Pest: Already the Pest is bored of this match, and these opponents. He is not tasked with taking out any real competition, only children playing at being men. Children who would starve to death if it weren't for Pizza Delivery, and Grocery Stores. Do we believe Austin Fernando could actually survive in the wilderness? No, the man can barely tell a coherent story in his promotional videos, and even less so make one believable. He parades around as if he was some magical dimension hopping being who rules with a benevolent smile, or is he a child sized murderer? Or, are we supposed to believe he is that innocent and sweet family man who came in and took loss after loss? Or, are we to believe he is the angry angst riddled teenage acting child who followed Gator and Justin Sane like they were his neglectful parents? Perhaps we are to believe this new incarnation of Austin in which he rattles off the same diatribe and slang terms that he heard Luca Arzegotti use, which prompted Mason Prince to start stealing lines from the pair of them under the guise of winning money. It is a terrible chain in the XWF where these lesser talented men attempt to ape the talents of those above them, only to still short. Need proof that Austin is the moutpiece, and the lesser of the men, and I use that term loosely, on his team?

Austin lost to Cyren. Austin could never beat Vincent Lane. Austin was unable to win any sort of title or accolade until he joined forces with, and by forces I mean attempted to ape, Luca Arzegotti. And who did Luca beat? Why, he beat Cyren, he beat Vincent Lane, he has won accolades, all without needing to leach off someone's game. Austin? Well, Austin is lucky to have finally won a title, after countless struggles, and even proclaiming how his team was going to ensure he won the title in the Stampede to avoid losing to Vincent, again. Hey, Austin! Even I have a win over Vincent, hell, Peter has 5 wins. And you? You have none. You, the man so on the defensive about being called a, what was it? Dick Rider? Yes, you are defensive about being called a dick rider. Why is that? Shall we examine that insecurity some? Because, the Pest is not going to call you that. No, the Pest will call you a great many things, but that is not one of them. Bland, recycled, retired trash, that cannot win against people who are not complete jokes, but not a dick rider. No, that insult to to you is about as played out as your own brand of trash talk. Perhaps, like all of your other allegiances, it is high time you ditch this trash talk and find a new brand.

Maybe one that is better suited at not sounding as if you are a puppet with Mister Arzegotti and an angry thirteen year old on 4Chan writing it for you. Continue to use internet buzzwords like fuccboi, and flamethroya, and super hot fiyah, please. It definitely shows us that we are dealing with a child with the intelligence of Peter Gilmour, and the self respect of a rape victim. Oh, you will enjoy the punishment you get, and you will like it. You will like it a lot. Because, at the end of the day, you are nothing more than a Twenty Dollar Whore looking for her next fix of attention. You see, I do not see you as a "nut rider" I see you as a neglected child throwing a tantrum for people to notice you, and then when they notice you, you move on to another group so they will notice you. Until you get noticed, and then move on. This is what you do, you seek validation and attention, which is why with every group you move to, you change your personality to fit them. You are no dick rider, you are just a sad little child in a semi-man's body.

Very little needs to be said on Luca Arzegotti, very little. The man has said all that needs to be said about him, himself. Leaving us wondering if perhaps he realizes the joke of the situation with him being partnered with a failed clone of himself, and all of us left to wonder how serious the situation is? Perhaps that is the reason why Luca behaves as he does, he is in on the jokes we are not. Or, perhaps he simply thinks he is, because he is also a coked out dipshit who thought running around in pajamas and working with Eli to stop Theodore Pryce was a good idea, right before becoming best buddies with Theodore Pryce the second he removed his mask. Wait. That sounds familiar. Was that not the exact situation that happened with John Samuels as well? Why does Theodore make enemies out of people until they remove their mask, then he suddenly wants to suck them off? And why did Luca fight with Azrael Erebus when they were accused of being a power couple? These mysteries will forever be so, because Luca Arzegotti is not gay, he just wants you to call him such so that he has an answer for you. All ready and prewritten, like a politician's speech. Is that not correct, Luca?

Should we focus on Team Special Education? Peter Gilmour, and David Pryce? Because, David Pryce is secretly Theodore's cousin, which is why he intends to be bestest friends with Luca soon. As soon as Luca takes off his mask. Dimallisher, the man who needs an excuse for every lose, but for every win it is because he is simply the best? Yes, Dimallisher and I stepped up and battled each other before. Yes, you did walk out with the win there, I would be a child like Peter, or Vincent Lane to deny it. But, this is different, this time The Pest wasn't told to lose by management. Oh, I know that sounds tacitly like an excuse. Which, I guess one could say it is, save this fact .When The Pest went for the tag titles against Kendall Sawyer, an opponent far superior to either you or Peter, with a far inferior partner than Mark Flynn, and what happened? The Pest won the titles. And what happened to Peter and Dim? When they lost their titles to Azrael and Kendall? Well, they went on to fall into obscurity with Dim winning the Xtreme title and losing it in his first defense. Oh, I know, you were jumped by twelve hundred africans before the match, and you had to be carried in on a stretcher, and fought the best you possibly could with a pipe sticking out of your colon and everything. Because, Dim, you are a fighter. A tough fighter. Right? The toughest of the tough.

This is why you eat your snacks of Peter Gilmour's dirty underpants, and literally carry him everywhere. In matches, on walks. Hell, Pest wonders if you hold his dick for him so that he might pee. The Pest wonders if perhaps the reason you cannot read is because you hold yourself back to make Peter feel like the smartest man in the world. You truly are a good friend, David. Truly.

