08-17-2013, 08:23 AM
What the commoners are saying:
"This is a quick update. I'm going to come down to Mega Madness and watch King Madison retain his crown but I'm not going to hesitate to give Peter Gilmour a cheeky little punch to the face if he some how manages to flop out the ring." - Jason E Smith talking about what Peter Gilmour does best: flop.
The shaky cameraman brings us into focus as he and his assistant follow The Black Circle through the backstage area of the Wells Fargo Arena. Midnight was approaching and all three members were eager to leave. We pass by several members of the cleanup crew on our way to the parking garage.
"Just take it easy," Shane tells Luca who is using the wall to keep himself steady as he walks. "We don't need you falling down again."
"Luca, get yourself together!" John Madison says to Luca, trying to encourage him. "So what if Peter handcuffed you to his bike? You're still capable of beating his ass in the ring, even with all those injuries that you sustained. Quit being a pussy and walk normal before you get fat like Peter Gilmour!"
Luca has no response to John Madison's comments. He just continues on down the path of John and Shane
's footsteps."If you puke one more time, I'm gonna rub your face in it."
"We might have to carry him, John. He doesn't look well. I knew we should have sent him to the hospital."
"Quit being so fuckin' dramatic, Shane. Luca is fine. I'm pretty sure he could go run a marathon if he needed to right now."
"If you say so, my king..."
"Of course I say so. Now shut up while I talk more shit about my opponents. Luca, you pay close attention because even though you won't be allowed to interfere on my behalf, you will still play an integral role on Mega Madness.
I wish that role could be as simple as you interfering, and then everyone else gets involved and starts beating the fuck out of each other. I think that would be a lot of fun.
But unfortunately, that won't happen-- not unless I decide to forfeit this crown on my head. Unlike Paul Heyman, I'm not willing to sit back and watch the crown be forfeited to a lazy bum or to the guy who signed up last week. Shit, knowing Peter Gilmour, he probably would be okay with me forfeiting it since he refuses to work for anything in life. Peter Gilmour loves handouts, I'm sure he wouldn't pass up on the opportunity.
The sad thing is, even if I did forfeit the crown, I'm pretty sure LJ Havok would walk out as the king. Peter Gilmour's pathetic track record against rookies speaks for itself. This crown going into Peter's hands is beyond disgraceful; it's just flat out silly. He would lose it immediately to one of the random ass rookies we signed last week. King Joseph Kain, anybody? King Guy Toadie? Scary thought, isn't it?
Of course, Peter Gilmour doesn't have a chance of walking out the king just like he didn't have a chance of walking out of Brooklyn as the number one contender. He couldn't even win a gauntlet match where he was the last entrant. I must ask, as a veteran of the sport, how on earth do you fuck that up?
But I'm a generous king and I was willing to give Peter Gilmour a FREE title shot anyway. Like I said, people like to chalk me up as the villain, but it's not like that.
You don't believe me, Pete? Allow me to play for you some relevant footage on my cell phone."
Quote:Paul Heyman: I've been conversing with him via text message for a good portion of my day and even he agrees that in the interest of fairness, and admittedly, by his own request, there needs to be a change to the King defense in Cleveland.
"Look at that shit, Peter. Put down the chicken Parmsan Hot Pocket, get off of your fat ass, and look closely at what Paul Heymans said. Pretty scary that the best decision to come out of Paul's mouth was a decision made by me, isn't it? And yet, I'm the bad guy and Paul is the good guy, right? I'm the bad guy because I told you to bring all your friends into the match so we could really take things to the 'xtreme.' I'm the bad guy because I chose to include you in the match even though you don't deserve. And I'm the bad guy because I keep you informed on how overweight and disgusting you are.
I put you in the match for one reason, Peter.
I put you in the match to prove that I control your destiny.
Paul Heyman doesn't control your destiny.
___♛
JOHN MADISON controls your destiny.
It's not such a bad deal, Peter. You should be grateful that I've gone out of my way in order to make you somewhat relevant. Just think Peter, if me and LJ Havok get into a car wreck and die, you might actually become king!
Anyway, I inserted your fat ass into that match because I could. I did it because, honestly, I'm not all that interested in just a one-on-one match with LJ FuckFace. I also figured that along with Peter Gilmour, I get the Feders, Unknown Soldier, and The Brotherhood, so why not? Why not insert Peter Gilmour into the match so I can have a little bit of extra fun? I did more for your career in one move than you or anyone else has ever done, Peter. When was the last time someone gave you a free title shot? Has anyone ever grabbed you by your oversized neck and thrown you to the top of the ladder like I have?
