Special Bad Medicine Opening Match 11-25-21 BOBBY BOURBON - vs - MATT KNOX Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade Match This match will take place on a special Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade float Win by Pinfall Results for this match will be posted live while the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade is happening Savage rules

The scene opens to what was a LIVE stream of the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade being filmed from the sidewalk. The camera pans around the crowd and to Heather Hallowell and Pip Collins standing side-by-side, ready to announce the action!

Heather is dressed in a lady pilgrim costume and Pip is dressed as an Indian equipped with war paint and a couple of feathers sticking up behind his head.

HHL: “Hello everyone and welcome to the opening match for XWF’s Bad Medicine!! I’m Heather Hallowell…”

PIP: “How, Heather! I am Crazy Pony!”

HHL: “Crazy Pony?”

PIP: “Yeah. Like Crazy Horse?”

HHL: “I get it. But, Pip..”

PIP: “Crazy Pony.”

HHL: “Don’t you think your costume is a little…”

PIP: “Over the top? It IS awfully cold out… I could use a jacket.”

Heather goes cross-eyed and stares back at the camera. Beside the two, just off-camera, is XWF Head of Security, Little Feather, shedding a single tear.

HHL: “We are patiently waiting, fans, for the arrival of the XWF float, which is basically a moving ring… And we will be following along with the action the best we can! Who better than to have in the match?”

PIP: “The No Good Bastard, himself, Bobby Bourbon taking on newcomer Matt “The Raven” Knox! Now, wouldn’t it have been smarter to provide us with a float, too, Heather? Rather than trying to keep up with this thing?”

HHL: “The XWF works in mysterious ways, Pip!”

Pip and Heather are stationed at the very start of the parade, where a large group of New York’s finest ride in on motorcycles followed by the first initial Macy’s floats. After a while and a short break, the Hampton Marching Force strolls by.

PIP: “So, when exactly is this float supposed to get here?”

HHL: “Soon enough! You can barely contain the excitement, can you?”

30 Minutes Later…

The Go Bowling.com scene now approaches. A 14 foot-tall bowling ball followed by ten 16 foot-tall bowling pins then two bowling shoes come walking down the parade route. A chorus of screams can be heard as a Ford F-150 pulling a ring float that’s pulling another little float screeches onto the scene. The walking bowling pins scatter everywhere!

PIP: “There they are! STRIKE!”

HHL: “What an entrance! Now, we just need the competitors!”

Heather is correct as the ring is rolling down the parade route with just Head Official Chaz Bobo standing in the center of it. Time Keeper Nipsey Russel has a small float and where he has his time keeping desk following the ring float. Rolling up on a motorcycle is the first competitor of the match, Matt “The Raven” Knox!

He parks the bike alongside the road and it’s taken immediately by an XWF Official. Knox jogs up to the float and rolls into the ring.

PIP: “Now where’s Bourbon?”

HHL: “Wait a minute… Do you hear that?!”

The thudding from the rudder of a helicopter can be heard and soon enough is lowering itself down between the buildings on the street.

HHL: “Oh you’ve gotta be kidding me!”

A rope ladder lowers from the chopper and out comes Bobby Bourbon! It lowers enough for him to step off the ladder and into the ring! As the helicopter takes off, it disrupts the Super Saiyan Goku float and lifts it higher into the air! Several of the little Saiyans holding the float let go, but those that don’t get to fly through the air as the Goku float flies off track and into a building!

PIP: “Wow! This match hasn’t even started yet and the XWF has already caused some disarray!”

HHL: “That’s an understatement, Pip.. I hope those people are alright…”

PIP: “They’re Saiyans! Of course they are!”

Bobby Bourbon and Matt Knox are now nose to nose in the ring as Chaz Bobo steps between them. He sends them to their respective corners and signals for the bell!

DING DING DING

The bell sounds and the two big men charge the center of the ring! They lock up to a stale-mate and push away from each other. They move in again and the brute strength from each of the men is still not enough to overtake the other and they shove away again. They circle the center of the ring, Bobby Bourbon takes a bounce off the ropes to test them out and continues until they make a full circle. They tie up again and Bourbon is able to trap Knox in a strong headlock. Knox takes Bourbon to the ropes, bounces him off, and sends him across the ring. Bourbon bounces back and the two of them meet in the center with two big shoulders that again just makes a thunderclap but does nothing to either man.

Knox gives Bourbon a nod, but isn’t given one back. Instead, Bourbon lands a swift kick to Knox’s midsection and lifts him up in the air in a vertical suplex! The 6’6 man slams flat on his back and reaches around in pain. Bourbon wastes little time and goes right after his opponent by grabbing him by the head and bringing him straight to his feet. He Irish whips Knox across the ring and lowers himself in wait, but Knox flips over Bourbon and rolls him up for the first pin attempt!





