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+--- Thread: You're Not Fat Enough (/showthread.php?tid=19650)
You're Not Fat Enough - Hero Xtreme 7.9 - 04-15-2015
NOCMM enters a barn and starts milking a cow. He squirts some milk into the cup from the cow's tittie. He keeps pulling on the cow titties until the cup is full then he shoots the cow in the head with a shotgun. Later on he'll get somebody to make hamburgers out of the cow's dead body.
NOCMM: God is facing another shitty rookie on Wednesday. This Peter Gilmour guy is so fucking green and lame that he lost to Austin Fernando, a Mexican. The guy lazily crawled around the ring and took naps in the middle of the match and this
couldn't put him away. This guy is a fat fuck, but he doesn't own his fat. He denies its existence like a . Peter, you're an ugly fat fuck and the only way you'll ever change for the better is if you can accept that. If you stay in denial God will never make you a main eventer.NOCMM drinks some of the dead cow's milk.
NOCMM: I heard you're a Christian man like me, Peter. I heard you worship God and Satan. I heard you like the Bible. Then you must accept Hero Xtreme 7.9 as God. Hell isn't a place for good Christian rookies, so you need to shape up. Bulk up a bit you fat ass.
NOCMM leaves the barn and enters the chicken coop.
NOCMM: Have you ever been near a chicken before, Peter? Have you ever been close enough to pluck its feathers? Have you ever put Parmesan on it and eaten one live?
NOCMM sprinkles some Parmesan on a chicken and takes a bite out of it.
NOCMM: I have.
Feathers fall out of his mouth as he says that. He chews and swallows the chicken flesh.
NOCMM: IT TASTES LIKE CHICKEN!
NOCMM swallows the rest of the chicken in one gulp as the scene fades to an Xtreme shade of black.