X-treme Wrestling Federation
Strip clubs and Trans Ams (2) - Printable Version

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Strip clubs and Trans Ams (2) - SwagMire - 03-11-2014

After the strain of organizing that cluster bomb of homeless joy that was his last promo, Swagz decided it was time to chill out. Chilling out, and prepping for battle? There's only one nigga who he'd wanna chill with before a fight like this. Michael Fucking Radio. First, Swagenstein promised to take his nephew out for some fun, so he had to go and pick him up, and luckily they'd be using the car that Freddie had bought Joseph-Gordon, it was pretty fucking awesome. It was a 1973 Pontiac Firebird Trans-Am with a 455 HO under the hood. Too much car for a 15 year old. Carlton started to drive over to pick up Joeseph and the car, first he should call Radio.


"Hey, Radio. It's me, Swagz. I know we don't get along, but I've got an idea, and I want you to listen up. I was thinking we should go and chill out at a strip club I know of. It'll be fun. We can bond before the match. Come on."


"You want me to go to a strip club and get ice cream with you? You don't think that's a little odd? I don't like you."

"I'm not asking for us to be best friends, I just think we need to work on team bonding. And a strip club and ice cream is the ultimate bonding for two bros about to have each other's backs in battle. Sort of. I mean, we won't be in the ring together, but when you beat that bitch Lucena you'll be keeping Scorp and me from getting gang raped by Eli's redneck goons. You and I both know if his goons win it's no good for either of us. Come on, buddy. We'll bring Joseph-Gordon."

"Fine, pick me up. You know where to find me."

Zilla drove over to where Joseph-Gordon and Gwen live over to grab his nephew and the car. Gwen was still a wreck from Freddie, but she still maintained her over all dislike of Swagmire. So much so that she barely spoke to him.

"Joseph, your pile of shit uncle is here. You know, the one who let your father die. He's supposed to take you out for some ice cream, and probably have you murdered. Be sure to call me if tries to have you killed or something.

"Mom, it'll be fine. Uncle Swag didn't let dad die, and he won't have me killed. We're gonna go for ice cream and lunch. We're gonna take the Trans Am. Bye."

Swag and Joseph swapped cars, and started the engine right up. Thing purred like a beast with 320 HP under hood. After letting the engine warm up Swag and Joseph drove off to meet up with Radio. Once they were clear of Gwen, Joseph pulled a cigarette out of his jacket and lit it up.

"What the hell are you doing? You're too young to smoke, man. Put that shit out."

Swagmire pulled the cigarette from Joseph's mouth before tossing it out the window.

"Listen, before we go to lunch we're picking up a dude I know. He's cool, I work with him, and your dad worked with him, too. He's kinda weird, but be cool. Then we're gonna hit up a strip club, they have a buffet there. Still got that fake ID I got you?"

Joseph Gordon pulled his wallet out and showed Swag the fake ID, it said he was 24, and named Joseph Sweet. It looked pretty legit, the wonders of your uncle being a former detective and friends with the undercover division.

"We're going to a strip club? Awesome, and who's this guy we're picking up? Is it that Dean McGovern guy? Dude creeps me out, he's a serious pedophile."

"Yes, yes he is. And no, we're meeting Mr. Radio. I know I just had a match with him, but he's cool people. Remember when we roll up to the club you need to act like an adult, not a high school kid. Hold up, that's Radio, but something's not right."


As the duo pulled up they saw Radio was busy fighting 6 dudes at once. Swagmire jumped out of the car and ran over to try and help. By the time he got to Radio, Radio had hit one guy with a Galaxy DDT so hard the man's next snapped, then another with the same results. Radio hit a superkick so hard the man hit a wall and lost control of his bowels. Holy Shit! Who knew that could actually happen. One man came up on Radio from behind, but using some awesome badass ninja technique Radio ended up getting the guy in a Diamond Cutter. What the fuck! One of the last two ran off screaming. The final one pulled a pistol from his back pocket.

BAM! Swagmire shot the punk in the chest.

"Get in the car, now. Come on Radio, we've got to get the fuck out of here. I just shot someone using an old cop gun I took from the police. Joseph, get in the back. Hurry."[/b]


"Fine. Who's the kid anyway? Is he yours, nig...Swaggins?"

"I'm Joseph Gordon, I'm Frodo's son. Aren't you dating Zak's sister, Micah? I liked Zak.


"Was. Moved on. Why are we bringing a kid with us today?


"Bonding time with the uncle. Come on, we''re here. And if anyone asks, he's 24.


The trio made their way into the club where the girl on stage instantly caught Radio's eye. She looked like she was trying to be cute but instead looked fundamentally . She looked like the kind of girl Scorpio would like, easy and not much else going on.

[Image: arianagrande9.gif]

When her dance was up, Swagmire went up and paid for her to give a "private lapdance" to Radio in the back. As she pulled him to the back Radio mouthed a silent thank you to Swagmire. The two remaining found a seat by the stage and sat and enjoyed the stage as a new dancer hit it.

[Image: tumblr_lsri9lVJrg1qf7p7i.gif]



Her music got Swaggy dancing along. She wasn't ugly, a little young for Swagmire's tastes, but Joseph was certainly into her. So, while she was dancing Swagmire slipped a stack of hundreds into Joseph's pocket. He nudged his nephew and gestured to make it rain. Joseph obliged and she began to dance more in his direction. When her dance was done she came down, grabbed Joseph and pulled him to the back.

With both members of his team gone with the "ladies" Swagmire just sat back and enjoyed the show.

An hour or so later


Radio came back and sat beside Swagmire, neither men spoke. Swags didn't want to know what happened, and Radio didn't say. After a few minutes Joseph Gordon decided to join the group. Along with his dancer friend.

"Hey guys, this is Jeanie. She's off in about 30 minutes, I'm gonna chill with her then we're gonna go out to get some food elsewhere."

"Fine, but be safe. Call me if you need anything, and I'm taking the Trans Am. Sucks to be you. Radio, let's go get some food, or do you want Ice Cream instead?


"I want both. And I know where we're going. Wendy's. Come on. Your treat."

To be continued.