ONE!!














TWO!!!












HHL: “Bourbon kicks out after two!”

Knox gets up and brings Bourbon half way up with him, only to plant him straight back down with a DDT! Knox picks up Bourbon and takes him over to the corner and starts peppering jabs into Bourbon’s face who just holds the top two ropes for balance as he takes each blow. Knox steps up to the middle rope and lands two more closed fists to the top of Bobby Bourbon’s skull before stepping down and running to the opposite corner. He measures Bourbon up from the opposite side and takes off running back!

PIP: “Oh this could be big!”

Knox lifts the leg, looking for a Little Drop of Poison… His trademark running boot! But Bourbon saw him coming and moved out of the way! Knox’s leg wrapped around the top turnbuckle and he got stuck straddling it for a moment…

HHL: “Ouch! The man is tall, but if only he was a little taller!”

He manages to pull his leg back over the rope just to be clotheslined to the outside! His head smacks off the apron and he falls to the road!

PIP: “It looks like they’re going to take this fight to the streets, Heather!”

Bourbon exits the ring, runs across the apron, and leaps off the side of it landing an elbow on Knox!

HHL: “Man I bet that hurt Bobby just as bad as it hurt Matt Knox… Bobby’s hip took all of the road on that one…”

It didn’t seem to affect the Bastard at all. He got straight to his feet and picked Knox up along with him. They stray away from the ring float and to the one that is slowly catching up to them.

HHL: “Oh no… I think the XWF is breaching another float….”

It’s the Olay float where the K-pop band Aespa is performing! Bourbon drags Knox through the crowd in front and slams him against the float! It knocks a couple of the performers down and the other two scurry away to safety. The two men exchange a couple of punches before Knox regains the advantage. He lifts up the near 300 pounds Bastard and body slams him down onto the Olay float. He climbs up on it then gets his legs taken out from under him and Bourbon trips him up. The float is made up of a platform where the band was performing and behind it is a giant head and upper torso. Knox takes a couple of steps and spears Bourbon through the chest and they both go through it and fall out of it back to the street destroying the float!



PIP: “I hate K-pop.”

Both men lie on the street and are finally getting rallied back to the ring by the official.

HHL: “Someone is definitely walking away with road rash.”

The two men separately begin staggering back towards the XWF float with Chaz Bobo tailing them. A group of clowns are passing them by, trying their best to avoid the two giant men beating the hell out of each other, but Bourbon manages to grab hold of one. He lifts the clown over his head and throws it like a javelin towards his opponent! Knox catches the clown right in the chest knocking him down!

PIP: “Clown abuse!”

Knox shoves the clown off of him, but the attack causes several other clowns to target the No Good Bastard! Some squirt him with water, some attack him with balloon swords, and the rest attack with whatever they can! Bourbon defends one attack and clocks the first clown! He takes two others and cracks their heads together! One jumps on his back… Bourbon pulls him around and Bobby-Bombs the clown straight down to the street breaking him in half! In the meantime, Knox had enough time to gather himself back up and line up an attack on Bobby! He runs over and just as Bourbon faces him, he lands a running boot across the Bastard’s face!

HHL: “There it is! A Little Drop of Poison! Bourbon is out cold!”

PIP: “Yeah, but NOW he has to get a 290 pound Bobby Bourbon back in the ring where he can legally pin him!”

The clowns all gather around Bobby and it takes ten of them but they lift him up and start carrying him to the ring. The clowntourage rolls Bourbon into the ring under the bottom rope where Matt Knox is already waiting and falls on his opponent!



ONE!!!!













TWO!!!!
















HHL: “Another kick out by Bourbon!”

PIP: “Bobby better quit clowning around!”

Bourbon manages to roll away after the kick out. Knox follows up with a couple of kicks to his head, but they don’t seem to phase him. Bobby continues working towards his feet as his opponent continues to pound down with fists and forearms….

HHL: “Is Bobby hulking up?”

Bourbon finally manages to block one of the blows and strike back! Knox stumbles back one step but then attacks again! But it’s blocked! Bourbon lands another countering blow! Knox again fights back but it’s blocked again! Bourbon fires back with one, then two, then a third shot! He takes a bounce from the ropes and picks Knox up in a bear hug! He rushes to the corner and slams him….. Then leaps in the air landing an Oklahoma Bear Hug Slam!


PIP: “That’s HONESTLY BRUTAL!!!”

HHL: “Bobby Bourbon with the big slam here! This could be it.. He covers and pulls the leg!”





ONE!!!
























