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~~Frodo mother fucking Smackins~~ · **01-05-2014, 09:43 PM**

Frodo and Crack just watched the last two videos uploaded by Hank "Pedophile" Lane, again their jaws collectively dropped.

Call Sayors, call him now. I want him at the apartment first thing in the morning. I have to set shit straight, and I will be sober for this. Dead sober. I'm going the fuck home.

Frodo headed off to uncertain sleepage, and then the most serious interview of his life, thus far.

THE NEXT MORNING

Frodo woke up, showered, ate breakfast, and all that normal stuff. One thing was out of place, though; he did not take any pills, blow, or liquor. This was not like him, he normally would be entirely trashed by now, but today was special. There was a knock at the door, it must be Sayors now.

Sayors, good we need to dispel some myths circulating about me. I want to set the record straight on a lot of important facts that Child Raping Hank messed up.

Ok, let's begin. Where do you want to start?

First of all, Clawson has 12,000 people in it, and it is part of the Detroit Metro area, that means you're not likely to just randomly find people who know me just off the street, especially by the name Frodo Smackins. I am not a known figure yet, I've yet to have my own match. He got lucky with Pastor Howie, but Howie is a friend of my mother's, he baptised me, and he did the service for when my father passed away. He paid people to pretend to know me.

Secondly, I was not born in Clawson, no one was. I born at Beaumont Royal Oak, in Royal Oak, Michigan. That's another suburb of Detroit, same as Clawson. I also did not spend my childhood here, I spent it in Royal Oak, but seeing as how the entire area is one big city separated into tiny boroughs essentially, I would venture over to Clawson, and had friends here. My childhood home was off of 11 mile, not here.

Thirdly, I was not a juvenile delinquent, I was an honor roll student, and a star athlete. If he would have checked my record with the company he would have seen that I went all-state in high school, and got a scholarship to U of M for athletics. Students who go around fellating equestrians, masturbating on flag poles, or fucking a corpse do not get those scholarships. Also, Rigor Mortis would not get me stuck in a corpse, or one stuck in me. Where the fuck is this

getting his facts? Who the hell does he think he's fooling?

Lastly before I start telling you my life story in a condensed fashion, some important facts to consider about this city, and me. As I said, Clawson is a suburb of Detroit, where the fuck we gonna find a horse? This town smells less than Chicago, and his fucking car was made here. I am not a known wrestler, I have yet to debut. No one really knows who Frodo Smackins is, my ex-wife and mother did not even know about me joining the XWF, so shove those lies up your stupid boy touching ass, Laney. The Clawson newspapers are in fact going to be either, The Clawson Mirror, or the Clawson News. If he wanted to go outside the town we still would not find one called anything register. Really that was his lie? Is he writing for the daily bugle? Call Spider-man! And my high school Principal is dead. I wanted to go to his funeral, but I was in jail serving time for possession at the time.

So, you've been to jail? Was it here?

No, it was in California, right before I moved home. We'll get to that in a bit. Let's go to the beginning. I was born to Frederick Ward Sr, and his wife Marie Ward. I'm the youngest of two boys, my older brother is named for my mother's father, Charles, and I for my father, Frederick Ward Jr. My father was a Vietnam Veteran turned High School Principal, my mother worked at the Big Boy over on West Maple in Troy. I had a semi-normal childhood, except my mother was extremely abusive, emotionally.

I was smaller than Charles, and not as good at Hockey or Football, so my mother would always demean me. My father would defend me, I was his pride and joy, I was going to be like him, and go to U of M, but not for education. No, my father wanted to me learn accounting and work as a CPA, or become a doctor. Instead I got dual masters in Business management, and this new program out there Computer Studies. I jumped ahead a little, let's back track. Around 10 I got into Krav Maga and kung fu. This is when we saw where I was good, fighting. When I got into high school I went for the wrestling team.

Due to my small size, and previous training on balance and the ilk I became a star quickly, all four years going to the state championships. My senior year I actually went all state, and got invited to wrestle for University of Michigan at Ann Arbor. I took the chance. I loved my small town of Royal Oak, but it was time for me to move on, and move on I did. At this point in my life I didn't drink, didn't party, didn't smoke, nothing that would mess up my wrestling career, or make my principal look bad. He was my father after all.

In college I met this girl from Clawson, her name was Gwen Cooper, and she was beautiful. Here she is, [Image: SW3_6RER_2554.jpg]

We began to date for a while, and things went well. Then I realised something about myself that I didn't learn in high school, I am incapable of being monogamous. I cheated on her, and with multiple people. I loved her, but she wasn't enough to satisfy me, so I strayed. She found out, and we broke up. I was in hell, so I went to chill with my room mate and some of his friends. One of them let me try ecstasy for the first time, and I didn't like it, but I did learn something else about me that night. I was attracted to men.

I slept with a few guys around campus, but round up getting Gwen back. I promised to be true to her, and I tried my hardest. It worked, until we graduated. Right after we both graduated, I did advanced classes, and took on as heavy of a workload as I could to get done quicker thus turning a 4 year into a 2 year, and while she finished her BA I finished my Masters, I got a job offer from this small company in California. This was in 1998, and I had never heard of them before, no one had. I headed out there to check it out and fell in love. This was a big risk because we found out that Gwen was pregnant, so we got married and she got a job and we hoped for the best. I would be helping keep the servers online, and run the behind the scenes work.

That's where I met Crack, Z, and Beef. Z got the others on pills and I stayed sober, if I wasn't drinking or anything I could be faithful to Gwen, right? Sure. My dad got sick around 2006, and I flew home to be with him for a while. The doctor said it was terminal, and he didn't have much time left, but after a month or so he was doing better, so I went back to CA. When I was down there Z got me to try some Benzos to relax, which worked, but I started spiraling. Soon I was doing Coke in the bathrooms at work, and crack with some of the local strippers. I began cheating as well. I had several side relationships, but Gwen didn't know about them, it was good.

Until I got arrested. For Coke, not that much, just enough to get sentenced to 14 months in jail. And on the day I went in my dad died. I didn't get to go the funeral, I was cross country and incarcerated. Gwen found out about my affairs and she divorced me and moved home to Clawson. I got fired, and shortly after so did Crack, Beef, and Z. As soon as I got out I moved home to be near my kid, the crew had nothing else to do and Beef was from here, and his father was dying as well.

I started wrestling for easy money, and now here we are. There, that's the truth. I'm sexually insatiable, and drugged out of my mind. But I lost the three people I care most about, so fuck off. And yes, Joseph is still alive, but he hates me, and Gwen refuses to speak to me if she doesn't have to. I'm not a good father, but I try.

Wow. Is there more you wanted to talk about?

Later. I'm getting drunk.

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