Tri Bute: Our Future Lord, Our Great Future King: A Biographical Future Comic
ISSUE #18 (Part 2)
Execution: Mel Odramatic

Previously on ISSUE #18:

“Choke them with justice. Gut them integrity. Overwhelm them with zankustility. End them with Zeusrion.”

“That’s what Zeusrion would do, right?”

“If he stood in your future shoes, yes.”

“Your future sponge bath awaits!”

“Use your R.E.C.T.U.M.! Use every future ounce!"

“I don’t want you to future end up like your father.”

“And just how did my future father future end up?”

"Just don't accidentally future point at our great future king. He hates it when he gets future pointed at or future laughed at."

Tri Bute's future servants adjusted and fastened his future oufit for him until he was finally ready to future hang the future bastard.

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Tri Bute future walked down the main future staircase. In just fifty-three future minutes and nine future seconds it would be future sun down! That's future showtime. Tri Bute was finally through with all of the future day's future kingly duties and all of his future chores. He was formerly future dressed; he even squeezed himself into a future corset. As he made his future exit he was flagged down by the HSO.

“One future moment, my great future king, the future geologist is here,”

Mel paused mid-sentence and put on his future sunglasses.

“To future rock you.”

“Uggggggh, the future geologist? I don’t care about future rocks, Mel, not one future bit. I have a future hanging to attend if you’ll excuse me.”

Mel took his future sunglasses back off.

“My future liege, the future geologist says it’s super important, like, really super of the utmost future important.” Mel put on his future sunglasses.

“The utmost future important, you say? You should future say that properly in the presence of your great future king. I wouldn’t want to have you future arrested for Improper Word Use Treason Thievery, sir,” said Tri Bute as Mel took his future sunglasses back off.

“My future apologies, my great future king. I meant, the future geologist thinks this is, like, really super of th-,” Mel stopped himself and stuttered over that last future word.

“Of the what?”

“Of the utmost future importance,” said Mel as put on his future sunglasses.

“Fine, send him in, but if it’s another future lecture on igneous future rocks you both get the future rope! We are running out of future time! It’s almost future sun down!”

“There may not even be a future sun down!” Mel slammed his future fist on the future table. He was so serious.

“Get your future hand off the future table, future swine. I’d hate to have you future arrested for Table Touching Treason Thievery!” shouted Tri Bute.

Mel moved his future hand away quickly, the last future guy to commit the four intolerable not good ‘T’s was turned into future grass and eaten by future goats. Mel hated future goats, almost as much as he hated future grass.

“I’m future sorry for being so reckless, my great future king. It’s just that it’s an emergency future situation and you really need to future see the future geologist,” said Mel as he put his future sunglasses back on to cover up the future tears. His future wife left him recently for touching the future table at the wrong future time. I guess this hit too close to future home for him.

“At least you were future sorry. My Zeusrion damn great grandpapa never was,” Tri Bute’s future eyes began to future water.

“Bring it in, my future king,” Mel held his future arms out wide ready to take his superior in.

Tri Bute fell into Head Security Officer Odramatic’s waiting future arms. The two stood bound together by a future force they didn’t quite understand. The justice, integrity, zankuskility, and Zeusrion began to build up in their future souls. It pushed and pushed waiting for some kind of release. A future load was taken off them both, as they grew wet, but not fully satisfied, not yet.

Tri Bute let go, “Enough of that, Mel, I’d hate to have you future arrested for Hugging Too Long Treason Thievery.”

Mel quickly apologized. It was a future bit awkward after that, they both just stood there until Tri Bute decided to end the encounter. It was probably against the future law for Mel to end it.

“Okay, Mel, it’s been future nice catching up with you and all, but I’ve got a future hanging soon. Toodleoo!”

Tri Bute future waved him future goodbye, as did Mel. They went off there on there own ways. Tri Bute stopped by the future exit to his future palace. He was ready to go. He could future feel his great grandpapa’s last future breaths against his future cheek, his right future cheek. Tri Bute future looked down at his future shirt. He began to run his ten future fingered future hands up and down his future chest. It was smooth and soft as opposed to the rough and hard counterparts that one buys at future Target. Tri Bute liked his future shirt, very much. His great grandpapa tried to future steal that away from him. What a future jerk.

That’s why Zeusrion made justice. That’s why Zeusrion created integrity. That’s why Zeusrion gave future birth to zankustility. That’s why Zeusrion formed Zeusrion. That’s why J.I.Z.Z. is so thick. It’s meant to protect the future items that are sacred. The essentials will be covered in J.I.Z.Z., our future will be covered in J.I.Z.Z., and our future meals will be covered in J.I.Z.Z.; when that future shirt wearing, swag mooching, thief gets what he deserves nothing will be able to st-

“My future savior, I just remembered, the future geologist still needs to future see you.”

Tri Bute future stared outside of the future palace. The future sun was starting to dip. There wasn’t much future time left.

