Friday, May 24, 2013 - 11:25 PM EST



I stand in the middle of a graveyard just outside the city limits of Las Vegas. The air warm, dry. As it usually is in the desert. I walk between the head stones until I'm dead center between two 6 foot tall monuments.



SEBASTIAN DUKE: "Mr. Satellite, in under 24 hours, you.... like those rotting away six feet deep in the Earth around me...."



Someone from the camera crew says hello and cuts me off. I look around at my XWF camera crew and notice one man on his cell phone. Naturally, I get a little pissed that this insignificant little piss ant just ruined my promo. He looks at me with the phone still to his ear.



SEBASTIAN DUKE: "Don't mind me. I'll wait."



Sarcasm.


Obviously.


I'm a bit surprised the smallish man would be walking toward me with right now. I mean, we're in a graveyard in the middle of the fucking desert. I could end him right here and no one would ever know.



SEBASTIAN DUKE: "Let's go! Hurry it up!"

CREW MAN: "Actually, Mr. Duke, it's for you."

SEBASTIAN DUKE: "What the hell do you mean it's for me?"



The little crew man hands me his cell phone.



SEBASTIAN DUKE: "Who the hell is it?"

CREW MAN: "It's Wallace Witasick, General Manager of..."

SEBASTIAN DUKE: "I know who the hell he is!"



I take the phone and hit the speaker button.



SEBASTIAN DUKE: "What the fuck do you want, Wallace?"

WALLACE WITASICK: "Is that any way to treat your boss?"

SEBASTIAN DUKE: "Yeah, actually. It is. Seeing as how I have zero respect for you and would love to squash you like I'm going to squash Mr. Satellite tomorrow night."

WALLACE WITASICK: "That remains to be seen."

SEBASTIAN DUKE: "What do you want?"

WALLACE WITASICK: "I just called to let you know you're out of time."

SEBASTIAN DUKE: "Out of time? What the hell are you talking about?"

WALLACE WITASICK: "Your allotted time has expired."

SEBASTIAN DUKE: "Come on, man! I have a promo to shoot here!"

WALLACE WITASICK: "See, therein lies the problem. You are allotted so much time each week to cut your promos. You've run out. In fact, you're over your time by a large margin."

SEBASTIAN DUKE: "Why is this the first I've heard of this? Are you trying to fuck me over?"

WALLACE WITASICK: "Sebastian! I'm offended! Would I do something like that to you?"

SEBASTIAN DUKE: "Yeah, you would actually. I'm going to call Shane and have him override this rule."

WALLACE WITASICK: "Hmmmmmm, yeah I don't think that's going to work, big guy."

SEBASTIAN DUKE: "I'm not following."

WALLACE WITASICK: "Well, this ruling is coming from the Administrator Network and you know as well as I do, no one can override the Network."

SEBASTIAN DUKE: "I know you had something to do with this, you little son of a bitch! Sooner or later I'm going to get my hands on you, and when I do...."

WALLACE WITASICK: "It's in the interest of fairness to the others on the roster, Duke. You've used up so much time poor Franklin Fresh wasn't able to air much at all. It's not fair to the fans, or the other competitors!"



He hung up. I throw the phone against a gravestone and it shatters into dozens of little pieces.



SEBASTIAN DUKE: "I'm going to kill him! I'm going to rip that little bastard to pieces! I'm going to strangle that Mother F.........!"



END TRANSMISSION









Fade to Darkness.