09-25-2013, 10:15 AM
The Narrator
It's wake up time, isn't it? Look up in the sky sometime and try to find an albatross bird. Have you ever seen this creature before? Maybe you have, and maybe you haven't. If for some reason you haven't, then they are quite the interesting bird. In fact, pause for a moment and go google.. or yahoo.. or bing these fascinating birds. No, wait. How about you just go to this place called youtube and watch some videos on these birds. Hey, you know what? I'll be the nice guy and provide you the direct place to go:
See? I'm not so bad now, am I? One of the interesting things that sticks out is how this bird sleeps. The albatrosses unfortunately can't afford to take a nap on a water bed. If the bird were to fall asleep at sea, it would be an easy target for all kinds of underwater predators. To escape that danger and get some dream time, albatrosses take flight. That's right! This bird is one of the few winged creatures that is able to fly and sleep at the same time. So when you wake up, remember to be thankful that you're in a room on a bed. Unless you're homeless, but let's be honest for a moment, hearing this voice you're probably not. So I think we're covered.
The albatrosses may think they are free in the air because the creatures that would have them for breakfast, lunch, or dinner are not present there. A problem is still there, though. Hunters with guns. Or a meteor falling from the sky and hits them, which may sound far fetch but who knows. It may seem a bit of the old imagination, but we can't see the future or predict what's going to happen unless of course you're 'one of those'. Let's be honest, if you're one of those then why bother listening to anything. Regardless, the albatrosses are never really safe from a moments rest.
Young Tyler is similar to the albatross. He always tries to find somewhere safe to rest and have fun, but is he really ever safe? Are we ever really protected for a moment of rest or is that just a fun illusion that keeps us snuggled underneath our blankets? Tyler likes to be alone and doesn't like to be alone. He's a very strange person who doesn't fit in with the others. The future could be bright for him, or it could just be lights out.
Waldo is sitting in a Carl's JR fast food joint. He's eating a double cheeseburger and large fries, but drinking a diet coke to watch his figure.
The Narrator
Tyler is watching his weight, not really his figure per-say. He's not a body builder, he's a professional athlete now.. a wrestler.
Waldo stops chewing for a moment and looks around like he heard someone call his name. He goes back to chewing his moment and is reading a book titled Every Day a Friday by Joel Osteen. He nods at a few sentences that he comes across and begins to underline them with his pen. He shakes his head like he can't believe what he just read at the next few paragraphs with a smile on his face. This smile..
The Narrator
The smile that never leaves. Even in trouble, he would bring out that smile as if he were a young child about to journey through the place known as Disney World. The real Disney, located in Florida, not the fake one known as Disney Land in California.
Waldo stops chewing again and closes the book in frustration. He picks up his brand new iPhone 5s and unlocks the screen. His background wallpaper is his former crush, Jessie-ca Diaz. He decides it's time to move on and let her go. He begins to browse through various wallpapers to get a replacement, but as he does he gets a text message from the XWF Office informing him they are putting him in a match on Monday Madness against Michael McBride. Waldo starts to get excited and completely forgets to change his wallpaper from Jessie-ca Diaz.
Carl's JR's is beginning to get busy. Waldo picks up his phone, goes inside the men's bathroom and locks the door behind him. He starts to jump up and down, and get loose like he's about to run a marathon. He gets out his phone and goes to his video recording app and records.
"So, the return of Waldo has come back to.. no. That's not it. Crap. How did he do it!? Waldo is returning, FI-NA-LY to Madness. Shit. That's not it either. I know it! Think Waldo! The returning Waldo is retur.. DAMN IT! What the hell is that stupid opening line of his! Finally, Waldo has come back to Madness. Yes! Jackpot! Got it.
Clears throat.
"Finally, the Waldo has come BACK to Madness.
Waldo begins to make his own crowd sounds.
"So, I'm in a match with a jabroni named.. named.. hold on.
Waldo looks at his phone to see who his opponent is, then goes back to the recording.
"A jabroni named Michael McBride. More like Michael McNUGGET! I'm not talking about the fifty piece, the thirty piece, the twenty piece, no sir! I'm talking about you are the McNugget no one wants to buy. You've been sitting out too long and plus you're not healthy! Now, if you were made from turkey it may be a little better for you. That's what I had a lunch today. A double turkey burger.
You are unhealthy for this company, McNugget. I'm just the man to health you out of here.
What the fuck did I just say?
Anyways, Mr. McNugget, you are stepping in the ring with me. The great and powerful Waldo. Your unhealthy brick road has led you straight to the wizard who is going to send you back to Kansas. Your ass is grass, and I'm going to turn it into something healthy! I can't say smoke it, because I don't do that. At least not anymore.
The bathroom door is being unlocked, apparently by a manager or employee of Carl's JR. Waldo quickly gets inside a stall and shuts the door. People are walking in and using the bathroom. He lowers his voice but still can be heard by everyone who walks in.
"I'm here to make a statement. John Madison wouldn't accept my challenge, so I'm put in a match against you. I'm sorry, but you're going to lose.
Waldo stops talking as he hears guys laughing at him. He presses the upload and send button. He isn't too upset since he thought it went fairly well, but then goes to play it back and sees he forgot to hit the 'flip the camera' button so it recorded the wall instead of him.