Tri Bute snapped his future fingers giving Mel the future order to put his future sunglasses on for him.

“Let’s make this quake.”



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The future geologist took his future time crossing the future ballroom. His future foot seemed to scrape against the future floor. He didn’t even lift his damn future feet! That isn’t how you future walk!

“Hurry up, Geo, I don’t have all future day.”

“I'm future sorry, my future lord!”

Geo started actually future walking, finally, Grievous Crisp, son of Zeusrion. Seriously, I didn’t have future time for this.

“No, future run over there. Now.”

“I can’t my future lord! I just learned to future walk last future week; I’ll future fall!”

“Now!”

Geo began to future run; his future technique was a future bit off, but it got the future job done. Once Geo made it to his future destination, he grabbed his future note cards and future hobbled back.

“I’m future sorry, my future liege. It totally slipped my future mind to grab my future note cards when I saw you future walk in here.”

“You should be, the future hanging is in forty-seven future minutes and thirty-three future seconds. I want to future look professional, I don’t want to be future late to my own great grandpapa’s future hanging!”

Geo began to future arrange his future note cards. They were out of future order. Tri Bute began to future snap his future fingers.

“This is a future emergency, right? You seem to be taking your sweet future ass future time with this.”

“I’m future sor-,”

“I’m tired of hearing future apologies, just tell me your future rock problem.”

“Alright, it seems something has upset the future rocks, my great future king.”

“Why should I care, Geo? We made a future deal with the future rock king. Their future problems are their future problems.”

“Well, the future rock king can’t fix it. You know how he gets shaky, my future liege! I think it might disrupt the future symphony.”

“What’s their future problem then? I don’t want it to stand in the way of justice, Geo,”

“The future rocks feel mistreated, my great future king. They don’t agree with the way you've been handling future minerals.”

“Why do the future rocks care about future minerals? You gave me a two future hour future lecture on how they are different things.”

“Yes they are different, but they are closely related, my future liege. Future diamonds are very much future loved by the future rock community! Seeing them future painted and used like future cobblestone on future pathw-,”

“Actually, I really don’t care. Tell the future rocks to shut up. Tell them that to-future-day is really important to the great future king and their future problems will have to wait until future rocks matter.”

"When will that be, my future liege? I think they matter now, they are future people too, you know!"

"No, shut up. Tell the future rocks that the great future king has better things to do."

“I’m not telling them that! They’ll future eat me alive!”

“If you don’t you’ll be future arrested for, um, Something Treason Thievery!” said Tri Bute, our great future king, struggling to think of a future name for a future law.

“That’s not a future law! It won’t stand up in future court!”

“I’ll be the future judge of that, Geo!”

“They won’t take my future word for it anyway. I’m just a future geologist! They want to hear the future king address them! That’s what they want, Butey, they want you to future apologize for using future diamonds wrong!”

“Okay fine, tell them I’m future sorry, but sound really future sarcastic. That’s a future order!”

“I’m not doing tha-.”

“You don’t have a future choice. I don’t give in to future terrorists, Professor Logist.”

“They said if they don’t hear something from you in thirteen future minutes there will be a huge future earthquake on the Future Ryan Future Fault. That’ll fuck up the future symphony, right? I told you it was a bad future idea to set the future gallows up right on the future fault line.”

Tri Bute weighted his future options. It didn’t really seem like he had much of a future choice; if he wanted his future hanging to go off without a snag he’d have to negotiate with future terrorists.

“Fine, I’ll meet with the future rock king again. I’ll have a little future chat with them and I will be back by future sun down for the future hanging.”

Tri Bute headed for the future tunnel to the future rock king’s future palace. Professor Geo Logist hurried after Tri Bute, but was snatched by two future security officers.

“You, on the other future hand will be awaiting your future trial in the future dungeon. You committed Questioning Future Orders Treason Thievery multiple future times to-future-day and I want to make sure you’re held accountable for that.”

“How are you going to talk with the future rock king without a future geologist to future translate for you? You're making a future mistake, my great future king.” called Geo as the future security guards began to drag him away.

“I’m sure they have somebody for that. You’re a non-future-factor in this whole future debacle, apparently. I’m sure their future translator won’t be a selfish future jerk and future question the future king. The future judge will be hard on you, Geo, prepare a proper future defense if you don’t want to end up like my great grandpapa! Toodleoo!”

Tri Bute future jumped into the future tunnel and let future gravity take him to his future meeting. He passed through the future air at high future speeds. He future felt the future air move across his future face. His long future journey into the future rock king’s future underground future lair came to a close as he landed on his future feet and displaced several future sediments.

You future chose the wrong future day to stand in the way of J.I.Z.Z., future rocks. I’ll show you what happens when you try to shake up my big future day.

“Alright future rock king, let’s have a future,” Tri Bute put on his future sunglasses, “Chert!”



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OOC: Quake sounds like quick and Chert sounds like chat, right?

"Pink is my signature color!" - Elle Woods