Now, we have to discuss Peter, the Dick Sucker, Gilmour. You, see Peter, you sucked a dick, you are a dick sucker. It makes sense that you would be booked at event like this, and entirely misunderstand the name. The Pest would not surprised if we find you standing in the ring across from us with your mouth open, and knee pads on, so that you might swallow the fluids of our loins. Do you understand what I mean, or shall I break the words down into smaller words? I mean you want to swallow our jism, Peter. You want hot load in your throat. You are a massive . Peter, allow me to ask you this, why will you be fighting on Friday? Friday is the twenty ninth. The event is slated to take place on the thirtieth, which is a Saturday. You show up early, and hang around the Arena, you like doing that. But, recall, you will be in attendance with a populace who does not support your freshly outed LGBT lifestyle. You will be shaking hands with Vladimir Putin, who is notorious for his anti-LGBT stance, which you have publicly gone and admitted to liking sex with men, and now sucked a dick on national television. You even took it down to the balls like a champion, not even my new toy Jenny can do that. You are a true professional, no wonder David Pryce likes you.

Peter, do you mean to tell me that the Ruler of Xtreme, King of Xtreme, and all of the other silly monikers you have used, is afraid of a little extreme rules? What a pitiful display of manliness on your part. What a terrible Xtreme Icon you are. Hand your title over, I believe my eleven year old son can handle that with more skill. The boy is not afraid, as you are. Please, Peter stop using title reigns from other federations as a means to brag to us about things, because at the end of the day, no one gives a shit what you did in a lesser federation. What we care about now is that you are a weakling, and a coward. The only thing you are not afraid of is the prospect of David Pryce slapping his balls on your chin in the back before the match. Wait. Peter believes that Austin Arzegotti and Luca Fernando are the champions? Oh, what a poor fool. Oh, I apologize, did I mix those names up? That would be because they are essentially the same person, as I have pointed out before. No, Peter, there are no tag champions at this point, Trax vacated them after Azrael vanished again. Do you recall Azrael, Peter? He was the person who kept you from winning the tag titles before. The reason I won them. And the reason I will win them again.

Peter, you ignorant fuck, how do you confuse Luca tazing your opponent as being fair? And how do you see him less than a week ago and question how his body has healed? Not only that, but he beat you in a match less than a year ago, you would have seen his body then. How are you this blind and ignorant? How is Peter really this handicapped? Everyone in the federation knows that you cannot hold two singles titles at the same time. Which is why Doctor D'Ville had to drop his Xtreme title when he took the Universal. Did you see him get pinned for the Xtreme ever? And I thought you held the belt 16 times? That was your claim when I made you question whether I was Zak Rizzo in a James Raven mask, do you recall? You are a sad little liar, or a fool. I have yet to discover truly which one it is. Either way, you should perhaps cease. Let me shed some light on your role in this match, Peter. Lay down on the floor near you, lay down, and let someone lay atop of you for three seconds. That is the only thing you will do. Take a pin. As we have seen time and time again. You are always the one taking the pin when someone can be pinned.

Austin is correct, you should get the Please Retire chants, but not because of your lack of talent, or the fact that you are as intelligent as a 7 year old boy. No, you should retire because with your cholesterol and diabetes, this profession will cost you a foot. Peter, think of your health, and your ability to obsess over and stalk people who are terrible at life. Like Maria Brink, and Rose Smith. Actually, do this. Lose your foot. Lose both of them. This will even the odds when you go off on one of you Simpleton Rage Fits and decide to commit acts of Domestic Abuse, which is rather low. Imagine it, Peter. You are being told that you are a disgusting human being by a noted rapist and murderer. Pleas, Peter, think of these things before your anger gets out of control.

No one is overlooking you, Peter, you have been given the attention that you deserve from the others. No more, and no less. As I stated, you are a non-factor in this match. Until it comes time to make the pin, then you shall truly come in handy. We do need a body to lay across. Now, answer me this riddle, Peter. How does the man who has had things shoved inside of his asshole, and sucked a dick on television, all within the last 45 days, go around calling anyone a and trying to deride Robert or I for these made up fantasies of yours? Or, are they things you have done with David? And Peter, how do you not notice David's less than hidden homosexual displays? Or, do you just ignore them because you think he is your friend? Remember when he won the trios titles with Azrael and Eli? Why did he not bring you in on that adventure if he was your best friend? And why did he allow Soldier to remove you from Lethal Lottery? You are a fool, Peter.

To answer your inquisition, Robert has won a match for a tag title shot since beating you. He is undefeated since then. Whereas you went on to win two matches, and lose one that matters. Yes, I will give you respect for beating Maverick, finally, except Maverick put zero effort into the match, and was beaten within an inch of his life by management before the match. The man fought in a diaper. You beat up a baby who could not control his bowels. And then you pinned Cyren, who put in zero effort, and you still needed Luca to help you win the match. Why would he do that, I question? Oh, because he knew you would be a cake walk in this match. He wanted to make it easy on him to get here. Why would Robert and Austin be lovers? Because they bicker, and argue before a match? You mean, like everyone does? That reinforces the idea that you are a simpleton and a homosexual begging for attention. Peter, you are honestly begging people to notice you at this point. Which is sad, because it tells us all that you are so unimportant that no one notices you unless you wear a neon sign.

I do not matter in this match, you say? And yet you feel the need to mention my name an astounding sixteen times in your promo, while promising to end my career, again. That threat fails to intimidate anyone, ever. Because, Peter, you cannot end careers. You can do nothing to anyone except make them feel bad for crushing an adult with the intelligence of a child. You are a sad fat man, Peter. You are the opposite of Santa Claus, which is sad because soon people will mistake you for him. Peter, please, stop talking as if careers are on the line for everything, because they are not. Ever. Unless specified. You fucking moron. Your brand of trash talk is almost as easily predicted as his, or Vincent Lane's, or Alexis Riot trying to scare people off by being hardcore. You all make the Pest sick.