Peter, while I'm helping boost your career, Paul Heyman is just watching you fall. Think about it, Pete. First, go watch what Paul Heyman did at the Rumble in Brooklyn when you were supposedly 'screwed.' Then, after you watch that, go watch the main event from Madness that took place on July 22nd. That will tell you how highly Paul Heyman thinks of you. On July 22nd, he walked out and reversed the decision that had Luca Arezgotti and Marvin The Emo Martian winning. He did all of that for his buddies Nightmare and Sid Feder. So why didn't he do that for you when you were 'screwed' in the Rumble in Brooklyn, Pete? I'll tell you why-- because he doesn't give a damn about you or your excuses.
You know who else doesn't give a shit? The Feders and The Brotherhood. Oh, The Brotherhood lets you ride around on a motorcycle now? Is that their way of making up for when they showed that embarrassing footage of you overindulging on chicken Parmesan? Some friends you have there, Peter. They won't even give you and that curly haired fuck, Sid Feder, a shot at the Tag Titles. How dare they! Aren't Sid Feder and Peter Gilmour the greatest Tag Team Champions to ever live? And like I said before, why is The Brotherhood fucking around when they could be helping you train for your match since you obviously lack the ability to train yourself?
Furthermore, don't you find it just a tad bit peculiar that Luca Arzegotti attacked you in a The Messenger ring attire? How do you think Luca got a hold of that particular attire in the first place? Luca might be a strong, gifted athlete, but is he capable of beating down the entire Brotherhood and stealing The Messenger's bath robe getup, all on his own? We don't even have the capability of tracking where The Messenger is lurking or what he is exactly. Are you gonna sit there and tell me that Luca Arzegotti is suddenly an expert on all things The Messenger? And don't you dare question the authenticity of the The Messenger robe that Luca was wearing; everyone saw that the robe was the real deal. If you question whether or not that robe was authentic then you might as well question whether your membership in The Brotherhood is authentic. I haven't even touched on the Asmodeus cane part of this story. I hate to break it to you, Pete, but that Asmodeus cane belongs to your fearless, cape wearing leader. Yes, Luca did own an Asmodeus cane during Duke's stay with The Black Circle, but Luca also had his name carved into the stainless steel handle of it. Just ask him! Now, this is the part where shit gets serious so don't freak out on me. Peter, I examined that handle grip of the Asmodeus cane in question, and Luca's name was nowhere to be found. That cane wasn't Luca's, buddy. In fact, I am 100 percent certain that it was the original Asmodeus cane that Sebastian Duke carries with him to ringside. Trust me, I've known Duke longer than you have. I know an original Asmodeus cane when I see one. I studied Asmodeus canes for years; I know the ins and outs.
You know what I think, Peter? I think that Sebastian Duke put his differences with The Black Circle aside for one night and collaborated with Luca and Juan Madison to screw you. Think about it, why would Duke let anyone in The Brotherhood but himself face the king? If Duke let that slide, then that would imply that he isn't the leader of the group and you are, Peter. I'm telling you, Sebastian Duke is stabbing you in the back and you don't even realize it. I was drunk that entire week so I have no recollection of what meetings took place. However, I did notice in one of the guest rooms of The Black Circle's sprawling mansion, that one of the pillows was stained with what looked to be eyeliner residue. Hmm, let's see...
1) Duke is the only one in the XWF who wears eyeliner.
2) Duke has been crying in bed for weeks about some shitty dreams he's been having.
Also, I noticed some tread marks in the driveway that had to belong to someone's shitty truck. So I'm pretty Duke was around last week. He's lucky that Luca hid him so well or I might have strangled him in his sleep.
So now that I've presented to you all of the evidence, what do you think of your Brotherhood now, Peter? Would I lie to you, Peter? I've been nothing but kind to you the whole time so why would I lie? Not only that, but I took twelve credit hours of Criminal Justice back in community college, just for the record. I know this stuff like the back of my hand. Anyway, it's all pretty fucked up if you ask me. It's one of those things which I think can only end in you handcuffing Sebastian Duke to the back of your motorcycle and dragging his big ass down the steps of the Quicken Loans Arena.
