04-30-2015, 03:05 PM
You see Grime and Brittany at a piano. Brittany is not doing a very good job at keeping a straight face. Grime is wearing a unbuttoned short sleeve shirt over his black tank top. Brittany has her hair in a bun and is wearing glasses much too big for her face. Grime takes a deep breath as he gives her a nod. She starts playing the old All In the Family' theme song.
Grime: Boy, the way Glen Miller played...
Brittany: Songs that made the hit parade...
Grime: Guys like us we had it made...
Together: Those were the days!
Grime dramatically leans against Brittany and she starts to hit the next line barely keeping in her laugh.
Brittany: And you knew where you WERRRRRRRRREEEE THEEEEEENNN!
Brittany grabs clears her throat after hitting the obnoxious but funny high note. Grime puts his arm around her waist and smiles.
Grime: Girls were girls and men were men...
Brittany can't hold it in anymore and neither can Grime as every line they sing awfully from here on out isn't really so understandable. They still do their best to get it done.
Together: Mister we could use a man like Herbert Hoover again.
Grime: Didn't need no welfare state...
Brittany: Everybody pulled his weight
Brittany and Grime lean in to each other. Brittany now has tears running down her face from laughing so hard.
Together: Gee our old La Salle ran great...Those were the days!
[/i]
Grime: Oh, boy. Ray Tings, before this Monday, you are going to hold the absolute record in making me piss my pants.
Grime chuckles some more.
Grime: You're just all about family aren't ya?
Grime starts laughing again and Brittany can't stand up and you hear her boobs hit the keys on the piano as she leans forward laughing her ass off.
Grime: You...
Grime tries to catch his breath.
Grime: You've done it now. You turned Stephanie McMahon into an adulterer...
Grime laughs again. He wipes his own eyes this time as they're beginning to water.
Grime: Now I get why the people are always there in Toronto. You're arrival has given Canada their first ever stand up comedian event that doesn't make them laugh...
Grime is still laughing.
Grime: Finally Canada can laugh at someone for once...
Grime leans up against the wall and sinks to the floor. Neither he nor Brittany can stand or sit up without some help as they continue to crack up.
Grime: First...HHH...then Vince and Shane...then you...
Brittany: Married Stephanie!
Grime and Brittany start laughing hard again. It takes awhile for them to be able to talk this time. Brittany is laughing so hard her face is turning red.
Grime: I was...waiting...
Grime clears his throat.
Grime: I was waiting for you to say, 'I've said it before and I'll say it again...man I love being a turtle.'
That comment sends Brittany back into her laughing fit. Grime is able to control himself, but just barely.
Grime: How many times do I gotta tell ya, Ray? Your little insults have got to be more original. Ass clown this, ass clown that. The XWF is full of ass clowns. I know exactly what were going to find come Monday...
Brittany looks over at Grime, still laughing. She waits to hear what he's going to say. Grime puts his finger up.
Grime: A circus!
Again they start laughing, but Grime continues to try to talk.
Grime: When I heard about this whole...me thinking of you as a man with Godlike abilities...I was thinking that a bolt of lightning was going to come out of your finger. But...like the entire XWF...our expectations of that have been...
Grime sighs as he finally can stop laughing.
Grime: ...disappointed.
Grime wipes his eyes again one last time.
Grime: I'm sorry, Ray Tings. I really did mean to come into this debut of ours without seeing anyone as a joke. But, unfortunately that whole issue has flown out the window when I see you...
Grime starts laughing once again.
Grime: Getting married...to a woman!
Grime continues laughing.
Grime: And one that has such...a high...maintenance cost...
Grime keeps laughing.
Grime: Stephanie McMahon...I had no idea...I knew you had bad taste...
Grime laughs some more. Brittany starts back up into her laughing fit as well.
Grime: The only thing that Vince will see this Monday will be your ass kicked...
Grime is still laughing and just can't seem to get control again.
Grime: ...he'll call the XWF...he'll say...
Grime suddenly gets a serious look on his face.
Grime: Thank you for shutting Ray Tings up.
Grime pushes himself to his feet. Brittany however still can't gain control of her laughing as Grime stares into the camera.
Grime: Ray, I'm going to tell you this once. If you can't sing...Monday I will make sure you learn. And it will be involuntary. Keep walking around your imagination family man. Keep kissing the blow up dolls as you fantasize about your honeymoon with Stephanie. Keep thinking that you're something you're clearly not. And I will be happy to bring you back to reality.
Grime jerks his head twice, popping his neck each time.