TWO!!!!!!



































PIP: “NO!”

HHL: “Kick out by Knox! This match continues!!”

Bourbon spits on the mat and grabs Knox by the back of the head. Knox immediately starts fighting back by landing a couple of punches to the midsection of his opponent! Bobby shoves Knox back down, but he rolls through back to his feet and attacks Bobby! He lands a fist across the chest sending the big man back against the ropes! The two of them are fighting at the front of the float where it is hitched to the truck ahead. Bourbon slips through the middle rope and lands on the apron as Knox continues to land kicks to his chest. Knox meets him on the outside and Bourbon continues to take the kicks but manages to fight them off and reach his feet. Knox goes for a high kick to Bourbon’s head, but it’s caught! Bobby Bourbon throws the leg down, grabs Knox around the torso, and belly-to-belly suplexes him into the bed of the truck!

HHL: “WOAH!!!”

PIP: “Look out!”

The truck buckles at the five hundred some pounds that slammed onto the back of it. Half of the bed breaks off from the cab and sparks fly all around as the float begins to drive uncontrollably down the parade path at 5 mph. The driver bails on the vehicle and the crowd ahead scatters as the truck pulls the float off the road and into the Central Park fence alongside the road and stops.

HHL: “This match is getting out of hand. I would hate to be sitting next to Jefferson Jackson watching this…”



The two competitors jumps off each side of the truck and stumble over, past the ring, and back out onto the street just in time for the Brownsberg High School Marching Band.

HHL: “Oh God no.”

Bourbon walks over to a tuba player, grabs the instrument from the kid, and turns around to get a road cone thrown at his face by Matt Knox!!

HHL: “These are kids people!”

PIP: “Yeah! Think of the children!”




Bourbon swats the road cone away and as Knox gets to him he cracks him with the tuba bending the horn all wonky. He takes it up overhead and slams it down on the back of Knox! The marching band DISbands and scatters through the street! Before Bourbon can make another move, he is attacked from behind!!!

HHL: “What’s this?!?!”

PIP: “The clowns are back!”

The clowns that Bourbon had the battle with before attacked again and in a group surrounded him and started beating him down! There seems to be more clowns than before joining in on taking him down! By the numbers, they emerge out of the crowd and hop on the dog pile that has Bobby Bourbon under the whole thing! He disappears in the mass of clowns and looks to be done for as Knox begins to recuperate after the blows from the heavy brass instrument!

Suddenly, the mountain of clowns on Bourbon explodes! Red noses and wigs fly everywhere as the No Good Bastard emerges! Knox breathes heavy as he runs in to attack, but is blind-sided as Bourbon baseball bat swings one of the clowns and smashes Knox in the side of the head! Bourbon grabs two clowns at once and delivers a double chokeslam! He rips through the crowd more and more as Head Official Chaz Bobo AND the NYPD try to break the clowns away from the competitors!!!


HHL: “THIS IS PURE PANDEMONIUM!!”

PIP: “I can’t even keep track who is who anymore!”

HHL: “Oh knock it off Pip!”

Finally the clowns get separated and the ring float is back on the road!

HHL: “Well it looks like the float is back in the parade, Pip! Pip? Hey?? Where’d you go?!”

Inside the cab of the truck we can see two little feathers sticking up and Pip Collins behind the wheel of the once thought disabled Ford truck! Sparks fly behind the cab as the ring is once again in motion and the competitors have found their way back to the ring! They enter together and Bourbon takes the first swing, missing a clothesline! Knox bounces back nailing Bourbon under the chin with a super kick! Bourbon falls into the ropes, but then charges back and catches Knox with another bear hug! Bobby squeezes the life out of Knox who manages to fight back with blows to Bourbon’s thick neck! One after another until Bourbon finally releases the hold!

HHL: “Well it appears that I’ve been left to commentate this match on my own, fans! And what a match it has been!”

Knox fights off Bourbon into the corner and starts pelting him with kicks again, but Bourbon manages to block a couple and change positions! He delivers a fury of punches to the gut, but those are blocked! Knox spins Bourbon around into the corner again…. But before he can mount any offense Bourbon rakes the eyes!!! He grabs Knox as he takes a step up onto the middle rope…. He lifts Knox up onto his shoulder and leaps across the ring!!!

HHL: “Oh! Bobby-Bomb from the top rope!!! Sort-of!! What impact!! OH MY GOD THE RING!!”

The wheels in the back driving the float snap and the back of the ring begins dragging on the ground creating even more sparks!!!! Bobby hops onto his opponent for the cover…..






ONE!!
























TWO!!!!!































THREE!!!!!!!!

WINNER - BOBBY BOURBON