my favrit!!!



The scene opens at Jimmy's Chicken X-Press, located somewhere in the great state of Texas. It's an hour away from closing time as the last batch of customers walk in to order their $7.99 chicken strip value meals. We go into the kitchen to check up on the crew. We see Dave Pryce, soon to be known as The Dimallisher, working hard at the fry station.


I.

The Dimallisher: "We need more french fries, Jimmy!!"

Davy yelled this at the top of his lungs, informing his manager that he needed for my crinkly treats for his fry station.

Jimmy: "Here you go, Dave. You don't need to scream that loud when you need something. In fact, I think the whole restaurant heard you."

Davy, who had to be the most spirited fry chef in all of North America, piled the frozen crinkle fries into the fryer basket like he was scooping water out of a leaky boat.

Jimmy: "Jesus Christ, Dave. Do you have to do it like that? Just go on your break, you're making more of a mess than anything else."

The Dimallisher: "Yay!!"

Jimmy takes a closer look at the fry cooker when he notices something is off.

Jimmy: "David, why did you put your hat into the fryer?"

Jimmy scoops out Davy's hat with a spatula. It's the same hat that all of the employees are required to wear except that it's soaked in oil.

Jimmy: "Fuckin' Dave... whatever."



II.

Davy walks into the break area of the restaurant where his friend Sandy is on break smoking a cigarette and handling a pouch full of chicken bites.

Sandy: "What're you doin', Davy?"

The Dimallisher: "Hi Sandy!! I threw my hat in the fryer again and Jimmy got mad, haha!!"

Sandy: "Aw hell, Davy. You need to give that man a break."

The Dimallisher: "Jimmy knows I'm just messing around, haha!!"

Sandy: "No, seriously. He was tellin' me earlier today about how he's got a special job lined up for ya'."

The Dimallisher: "For me?!!"

Sandy: "For you, sweetie."

The Dimallisher: "JIMMY!!"

Like a kid on Christmas morning, Jimmy dashed out of the break room, stomping his feet and flailing his arms in all directions, smacking himself in the head a couple of times.

Sandy: "I'll need to start working on my figure if this deal goes through."



III.

Davy bursts into Jimmy's office without warning.

Jimmy scrambles to fix himself up as he sits at his computer with his cock in his hand and some fetish pictures on the computer monitor.

Jimmy: "God damn it-- forgot to lock the door. Dave, why are you in my office?"

The Dimallisher: "Jimmy, Sandy told me that you have a special job for me!!"

Jimmy: "Did she now? I told her not to say anything... Whatever... Dave, close the door and have a seat, dude..."

Door shut and seated.

Jimmy is still unable to take the fetish porn off of his computer screen so he says to hell with it and leaves it up. It's like a lovely backdrop devoted to pussy and toe sucking.

Jimmy: "It's not like this is the first time you've seen it anyway."

The Dimallisher: "So what's my new job? Am I getting promoted?!!"

Jimmy: "Well, I'm not even sure if I want to go through with this, Dave. But money is tight right now and I'm desperate to get our name out there."

The Dimallisher: "I'll do anything, Jimmy. I'm your guy!!"

Jimmy: "Would you be willing to put your body on the line?"

The Dimallisher: "Umm..."

Jimmy: "How tall are you by the way? You're a pretty big boy. Have you considered lifting? Also, what do you know about professional wrestling?"

Overwhelmed by the plethora of questions, Davy the soon-to-be Dimallisher scratches his head in response.

Jimmy: "You know, the thing where those guys walk out to the ring in spandex shorts and slam each other on chairs?"

The Dimallisher: "Like... like John Cena and Peter Gilmour?!!"

Jimmy: "Yeah! Those are the guys. Dave, what if you got to do that job FOR FREE? Doesn't that sound like fun?"

The Dimallisher: "Uhhhh, well, I don't know, Jimmy... I-- I don't even have a finishing move. I also luh-luh-lack the f-f-formal training requirements needed.-"

Jimmy: "Don't worry about the training, we'll work on that. As for your finishing move... Well, just make one! What's your favorite wrestling hold in the whole world?"

The Dimallisher: "HEADLOCK!!"

Jimmy: "HEADLO-- wait-- what? Headlock? Are you serious, Dave?"

The Dimallisher: "Yes, the headlock is my favorite wrestling hold. It is by far the most effective way to control an aggressor."

Jimmy: "Okay... Dave, what about, like, a fireman's carry or a choke slam? A headlock is very basic. You need a move that's going to set you apart from everyone else."

The Dimallisher: "You asked me what my favorite wrestling hold was, you didn't ask what my finishing move would be."

Jimmy: "So what would your finisher be then? What is your big move?"

The Dimallisher: "The... 'The demol-ish-ment.'"

Jimmy: "The dem-what? What the fuck is that?"

The Dimallisher: "The Dem-ol-ish-ment. It-It is the move that I use to finish off my opponents, Jimmy."

Jimmy: "Uh, that sounds like a cool name and all, but what is it?"

The Dimallisher: "It's a very special wrestling move that I can't explain in words. I would have to show you in the ring!!"

Jimmy: "Alright. Show me, but don't actually slam me or choke me out, Dave. Just give me an idea of what this move looks like."

The Dimallisher: "I would, buh-buh-but I don't want to hurt you, Jimmy. I think it would be best that I save all bloodshed for the squared circle where a licensed referee can officiate our wrestling."

Jimmy: "Oh come on! Don't wimp out on me, Dave. Show me what you got. I need to know that I'm sending the right guy out there to represent Jimmy's Chicken X-Press. "

Jimmy stands up and removes his jacket. He squares off his feet and gets into his fighting stance with his hands up.

Jimmy: "Pretend like I'm John Cena or Peter Gilmour and you're in the main event of Lethal Lottery. What are you gonna do?"

The Dimallisher: "Puh-Puh-Please, Jimmy. I duh-duh-do not think that this is the appropriate time for us to engage in hand to hand combat."

Jimmy: "Is that right?"

Out of nowhere, Jimmy slaps Dave across the face!

Jimmy: "Take that!"

The Dimallisher: "Ji-Ji-Jimmy please, I do n-n-not wish to engage in combat with you. You are my buh-buh-boss..."

Jimmy shoves Dave. Now business is really picking up.

Dave tries a different approach. He tries to role play as one of the XWF superstars instead.

Jimmy: "Oh shit, Dave. Peter Gilmour just laid his hands on you. What's your response?"

The Dimallisher: "Puh-Puh-Peter, please don't do that or I will have to get violent with you, s-sir. I-I-I don't care if you are the eleven time X-Treme Heavyweight Champion."

Jimmy: "SUCK MY DICK, YOU !"

Holy shit, this is getting too realistic now.

The Dimallisher: "SUCK YOUR DICK?! SUCK ON THIS!!"

Dave charges full speed at Jimmy and takes him out with a devastating big boot!

Like Jimmy, we

fade
to
black

I hate people who look different

and if u dont like it then u can leave