You won't though, Peter. Instead, you'll just wait for The Brotherhood to stab you in the back again and leave you behind when they're finished with you. I bet Duke is dying to stab someone in the back ever since I fucked him over at High Stakes. Why not do it to someone weak like you, Peter Gilmour?
As long as you kneeled down and declared me as your king, I wouldn't do that to you Pete-- NEVER.
I might be an aggressive, outspoken king, but I am not a cruel one. After all, it was my aggressiveness and outspokenness which got you this match in the first place, Peter. If anyone in the XWF should vouch for me possessing these traits, it's you.
Still, I would have to say that generosity is my greatest trait. I'm a generous man because when I see someone like Peter Gilmour who calls me out again and again, I give Peter a chance. Of course, no one expects Peter to make the most out of the opportunity that he's been given, but that's not the point. The point is I'm willing to defend this crown against all challengers, which brings me to my next subject.
I often hear the term, "paper crown" being thrown around. Peter Gilmour, Mister Mystery and Sid Feder are the ones who usually refer to my crown as such. That's funny because I'm pretty sure that I've defended my crown more times than they've defended their Trio Titles. Ah, but Peter's excuse is that, 'there are no worthy challengers!' Well, Peter, if that's the case for you then couldn't I use the same excuse for myself? I could, but I don't. The fact of the matter is, no one has bothered to challenge me. And those of you who do challenge (which is just Peter Gilmour...) haven't gone through the process of earning the opportunity.
If anyone's championship were to be described as 'paper,' it would be your Trio Championship, Pete. Sorry, but that's just the truth. The fact of the matter is, you haven't taken on all challengers. I recall two weeks ago when members of The Connection challenge you, Soldier, and Mystery to a Trio Titles match. A match which was sure to be monumental. What came of that, Peter? As I recall, Unknown Soldier basically took the coward's way out by throwing out the most absurd stipulation that he could formulate in that deranged mind of his. Peter, you seem to be all against people getting 'screwed,' so wouldn't you say that a couple of hungry challengers being fed a bullshit stipulation is kind of screwy? I mean, these guys wanted this match purely for competitive reasons and yet you and your boys were cornering them into a match style that they wanted no part of. Since you associate with Poppa Feder and Unknown Soldier, I can only assume that you support their decisions, otherwise you would drop that Trio Title and want no part of it.
What was the match that your teammates wanted, Pete? Something along the lines of blood, semen, and feces? Hmmm. So then, you believe that in order for someone to be deemed worthy of a title shot, they must endure being covered in semen and poop. That's interesting, Peter. It's very interesting seeing as how you come out on camera every week and try to convince everyone that I am a homosexual. Yet, you're the one who wants to roll around in semen and poop with other men.
Perhaps I should have only agreed to this King Match if it could have been a Feces, Semen, and Blood Match? Would that be fair, Peter? If not, then why did you and your team do it to The Connection?
Personally, if it had been me, I wouldn't have given a shit. I have no problem competing in a match where I must bury someone in a pile of spunk. But I'm not your ordinary athlete. As a matter of fact, if I wanted to, I would have all three of us compete in a shipping container full of dead bodies and I would feel right at home, but where's the fun in scaring off all of the competition?
You see, I don't scare off the competition because I'm not this 'paper champion' that you and a few others claim me to be.
Wild Card Weekend happened and I defended my crown against a worthy opponent who goes by the name of Luca Arzegotti.
A Rumble in Brooklyn happened and I'm about to defend my crown against one worthy challenger and one unworthy challenger.
Do you truly believe that you are worthy of the top singles title in the business? If so, give me one example of a time where you've proven yourself to be worthy. Just one example where you overcame the odds and walked out victorious.
You can't, Peter, because it doesn't exist. Your best moments in the XWF took place with you and other men. At Mega Madness, those men won't be there to help you, Peter. No one will be there to help you win or lose. You won't be able to have Sid and Poppa take me out so that you can pin me, and you won't be able to say that this '
' only beat you because Luca interfered. Peter Gilmour, next Monday, this is going to pin you cleanly with his sweaty crotch rubbed up against your face. That's right, LJ. You might be new and inexperienced but that doesn't make you the weaker man. Therefor, If Peter is in the ring then that's who I plan on pinning. Why?
Because he's fat, slow, and weak.
More on that later though.
To be continued!