X-treme Wrestling Federation
Cards with Calypso! - Printable Version

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Cards with Calypso! - Vincent Lane - 11-12-2014

(("Loverboy" Vinnie Lane spots Calypso as he's getting set in the Liverpool arena. Waving him over, he plops down at a small table and produces a deck of cards, shuffling like a pro and nodding toward a chair.))

Take a load off, dude! You like to play stud or hold 'em?


re:Cards with Calypso! - The Blue Tango - 11-12-2014

Calypso tips his fedora forward and scratches his neck beard.

"OH! No you didn't!!"

He pulls up a chair and sits down.

"Well, even though I'm a STUD, myself... I'd prefer...."

Calypso pulls his finger guns from the holsters and points them at Vinnie Lane.

"Stick 'em up!! Ha! Ha! I'm so smooth."

He places his guns back in their holsters.


re:Cards with Calypso! - Vincent Lane - 11-12-2014

Careful with those things, dude! They could go off at any time!

Say, does anyone around here have a drink?


((Loverboy deals the cards, laying three hearts down on the flop. A three, a six, and a seven.))


re:Cards with Calypso! - The Blue Tango - 11-12-2014

"As a matter of fact!!!"

Calypso reaches down under the table and pulls out a six-pack of Twisted Tea Original.. Pulls a cap off of two and slides one across the table. It was off-balance enough to tip over and spill all over the deck of cards and Vinnie Lane's lap.

"OH DUDE!!! I'M SO SORRY!!!"

Calypso picks up a handful of cards and starts fanning them off sending a million little drops of Twisted Tea airborne all over.


re:Cards with Calypso! - Vincent Lane - 11-12-2014

You dumbass! I had a flush! And now there's shitty alcohol all over my Def Leppard shirt!

Okay dude, I have no choice here... watch out for a stampede of ovulating bitches to show up...


((Loverboy pulls the shirt off over his head, leaving him stopless in the chair.))

You got more cards?


re:Cards with Calypso! - The Blue Tango - 11-12-2014

"Nice pecs, dude!"

"I don't have anymore cards, but I have this..."


Calypso pulls a game of 'Connect-4' out from under the table.

"You down mo-fo?!"


re:Cards with Calypso! - Vincent Lane - 11-12-2014

Jesus...

((Loverboy plunks down a red checker into the first slot, then produces a boombox from seemingly out of thin air. He presses a button and Queensryche's "Operation Mindcrime" starts to play.))

Hope you don't mind some sweet tunes dude... I like to rock out while I kick ass!

Your turn by the way... hey, how about we make this interesting?



re:Cards with Calypso! - The Blue Tango - 11-12-2014

Calypso begins stomping his foot and attempting to sing along with the song, which he actually has no clue of the lyrics.

He takes a black checker and throws it down into one of the slots.

"You mean... a wager?"


re:Cards with Calypso! - Vincent Lane - 11-12-2014

((Loverboy snickers and shakes his head, blown away by the sheer of his new friend.))

Yeah man, a "wager."

How 'bout this... since you don't have any money, if you win this game, I'll give you... hm... 10,000?

And if you lose, or somehow screw the game up again.... you have to go challenge Ghost Tank to a fight. Probably one of his crazy meathook fights or something.

Deal?


((Loverboy plops another red checker in, creating a connection with the first.))


re:Cards with Calypso! - The Blue Tango - 11-12-2014

Calypso's eyes widen...

"GHOST TANK?!?!"

His face turns the same shade of red as the checkers that Vinnie Lane is playing with.

"Well......... Ten grand is a lot of money... Hm.. And I am a champion 'Connect-4' player... Hmmmmmmmmmm....."

Calypso smiles a sly smile back to Vinnie Lane. He picks up a black checker and drops it in a slot cancelling out one side of Vinnie's connection.

"Hah heh... You've got yourself a deal, Party-Boy."

