The camera fades into Scott Charlotte sitting in a comfy recliner, with a fireplace positioned to the right of him. The fire crackles and the warmth exudes itself off into the room. Scott is bundled up in a Carolina Panthers blanket, both keeping him warm and showing his support for the team. To the left of him is a coffee table with a carton of Haagen-Daz ice cream, Cheesecake flavored. He stares into the camera in bewilderment not understanding why it is there. He sighs and shakes his head finally understanding that the XWF sent it over so he could deliver a promo. Obviously, he isn't prepared.






"What the hell am I supposed to say? What I had for breakfast this morning, because that seems more interesting than what you want me to say!"






Scott and the cameraman man share a nasty look and he eggs Scott on to continue. He isn't happy, but he decides to do it anyways.






"I have a match against the King of the XWF and this is the follow up to that match? I'm put in a triple threat tag team match with John Austin, a man who once stabbed me in the eye with a railroad spike causing me to have a mental breakdown and become The Wraith! Not only that this match is going to happen on a Frozen Wasteland in Greenland! I dunno if you realize this, Ally, but my attire isn't suited for cold climates. Do you want me to become a cold ass honky, because I'd rather not so I can keep my friendship with Macklemore pretty solid."






Scott notices that the cameraman is baffled at his meeting with a rap sensation and just non nonchalantly named dropping him. Scott decides to clarify.





"Oh, I forgot to mention, I met Macklemore while I was fired. He's a pretty chill dude, but has this issue with cold ass honkies. This one time we were chilling and we saw this guy streaking through the neighborhoods of Richmond, VA in the month of November. Macklemore shook his head and called that guy a cold ass honky. Why were we in Richmond? To enjoy the finer things that Virginia has to offer. Grass, trees, non consensual incest...the usual. I mean I didn't participate I was only there as a voyeur into the unknown."






He realizes he has gone completely off base.






"Wait, what were we talking about?"





The camera fan says something from behind camera that sounds like he says, "Saturday Night Shove-It....douche." The last bit wasn't heard by Scott, because the XWF would be short one cameraman if he had.




"Oh that's right, Shove-It! That's the whole reason this promo is even happening and by now a lot of people are seeing the difference between Scott Charlotte and that character I played leading up to my match against Theo Pryce, Mystery. Trust me I share the same ideals Mystery had, in fact that's why I'd be saying them in the first place, but the real me isn't so serious. There are moments of seriousness and...."





He stops as he notices the cleaning lady, Rosa, grabs his ice cream and begins to walk away so she can get rid of it. Scott stands up with his eyes filling with fire and hate.






"Back...the....FUCK...AWAY....FROM....MY..........HAAGEN-DAZ!"






Rosa freezes in he tracks and looks into Scott's eyes. The fear of a thousand fears washes over her as she runs back over and places ice cream down where she found it. Without a word, Rosa turns and runs off crying in pure terror. Scott collects himself and sits back down. He clears his throat and continues.






"See what I mean, shit gets real. You don't touch a man's Haagen-Daz, especially when I'm using it to prepare for the cold climate of Greenland. You'd think a place called Greenland would be just that, but instead God thought he'd be a funny asshole and have people live in opposite world. I'm not saying God named the places, I'm just saying God had a hand in that shit."



He sighs in great frustration as the cameraman wants him to get back on track with the promo about his match. Scott just wants to eat his ice cream in piece.



"Honestly, this match now seems pointless to me. Ally, you did a good job setting this little shindig up from top to bottom, but you put me and Austin at the bottom. Our talents would have been better suited for a one on one excursion even if it seems that John Austin forgets what he's done to me. Then we have Matt and Jim ward who have as bout as much charisma as a dead baby and I mean a rotting dead baby carcass. Brings back memories of the time I was Mystery. Matt or Jim, whichever opened their mouth this week, doesn't seem so threatening. I mean they seem like a cookie cutter version of a wrestler. You bake them in the over at 400 degrees and then they come out, a little burnt and bland. They don't have any icing on them, nothing to make themselves stand out. They are just so boring!!"






He bangs his fists into his head hoping he can get some sensation going about the Wards, but nothing can ever come out for them.







"It hurts my heart to have a short ass promo like this, because you'd think I'd have more to say. There is nothing else to say considering the rumors of our third team, Zak Misery and Smoke Man, are leaving the XWF. Smoke got tired of trying to be a revolutionary and Zak got tired of sucking on space balls."





Scott reminisces about the movie, "Spaceballs", and how he loves Mel Brooks movies. He thinks off all the clever references to Star Wars in it as the cameraman snaps his fingers trying to get Scott's attention. He shakes himself out of his stupor and looks back to the camera. He sighs once more.







"Well, this almost feels like I've said everything, but nothing. In the greatest sense of the word...Austin and I are going to WIN. It's pretty obvious to everyone here that we have the advantage especially with the absence of Smoke Man and Zak Misery. They were our competition, but now we head off to fight in the cold against the Wards. Hooray!"





He half asses a fist to the air signifying how not excited he is for the match. He points to camera looking as serious as he did when Rosa stole his ice cream.




"I better not catch pneumonia, Ally, I just got back!"




The camera fades out.