Blood pours down from your face, the crowd cheers for the sight of the "crimson mask". I always wonder why the sight of blood gets wrestling fans into a orgasmic frenzy. Is it the fact they know they are about to witness as some would say "a pier six brawl" or is it the fact that they know business is indeed about to pick up. Either way you look at it, the normal wrestling fan loves the violence and how violent you can get. On the seventh, everyone will see how violent John Austin can become.....

HELLLOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!

Our view comes into focus as we see John Austin trying to shake the ever loving shit out of the camera. We see Austin standing outside his home in Virginia Beach. The sun is shining down brightly as we can tell from the sweat slowly dripping away like a leaky faucet.

Do I have everyone's attention now? good. Usually you are treated to another episode of Straight Outta Compton but this time, I decided to grace my presence to you all, you lucky motherfuckers you. We are getting close to September seventh. The night of sacrifice is almost here ladies and gentlemen. Now you all know the deal and the run-down of how this night will work so no need for me to bore you.

*clears throat* Hey D. Shadows, put down the blunt for a minute and listen up. I caught your little promo you cut on me a couple days ago after I was done screwing around with the lady friend and I realized something...man you suck! ...You say I am a light-weight? if we are talking about smoking the green, man like Cheech said in Up in Smoke "I was smoking since I was born man" ... "I am not going to last?" see these statements right here prove how much you really do suck ass.

You also have the nerve to say I can't hang with the big boys? ... what the fuck have you done in this company?? ....I have been in the ring with THE Crimson Dong, two times in the same night. If you can handle that space cadet, you can hang with the big boys. Call me when you do something important Shadows.

Now this match may be up your alley D but I look at it as another walk in the park. Another Sunday stroll for me, just whipping another guy's ass who thinks he is better than Mr. Two Two Six Two Four. I carry around one of the twenty four seven briefcases which makes me in-control. This could be a hookah match, a hooker match, or how many STDs can you get from a hooker match...it really does not mean a damn to me. I will still whip your sorry stoner ass all across that ring and advance to round two and the finals.

I keep telling you all from time in and time out that I am one of the best in the world. You hear the cheers at Thunderbowl? the XWF nation has realized no matter what I say or I do, they know I go out there and get the job done every single night. May the spirit of Bob Marley and the smell of whatever I smoke during this match guide me with great strength in whipping your ass.

I will advance to round two and then when I make it to the finals, my name will be forever carved into XWF history as the first ever man to hold a twenty four seven briefcase and be the winner of the deathmatch tournament. So tune in motherfuckers, do not miss out on what will sure to be one hell of a night.

D, keep clouding your judgement before our match. Call up Cheech and Chong and smoke all of the pot you can with them because when you step in the ring with me on the seventh, your first match against me will be the shortest match ever in your career.

Next week, it will be back to another episode of Straight Outta Compton. For now guys and gals, stay safe and remember only dopes.....use dope.

Austin turns around and walks back inside as our scene comes slowly to a close