Calypso reaches under the table and pulls another bottle of Twisted Tea from the six-pack.

"Could I offer you another tea?"


re:Cards with Calypso! - Vincent Lane - 11-12-2014

((Loverboy's third checker drops on top of Calypso's most recent, creating a multi-directional possibility.))

Yeah man, no sense in wasting shitty drinks, right? Pass that bad boy on over!


re:Cards with Calypso! - Chair of Mastermind - 11-12-2014

(11-12-2014, 09:40 AM)LoverboyVinnieLane Said: (("Loverboy" Vinnie Lane spots Calypso as he's getting set in the Liverpool arena. Waving him over, he plops down at a small table and produces a deck of cards, shuffling like a pro and nodding toward a chair.))

Take a load off, dude! You like to play stud or hold 'em?

*The 'chair' beneath Calypso begins bouncing up and down.*

HEY! Skinny bitch with the neard! Get the fuck off of me! I didn't agree to having your ass on me. What kind of person do you take me for?



re:Cards with Calypso! - The Blue Tango - 11-12-2014

"What the blazes?!"

As Calypso hands Vinnie Lane another bottle of Twisted Tea the chair below him begins talking and bouncing up and down! Calypso freaks out and jumps off it dropping another bottle on the table! It shatters and Twisted Tea and red and black checkers go flying everywhere! The game is ruined..... AGAIN!!

"NOOOOO!!!!!!!!!"


Cards with Calypso! - Chair of Mastermind - 11-12-2014

*Chair backs up and rolls forward hitting Calypso and sending him over the table! He lands on the table and his hands land perfectly on Lane's chiseled pecs*


re:Cards with Calypso! - Vincent Lane - 11-12-2014

((Loverboy stands up and whips his gorgeous blond hair back and forth in slow motion, sending droplets of tea all around him.))

Tough break dude... looks like you lose the bet!


re:Cards with Calypso! - The Blue Tango - 11-12-2014

Calypso cups his face in his hands and groans.

"Awwwwwe maaaaan... I can't believe this! Do I seriously have to challenge Ghost Tank?! GHOST TANK?!?! I'll get killed bruh!! Come on!! I'll give you the rest of my Twisted Teas!! How about that?!?! They're yours!!

He picks up the three remaining bottles left in the six-pack and holds them out to Vinnie Lane.


re:Cards with Calypso! - Vincent Lane - 11-12-2014

((Loverboy waves his hands in front of him, denying the awful drinks.))

A bet's a bet, dude! We had a deal!

Besides, Mastermind beat Tank so you probably can too! Get in that challenge room and DO IT! Or I'll have to do it for you...


((Loverboy then mimics Calypso's mysterious hand gestures.))

...CALYPSOOO!


re:Cards with Calypso! - The Blue Tango - 11-12-2014

Calypso walks away with his head hung low.

"GOODBYE CRUEL WORLD!!"

"I had so much to live for too...."



Cards with Calypso! - Frodo mother fucking Smackins - 11-12-2014

Frodo comes running towards them, naked and fully engorged, holding a broken mop handle.

"Labe, cover up your nasty shemale tits. I'm here for Calypso. He never paid for my phone! Who wants popsicled?"


re:Cards with Calypso! - Vincent Lane - 11-12-2014

That's cool, man, I was just leaving anyway...

((Loverboy gives it a second though, then grabs the Twisted Teas from Calypso anyway before leaving him alone in the hallway with the ubiquitous hobbit.))


re:Cards with Calypso! - The Blue Tango - 11-12-2014

Calypso shrieks at the sight of a naked Frodo carrying a broken mop handle.

"I said I was sorry! I was going to pay for it! But I lost the bet!! I'm sorry!! I'm sorry!!!! I'M SOORRRRY!!!!!!!!"

Calypso trips over the Chair of Mastermind, regains his footing, and runs away in the opposite direction screaming aloud over and over again that he's 'sorry'.