![]() |
I bet Phil's a nice guy.. - Printable Version +- X-treme Wrestling Federation (https://xwf99.com) +-- Forum: RP Archive (https://xwf99.com/forumdisplay.php?fid=113) +--- Forum: Archives (https://xwf99.com/forumdisplay.php?fid=13) +---- Forum: "Savage Saturday Night" RP Board (https://xwf99.com/forumdisplay.php?fid=16) +---- Thread: I bet Phil's a nice guy.. (/showthread.php?tid=26246) |
I bet Phil's a nice guy.. - Cadryn Tiberius - 01-20-2017 100 Miles per hour. That is literally how fast I am going at the moment. It seems like slight overkill, but for whatever reason, I can't slow down. Maybe it's the anticipation of seeing Graves face when I show up with his favorite actor in my trunk. Or maybe it's the fact that there are roughly 3 cop cars chasing me down this dirt road. Either way, something inside of me is burning, and fueling my desire to continually go faster. Cadryn weaves through the mountains, approaching each turn as if he were in the midst of the NASCAR championship.
I should probably pull over, that would be the intelligent thing to do. Honestly, at this point, I'm unsure if I'm being chased due to my negligence regarding the speed limit, or my slightly abrasive kidnapping technique. Regardless, if I stop now, I will never make it to my destination. The only place I will end up is in the federal penitentiary sharing a tight space with someone named Phil. And when I say tight space, I don't mean the size of our jail cell. On second thought, maybe I should pull over? Phil might be a nice guy.. As Cadryn sits pondering the end game options, the silence is broken by a long, drawn out beeping sound.
Shit, shit, shit. I claim to be so much more intelligent than the rest of the populace. But I imagine most kidnappers would remember to put gas in their get away vehicle before committing such an act. Well, it looks like it's time to lose my entourage and find myself another way back to Graves. I could call AAA, but I imagine they would question the muffled screams and agonizing sounds coming from the trunk of my car. Suddenly Cadryn makes a sharp left turn into what seems to be a dense forest of trees and mountains. As the car screeches to a halt, Cadryn quickly turns the ignition and lights off as to not be seen from the dirt road he had once been traveling. As luck would have it, the 3 cop cars that were following him, speed past in an attempt to catch up with him. Well, that seemed to work for now. This also poses an entirely new issue. Aside from needing a way to get back to Graves, how do I subdue this poor excuse for an action hero that resides in my trunk? Brute Force? Sly talking? I fear that neither of these are the route that I want to take. But what other option could there be? Cadryn perplexed by the situation, steps outside of the vehicle and pulls out his phone. It seems as though his upcoming opponent Jim Caedus decided to cut a couple of last second promos. Cadryn opens the link to the video and begins watching. Minutes pass as Cadryn stares intently into the screen of his phone. A wonderful man known for his smile and sense of humor has seemingly regressed into the man he had once been known.. Wow, Jim. Just wow. I honestly have no words to explain what I was just forced to endure. Cadryn slams his phone down on the hood of the car, and walks back towards the trunk where he has been keeping Bruce Campbell for quite sometime now. Cadryn pounds on the trunk, opting to garner some attention from Bruce. Bruce, I need to talk to you. It's important, can I come in? Cadryn laughs histerically knowing full well Bruce has no control over what Cadryn does or does not do. Ah sweetheart, I'm just joshing. But seriously, I need to talk to you. Open up. Cadryn takes another step back laughing hysterically again before approaching the trunk of the car once more. Cadryn gathers himself and opens the trunk, quickly stepping back and readying himself for a brawl. Oddly enough, once the trunk pops open, there is no movement from inside the trunk. Cadryn approaches the opened trunk slowly and peers inside. Inside lie a motionless Bruce Campbell, blood seemingly pouring from his left ear. It appears as though Cadryn may have done a little too much damage with the dildo-chucks. It seems as though Bruce is out cold. Well, this explains why you weren't kind enough to let me in, old man. I'm going to go ahead and just assume you're dead. You are probably the first man to ever earn the achievement “Death by deadly duel wielded dildos”. Suddenly Bruce jumps out of the trunk like Spider-Man, scaring Cadryn to the point of no return. In typical Cadryn fashion, he screams, Bruce screams, and before you know it Cadryn grabs him by the crotch and punches him in the throat. This sad display of self defense proves to be quite effective, however. Bruce falls to the ground gasping for air. Cadryn quickly grabs him, hurls him back into the trunk, shutting the trunk as fast and as hard as he could. BRUCE, WHY? WHY, BRUCE?! I JUST WANTED TO TALK. I JUST WANTED TO BE FRIENDS, WHY DO YOU DO THIS TO ME? YOU COULD HAVE GIVEN ME A HEARTATTACK. Bruce continues to stay quiet. Either do to the fact that he is 100% scared of Cadryn, or more than likely because he's still recovering from the viscous throat punch he had received. Bruce, I need to ask you something real quick, and I'd like for you to give me your full attention, and an honest answer. Cadryn pauses for a moment to ensure that Bruce understands that the request isn't exactly negotiable. WHY THEY THINK IM GAY, BRUCE? JIM CALLED ME GAY, AND I DON'T THINK THATS OK, BRUCE. I'VE NEVER ONCE SAID ANYTHING ABOUT BEING GAY, WHY HE CALL ME GAY? WHY BRUCE, WHY? Cadryn, obviously upset by Jim Caedus' comments about his sexual preference begins to kick and punch the trunk of the car like a child throwing a temper tantrum. BRUCE ALL HE DID WAS MAKE FUN OF ME, AND QUITE FRANKLY I THINK IT'S BULLSHIT. HE HURT MY FEELINGS, AND I DON'T FUCKING LIKE IT. MY MOM HURT MY FEELINGS ONCE AND YOU CAN ONLY IMAGINE THE PAIN... Cadryn quickly stops himself. The temper tantrum comes to a sudden and dramatic end. It's almost as if Cadryn has a sudden moment of clarity. He smiles, and slumps down against the side of the car. He almost had me there, Bruce. He almost struck a nerve. However, I'm a changed man. Dr. Sayn has helped me become the man my mother always wanted me to be. Granted, again, the same man that helped me, decided it was acceptable to peel half of his face off. But, I'm not one to judge. Anyways, Bruce, listen. I apologize for this whole ordeal. Well, I don't. But in retrospect it could have been handled much more efficiently and professionally. Either way, we're going to get you to Graves, and you're going to solidify a relationship between that man and myself. But back on topic: Jim Caedus First of all, kudos on the most intensely gay dream I've ever come to hear about. You want to talk about me being a “ ![]() Enough time has passed that Cadryn and Bruce can potentially get back on the road and back on task. Clearly, Cadryn is so concerned with getting to Graves he's willing to risk his potential freedom to complete this quest. It looks like it may be a long walk to a gas station from here, but before Cadryn leaves he has a closing sentiment for Bruce. Well, Bruce, it's been a blast hanging out and talking with you. It looks as though our time is drawing to a close. It's time to saddle up, and get back to town. I'm hoping that if I deliver you to Graves as a surprise, he'll reward me with eternal love and friendship. Oh, and one last thing. Jim, you are kind of cute. If you do ever decide to embrace your homosexuality, give me a call. I'd be willing to show you a good time. Of course, I'd need you to leave your alter ego behind. We wouldn't want people to think you were gay.. |