Grime: And I have a message for you, Ray. And for everyone else that will step into the ring with me from now on. Soon, you'll be answering for your mistakes. And you'll answer to The Industry.
The scene fades to black as you start to hear the ending theme to 'All In the Family'.
Grime: Boy, the way Glen Miller played...
Brittany: Songs that made the hit parade...
Grime: Guys like us we had it made...
Together: Those were the days!
Grime dramatically leans against Brittany and she starts to hit the next line barely keeping in her laugh.
Brittany: And you knew where you WERRRRRRRRREEEE THEEEEEENNN!
Brittany grabs clears her throat after hitting the obnoxious but funny high note. Grime puts his arm around her waist and smiles.
Grime: Girls were girls and men were men...
Brittany can't hold it in anymore and neither can Grime as every line they sing awfully from here on out isn't really so understandable. They still do their best to get it done.
Together: Mister we could use a man like Herbert Hoover again.
Grime: Didn't need no welfare state...
Brittany: Everybody pulled his weight
Brittany and Grime lean in to each other. Brittany now has tears running down her face from laughing so hard.
Together: Gee our old La Salle ran great...Those were the days!
[/i]
Grime: Oh, boy. Ray Tings, before this Monday, you are going to hold the absolute record in making me piss my pants.
Grime chuckles some more.
Grime: You're just all about family aren't ya?
Grime starts laughing again and Brittany can't stand up and you hear her boobs hit the keys on the piano as she leans forward laughing her ass off.
Grime: You...
Grime tries to catch his breath.
Grime: You've done it now. You turned Stephanie McMahon into an adulterer...
Grime laughs again. He wipes his own eyes this time as they're beginning to water.
Grime: Now I get why the people are always there in Toronto. You're arrival has given Canada their first ever stand up comedian event that doesn't make them laugh...
Grime is still laughing.
Grime: Finally Canada can laugh at someone for once...
Grime leans up against the wall and sinks to the floor. Neither he nor Brittany can stand or sit up without some help as they continue to crack up.
Grime: First...HHH...then Vince and Shane...then you...
Brittany: Married Stephanie!
Grime and Brittany start laughing hard again. It takes awhile for them to be able to talk this time. Brittany is laughing so hard her face is turning red.
Grime: I was...waiting...
Grime clears his throat.
Grime: I was waiting for you to say, 'I've said it before and I'll say it again...man I love being a turtle.'
That comment sends Brittany back into her laughing fit. Grime is able to control himself, but just barely.
Grime: How many times do I gotta tell ya, Ray? Your little insults have got to be more original. Ass clown this, ass clown that. The XWF is full of ass clowns. I know exactly what were going to find come Monday...
Brittany looks over at Grime, still laughing. She waits to hear what he's going to say. Grime puts his finger up.
Grime: A circus!
Again they start laughing, but Grime continues to try to talk.
Grime: When I heard about this whole...me thinking of you as a man with Godlike abilities...I was thinking that a bolt of lightning was going to come out of your finger. But...like the entire XWF...our expectations of that have been...
Grime sighs as he finally can stop laughing.
Grime: ...disappointed.
Grime wipes his eyes again one last time.
Grime: I'm sorry, Ray Tings. I really did mean to come into this debut of ours without seeing anyone as a joke. But, unfortunately that whole issue has flown out the window when I see you...
Grime starts laughing once again.
Grime: Getting married...to a woman!
Grime continues laughing.
Grime: And one that has such...a high...maintenance cost...
Grime keeps laughing.
Grime: Stephanie McMahon...I had no idea...I knew you had bad taste...
Grime laughs some more. Brittany starts back up into her laughing fit as well.
Grime: The only thing that Vince will see this Monday will be your ass kicked...
Grime is still laughing and just can't seem to get control again.
Grime: ...he'll call the XWF...he'll say...
Grime suddenly gets a serious look on his face.
Grime: Thank you for shutting Ray Tings up.
Grime pushes himself to his feet. Brittany however still can't gain control of her laughing as Grime stares into the camera.
Grime: Ray, I'm going to tell you this once. If you can't sing...Monday I will make sure you learn. And it will be involuntary. Keep walking around your imagination family man. Keep kissing the blow up dolls as you fantasize about your honeymoon with Stephanie. Keep thinking that you're something you're clearly not. And I will be happy to bring you back to reality.
Grime jerks his head twice, popping his neck each time.
Grime: And I have a message for you, Ray. And for everyone else that will step into the ring with me from now on. Soon, you'll be answering for your mistakes. And you'll answer to The Industry.
The scene fades to black as you start to hear the ending theme to 'All In the Family'.