THEN.

With a splash of cold water to the face, Graves is ripped from his ultimate fantasy and back to the real world, and the real world makes him sad. VV: “FINALLY!! Now come on, we have work to do!!”

NOW!



Coming to you “live” from Parts Unknown thanks to those pesky COVID19 restrictions! Anyway, we find our favorite recovering pedophile Micheal Graves sitting behind a wooden table, wearing an ill-fitting suit OVER his wrestling attire. Seriously, he looks ridiculous with his cape bursting out the back of his suit jacket, and his pant legs missing the mark by around four inches. Yes, Micheal looks pretty goofy right now, but the question on everyone's minds should be, WHY have we gifted with this absurd scene to begin with?



Oh, there it is…

Fortunately, due to promo limit constraints, we’ll spare you whatever this is.

MG: “What? No, you’ll butcher my promo if you cut out the interviews!”

Sorry bro, but it’s either this or that searing smack game!

MG: “Shit, can’t cut the fire!”

EXACTLY! (LOL)

Anyway, yeah, Graves did some interviews and of course they were all weak ass parody attacks like Boris and Natasha, Superman, Miss USA 1979, Mary Therese Friel, you know, because Graves thinks that hot little number Atty is a grandma or something.

MG: “First off, my parodies aren’t weak! Secondly, Atari is so old! SHE WAS BORN IN THE 90s!!!”[dwg]

Let’s just cut to the promo!

(Later)

[dwg]MG: “Awww, Boris is upset that nobody cares about his return… Well, of course, they don’t ya goof, whatever small niche you’ve carved out for yourself here is being outshined by the fact that a true LEGEND has once more graced the Xtreme Wrestling Federation with his presence, and the world knows that now it is just a matter of time before the next GREAT chapter of MY STORY begins! Who could possibly be blamed for not noticing that you even went anywhere, much less made a return in some third rate match that was so obviously designed for me to make my thrilling return to the ring!?! The worlds not talking about you? You’re fucking kidding, right?”

MG: “If you’re really going to moan and whine over not being the star attraction in this match, then all I’ve got to say is…”

Graves pulls an advertisement for the card up for the camera to see.



MG: “GET IN LINE PAL! Cause there are five other people standing in front of you already, and unlike you they all had the sense to realize what their role here is! Two promos Boris? TWO!?! Did you REALLY think that your lame story about getting over a cold was enough to warrant TWO promos? That’s almost as big of a laugh as the thought of any of you no name dipshits winning this thing!”

Yeah, like I said… Fire…

MG: “Goddamn right!”