As the 9/11 edition of Warfare is set to start in just a few hours, Jonny Rebel sits in his locker room, meditating.
Jonny Rebel
Joe, you are so disappointing. Now, I know this is something you hear quite often, but I relating my disappointment of you to wrestling. Or your lack of knowledge of wrestling. You run your pitiful little mouth like you have accomplished something. Have you even obtained a victory in XWF?
No you haven't. You are satisfied with just pressing that little restart button again and again.
I'm also disappointed in you ability to study your opponent. There is tape of me, man. I have fought a few matches in XWF. Roll back that beautiful footage. I may have lost those matches, but the guys.....or women, in the case of Ms. Callaway, those guys will never forget the match.
Every time Hunter Payne sees a truck, he's going to remember when I put his face through the window of a similar truck. Then the car took off with him. Great shit man.
Back in the Night of Ladders match, I Vertibroke some poor fool from the top of the ladder. I'm still feeling the pain of that.
My 6'9 body did a fuck shooting star press in the ring just a few weeks ago.
Shit boy, I work out. I just don't need to talk about it like you do. I'm naturally athletic bitch, while you're just naturally pathetic.
Quote:You're the type of person that makes the rest of the world hate Americans. They think we are all cocky assholes.
No Joe, the rest of the world puts up a front that they hate us, when in reality, they all want to be just like us. I've traveled the world man. I haven't been stuck in the back waters of Alabama. Since the only place you get your 'world opinions' from is on the TV, allow me to enlighten your disillusioned little world.
People from other countries want to be just us. They want the freedoms that we enjoy. They want to be able to decide who to fucking pray to without getting killed for their choice.
The women want to be able to walk around and vote, have sex with as many men as they want, and not have to wear fucking scarfs on their faces. The kids in other countries just want to play kick ball or soccer. They want the option to sit on their lazy asses and play video games. Don't worry, Joe, I'm getting to the video game thing soon.
People from other countries want opportunity. It’s still true. If you work hard enough, persevere through failures and setbacks, you can still achieve success in the United States. Even you, Joe. Just not tonight. You will fail again.
Other fucking countries want to be like us because we win at everything. Take soccer for example. We use to suck at it when we didn't care about it. Now, though, we care and we are fucking better most other countries.
That is American man. The land of the brave and the home of the free. A-fucking MEN!
I do love me some video games man. I love whooping kids' asses on Call of Duty. I like tearing shit up on Madden. I like me some Mass Effect and Fallout. Shit man, maybe if you played some of these game once in a while, you might get just a hint of creativity to help with that self-deprecating personality.
Now, as for the people in the back who like me.......can you point them out to me so I can go punch them in the face. Joe, I don't need the approval of these monkeys in the locker rooms, or in management, to satisfy me. I'm pretty sure that by the time I retire, every person in the back will have something negative to say about me, but they will fucking respect me man. I don't need friends in XWF. If I happen to get some, then so be it, but I won't be afraid to sacrifice those friend to further the greatness that is Jonny Rebel.
And as for Ms. Diaz, she has noticed me. I can sense the intense feelings of love that she has for me. She just doesn't want to admit it yet. You are just jealous that the only thing interested in you is trollop and nasty, slopy seconds she carries around.
So go, Joe. get ready for our match. I promise, when I am done beating you, Mr. XWF will make it a night to remember. Hell, you may not have to go and get your sloppy seconds.
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