I went and took my drug test today. Third one in about two months since they done let me out on parole. I know why they worried. Ain't like I's the most trustworthy man on the inside when it came to not takin' that shit, I guess. Thinkin' back on it now, it was all pretty damn nasty. When you ain't got any friends on the law's side, comin' by shit gets a little tricky.

Way it'd work is you'd have them guards, usually 'bout one of 'em, posted up by the nurse's station when it was time to get your meds. Well the guy'd be sellin' 'em would go up, show his ID, and the nurse'd hand him his pills and a cup of water. Them officers was slow, boy. Alls you had to do was hook the pill right there where your thumb meets your hand, slap your hand to your mouth, and take a quick swig of water. That, or slip them pills under your tongue or somethin'. Far as them guards saw or cared you'd done took them meds.

But they didn't, see? They'd bring it back to the dorm and sell it for whatever. Eli would send me money here and there for food and whatnot. Wasn't nothin' to buy some Spam and use the rest for what I needed. I always told Eli I'd pay him back when I got out. That's why I went with him and Elisha to California.

See, them boys in the Hell's Angels out that way heard Truth. Eli'd done spoke it to 'em and they had hardened hearts. They didn't wanna listen, so Eli fed 'em to me.

Me and Elisha poured that gas all over that building and I gave 'em to The Rot. Got me thinkin' 'bout recordin' a promo here.

"We got us a whole big wrestling group with XWF and Truth's been spoke to everybody here. We got folks like John Austin walkin' around refusing to hear and rattlin' off his words. Them words like little twinklin' bells, boy. Alls they mean is feedin' time is soon. You think you servin' some higher power, but all you is is feed. The higher power the one you done stole from, son.

Thieving comes from the heart and it corrupts the whole body. The mind gets polluted. When the whole man is dirty and defiled, they's only one way to cleanse him, John. Only one way to get you right since you ain't aimin' to hear Truth.

The Rot's gonna gobble you up, boy.

You steal and you rob from The Almighty then you laugh at Truth. You like a dog returning to it's vomit over and over again.

I don't want you to get sick off your vomit, John.

I love you.

I'm gonna bless you tonight, boy."

I record that and send it off. Is what I'm doin' right? Sometimes it's hard to tell. I feel right. I feel strong.

I still think about that old lady. Her granddaughter called me a monster. I ain't. I'm a god. A god marked before birth by The Almighty.

Still, I know sometimes it's easy to get gods and monsters mixed up. I know why. I know why that girl hated me. I know why people hate me and I know why they hate The Truth.

The Truth shines a light on their wicked hearts. It shows them the ugly side of the world and the ugly side of theyselves. It's the wise man that accepts me. The wise search for The Truth. The wise don't fight against The Rot. The wise beg for it. Without The Rot, how they think they souls gonna be set free? They be stuck in this misery without The Rot.

I do favors. I help and bring words of Truth. They steal.

I'm the monster.

I sit here on my bed whittling a piece of wood. Been workin' on it a few days now. This thing gone be a totem I'm gonna bless for the little boy lives two doors down. His old man accepted The Rot but the boy don't know what that means. I'll teach him and this'll keep the evil away from him. Keep him clean for The Almighty.

Whittling keeps my head clear.

2-1-0
John Austin
The Company
The Black Circle