an XWF merch stand. Corey attacks TK again, clotheslining him up and over the counter into the stand. Corey hops the counter and lands on top of TK where they again start to scuffle.
TK fights his way to his feet and grabs Corey by the back of the head, slamming it into a metal shirt display and causing it to fall over. Corey responds with an elbow to TK’s gut, followed by a headbutt! Corey hurls TK Back over the counter but not before grabbing a t-shirt. Once Corey is back over the counter he wraps the shirt around TK’s throat and starts to choke him. Pure hatred encompasses Corey’s face as he does this.
But just then, an XWF security team enters en masse. The security team swarms Corey, pulling him off of Thunder Knuckles. But Corey still won’t stop! He starts fighting back against the security, throwing wild punches and kicks until they are forced to back off. Corey then grabs hold of TK’s hair and wrenches him to his feet, dragging him down the hall. But TK still has fight in him, and he starts to punch at Corey until Corey breaks his hold. TK then throws Corey into the wall, cracking it!
Thunder Knuckles takes this opportunity to try to escape again. He finally reaches an escalator going down to the first floor. But Corey is again in hot pursuit! He catches TK at the top of the escalator and they start once again trading blows as they ride the escalator down. Corey bounces TK’s head off the railing, TK replies with an elbow to Corey’s gut and an uppercut. Corey seems to be on the ropes, but then he blocks another shot from TK and kicks him in the kneecap causing him to tumble down the escalator the rest of the way.
TK arrives at the bottom of the escalator looking worse for the wear but still gets vertical. But he does so only to be met by a flying clothesline from Corey as he leaps off the escalator! Corey starts stomping the hell out of Thunder Knuckles when even more security grunts enter the fray. They try to pull Corey away from TK but he still has enough in the tank to fight them off.
Thunder Knuckles gets to his feet but looks wobbly. He spots a fan passing by with a drink in their hand. Thunder Knuckles grabs the drink and hurls it into Corey’s face. TK then looks to put even more road between himself and the champ. Finally pausing in front of a food vendor. Corey stays on him, nailing TK with a diving takedown. Corey then grabs a bottle of ketchup off the counter and squirts it all over TK’s face, taking the time to mash it further into his eyes with his hands. TK rolls over, trying to get the ketchup out of his eyes.
It’s then that an even bigger security team arrives on the scene . This time, they pile on Corey and manage to drag Corey off. Corey lands a side kick to one of them before three more pull him to the ground and dog pile him. They hold the champion down as he feverishly tries to escape.
TK gets to his feet, still rubbing ketchup out of his eyes.
Thunder Knuckles: Fuck you, Corey! Go fuck yourself!
Corey: You’re done, TK! I will find you and sort you out you son of a bitch!
Thunder Knuckles: You want to keep the pain train coming asshole?! Hey, you got it! How about you see me again at Relentless, and this time it’ll be no disqualification!
Corey grunts as he tries to fight back against the security team, but they have him well and pinned down this time.
Corey Smith: Oh, you stupid asshole. You stupid, stupid asshole. You just signed your death certificate!
Thunder Knuckles: Yeah, we’ll see about that.
TK then proceeds to lean in and spit on Corey’s head! This causes Corey to surge anew with rage fueled energy, but the security team is still able to keep him down. But now, a couple members of the team break off and go to Thunder Knuckles, urging him to step away. TK smirks and complies but can’t resist a parting shot.
Thunder Knuckles: Relentless, Corey! Relentless! The wunderkid goes down for good!
As the security team leads Thunder Knuckles away the shot closes in on Corey’s despondent face as security continues to hold him down, and then the shot fades to black.
HHL: Well there you have it folks after that explosive...
Pip: Nice pun Heather!
HHL: Not intentional Pip but thank you nonetheless. But after that revelation by Thunder Knuckles, Corey Smith and T.K will run it back at Relentless.
Pip: TK is gonna take that belt from Corey. Believe that.
HHL: We'll see Pip. In the meantime we will see everyone in two weeks for Weekend Warfare!!!
Special Thanks To The Match Writers
BOB D
Bobby Bourbon
Corey Smith
Mark Flynn
Charlie Nickles
To the other people who survived what went down at the Eiffel Tower...
...get bent. You all bullied Dolly, and as far as I'm concerned I still owe Dionysus an ass whooping for Chokeslamming me.
That's maneuver infringement!
But past that..
Mark!
Bobby holds up his version of the 24/7 briefcase. It's coated with dried up flecks of blood. Bobby grins, his teeth still reddened but contrasting the crimson mask he's still wearing. A medic approaches Bobby attempting to attend to his wound but is shoved away.
Mark.
Use your briefcase.
I dare you!
The following 3 users Like Prof. Bobby Bourbon's post:3 users Like Prof. Bobby Bourbon's post B.O.B. D (07-31-2023), Mark Flynn (07-31-2023), Theo Pryce (07-31-2023)
Also a big shoutout to the match writers for this show. I originally forgot to include a little thank you box at the end of the show but it's been added to the results now. My bad fellas. You all did great work with the matches. Thank you.
The following 1 user Likes Theo Pryce's post:1 user Likes Theo Pryce's post B.O.B. D (07-31-2023)
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RE: XWF Presents: Leap of Faith 2023 -->
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