X-treme Wrestling Federation
Zero Promos In 48 Hours - Printable Version

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Zero Promos In 48 Hours - Hero Xtreme 7.9 - 06-06-2015

NOCMM is in a Game Stop laughing at all the misogynerds pre-ordering anti-women games like EA's Star Wars: Battlefront and buying racist games like Witcher III, when he looks at his smartphone and sees that no one has cut a promo yet for Warfare but him. NOCMM shakes his head.

NOCMM: This is why Paul Heyman calls it Welfare, because most the wrestlers are being paid for doing nothing. Can you fucking try for once? That's all I ask. Oaktree may be a gay little , but he works hard to put on this show every week. Maybe you stupid fucks should show him a little respect and cut a fucking promo.

NOCMM rolls his invisible eyes.

NOCMM: I hate Matthew Oaktree more than all you rookies do, but I respect him and the old skool fans enough to do my fucking job. You shitty rookies make me sick.

NOCMM looks at the card for Warfare with an invisible expression of disgust on his invisible face.

NOCMM: Then we have Peter Gilmour and Game Girl. They're not rookies, but they also hate Oaktree and decided they weren't going to try this week. These welfare abusing are supposed to be role models, but here we see Game Girl telling young women everywhere that they don't need to try and they can just get by pretending to like video games. Women succeed by making promos, Game Girl. No one succeeds by being a stupid fat bitch who plays video games all day and hates women.

NOCMM burns a picture of Game Girl, whips out his invisible cock, and pisses WET urine all over the ashes. The guy at the counter starts wondering why it smells like pee and fire, but NOCMM leaves the store before the employee figures out he was cutting a promo in the store.

NOCMM: I wanted to watch a monkey promo and I didn't get one. No one got a monkey promo. Make a better card next time, Oaktree. Maybe everyone else will try too if you do that.