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+---- Thread: Arryn Connolly can fuck off. (/showthread.php?tid=12477)
Arryn Connolly can fuck off. - Frodo mother fucking Smackins - 05-26-2014
Frodo is seated in his dressing room backstage getting ready for his match with Mandii. By getting ready we mean smoking an obscene amount of Avalanche and listening to some All Caps. This pumps the man up, don't judge or hate. Just be jealous that you're not him, you'll never be him. He is the King of The Dwarves, the Sultan of Short People, Master of Midgets, Lord of the Lumberjacks. You get the idea, fuckers. Kristina Horner calls Frodo up when she gets bored, not for sexing, for some awesome Fangirl/Fanboy talking. Yeah, suck on that McFly. You had your shot,
. Goddamn, I hate McFly, cheap Busted knock off!"Arryn Connoly. Hi, we haven't met yet. My name is Frodo Smackins, and I'm sitting here in Texas. I'm not a Southern man by any means, no I'm a proud Michigander, and I love my state. I'm just here waiting for my match against Mandii Rider. Have you done research on this place, Arryn? Mandii Rider is one of the toughest bitches in the fed, she's been pretty unbeatable lately. Except, I'm going to stop that reign. I will end Mandii Rider's streak of Victory. That's just the start of things, when I get done beating her, I'm going to kick your ass in the ring. You may have beat Sterling Steal, but that's not something I'd brag about. Call me when you're more than a show opener, kid.
I guess you are this week at RTX, but that's only because you're stepping into the ring with a giant, literally, and me. Do you know who the fuck I am? Have you figured that out, yet? I'm Frodo Goddamn Mother Fucking Smackins. I'm the mother fucker who literally fucks mothers and just doesn't give a shit about how things work. I'm the kind of fucker who would rape a goat, or a dog, or a llama, just to prove you don't want any of me. Fact, before I stepped into the ring here for the first time I made myself known by raping, yes rape, Peter F'n Gilmour. He was the XTreme Champ at the time, and I raped his ass like he was a teenage girl who got roofied at a Frat Party. Thing about that.
What else have I done of note? Look at Tommy Gunn, one of the baddest mother fuckers to join this fed in a while, much more so than you. Look how hard he had to work to put me down, or Sebastian Duke. I'm not always a winner, I will not lie and claim I am, but I am not someone you can step over and win. Ask Nathaniel Idenhaus. Or let's talk about Morbid Angel, and how much of a best he is, in his own right. He took my Ark title from me, but I'll take his Xtreme title from him, and do you know how I can be assured of this? Because we faced off once before. It was when we were both new here. It was my third match here. Fresh off of victory over Dimillisher and Hank Lane, I faced Morbid for a #1 Contender's shot for the European Title.
Guess what happened? I lost the match, so did Morbid, but I pinned the beast. And had him on the ropes knocking some teeth loose. That doesn't impress you? He's been in this business longer than I have, and I did that. I'm a computer nerd from the suburbs of Detroit. I am not a fighter, I started wrestling 2 years ago. Mostly the Indie-Circuit, I'm a new jack. Not only that, but I am high as giraffe pussy most of the time. If I could do that to a man over a foot taller than I am, and almost 3 times my weight, imagine what I'll do to you, little girl. Yes, little, like I didn't catch that you're shorter than I am, and weigh 40 pounds less. You've got no chance against me, and I think it's time we stop pretending you do. I'm going to break you, then if you're lucky I'll call you in the morning for some fun. I'm not Brodie Tyler, I'm not in love with you, and I won't pretend to be. I'm not even sure if I find you attractive or not, but I always could use some sweet sexing. See ya soon, sugar tits."
Frodo stood up, he looks confused as to where he's at. Yeah, that shit was strong, but will it be strong enough to get his mind off what Mandii does to his heart. Oh well, time to get pumped.
He starts to do the dance Luke does in the video for World of Warcraft ruined my life. Just then Kristina calls him.
"Hey, Fred. What's up? Harry Potter Marathon tomorrow?"
"Does John Green want me to be awesome?"
"No. Everyone but you. You know that. Fred, you know you're banned from his house. Come on, you got into a fight with his brother. Hank just thought Hunger Games was better than Twilight, and you busted his eye. Damn. Also, remember what you did to Luke because he called you little guy? He's still skiddish when he sees people shorter than him."
"I thought he forgave me. He sent Joseph-Gordon a card, and called him when I had my accident. Damn. Fine, yeah I want the HP Marathon, I'll bring my daughter."
"Sweet. See ya there."
She hung up.