X-treme Wrestling Federation

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XWF Monday Madness 6/1/15 RP #1
"Kingdom Come"

Characters used: n/a
Characters mentioned: Trax, Swagmire, Ryan Hunter, Game Girl, Samuel Nystrom

XWF Monday Night Madness
June 1, 2015

(As Monday Madness comes on the air, the camera points to the stage as the crowd waits to see how the night will begin. Suddenly, the intro to Jay Z and Kanye West's "Who Gon' Stop Me" hits the PA. The lights around MetLife Stadium shut off, allowing only the X-Tron to be lit up.)

I
Can't

Stop

I
Can't
Stop

(At that point, a white light shines at the center of the stage, and DMX-Factor appears in that light with his arms up in the air, making an "X". The crowd loudly boos Despite losing his match at Bad Medicine against Trax, he wears a huge grin on his face as if he won. He nods his head to the music as he makes his way down the ramp and towards the ring.)

Ring Announcer: "Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome to the ring at this time, the Innovator of Innovation, DMX-Factor!"

(DMX-Factor makes his way to the ring and slides in. After making it to his feet, DMX pulls a microphone out of his back pocket and waits for the music to end. After a few seconds, the music indeed fades out and DMX brings the mic to his lips to speak.)

DMX: "So, would you all like to hear a joke?"

(The crowd reacts with a powerful "NO!", and DMX laughs it off.)

DMX: "Well I'm gonna tell y'all one anyway. *crowd boos* So once upon a time, there was dis half and half oreo named Swagmire. He was da king of his own imagination, pretending dat his skin was as white as Iggy Azaela's ass cheeks. He first insulted a man by da name of Trax, insulting him for his race and calling him a slew of words never to be uttered in a public forum. And then ya boi DMX-Factor made his debuted, and lo and behold...Swagmire went at it again, dis time doin' da same to yours truly. It was a sad sight really, a man so uncomfortable wit his skin, dat he denied who he was and hated everyone dat he was like. None of dat is anything to joke about, but wat was truly funny about it all...was da fact dat upper management never did anything about it until literally minutes before our match at Bad Medicine started. Props to them actually doin' somethin' bout it, but how in da blue hell does one make da decision to allow two competitors to prepare for a specific match and then throw everything out da window? Dat's da funniest shit dat I've ever heard. But I don't hear any of you laughing. Prolly cause I'm way ahead of myself and haven't gotten to da punchline."

(DMX clears his throat and continues.)

DMX: "So everyone's new hero, Trax, Mr. F'n Dominance, wins da match, basically by default, because things' got outta whack because of management, and Trax pinned a guy who wasn't even supposed to be in da damn match in da first place! But...but...here's dat punchline dat I alluded to. It wasn't Trax dat was left standing. It was da DMX-Factor! Yeah, I got a lil' help from my boi Ryan Hunter. Wat of it? Sometimes, people just need to know which paths to cross...and which "trax" to stay away from. Eventually, you'll get derailed. *forced laughter* Ha...HA HA...HAHAHAHAHAHA Ooooh, seriously, you guys don't think dat's funny?"

(The crowd again boos the Freestyla and he looks around at the stadium crowd. He also looks around at the stadium itself.)

DMX: "Y'know...I'm impressed. Da front office must be doin' very well to lead a four match card at a major NFL stadium on a Monday night. But i digress. Trax. As I said already, you won by default. I ain't mad at cha. Things shoulda went differently, but they didn't. So Ryan and I had to set da record straight: It's one thing to be an opportunist. It's another thing to basically say screw it and win a match by pinnin' a guy who had no business being in da ring. Swagmire got kicked out. Good for him, good for America, and good for us. Dat was da best thing dat could've happened to both of us in our first match, but you pinned da wrong fuckin' guy! If you really wanted to make a name for yourself, you shoulda pinned me. But you didn't. And now look at your record. You're undefeated wit an asterisk. Yeah, you won da match, but you didn't prove shit. You spent a week claimin' how you were gonna prove yourself and prove to da world dat you were gonna launch your XWF career in style, but you DIDN'T DO SHIT! So, in reality, you didn't win, and I didn't lose. Plain and simple. I gave you a novel just to prove a simple point. But Trax...even though you didn't accomplish anything, I sure as hell did. Remember dat fire dat I was gonna start? Well, things are heatin' up from every which way."

(DMX pulls a silver lighter from his pocket, opens the cap, and flicks on a flame, symbolizing the fire that he has mentioned.)

DMX: "I got you askin' for blood now. It seems dat it was me dat lit a fire under your ass and not da other way around. Now you want resolution. Now you have a target. Da only thing dat's wrong wit dis picture is you're targeting da wrong person. Sure. Ryan Hunter may have cold clocked you into next leap year, but callin' him out defeats da purpose of why you're here in da first place. He's not a champion here. He hasn't even had a match yet. You can't chase gold when you're out ghost hunting. I'll let dat sink in for a moment. If anything, you should be BEGGIN' me for another match, one wit an even playin' field. Then we can have our official first match. And once dat's all said and done, then and only then can you start beatin' on female game girls for their championship, which, by da way, Game Girl, dat was a helluva victory. Trax, you can even try your hand at da Federweight champi...oh, wait, you did. And you failed. I would say you could take a crack at da

Championship, but even wit his fear of heights, I think Scully could somehow give you a wet willy and somehow beat you. Or...OR...*points finger in the air* how 'bout dis...You, Trax, can wait your fuckin' turn just like everyone else, because as of Monday June 1st, you haven't done shit! Now let me show you how a true in ring competitor does work when I take on..."

(DMX reaches into his pocket once again and pulls out a folded index card. He unfolds the card reads the text out loud.)

DMX: "...Samuel Ni...Nee...Nay...wat da... *pulls mic away and turns to the ringside announcer, voice nearly inaudible* ...fuck is dis dude's name, I can't pronounce dis. Wat da hell are those two dots above da "o"?"

Ring Announcer: "Just pronounce it as best as you can. I think it's "Nystrom".

DMX: "You mean to tell me you're da ring announcer and you don't even know how to pronou...you know wat, nevermind. *brings mic back to lips* We're gonna call you Sam Storm. So, Trax, let me show you how a true in ring competitor does work when I take on Sam Storm, 'cause dat's his unofficial official real name. And dat match is gonna take place..."

(DMX reads the card and finds out that his match is the first of the event.)

DMX: "...next?!? Jesus Christ, won't anyone warn a brotha? I'm out here yappin' my gums when I could be warming up for dis match. Nevertheless, I'm always ready for a fight. So Sam Storm...I hope you're ready, 'cause I'm ready, willin', and able whoop your ass all over dis second rate sorry excuse of a town called New Jersey!"

(The crowd is heated now as DMX laughs and drops the mic near the edge of the ring. He removes his jewelry and his shirt and hands them to the ring announce before stretching and getting ready for his match again Samuel Nystrom.)